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I the believer was also the doubter

Chapter 3: joy and woe are woven fine (Murderbot, Murderbot gen, T)

Summary:

Written for the prompt: Any, any, robots with feelings.

Notes:

Title from "Auguries of Innocence" by William Blake.

Chapter Text

Sometimes, a lot of times, I wonder why the people who invented SecUnits chose to give them any kind of emotional capacity at all: the governor module guarantees fondness is no requirement to protect clients, and maybe there would be fewer broken-governor-module rampages if the SecUnits in question didn't have cycles and cycles of built-up resentment and fear and rage from their treatment.

Sometimes I just want to find the connections between my circuits and whatever-organic-tissue is in my head and just sever them -- sometimes it seems like I will never stop feeling awful, so why should I want to feel at all?

Feelings help guide security consultants to the correct conclusions, apparently, it's in my stupid manual that ART likes to quote from when I'm especially despondent, and I know it's just trying to make me laugh when it says this, because nothing could be further from the truth.

Notes:

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