Chapter Text
Someone (Auntie!) thought it would be a really funny, horrible idea to celebrate Bruce's birthday a little differently this year.
Rather than dodge the glares, the 'nobody buy me anything' argument, Jennifer ordered her gift a week in advance.
She even chauffeured everyone to the main event, free of charge.
"Good evening, everyone." The strange woman in her black pantsuit addresses the family.
She reaches to shake hands with Natasha, then Bruce, Rebecca, and Skaar last.
"I'm Dr. Gusev."
"No way," Rebecca turns the page of the book on her lap, and half-heartedly shakes the woman's offered hand.
Skaar grunts.
"Alright," she says.
Natasha grins and lays her head on Bruce's shoulder. She holds his hand, and he pecks her cheek...
"There's nothing wrong with us," Bruce finally explains as eyebrows raise, "Half of our problems are at the other end of the sofa. Down there."
"The other half booked the appointment," Natasha adds.
"You're here. That's the first step, often the hardest one," she makes a note.
"Easy now,' Bruce forces a laugh, 'we haven't said anything yet."
"Why don't you two talk about yourselves? How did you two meet?"
"Ohh, boy," Bruce shifts and eyes Natasha.
"You were, uh, abroad." Natasha chimes in.
"I was. Yeah. You were...in the area."
"Working."
"Right. And it was..."
Skaar is making a trigger motion with his forefinger as he whispers, "Bang."
"Immediate sparks!" Bruce cuts him off.
"We started dating," Natasha shifts.
"I proposed-."
"-We honeymooned in Ireland."
"Aww." She makes a note, "You two lovebirds. And then you decided to start this sweet family."
"Sweet," Rebecca snorts.
"Did something bother you about that word, Rebecca?"
"No, thank you," she hides in her book and turns the page.
"Tell me about some of the challenges you've faced as parents."
"No challenge," Natasha shakes her head.
Bruce rubs his cheek, "Yeah. Although-."
"If they didn't argue."
"If the boy would speak."
She nods, adjusting her glasses, "Skaar? You have been awfully quiet. Is there anything you'd like to contribute? Perhaps speaking to growing up with your lovely parents?"
Skaar crosses his arms and grunts, "Nope."
"Mm. Rebecca, you seem to be a fast reader. Do you enjoy books?"
Rebecca grins and lowers the publication only slightly, "I don't, I hate books, actually. This is my emotional crutch to avoid this conversation that will undoubtedly go nowhere."
The doctor scribbles faster.
Rebecca's eyebrows lower, "What are you doing?! That was a joke."
"That was actually quite perceptive."
"She's always been that way," Bruce says with pride, "Wise beyond her years."
"She is very smart," Natasha says. "We tell her how proud we are of her all the time."
"Straight A student. She's going to Harvard."
"Mm," notes are taken. "How does it make you feel to hear their words, Rebecca?"
Rebecca blinks, feeling like she's mid pop quiz, "It- uhhh. Very nice?"
"Mm. Bruce, what do you think Rebecca would say if you were at home to that question?"
"Uhhhhh," Bruce looks up toward the ceiling, "Well. The same. The same thing. We don't take praise well."
She nods, "Okay. Why do you think that is?"
"Reading the genuine versus. Not so genuine?"
She nods.
Natasha coughs.
"Okay," the doctor continues to nod. "Natasha, why do you think that is?"
"Me? Oh. "Well!" she forces a laugh, rubbing her hands together. "Beats me. We're a very straightforward family. We tell it like it is."
Bruce tilts his head, "And sometimes, not all the time or every time, but sometimes, you know, Skaar, it would be nice if...we didn't do that. Skaar."
The therapist turns, "How do you feel about what your father has expressed?"
Skaar blinks. Then Shrugs. "He doesn't want me to talk; I won't talk."
"Okay, I see," she scribbles.
"Wait, wait, wait," Bruce leans forward for a better view. "That's not what I mean, and you know it."
"I know what you said."
"Do you? Sometimes you lack basic comprehension skills. Societal-"
"Fucking. HELL."
Rebecca smirks from behind her book.
"We could all afford to be kinder," Natasha chimes in.
"We are very kind people,' Bruce gently cuts her off, 'kindness isn't the problem. It's the chosen vernacular, Skaar, in public settings. How do you handle your own community? Are you still swearing at them?"
Natasha talks through her smile, "Not in front of the doctor, dear!"
Skaar motions to zip his mouth shut, arms crossing once again.
"This happens all the time," Rebecca decides to speak. "Dad never feels heard or respected by him."
"Okay!" Skaar shifts to face her.
"Not mom or me, we are perfect."
"I think that's time!" Natasha stands, still grinning, "Thank you SO much."
Bruce shakes her hand next, "Yeah. Thank you. We won't be back."
She reluctantly shakes their hands as they file out.
"You're lucky we didn't break the couch," Rebecca whispers on her exit.
* * * * * * * * * *
Jennifer is waiting in the car. She's smiling like an absolute circus clown when she asks, "Sooo? How'd it go?"
Skaar slams his door shut, "Becks wanted to start a fucking fight."
"See!" Bruce tugs at his hair, "This is what's wrong with you!"
"Me?! What about you?"
"Oh my god!" Natasha sits back in her seat, "Save the fight for the backyard."
"I can't believe you two said you met abroad," Rebecca rolls her eyes.
"It's true!"