Chapter Text
“Aud.” Ezee said.
“Ezee.” Aud replied.
For as long as either of them could remember, they'd greeted each other this way. And now, 20-something odd years later, it still never failed to bring a grin to Ezee's face.
The waystation they were on was small, nowhere near the size of the Citadel, but the buildings were high enough in the artificial atmo to cause a strong, cool breeze to play about them. Audre’s long hair was blowing in her face, obscuring all but the turned down corners of her mouth as she gazed out over the station. The roof had no support structures (mainly because they weren’t supposed to be up here, there was no direct roof access) so naturally his twin sat on the edge of the roof, feet dangling in the 100 or so feet between here and the ground below. Her back was ramrod straight, prim and proper even alone up here, with nothing but the wind and the distant workings of the station to accompany her.
Ezee sighed, unnerved by her proximity to the edge, despite knowing that even if she fell, the buildings anti-grav net would catch her. It took some nerve for him to scoot over to her side, unwilling to dangle his own feet, but close enough to touch - and grab her - if need be.
“Any reason you decided to climb up here? Not that I’m not impressed, I couldn’t even get up here without help from a little biotic Boost, but it all seems a little...extra.”
“The windows don’t open like they did back home.” She didn’t turn to face him, but continued to kick her feet, staring at the long drop down. Despite her flat tone, he caught sight of the slightest of smirks disturbing the frown on her face. That small twitch of her lips had him grinning along.
“So you decided to panic the building manager and send your dear darling brother up here to make sure you weren’t-”
“Having second thoughts?”
He laughed, reaching out to pat her hand, then keeping his hand over hers, “Sis, we all have second thoughts about this. You, of all people, worry dad the least. Did you know he had one of the Pathfinder team follow me to the bar earlier? Here I am, having the time of my life with- with Volodya, wishing all my friends good luck, saying goodbye, and I have some 30 year old soldier friend of dad’s watching me like I’m gonna run off to Omega and start a new life as an underground artist.”
His chatter was helping, although Audre was not the most expressive person. Slowly, as he babbled, her shoulders relaxed, and the downturned line of her mouth softened, becoming her Neutral resting scowl face instead of her Absolutely Pissed resting scowl. When she reached up to tuck her hair behind her ear, he relaxed completely.
Auds eyes were ringed with sleeplessness - what else was new - but he caught in the dim lighting, the red tinge that had tinted his own eyes a few hours before.
“ And , might I add, the guy watched me cry like a baby saying good-” here, his voice cracked, and he coughed, “-goodbye to everyone.”
He almost didn’t hear it underneath the wind, but his twin let out a sigh - the closest he could expect her to coming to laughter, all things considered.
“At least you had the guts to say goodbye.” She murmured, dark eyes darting to his for a moment, before her lips quirked - this time not with mirth but with pain - and she turned back to training her gaze resolutely on the height.
He balked for a moment, unsure if she was serious - but, then again, with Aud, nearly everything was serious - and he groaned. “Jesus, you didn’t say goodbye to Emory?” Quickly, he pulled up the other names, “Or Fareesia?”
Audre didn’t answer, but she didn’t need to. Ezee knew his twin, and she absolutely would leave the Milky Way forever without tying up loose ends.
He made another agonized noise, rubbing his face with his free hand, trying to convey his frustration through his vice-like grip on her fingers, “Aud...you realize D’Roe is gonna send me some nasty messages that will follow us to Andromeda, right? And Emory…”
Emory was gonna be heartbroken, and dammit no matter how much Ezee loved his sister Emory was his friend too.
He huffed, “You didn’t even tell them?”
Audre snorted, shooting a scathing glare at him, “I sent them a message.”
“Oh. My. God.”
“Don’t give me that, Ezee. They haven’t tried to contact me since.”
“That’s because you told them over Extranet that you were never seeing them again!” He turned towards her, “Is that the last thing you want them to remember them by?”
“They have each other, besides, they don’t have a choice. By the time I wake up, they’ll both be moved on. They’ll both have found a new family, they’ll both have children. They’ll both be dead.” Then, rubbing her arms, as if the cold were the only reason she was crossing her arms and slouching slightly, she turned to look at him, and Ezee saw that look on her face.
“Audre Ryder I’m going down to get both of us some drinks and then when I come back you better be on vidcall with your girlfriends telling them goodbye and offering to come over and at least say it in person.” He stood up, keeping his knees bent in case the wind decided to try to throw him off the building.
She didn’t reply as he retreated to the corner of the building he’d climbed up on and slowly felt his way back down, biotics keeping him from falling too fast, and catching the service vent that Audre had conveniently left open for him.
As distant and stoic as she tried to be, he knew her, he’d grown up dealing with her, and all of her stupid-half resolved relationship issues. Emory would take that sort of thing lying down but Fareesia D’Roe had contacts in the Initiative, and wouldn’t hesitate to urge her friends and family to give the Ryder family grief long after she was gone - which, given how young she was, probably wouldn’t be until the both of them died of old age. And, honestly? He wouldn’t blame her.
If Volodya had left him with a single email and a half-assed goodbye he’d tear open an Ezee-sized hole in the Arc just to come back to the Milky Way and kick his ass personally.
On the other side of things, he groused, he understood Audre’s behavior. He’d felt all kinds of nervous going to his goodbye party, unsure if it would help him out or leave him sobbing during their last 24 hours of freedom. He’d done a little of both, with the aid of alcohol, which he’d spent sleeping off until he was woken by the panicked pings of their landlord and several threats to report this to dad.
Which was the last thing he needed. Two emotionally stunted stubborn assholes fighting it out on a rooftop right before Launch.
Ezee grabbed whatever was left - some hard liquor for Aud and a much more mellow malted-beer for himself and his somewhat aching headache. He could float them up to her, but he didn’t trust the wind or his biotics - especially with fragile glass - so he wrapped ‘em up and dumped them in a slingpack.
Before he climbed back up he called Aud, and nodded in satisfaction when the line was busy. Next, he reassured the building manager that she wasn’t about to do anything that would have Alec Ryder breathing down his neck, and with an annoyed grunt he hauled himself into the service vent.
Aud used to do this all the time when they were kids. Find a hiding place that was all but inaccessible for adults, giving Ezee just enough clues to find her when the panic hit their mother and their father got pissed off enough about it to order Ezee to fetch her. She liked her quiet, and for some reason she liked finding quiet in hard-to-find avenues. Trees, hidden cubbyholes in the various apartments they’d rented throughout the years, even service decks when they were sent to one research station or another.
It felt like he was the older sibling at time, no matter how much Audre flaunted her minute being older than him. She was damn lucky he even came back, instead of spending the entire night in Volodya’s bed. His hands tightened into fists as a wave of - well it felt akin to homesickness. Boyfriend-sickness? - despair washed over him. He was leaving so much behind...and here Audre was throwing her partners away like she couldn’t get out of here fast enough.
He took a deep breath as he hauled his body out of the vent and onto the ledge. We all deal with this differently. Hell, I spent half the night trying to drink myself dizzy and draping myself over my ex.
Wincing at the word, Ezee took another deep breath. No time to revisit that old pang in his heart. Audre had to settle things before D’Roe’s relatives used their biotics to rip her hair out.
When he hauled himself up onto the roof, biotics pushing his body the rest of the way up, he heard the gasping of his twin’s laughter drifting his way over the wind.
The sight that greeted him instantly eased his worries, Audre was pacing - something she did whenever she was on vidcall with someone, no matter who it was - well away from the edge, laughing uncontrollably through fresh tear marks on her face.
He dusted his clothes off, listening in as she gasped out, “R-Roe...look, I don’t care if you replace me with another redhead but please just-just don’t make it weird for Em.”
Ezee began unpacking his bag, setting out bottles of liquor and cups for the both of them while Aud made lazy circles around him.
He began grinning along, winking at her whenever her gaze wandered over to him, at which she rolled her eyes and ducked her head.
This was the Audre he was used to, well, the Aud he wanted to see more of, especially in Andromeda. More laughter and less brooding.
“Tell Em I’m sorry...and…” She sighed, running hands through her hair. She mumbled, attempting to keep her words from carrying over to him, “And yeah, I’ll send you a lock of hair. Are you sure about that other part, though?”
He pretended not to hear, pouring out her glass of brandy, then cracking open his own drink.
“I...I...I would be honored.” Her voice cracked and she choked up. Ezee gazed out over the rooftops, leaving her to her grief while he waited for her to compose herself.
“I know...I’m sorry. Tell Em to call me when she gets home.”
Ezee perked up, hearing a tiny voice calling him, and he grinned and waved at Fareesia’s miniature profile from Aud’s Omnitool.
“I love you…” Audre’s face screwed up, her lip quivered, but when her eyes met Ezee’s, her usual mask of indifference came down. She closed the call.
Ezee handed her the glass as she came to sit down and lean heavily against him.
“Thank you…” She murmured, taking small, quick sips of her drink, eyes once more cast over the scenery.
“What was that about?”
She glanced his way, then took a deep drawn from her glass, coughing, “Em’s going to have a baby.”
Ezee’s eyebrows shot up, and a startled laugh forced its way out of his chest, “Really? All those operations took well, then? Damn...I’m proud of her. She worked hard to get where she is.”
Aud nodded, “They want me to donate the DNA to get her pregnant.”
Ezee froze in place. Aud and children didn’t go well together, which, in a way, made this whole ‘leaving their home forever’ deal kinda work out. He didn’t quite know what to say at first, merely finished off his drink and pat her on the back, “And the comment about replacing you?”
“Oh,” a small smile broke through her gloomy expression, “Roe says she will need to find or hire a redhead to take my place while she gets used to me being gone.” She rolled her eyes, “Those two can’t do anything without me.”
Ezee watched her expression, the frequent pangs of pain evident on her face by how quickly her smile fell. He sympathized. He pat her back again, and they lulled into silence while Aud choked down her own drink. She hated alcohol, couldn’t stand the taste, but drinking was as much a coping mechanism for her as it was for him. She bought strong liquor and took frequent birdlike sips until the burn didn’t bother her as much. Ezee preferred things that tasted halfway decent, and drank a fair bit more often than her, but Aud never left the house if she was drinking heavy, while he loved going to clubs and bars and making an ass of himself.
“What are you gonna take with you?”
Aud set her glass aside and leaned on him, head resting on his shoulder. Her arms gripped his in a tight hug. “I loaded a couple datapads with everything I could - my research, interesting articles, books, the like. I took some schematics, but everything fit on drives. I’ll be under the weight limit, if you wanna smuggle anything worthwhile.”
She could read him as well as he could read her, and he laughed, “I was going to ask if you wanted to bring mom’s ashes. Fulfill her last wish.”
“And why can’t you afford to bring something so small?”
“Well I’m bringing my medication - just in case you know, don’t want to get there and have no way to synthesize the juice I need. My movie collection - all on datapads, of course, plus there’s other, more sensitive things I need to bring.”
She laughed, nothing soft or graceful about it. Aud even snorted as she got her chuckles under control. “Your toys?”
Ezee shrugged, “Just in case. What if somehow I can’t find a good lay the first few months?”
She snorted, shaking her head into his shoulder. “I actually didn’t consider that. You read the files on our team, right?”
“Yeah…?”
“There’s a gorgeous woman on our team. Trained with asari huntresses. Undercut.”
“Oh.” He chuckled, “Well good luck, sis. I haven’t found anyone so obvious in the dossier. Not that dad made a point to hire people in our age range.”
“I’m sure you could bag at least one of the older ones, as cute as you are?”
He shoved her off of him, “Ugh- No!” They dissolved into giggles, and Ezee, after they caught their breath, remarked, “You have nothing you’re gonna bring that’s...sentimental?”
“Everyone we know here will be dead by the time we wake up,” she repeated, voice trying, and for the most part succeeding to remain impartial, “What’s the point?”
He got up, gathering their things. The chill was bringing goosebumps to his skin, and he shivered as he helped her to her feet, “The point, dear sister, is to remember who you were before you became the Pathfinder’s daughter.”
She met his gaze with a closed off expression, and it sent another pang into his heart to see her do it, “But that’s all we are, now. Dad made sure of that.”
Unable to figure out what to say, and hesitant to open that can of worms right now, Ezee shrugged, looking away. Despite his hopes, she wasn’t going to get better in the year or so they’d been preparing. Maybe once she was out of the Milky Way, she wouldn’t fixate so much ontheir ruined careers. Hell, he had trouble moving on, but knowing Audre, and her ability to keep up grudges, she had a long way to go.
“How about we do something crazy, one last night to do it - just us twins?”
“Like what?” She followed him to the edge and watched him drop down to the ledge.
“Well I know a certain someone needs a haircut before we go into orientation. I believe the terminology ‘too much goddamn hair’ was used when we got our physicals.”
She snorted somewhere above him, and when he’d cleared enough space, she dropped down and swung into the vent in one smooth arc. “Alright, a haircut. And?”
He shot her a grin over his shoulder, “How about twin tattoos? We can get something matching on our asses.”
He crawled the rest of the way through the vent and dropped down into the hallway, turning to see her dark eyes on him.
“I want a face tattoo.”
“Oh shit - someone wants to piss off Dad. I’m in.”
She smiled, proud of herself, and grabbed his pack and threw it on the ground. “We should do it now, though. Em’s gonna call me back in a couple hours. I want to show her before then.”
“How’s the baby thing gonna work anyway?” He opened the door and watched her breeze by him, in much better spirits than when he found her. He let out a soft breath in relief. Of all the things that could potentially go wrong in the future, he didn’t want either of them to go to sleep with loose ends.
“I just need to send some blood to the lab - it’s quick and I can do it on our way to the Ark.”
“How do you feel about being a mom?” He shot her irritated face a shit-eating grin.
“It’ll be over before I wake up. And if it gives Em some closure, I’ll be glad to.” She paused, and Ezee almost ran into her back, “Besides, it’s not really going to be mine.”
He patted her shoulder again, this time to get her to keep walking. Audre shook herself and lead him out of the apartment block.
Ezekiel Ryder would be the death of her, but he also knew how to keep her from stewing in her own thoughts too much. There was something about the complete lack of discipline and morals her younger brother had (or displayed, at least) that drew her out of her shell. And she was grateful for it. That didn’t make his antics any less viscerally painful.
He brought up another picture to show her and the stylist. “Come on,” he wheedled, “Pastels are in, sis, we should get a matching dye job.”
She scowled, “I don’t want to, what’s wrong with our hair?”
The stylist piped up, a youn asari maiden, who took to Ezee’s personality like everyone else did. It felt like she was in a sitcom at times, watching her brother’s antics and the people who enabled them. “Not to be that asari, but it does look a tad...Shepard. You could stand to go a few shades lighter, it would make your skin color look wonderful.”
Ezee nodded along, wide green eyes pleading.
Shit , she liked the color he’d brought up, and maintaining it wouldn’t be hard. The wonders some minor dying and some genetic enhancements could do. They could change it permanently, and dammit she kind of wanted to. She wanted to distance herself as far as fucking possible from the Ryder who, just a year ago, had had a career, aspirations, two wonderful girlfriends, and a name that was respected among her peers. Now she was just...Alec Ryder’s Daughter.
She stared at her dark face, framed by dark auburn hair, and she hated what she saw. Her father’s skin, her father’s eyes, her father’s scowl. She sighed, “Fine. Let’s do it.”
The asari and Ezee chattered excitedly while she held her own gaze for as long as she dared, then she cut her eyes away and down.
“I want it short.”
“Hm...shaved or pixie? You’d look super cute with a pixie, it’d bring out your jaw and your nose quite well.”
Ezee stared back from behind her, giving her reflection a thumbs up. Aud sighed, “Yeah, sure. You don’t think it’ll be too frizzy?”
“Not at all. Your mother had straight hair, right? Plus, look at your brother’s hair.” The stylist ran her hands through Ezee’s wavy, jaw-length hair.
It’s not like she’d kept her hair at this length for years, it’s not like she’d liked having long hair, despite the styles and trends that were popular among military brats. It’s not like she’d liked having long hair.
“Hey.”
Ezee ran hands through her locks, “What do you want to send Fareesia and Em?”
Her shaking hands threaded through her hair, and she shrugged. “I’m sure Em wants the longest strand she can get. Braid it, preserve it, give her kid something to show for her deadbeat mom.”
Ezee’s smile flickered, disappearing before he brought it back up, this time a little strained. He hated when she talked about herself like that. She didn’t really care, right now, watching so much time and energy being sheared away because the Initiative didn’t want to deal with more shed hair and skin cells than their vents needed to handle.
“Hey,” He grabbed the stylists attention while Audre twirled her hair between her hands.
“I want something short and stylish. Maybe a fauxhawk.” The asari agreed enthusiastically, and she began prepping her tools.
Ezee plopped down in the chair beside her, giving her a grin. Aud’s eyes strayed over to the shears held in the asari’s hands, and he reached over and squeezed her hand. “It’ll be okay.”
She nodded doubtfully, and dutifully watched the old Audre Ryder disappear with the sharp snick-snick of the scissors.
After they were both cut and dyed, Audre look at her and Ezee’s reflections. She’d managed to convince Ezee to permanently alter the color along with her. He looked ecstatic, she looked...younger. Less exhausted. Her round cheeks gave her more of a baby-face without all the hair to hide her low cheekbones and rounded jaw.
Ezee’s jaw was more pronounced, and his cheeks were higher, like their mother’s. With his eyes and the rather odd triangle-pattern he’d shaved into his beard, he pulled the look off better. But...she did like it. Nothing like the old Aud Ryder. She looked less like a stiff.
Ezee ruffled her hair, singing her praises and preening in front of the mirror, and she gave her reflection a soft smile. Her eyes paired well with the pastel orange, and it didn’t look as tacky as she’d feared. Ezee looked damn near sprite-like with his almond-eyes and bright greens.
“Like it, Audre?” His voice was low, cautious.
She grinned at him, ruffling his hair right back, “Yeah. Em’s gonna flip.”
He nodded, “Oh hell yes, we need to get the tats quick so she can see the both of us before...oh!” He clapped his hands together, “We should send them pics too, to remember us by.”
Audre rolled her eyes and went along with his enthusiasm. Poor guy had been saying goodbye to his own partner, and here he was working hard trying to keep her spirits up, talking about her girlfriends.
“How was Volodya?” She asked, later in the shuttle while Ezee tapped in the address to the tattoo parlour.
“He was…” Ezee’s smile faltered, and he shot a helpless glance her way. “Devastated...We spent the first half of the party trying to get in each other’s pants and the other half bawling our eyes out.” He smiled sadly, and Audre leaned against him.
“Once we’re settled on Habitat 7 I’m going to scour the Nexus and the golden worlds trying to find you a new paramour.”
He laughed, putting an arm around her shoulders, “Best wingmen in Andromeda! I’ll make sure to let every woman I meet know how damn smart you are.”
“And I’ll tell all the men how easy you are.”
Ezee choked, and spent the next few minutes wheezing out laughter, punching her arm affectionately. Once he regained his composure he coughed, “God, that joke is never going to leave me, is it?”
“It’s true.”
He nodded, thoughtful, “Maybe stick to letting them know I’m open to committed relationships before mentioning how I like to party. I’ll advertise to the meanest ladies I meet if you send some good words to the tallest hunks you can find.”
“Deal.”
They stood inside the parlour, looking at the artists work. A Batarian, oddly enough, was walking Ezee through several designs that he wanted to put on his neck and chest. Thankfully, Aud had managed to get Ezee to change his mind from the matching ass tattoos he’d suggested earlier. Aud already had an idea, and the Batarian had the style she found she liked - technical patterns that mimicked weaves and engineer armor. She found herself tracing her left cheek, trying to imagine how it would look with a tattoo bringing color to her face.
Ezee and the Batarian had reached an agreement, and she tuned in while Ezee talked color.
“Ah man, I gotta go dark pink, kinda purple?” The artist rolled one set of eyes in Aud’s direction and she smirked at her brother’s enthusiasm. He caught her eye and grinned, “Knowing my sister she’s gonna want a darker green.”
Aud clapped her hands slowly and watched her brother go under the needle, his smile never faltered, he hardly seemed to care that the thing would stretch from his left pec all the way up to his jaw. She watched the pattern of crosses bleed down his shirtless form. The Batarian paused at the scars on his chest, and shot him a quizzical look. Ezee’s grin faltered and he grunted, “Don’t cover those.”
When he was done, she smiled, “You look good. I don’t know how you pull off so many awful colors, but you do.”
Ezee puffed his chest out, “Are you telling me orange and pink don’t go together??”
Aud shoved him aside and got in the chair, “As well as orange and green.”
Ezee settled by her side, but this time she didn’t need his hand to steady herself. After agreeing on a pattern, she closed her eyes and let the Batarian do his work.
“Oh. My. God.”
Ezee shot her a smug look as Em peered at them from Aud’s OmiTool.
“She looks sexy, right?”
“She looks like a younger, hotter version of you, Ezekiel.”
He mimed heartbreak while Aud giggled and flopped over to lean on him, glass in hand dangerously close to spilling in her lap. Her mood had only risen after getting what he thought looked like a dream catcher, what she said was some sort of tech design on her face. She did look younger, and he hadn’t teased her about it yet - too worried about her sour mood coming back - he was going to take advantage of his older sister’s babyface once they were in Andromeda.
Em looked sad, her eyeliner was running and her hair was a mess, but she was, like Ezee, putting on a smile for Audre. He watched them talk sadly, Em was as much a sister to him as Aud, and he hated to see such a good egg go.
Roe was in the background, cooking something for the two, but he didn’t miss the appreciative looks the asari was sending Aud’s way.
Worry twisted in his gut, for his sister and himself, leaving their lives behind, in pursuit of something so tenuous as a distant galaxy. Sure, their careers were ruined, but they both had people who cared about them. Volodya was messaging him off and on, but he knew he was likely still at the bar drinking away his grief. Ezee felt his own sorrow hiding at the edges, but he pushed it back. He could hold it at bay until he went to sleep. Maybe at the other end of a 600 year hibernation he could avoid the heartbreak.
Right now it was all he could do to make their last hours in the Milky Way as pleasant as possible.
“Yeah I’ll send everything tomorrow.”
“Hun, send us some pics too. I want a vid of you singing for the baby.”
Aud stiffened next to him and her reply was forced, “Yeah...I’ll send that too.”
Ezee elbowed her, cracking open another cold beer. She coughed, and her forced enthusiasm made him wince.
“So what are you gonna name...it?”
Em went on oblivious to Aud’s overly sweet voice. “If it’s a girl, Audrey. Boy, Rey!”
Aud made a face, “Oh...that’s great!”
“I won’t let it forget who it’s mom is. I’m starting a scrapbook of all our pics together, and I’ll tell them everything about the Initiative and how brave you were for going.” Em looked desperate, a little too close to the screen, eyes wide, lip trembling at intervals.
Aud sighed, “You don’t have to. Just tell them I was an anonymous donor. Don’t give them the Ryder name.” Her words were a plea, but Em wasn’t the best at reading voices. That was Fareesia’s job.
“Look, Audre, honey, yeah, some people are pissed about the whole...debacle, but we are and will always be proud of you.”
Aud blinked away tears and nodded, so Ezee took over while his twin composed herself. “Em, please, tell it how awesome an uncle it had.”
Aud shot him a dirty look, then threw back her glass, eyes shutting against the tears.
Emory rolled her eyes and he heard Fareesia laughing in the background. “Don’t worry uncle Ezee I’ll tell them exactly how wild their uncle was.”
Audre got up and retreated across the room, voice low as she spoke to Emory.
He didn’t have to listen in to recognize the whine in Em’s voice.
Ezee tipped back his bottle and watched the holoscreen on their window shift between various satellite images of the golden worlds. Everything would be alright, it had to be.
In hindsight, all the drinking the day before they reported for orientation was a mistake. He and Audre made it with bleary eyes and a massive headache. They certainly weren’t prepared to handle all the implants they needed, least of all Alec Ryder’s wrath.
Their dad met them at the Ark after they’d been issued uniforms and armor, arms laden with duffels full of their new Initiative-standard gear. Their father marched up to them, eyes flickering first to their hair then to the tattoos, still an angry red, on Aud’s face and Ezee’s neck.
Ezee met him with a smile, and Aud, with cold indifference. He hugged the both of them, hands tightening on Aud’s shoulders as he looked at her.
His twin met his stare, unblinking challenge in her gaze, but Dad was either in good spirits or he was too damn busy to worry about it, because he smiled back, ruffling her hair.
“You look awful, the both of you. What did they tell you about a full night’s sleep?”
“Aw, come on, pops, we’re gonna be sleeping for 600 years.” Ezee drew Alec’s gaze away from Aud, and earned a grim smile.
“We don’t know the long term effects of the cryostasis, what if we lose you two because you’re both exhausted?”
“Us Ryders are tougher than that, Dad.”
Alec Ryder’s attention was already elsewhere, his dark eyes trained on some activity behind them. He pat Ezee’s shoulder and walked past them, “Make sure you tell the technicians and drink lots of water. I can’t have my Recon Specialists sleeping longer than they have to.”
Ezee followed his back until the man disappeared among the crowds, and he shot Audre a look.
Her jaw was clenched and her eyes downcast as they walked through the Ark to report for medical examination.
“What is it?”
Her angry eyes darted to him, then back to her feet, “No ‘how are you’s’ no ‘are you nervous?’ Not even a ‘hey, sorry for ruining your lives and dragging you with me to another galaxy.’”
Ezee shrugged, “Did you expect him to ask that?”
She shook her head, shooting him another glare, “Just because you can stand to forgive him doesn’t mean I have to. He’ll never say sorry.”
Ezee put a hand on her shoulder, and she flinched away. He took his hand back like he’d been burned, watching her defensive posture and her downturned mouth turn toward him. “This is a great opportunity for us. You stand so much to learn, as do I. We’re going to do something never done before.”
Audre huffed and snapped her head up to meet his eyes, “Just because it was a great choice doesn’t mean I’m not pissed that I wasn’t given other options.” She side-stepped another attempt of his to comfort her, and he held up his hands, giving up on touching her.
“I don’t know what you want me to say. Yes, it was wrong of him to do it, but he never told us that we came before his work.” He tried to meet her hard stare, to put emphasis behind his words, to make her see that Alec would, always and forever, be Alec.
The pain in her gaze reminded him once more how different their worlds were growing up, despite their closeness. She snapped, “I want you to realize that being his favorite didn’t make my life easier than yours.” One hand came up and roughly rubbed at her eyes, “Mom loved you,” she sighed, and shook her head, trying and failing to hide behind her stoic face, “And she protected you from this bullshit.”
“Audre-”
Shaking her head, she spun on her heel and headed off towards the armory, “Forget it. I’m tired, and saying things I shouldn’t. I’ll meet you in the cryo bay!”
He watched her go, letting out a long sigh, before reporting to med bay. As angry as Audre was with Dad, she refused to apologize, too. They had more in common than she ever dared consider.
The prep came and went in a blur. He was handed cup after cup of water, had a fully body physical and psychological exam, was told to pee in a cup, give blood, spit, and spinal fluid, then he had to sit in a chair while the implants were installed (among them a new bio amp, which he was pretty excited to try out) and finally he was thoroughly decontaminated and instructed to stow his belongings and get in uniform.
All the while he tried not to think about the life he was leaving and the friction that had only grown over the years between his sister and their dad.
It had only gotten worse once they’d reached adulthood, and long-held suspicions of favoritism were brought into the ugly light. It was true, he’d been much closer to mom than Aud had been, and she’d seen more of their dad than Ezee had, but honestly what parent didn’t have a favorite kid?
According to his therapist, most of them, but he had grown up with it, and hadn’t questioned it, and found no reason to question it now. They had both benefitted from the Ryder name, and both been struck down in their respective careers thanks to the Ryder name.
He’d stalled working through the issues that he hadn’t been aware of until they’d begun psychological screening for the Initiative early on, and he hadn’t wanted to bring it up now.
They were about to have a whole new beginning, and maybe they could all grow closer because of it. He knew as mad as Audre was about Dad, she loved him, and Ezee would never lose patience with Aud’s more infuriating tendencies. She’d been tough and aloof all her life, unable to connect with others the same way he could. Had Dad been right in smothering her diagnoses in order to make sure her career was unhindered? In his opinion, nothing was a straight yes or no answer. Dad did what he did, and there was always a good reason for it, even if it hurt them.
Audre may have been just as successful as an autistic scientist if she’d been allowed to be herself, but then again, the Alliance wasn’t the most progressive employer, and no one knew that more than their father. Just like when Alec had taken him aside when he’d come out, asking him if he was sure, and letting him know that even if people discriminated against him, he’d do his best to make sure no one gave him shit. There were good and bad sides to each decision, something Audre had problems seeing sometimes.
While he waited in the cryo bay for Aud to show up, he turned his thoughts to the future. They were both experts in their fields, both fully qualified Pathfinder members. With his biotics, and Aud’s tech expertise, they were going to blow up the battlefield and settle this brave new world together. A smile tugged at his lips, nothing would cheer her up more than researching all the new elements and plants and animals of their new home, she’d be too busy to be angry, soon enough.
“Hey.”
He was pulled from his thoughts as a woman approached him. He recognized her face - and that undercut - and grinned, reaching out to shake her hand before she’d even introduced herself.
“Hey Cora, I’m Ezekiel, Ezee for short.”
She smiled and then snorted, oh jesus she was cute, “Ezee Ryder?”
He beamed, “The one and only. Have you met my sister?”
“No, not yet, she’s been pretty elusive.” Cool grey eyes studied him, and he recalled from her dossier - she was a biotic prodigy.
“I hear you’re quite the huntress.”
That brought a smile to her face, “Yeah, part of an asari commando squad. I hear you’re not too bad yourself.”
He shrugged, “Nowhere near as impressive as yours. We’ll have to practice together sometime.”
Her face lit up, and her grin widened, “Definitely, I’d love to teach Alec Ryder’s son a thing or two.”
Ezee chuckled, catching sight of a familiar ginger head approaching them. “Hey - here she is now.”
Thankfully, Aud looked like she’d cooled off a bit, and when she saw Cora she ran hands through her hair, no doubt self-conscious of how much lighter her head was.
“Cora Harper? I’m Audre Ryder.” She held out her hand, and offered the woman a warm smile, eyes lingering on her face.
“Finally, both the Ryder twins in one place. Glad to meet you before the journey.”
An asari - Lexi T’Perro approached Harper and dragged her away for a last-minute examination of her implants, and Audre watched her go.
“I never get tired of how you swoon over every cute face.”
Aud punched him, turning to hug him tightly, “I’m sorry about earlier. My problems with Dad shouldn’t be taken out on you.”
Ezee cocked a brow at her, “My dear sister apologizing? You must be nervous.”
She punched him again, scowling, “There are a million things that could go wrong, and I’d hate myself if I was a bitch to you the last time we ever spoke.”
He pulled her into another hug, snickering as he cracked her back and squeezed the air out of her, to her furious objections.
“Okay, now I don’t feel so bad about what I said, ass .”
“You know you love it.”
“Shut the fuck up.”
Things felt more natural between them, cracking jokes and ribbing each other while they waited for their turn in the freezer. Aud was, alphabetically, the first to go in the freezer, and she smiled nervously at him, from within the cryopod, looking much smaller behind the tinted glass. Ezee waved until she was put under, and he hesitantly stepped into his own pod not much later.
While he laid back in the pod, it occurred to him that their father hadn’t stopped by to say good luck, or even goodbye.