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~Old soul, your wounds they show,~
In the corner of a messy apartment coward the small form of a four year old boy, black and blue from his most recent beating. Frightened he curled up tighter and sniffed. He was staring at the wall ahead of him. Suddenly the thickly coated face full of makeup that was his mother entered his line of vision.
"Yuri, now dear, I need you to behave for Alexi, Mama's going out now."
He scrunched his nose at the smell of pot on her.
"Answer me, you littler twerp! You'll learn to show your loving mother some respect." She said putting an emphasis on the word loving whilst grabbing the childs ear tightly.
"D-Da. Da mama." He whimpered.
His mother dropped him promptly left, but not before snogging her newest boyfriend, Alexi.
"That's how you treat the woman who birthed you? Brat. I ought to teach you a lesson!" Alexi hissed before raising his hand.
"Nyet, Nyet…" the boy whispered weakly.
~I know you've never felt so low.~
Five year old Yuri sat with his back against the wall and his arms wrapped around his knees. He was beyond frightened, he was terrified. Conner, his mothers most recent partner did more than beat him. Unlike Alexi, Conner touched him. Hurt him. And at parties, like the one currently taking place outside the cupboard he was locked in, Conner would let other men use him.
Before he knew it, he was sobbing, his matted hair hanging in his face.
Suddenly the the door handle jiggled and the door creaked open.
"Nyet….." he moaned.
~But hold on, head up, be strong, oh hold on.~
The scrawny boy five year old sat on one of the six swings at the park close to home. He couldn't even summon up the strength to swing properly, just stair was the wood chips beneath his worn, to small shoes. He mother sent him here when she wanted nothing to do with him, and not to see him. Or at times like this, when she had multiple men over and the apartment was transformed into a house of drugs and sin.
He did not go unnoticed, however. A young mother whom had brought here own little boy and girl to the park had seen him. Slowly approaching him, the lady asked him if he was okay. When he looked up at her with sad eyes she knew the answer.
"Don't worry sweetheart, I'll do everything I can." With that she walking away and proceeded to call someone on her phone. She appeared to be having a serious conversation. Suddenly her daughter came up to her and tugged on her skirt. The mother took the phone away from her ear and leaned down to the child. The boy watched, astounded when she did not shout nor raise her hand at the child. Only explained that she was currently busy and would be with her in a moment.
He was in awe and curious. Why did this lady have a kind smile and hug her children gently, and his own Mama hit him when he came near. Maybe his mother just needed a hug. He should try it sometime.
~Holed on until you here them come.~
Once back home Yuri waited to test his theory on hugging. He needing the right moment. He would wait until Mama wasn't busy and then hug her.
Currently she was resting her back on the kitchen counter and didn't appear to be doing anything at all. Taking his chance Yuri ran up and hugged her.
Suddenly he was thrown back into the wall.
"What the hell!" she shouted. "What was that!" Now Yuri could smell the drugs and alcohol on her.
"I-I-I'm sorry." He whimpered, tears welling in his eyes.
"Your going to be! Get your ass over here!" His mother grabbed him by the hair and drug him down the hall. She stopped in front of the bathroom and threw him down.
Punches and kicks landed on the fragile boys body, breaking his arm and a rib. He sobbed as his mother dragged him into the bathroom and dropped him once again.
He vaguely heard the tub run and saw steam filling the bathroom. Before he could register anything he was grabbed by the hair and his face thrust into the boiling water in the tub. The boy screamed and scrunched his face, causing it to burn into a permanet expression of anger. He couldn't breathe.
Suddenly there was air and his screams echoed through the house. Then there was was water. Then air. Then scalding liquid on his face.
Next he was thrown across the room where his head hit the toilet and he was knocked out.
~Here they Come.~
Sirens blared and bleary eyed people stepped out of their houses to see what was wrong. Police cars were parked at the Plitsetsky house and an ambulance was making it's way up the street.
(Ten minutes earlier)
There was a knock at the door and Muroska went to open it. On the other side stood a police officer. Luckly her troublesome son was currently passed out in the bathroom.
"Can I help you officer?" She asked, unaware that her voice came out slurred.
"Miss, can you tell me how much you've had to drink tonight?" The officer asked.
"Only a couple'a bottles. But that's not illegal. Gonna stop a girl from having her drink?" Muroska answered.
"Have you been smoking?" The man asked, alarmed that he could clearly smell what could only be the effects of smoking a joint on the drunk woman.
"An why is thaaat anny of yer business?" She asked.
"I'm going to need to see your son." The officers partner came up and put his hand on Muroska's shoulder guiding her out of the way.
"No, no. Officer, he's asleep. Ya' know them brats need their sleep." She slurred.
"I'm sorry miss, but I have to." His partner held the drunken woman back while he made his way down the hall. He saw what clearly was the master bed room and then next to it was another room, with held nothing but a few piles of clothes, and mattress, and a blanket. Her son was no where to be found. Worried the police man opened the next door he found, a bathroom he quickly observed before he saw the sickly child on the floor.
Upon further inspection he could see the boy was badly beaten and unconscious.
"I need an ambulance, now!" He shouted.
~Take and angel by the wings~
Once at the hospital doctors worked to reset his arm and ribs, whilst plastic surgeons slaved away to see that the young boy had now lasting scars from the scalding water on his delecate skin, but the positioning of his eye brows and downward turn on his mouth could not be helped. He would have no scars, but his resting facial expression would be one of distaste until he could learn the challenging task of working those muscles to form other expressions.
Littler did the know the traumatic experience had left Yuri with a mind set and attitude to match his new resting face.
~Beg her now for anything, beg her now for one more day….~
Yuri's grandfather sat in the hospital chapel, praying, now begging his grandson would be alright. His daughter now sat in a prison cell awaiting trial for drug abuse, prostitution, child abuse, and attempted murder. From here on out, he would be in custody of his grandson.
~Take an angel by the wings, time to tell her everything.~
When Yuri awoke the first thing he saw was his grandfather sitting in a chair beside him with a curious brown paper bag. After inspecting the cast, IV's, and tight binding on his chest the five year old turned his attention back to his grandfather.
"Dedushka?" Yuri asked weakly.
"Yes, my child I am here."
"What about Mama?" He said, fear showing clearer in his eyes.
"You won't be seeing her for a long time, don't worry. No more talk of her now. I've brought some pirozhki for you, eat up!" His grandfathr handed him one out of the paper bag. Unbeknowest of Yuri, his grandfather had made them after seeing how food deprived the boy was.
~Ask her for the strength to stay~
To say that Yuri was stubborn was harsh. He just saw the world in a darker light than everyone else. He simply didn't want to. It was one fateful day that his grandfather found him in the bath despretly trying to drown him self. His grandfather didn't shout or hit him. He simply pulled him from the tub, dressed him, and wrapped him in the fluffiest blanket he owned and sat him down on the couch.
While flipping though the tv channels they came across a Figure Skating competition. Yuri was enthralled. And his Dedushka could clearly see that.
~You can do anything.~
It came to be that Yuri now found himself on the ice under the coaching of an instructor named Yakov. This was how it came to be that Yuri found himself rising the top, under Viktor Nikiforov.
~Look up, call to the sky~
Yuri tried despretly to form an expression of love as he preformed his Agape peice. It was simply to hard to get his eyebrows to show an expression other than anger. It was later as he stoop under a water fall next to Yuuri that he relised it. He was trying to form an expression he hardly knew what felt like. Had anyone really loved him?
His own mother had distained him… but his Dedushka… Dedushka hugged him, and read him bed time stories, and made him wonderful pirozhkis when he felt down. Grandpa loved him. And that one lady in the park ten years ago. She loved her kids. And she cared enough to call the police. It had to have been her. Maybe her love for kids extended to him.
Maybe Yuri did know love. The unconditional, soft type.
~Look up and don't ask why~
As he preformed at the Hot Springs on Ice he channled his thought of Grandpa and the unknown mother in the park. He would do it for them, for they had loved him enough to help him. He didn't need Viktor's help. He had his Dedushka's love. But Yuuri needed him.
So after he finished skating Yuri left to the locker rooms and changed into his street clothes before book a flight back to Russia. He would make them proud.
~Take an angel by the wings, Beg her now for anything~
As Yuri was lying in bed in Barcelona, Spain, he had but one wish for what ever diety was out there. He had his Dedushka, whom he loved, don't get him wrong, but to have somene more. A source of warmth and friendship that wasn't from his own family. That's what he wished for. Not a lover, but more than a friend, though he wouldn't complain if it turned into something more than friendship. He was only fifteen afterall.
~Beg her now for one more day~
He wished he had more time. More time for everything. Skating, preparing for the Grand Prix Final, living, and knowing Otabek. How had he forgotton him. Otabek had asked to be friends, and Yuri couldn't say no. His first real friends. Someone who wasn't a family member he could care about.
He would do his best, and he would do it for Otabek and Dedushka.
~Take an angel by the wings, Time to tell her everything~
He'd done well, and the Grand Prix Finals were directly in his path. With the help of Yakov and his ex-wife Lilia, he was stronger. He could do it. To say he felt invincable was the modest way to put.
~Ask her for the strength to stay~
There were some days that it all caught up to him. His past, the abuse, the stress of winning, everything. It was days like these that he truely questioned himself. He felt gross and dirty after what his mother boyfriend, Conner , would do to him. And ten years late him only felt worse. He still felt dirty. His mother called him a brat, and ass, a disapointing burdon. What if it was true though? He knew it wasn't, but deep down he found it hard to believe. Maybe he deserved to be hurt. This is how the thin scars and cuts appeared on his thighs where none would see appeared. Some days he would stare at the bottle of prescription anti-depresants and wonder how much could kill him, and if could do it.
And this was how he found himself today. The bottle of pills in front of him and his phone in hand. Before he could register what his own body was doing he had his phone to his ear and had called Otabek. Before he could delete the call however, Otabek picked up.
"Yuri? What's up?" His smooth voice asked.
Yuri opened his mouth to answer but only a choaked sob came out.
"Yuri? Are you alright? Where are you? I'm coming over. Stay on the phone."
Yuri managed to get his hotel adress and room number out before breaking down again. When there was a knock at the door Yuri got up and answere it, hanging up his phone.
Once the door was open Otabek steped inside and hugged Yuri tightly. And Yuri found himself telling his friend everything.
~You can do anything.~
Yuri smiled proudly as he help up his gold medal. He did it. He did it for Dedushka, and Otabek, and the Park Lady, and Viktor, and Yuuri, and Yakov and Lilia. But most importantly he did it for himself.