Chapter Text
The hum of the cafe seemed to dim as he watched the cautiously hopeful face in front of him. The gentle clink of cups on tables and quiet chatter fading into the background. The door behind them chimed open and a blast of cold air rushed in. Distant sounds of car horns and the busy street outside were there for a moment before the door clicked shut again, closing them back into the warm coffee scented bubble of the cafe.
Levi took a sip of his tea. His eyes never leaving hers. Slowly he lowered the cup back down to the waiting saucer.
‘So let me get this straight; you want me to spend my christmas with you and your family whilst pretending to be in a romantic relationship with you. You’re actually asking me do to this?’ Levi asked.
‘Pretty much.’ Hange confirmed.
‘And there was no one else you could’ve asked?’ Hange shook her head. ‘What about Mike?’
‘Already doing something.’
‘Erwin?’
‘The thing Mike will be doing.’
Levi took another sip of tea.
‘What about Nanaba?’ He tried.
‘Visiting family in Europe.’
‘Just explain it to me again why you even need someone to be your fake boyfriend?’
‘I’ve told you what my family is like. They’re all country bumpkins who think getting married and procreating are the most important things for a woman to achieve. They’re just constantly on my back asking if I’ve met someone; when I’m gonna start dating.’ Hange explained again. ‘Mom was on another of her rants about me needing to find someone, trying to set me up with some dude I’ve never met and I kinda lost all sense and told her I’d already met someone. She was so happy. It was great for a while.’
‘Then…?’ Levi asked already knowing what came next.
‘Then she started going on about when they could meet this fake person. I just kept putting it off. Saying they could at christmas or something. I had planned on breaking up with said fake person but then work got busy and I forgot. Then dad was calling to see when we were gonna be driving up and how excited everyone is that I finally had someone to bring home. That Granny- who’s health hasn’t been great -is so excited to meet my fake person that I just couldn’t do it.’
‘And now you need me to be that fake person so your family doesn’t find out you’ve been lying to them for months.’ Levi concluded.
‘Yes.’
Levi picked up his tea again, looking at Hange over the rim of the cup. She looked a shambles as usual but he did notice she’d ran a brush through her hair. It even looked like she’d ironed her shirt. This could only mean desperation if she was putting that much effort in to appease him. Levi drained the last of his tea and put the cup down.
‘I have a few conditions,’ he began.
‘Anything. I’ll do whatever you want.’ Hange said sitting up straight.
‘Firstly, this is a one time thing. Once we’re home something will happen and we’ll go our separate ways. I will not be attending anymore social events with your family. Secondly, if we’re going to be dating you’re gonna bathe regularly. I can’t deal with your lack of personal hygiene..’ Hange nodded her eyes bright. ‘Thirdly don’t expect me to be all lovey-dovey. I may be pretending to be in a relationship with you but I’m not pretending to be some mushy sap. This isn’t a Hallmark movie.’
‘I’d expect nothing less.’ Hange said breaking into a grin.
‘Lastly, you’ll be footing the bill for my tea habit for the foreseeable future.’ Levi told her.
‘So you’ll do it? You’ll actually do it?
Levi sat back folding his arms across his chest. He already knew he was going to regret it but the look of relief and happiness on her face, he could only give her one answer.
‘Yes.’
******
‘I can’t believe he actually agreed to it.’ Nanaba said.
‘Me either. I thought I would’ve had to get on my knees and beg. I was prepared to do it as well.’ Hange said as she rifled through her wardrobe trying to find the least shabby looking clothes. Nanaba had insisted she help with Hange’s packing. Something that was proving to be more time consuming than Hange had hoped. Who knew picking out clothes would be so much work. ‘What about this?’
Nanaba looked up from where she lay on Hange’s bed.
‘No. It’s hideous. Don’t you have any nice clothes?’
‘I thought this was nice.’ Hange mumbled tossing the sweater onto a chair with all the other rejected pieces.
Nanaba rolled her eyes before sitting up.
‘You just need simple stuff. Nothing with animal print. Where did you even buy a zebra print sweater?’ She asked plucking the sweater up and looking at it with disgust. Hange held up a grey sweater.
‘Yes. That’s more like it. More of that.’
‘Do you think I’m doing the right thing?’ Hange asked as she folded the sweater. The thought had been plaguing her ever since Levi had agreed to do it.
‘Of course not. It’s a crazy idea but then I wouldn’t have had an imaginary boyfriend in the first place.’ Nanaba said with a laugh.
Hange slumped onto her bed.
‘What am I going to do? What if my parent’s find out? They’ll hate me.’
‘It’ll be fine. Levi is a good guy. Sure he’s emotionally constipated but he’s a good person and he won’t let that happen.’ Nanaba assured her.
‘I just hate disappointing them. They already think I’m weird enough. They just don’t understand that I’m not bothered about dating.’
‘Parents get like that. They just want you to be happy. It took a long time for my parents to get their heads around the idea that romance isn’t high on my priority list. Now I’m just their ‘career gal’ daughter.’
Hange huffed a laugh. That was something she knew her parents would never accept. They were old fashioned. Sure after a while they’d finally come to terms that Hange was more inclined towards her research but to them that shouldn’t stop her from finding a husband. To them a marriage and a family was an essential part of life.
In retrospect she wished the lie had never happened in the first place. She should’ve just been honest but it just got to her sometimes. Her mom always praising her sisters and their perfect families and how everything Hange achieved never compared to that and her darling grandchildren. It had came it a bad time. She was applying for new funding, Hange had been stressed to hell and her Mom had been the finally straw.
‘I could always set you up. You know Martha has a lovely nephew…'
‘I don’t need setting up Mom.’ Hange had said through gritted teeth, trying desperately not to drop her phone as she rummaged through her filing cabinet.
‘Well you’re not doing very well finding someone on your own.’
‘Yes I am.’
‘Come on now, I could set something up. He’s very nice and the store manager at Greene’s.’
‘I don’t need to be set up with someone.’
‘I’ll give him your number. You can…’
‘Mom! Don’t give him… my num…’
‘Such a nice young man…’
‘Mom I…’
‘You just need to meet someone..’
‘I already have!’
‘What?’
‘I’ve already met someone Mom. I don’t need you to set me up with anyone.’
‘You’ve met someone? Where?’
‘At the university.’
‘When did this happen? Why didn’t you tell me?’
‘A little while ago. I didn’t want you to get all excited incase it didn’t work out.’
‘But you’re telling me now so you must think it’s serious.’
‘I guess…’
‘Oh I’m so happy for you! I can’t wait to meet him!’
Hange closed her eyes at the memory. Why had she said it? This was a disaster waiting to happen.
‘It’ll be alright.’ Nanaba told her, taking the sweater from her and putting it into her suitcase. ‘If I were you I’d be more worried about how Levi is going to cope on a farm for a week.’