Chapter Text
Max sighs when he looks into the mirror in front of him and he is still not convinced of what he sees there.
Victoria steps next to him and although he can watch her every move in the mirror he flinches when she rests her hand on his shoulder. He has to admit that his sister looks really pretty in her dress and his collar suddenly feels way too tight around his throat, cutting off his airflow and making it hard to breathe. Max feels like he's drowning when the realization of the situation hits him again, coming in waves that he never learned to swim through.
"Can't you marry him instead?"
He knows the question is stupid, he knows the answer, knows that it has to be him and he hates it. Next to him Victoria shakes her head and removes her hand from his shoulder. It leaves a warm imprint and he finally manages to tear his eyes away from himself in the mirror and averts his gaze to stare at the floor instead. He fights the tears of anger rising in his eyes and tries to focus on his breathing pattern to avoid letting his frustration out on his sister. It's a trait he inherited from his father and he's not particularly proud of it.
"I can't and you know that. You're the direct heir to the throne so it's you who has to do it. Trust me, our father is not happy about it either, considering the circumstances, but there's no other way. We need an ally in Europe and considering that Palermo and Rotterdam have two of this continent's most important ports Italy seemed like the perfect fit."
She just repeats what Max already knows and he nods his head bitterly. At least he doesn't have to marry that Carlos guy from Spain, they get along fine but there's no way he would ever do that. The prospect of moving to Italy, far away from his father does sound like quite the advantage. Still, he does not want this, none of this.
"Besides", Victoria continues, "that Ricciardo guy does look hot so consider yourself lucky. I have to admit I'm kind of jealous, brother."
Well, that's new.
Max decides to roll his eyes and he sighs before giving his sister a slight smile. He appreciates her efforts at making him feel more comfortable in his situation. Sometimes he doesn't know what he would do without her. They look at each other in the mirror, the different shades of blue in their eyes clashing like the raw waves of the ocean. Max knows that he will miss her so much when he is forced to move away, the only person in the world who truly understands him. Her features soften at his anxious expression and something inside of Max's chest hurts.
He nods at his reflection, determination running through his veins and he breathes in and out slowly, grounding himself and telling himself that he has to do this. He has to do it for his people, the ones his father treats so badly, the ones that love him and cheer for him and his actions. He is going to secure their future and economic growth and they will be able to feed their families and never suffer from the cold winters again. He is going to make everything right for the sake of his people.
Max is the one who has to pick up the pieces his father leaves behind him on his way of destroying everything around him.
He has to do this for Victoria, his dear sister he loves so much. He cannot disappoint her, the princess who looks at him with so much love in her eyes. He wants her to be happy and he can only make sure of that by agreeing to the marriage and the pact that comes with it. It's up to him to be a hero now and push his anger and sadness away for the sake of the people he loves the most.
Fanfares.
The heavy door opens.
Max's world starts spinning.
I can't do this.
Daniel Ricciardo does look handsome, Max concludes when he walks down the aisle to the sound of a singer's voice and the bowed string instruments accompanying her, and the thought makes him want to laugh and break down crying at the same time. It's ridiculous and he wants to turn around and run away. All of it is a mess and once he stands next to Italy's crown prince it's over for him. He will not be able to escape this anymore if he steps up there and says the cursed words that will bind him to this pact.
The silver crown sitting on top of his hair suddenly feels heavy and hurts his head. All eyes are on him and he feels the panic creeping up his back, making his legs feel heavy and every step harder than the last one. The music in the church almost annoys him by now, way too positive and calm to match his current feelings, like a tiny boat in the crashing waves of the raging ocean.
He remembers how close his father was to biting his head off when he declared that he would walk down the aisle alone, for he did not want to get handed over from one man to the next. He never felt more scared than that night and his cheek still stings when he thinks of it now. But he is walking alone now, with his head held high and confidence visible in his eyes, the determination he felt earlier giving him the strength to pull through and play happy family for the sake of their countries. Plus, there were cameras watching his every move and broadcasting the event around the world, why anyone would even want to watch a wedding ceremony on tv was beyond him.
When he finally arrives next to Daniel and hands his flower bouquet to the children that accompanied him, Max feels nervous rather than angry and the confidence almost leaves him for a second.
But then Daniel smiles at him and Max knows that it will be okay. The Italian crown prince seems like a nice guy at least and the Dutch prince is thankful for that. Of course, he imagined meeting the person he would marry one day pretty different from the current situation, but he can't help but smile as well and feel as if it is okay. Which it isn't because neither he nor Daniel made this decision for themselves. The music has not stopped yet and Max almost groans.
He just wants to get this over with.
"Hey, it's nice to finally meet you. Although I admit this might be very short notice. I'll introduce myself properly, later on, I promise", Daniel whispers, barely loud enough for Max to hear over the noise coming from the instruments. He can't help but chuckle at that and he nods lightly, not really able to reply with words, too awestruck by how chill Daniel seems in this situation. He feels rude for not replying though, so he blurts out the first thing that comes to his mind and the Italian prince flashes him another wide smile at the compliment. Max feels stupid, Daniel surely knows that he's handsome already.
His thoughts get interrupted and the music stops. Max's heart almost skips a beat when Daniel gently reaches for his hand and laces their fingers together, gently squeezing Max's hand in reassurance and to calm him down. It goes almost unnoticed, just a small gesture between them and maybe for the cameras to pick up, but to Max, it means a lot more. He hasn't held anyone's hand before besides his mom's and Victoria's. He decides to focus on the priest instead who is now talking about the meaning of marriage and as soon as the good feeling came it leaves again. Max feels a little sick at the words and their meaning and it hurts him that all of this is just show.
Max wanted someone to look at him with love and warm affection in his eyes, someone who fought back tears at the sight of him walking down the aisle and someone to love him unconditionally, but what he gets instead is an arranged marriage with the crown prince of Italy because his father sucks and so does his politics. It hurts, the craving for actual love and Max had to hold his own tears back again now. Daniel of course notices and just holds his hand a little tighter.
It will be okay. It won't be perfect, but it will be okay and we will make it work somehow.
The priest talks about love, trust, loyalty, and union in heart, body, and mind and Max feels the anger and disappointment fighting their way back to the top. It feels so wrong, doing this without actually knowing each other, without knowing each other's fears or dreams. It's wrong and Max can't do anything about it. He wants to vomit when the next chant begins and he is forced to sing along and Daniel's voice sounds soft and comforting next to him. This is so wrong and Daniel is way too relaxed as if he doesn't even care that this part of his freedom, the free choice of who he wants to love and marry, who he wants to spend the rest of his life with, is going to be taken away soon.
"Come on, Max. Smile for the cameras."
He's surprised that this sentence is coming from Daniel and doesn't accidentally tumble from his own lips. So he's really just a better actor than Max but still, the Dutch prince cannot bring himself to think that Daniel is way more okay with this than him. When the priest asks for anyone to speak up if there was a reason for them not to get married, Max feels horrible for wanting someone to speak up, maybe Victoria, maybe his mom, maybe just someone random but at least someone. Max bites his tongue when the priest asks the two of them whether they know a reason to avoid screaming. Screaming about so many reasons and the doubt and everything he has worried about for the past months leading up to this and he looks down when a single tear escapes his eye. Daniel keeps smiling at the priest and Max somehow hates him for being so emotionally distanced from it all.
"Daniel, will you take Max to be your husband? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and protect him and, forsaking all other, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?"
Max can hear the way Daniel takes a deep breath before opening his mouth to speak and weirdly enough it comforts him, the tiny second of uncertainty and hesitation. He's fighting with himself and his own conscience as well but then he wins and Max's heart sinks.
"Yes, I will."
The Dutch prince is sure he has never heard anyone sound so confident about an answer ever before. Daniel speaks loud yet calmly, the determination Max felt earlier now audible in his voice. He's back to smiling just a second later and Max hates the few seconds of silence before the priest turns to face him. The realization that this is quite literally his last chance to say no to this whole thing knocks the air out of his lungs.
"Max, will you take Daniel to be your husband? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and protect him and, forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?"
He wants to say no, he does not want to do that because he doesn't love Daniel, he has not even met him until maybe ten minutes ago. He wants to say no so badly, wants to let go of Daniel's hand and run until he reaches a place where no one would ever find him. He would much rather die alone than together with someone he doesn't love. He wants to say no.
No, no, no.
No.
"I will."
At least he doesn't say yes, so it only feels like half of a lie. Of course, he will, it's his job and his responsibility as a member of the royal family. He does not say yes, he doesn't agree to love him and trust him but he will honor him and do whatever it takes to keep his people safe. It's not like Daniel is doing something else anyway. He can hear the crowd of people cheer outside and Daniel chuckles lowly and Max knows that he is doing the right thing for his country, even if he doesn't feel like it.
"And will you, the families and friends of Daniel and Max, support and uphold them in their marriage now and in the years to come?"
The murmuring in the church is loud and clear and Max is aware that most of them know the importance behind this marriage, behind the pact that comes with it and the positive consequences for their countries but not their sons and friends in front of the crowd. It feels sickening. They will not support them, they didn't do that, to begin with. If they truly supported their love, which is no there at all, they would not force them to do this right now.
They pray for Daniel and Max, for mutual love and companionship, for their commitment to each other and for a never-ending bond between them and once again, Max is close to tears. But not tears of joy like the ones in his mother's eyes. Daniel is still holding his hand when he helps him to sit down and then he lets go and Max feels relieved and scared at the same time.
There's more speeches about love and it's meaning they have to listen to as if they are trying to guilt-trip the royals. There's words about love being the only way and love being power and it hurts and makes Max drown, so he does the only logical thing and grabs Daniel's hand again. He doesn't love Daniel, but Victoria is not there to hold his hand and the Italian crown prince looks at him with surprise and then understanding and he laces their fingers together to keep Max from drowning.
Daniel sure is a nice guy.
He holds Max's hand just a little bit tighter again when the choir starts singing and if they were in love, Max thinks he might be crying at the lyrics right now. Daniel doesn't love him, Daniel can't even logically love him and the way he holds on to Max's hand feels as if he also craves that feeling of truly loving someone. Max doubts that it will be him.
"Daniel and Max", the priest breaks the silence when the two of them are standing in front of him and facing each other, Max's hands resting in the gently hold of Daniel's, "I now invite you to join hands and make your vows in the presence of God and his people."
Daniel looks down at their hands and smiles softly before he looks back up at Max. He clears his throat quietly and Max can feel his hands slightly trembling. It's difficult for him as well, standing in front of all those people and speaking words that do not truly come from his heart.
"I, Daniel, take you, Max, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God's holy law; in the presence of God and this is my solemn vow."
He repeats the priest's words, he doesn't think too hard about it, he basically says the same thing as Daniel. There's not much of an emotional attachment to his words and he just wants to get it over with at this point. He wishes those words could hold a special meaning to him, wishes he could say them with sincerity and not just because he is doing someone else a favor, even if it's the people from his country. Max cares about those people more than he cares about himself usually and one person suffering is better than millions, but he thinks he deserves at least some happiness in life. Not that Daniel looks like he doesn't spread happiness wherever he goes, but that is not the kind of happiness Max is craving. He's given up on the kind he wants by repeating the priest's words and he knows it.
He doesn't get a break just yet for Daniel gently takes his hand and carefully puts the silver ring on his finger. Max doesn't know whether it's him or Daniel who is trembling more now and the metal feels cool against his skin, like a cage that is supposed to confine him forever. It's just a ring, a simple little thing but it holds a meaning Max would much rather forget about.
"Max, I give you this ring as a sign of our marriage. With my body I honor you; all that I am, I give to you and all that I have, I share with you, within the love of God; Father, Son, and Holy Spirit", Dan repeats again and then the ring fits around Max's finger and the horrible feeling of realization, of knowing that this is official, settles in his stomach. It shouldn't be like this and Max is disappointed in himself and angry at his father and it feels horrible when he has to do the same and the silver shines against Daniel's tanned skin.
"In the presence of God and before this congregation, Daniel and Max have given their consent and made their marriage vows to each other. They have declared their marriage by the joining of hands and by the giving and receiving of rings. I, therefore, proclaim that they are husbands."
Daniel chuckles quietly again when the cheering of the crowd outside becomes audible at the words. Max does not chuckle. He doesn't even smile as widely as he was supposed to. Every single word felt like a punch in the guts and all he wants to do is curl up alone and cry because it feels wrong and he's horrible for feeling like that on his wedding day. He barely registers the next words and the choir, as if he is suddenly underwater where everything is slower and the sounds are much duller. Daniel gently urges him to kneel down and Max just tries to keep a straight face through the whole process of the blessing. He hates how he almost chokes on his Amen.
He sings his National Anthem with all the enthusiasm he can find inside his body and Daniel watches him with a smile on his face before it's his turn to sing. Max feels endlessly relieved when they finally get to leave, his flower bouquet back in one hand and the other one held high in Daniel's. They smile for the crowd and when he steps outside and breathes the fresh air for the first time he feels some of the sickness leave his body. He sees his people, cheering and happy and relieved. That's all that counts.
They look down on the crowd from the top step and Max really does not see it coming when Daniel gently drags him closer and kisses him.
Max has never ever kissed anyone before and it's awkward and he really doesn't know what to do and he is so shocked that he can't even protest. It's over as soon as it started and the cheering around them only grows louder. Daniel laughs and then he apologizes, quietly and just for Max to hear. Somehow it comforts him, but the feeling of having to vomit was back. Not that it is Daniel's fault entirely, no, just the realization that returns once again to mess with Max's head.
It's a nice picture, the two of them standing in the middle of the staircase now with their hands properly entwined. Their parents and sisters are standing on the top step and Victoria looks proud of her brother for not running away from the situation, the guards at the side acting as a colorful balustrade. Daniel waves at the people with his free hand and Max forces the smile back onto his face.
"So, are you ready to face the actual crowd?", Daniel asks when their wedding carriage arrives.
Max isn't ready for the crowd. He doesn't feel ready for anything.