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Mafuyu was restless. Talking to Shizu had done nothing to soothe his nerves and doubts. He needed a second council and had no idea where to turn. Calling Hiiragi was out of the question – not only was he one of the last people he would ask about it normally, but now any conversation they could have would be tainted by Shizusumi's revelations. He couldn't talk to his bandmates either, not until he made a decision. That would leave Itaya and Ueki, Uenoyama's classmates he sometimes played basketball with. But, they weren't quite close enough for this kind of talk. There was hardly anyone to understand his inner turmoil. Mafuyu himself couldn’t, really.
The boy let out a frustrated huff, burrying his hands in his red hair. He felt soft touch on his leg, where Kedama cuddled up, demanding to be petted. Lifting the puppy to place him on his lap, Mafuyu mentally kicked himself, repeatedly. If only he knew more people, someone who could get what he meant even though he wasn't sure himself. If only Yuki...
Suddenly Mafuyu sat straighter. There was a person who got him despite him losing track. Who inspired him and helped. Who due to some later events might actually slam the door in his face. But he had to try.
The teenager gently removed Tama, who walked away, clearly startled by his owner's odd behavior. Mafuyu moved almost on autopilot, grabing a jacket and his guitar, not removed from it’s case after the latest practice. It might be his pass ticket – musician might not want to talk, but music could convince them.
In a blink of an eye, he found himself in front of Kaji Akihiko's previous place. Taking a deep breath, he lift his hand and rang the doorbell. Feeling more and more anxious, the boy waited for half a minute, and nothing happend.
‘Maybe he's not at home...’ Mafuyu reached out to knock on the door this time. Before he managed, though, the door creaked and opened. It was completely different to the last time he came here. The violinist didn't even look up from his feet, so unlike the desperate demeanor from before. Now, he looked like he lost. Or gave up. Or both. His black hair was a mess, tangled strand falling on his pretty face, his eyes had dark shadows underneath. His clothes were slightly rumpled, like he just got up. Finally, Murata looked at his guest.
”Oh, so it’s you” It might have been supposed to sound offensive, but didn’t. If anything, it just sounded apathetic.
”Uhm, h-hello, Ugetsu-san. I.. I wanted to ask you for some advice.” Nervous, Mafuyu bit his lip, but managed not to look away. It was too important to get discouraged and back off.
”Come in, then. It's getting chilly.” The older man turned around, walking back into his apartment, leaving the door opened for the highschooler. Mafuyu stepped in and closed it. Quietly, he took off his shoes and followed Ugetsu, who already got to the kitchen.
”I need some coffee to function. Do you want something?” The violinist asked, filling the kettle with water.
”Some tea would be nice, thank you.” His voice, so loud on stage, sounded patheticly weak in the empty space between them. Murata nodded and busied himself with preparing their drinks, not looking back for a second.
”Are you okay, Ugetsu-san?” The question sounded clearer and so, so much louder. Murata's hands abruptly stopped. After a heartbeat, he turned around with a sad little smile curving his lips.
”Aah, I forgot how much you knew.” He leaned against the kitchen counter, threading one hand through his hair. Their eyes met, and Ugetsu must've seen something in them, because, after a defeated sigh, he continued. ”I’m devastated. But now I can move on.”
Kettle whistled, interupting whatever may have been said after that. Ugetsu poured water in the cups and took them to the small table, Mafuyu following him. For a minute they sat quietly, blowing at the hot drinks and occasionally taking a sip. Eventually, Ugetsu met his companion's expectant gaze and sighed again.
”I told you basically all of our story before. We clinged to each other, trying to push each other away at the same time. We wasn't good for each other anymore, not like... this. Then he met someone not toxic.” The smile on his face was sadder than ever. ”They’re happy, aren't they” More of a statement than question. Mafuyu nodded, taking a hesitant breath.
”Yeah” Single word, and yet it has a reknown violin prodigy hiding his face in his hands, heartbreaking smile still there, lonely tear descending gently down his cheek.
”And now he's never coming back to me. He let go of my hand so he can hold his. With that one last squeeze I lost him forever. We’re over. And it's killing me, but if it's like that, I have nothing to cling onto, so I have to move on.” He lift his face, now full of tears, but his smile felt more real. ”Now I have to look forward to the future. I still have my music. I can meet someone new. Nothing holds me back anymore”.
Sometime later, Mafuyu found himself walking back home, reflecting on Ugetsu's words. He already had come to terms with Yuki being lost forever, with dealing with the pain while trying to move forward. But he already had someone new to hold on to. Someone he didn’t want to let go of and let them move on.
He took off running.