Work Text:
Perceptions are easier to control than emotions.
“Mr. Kaizaki,” the words come easy and there’s no inclinations or inflictions to his tone. After a year at a call centre and two more in support, it’s easy to push down emotions and project the image he wants the world to see, “Since your ReLife was a success, you’re starting your support contract with the company within a week.”
“Why… are you talking like we don’t know each other?”
“I was merely your handler,” Ryo answers with a convincing smile, “Now that you’ll be joining the support division here in the Kanto region, I’ll be transferring to a different department.”
“That’s great, but can you stop with the formal bullshit, you sound like you don’t even know me,” Arata says and laughs awkwardly, “As long as we’re still working in the same branch-”
“I’m moving overseas,” Ryo says with a controlled smile this time, feeling impatience starting the claw at his façade, “Now, I’ve got your contract-”
“Hold on, if you’re going overseas, I’d like to go with you-”
“No.”
“Ryo-”
“I said: NO,” taking a breath, Ryo adjusts his tie a bit before clearing his throat, “That won’t be possible.”
Arata looks at him for a moment, studying him. There’s a wash of emotions on his face before he finally smiles awkwardly, “I see. Can I ask a favour though?”
Confusion passes over Ryo’s face, “… it … depends,” he answers non-committedly.
“One week… can you just stay one more week, until I’m settled in,” Arata says, his voice softer and clipped.
A deep sigh and a glare comes before the verbal acquiescence follows, “… fine.”
With his transfer delayed, management had left the job of introduction and the orientation tour to the Handler. He was to perform the usual orientation and transition follow-through. It left the young man in the one place he least wanted to be. He had hoped to be able to pawn off the duty to one of the interns, but the executives insisted that their division’s first successful cases be dealt with in a more comprehensive and supportive way.
And that’s how, four hours into the tour, they end up in the cafeteria.
“This is the cafeteria, you’ll need to bring your ID with so that the -” Ryo pauses when he feels Arata's hand brush against his own. He steps away from Arata after a moment, he makes a show of adjusting his jacket before clasping his hands behind his back, “The cafeteria uses your ID to scan and charge your order to your employee account.”
“Oh, okay,” Arata says and surveys the room for a moment before shrugging, “Makes sense.”
“You need to keep in mind, you have split shifts, so you’ll need to clock out when you’re leaving,” Ryo says and trains his eyes on the hall in front of them, “Also, when you’re not working splits, you’ll be on-call after-hours, so don’t overdo it with the drinking.”
“I read the contract,” Arata says, laughing a bit when he does, “Fine print was something my mentor always insisted upon.”
For a moment Ryo pauses. It was the first time Arata has spoken openly about his mentor, his mentor from his previous employment. The development this young man showed still took Ryo by surprise sometimes, how drastically he had changed from his depressed and unmotivated shell into his true self. For the sole selfish reason that he was one of the few people that had known both sides of the young man in front of him, Ryo couldn’t help but feel both a sense of responsibility and accomplishment from being with him after everything has happened.
“I am usually thorough, but I guess, when we met, I was too stressed to be conscientious. I guess I should’ve worked harder to improve your impression of me,” Arata says and scratches the back of his head, “Oh well…”
It wouldn’t be the first time that Arata Kaizaki has said something that makes Ryo want to bash his head against the whiteboard. He couldn’t fathom how the brunette could hold himself in such low regard when his skillset was so developed and his company so desirable. Even before ReLife, he had such a gracious warmth about him, how could he not perceive his own value still was something that would forever be a mystery to the handler.
“You certainly need to work on your own perception,” Ryo comments and stalks forwards towards the elevator.
With a lopsided knowing smile, Arata follows.
“Come on. I need to show you where the archives are.”
“Coming.”
It takes them time to navigate the building and it was late afternoon when they finally exit the front gates, and Arata clocks out.
“I'm still on duty, so I won't be leaving with you,” Ryo says with a sigh, turning on his heel.
“Oh, I can stay-” Arata says, turning back.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” with the curt statement, the blonde finally heads back into the building, not looking back.
So, the brunette shrugs and turns. He heads to the convenience store to pick up some fresh fruit before heading home. He takes his time to walk through the park as he does. He doesn’t usually take the long route around, but the soft rumble of water from the fountain calms the noise in his mind. It’s the best weather this year has had so far. It’s turning into spring and most of the chill has left the air, leaving only a nice crisp breeze.
Spending a year in the ReLife project made him realise that enjoying the road to success is as important as success itself. He feels more like himself than he had before. He has good memories, he even met up with Chizuru again. Even though, their relationship certainly had changed and he was aware his dynamic with her isn’t at all what he had hoped it had been… he was still happy. Both of them has chosen different paths, but stayed friends, best friends as it were. She had turned into his confidante and he hers. It was good. Different but good.
It's quite possible that Ryo was avoiding him due to that fact though, Arata had realised throughout the day. The other male had avoided the research lab like the plague and only pointed to the general direction of the division, instead of the tour he had given to Arata throughout the rest of the building. Chizuru was currently employed in the research division. It was obvious that that was then the reason. So, maybe, there was a bit of hope after all. It wasn’t often that Ryo would show his emotions in a way that Arata could easily decipher. At least, in this case, the jealousy was clear.
It made the brunette smile.
The next day they spend working on general office work. How to file each report, what format to use for reports, how the application process works for the medication. It’s relatively straightforward and they end up taking an early lunch.
“Tell me, how is it that you failed Math almost every single test in your ReLife time, but you can work stock reports and logistics without batting an eyelash,” Ryo says and glares across the table at Arata, “Were you just trying to bullshit everyone?”
The angry tone makes Arata look up from his fried rice and tilt his head, “No? Calculus is a lot different than what we use to calculate the weighted mean average for stock costing… so…” he pauses and laughs a bit at Ryo’s murderous look, “I didn’t think it’d get you so worked up though. You really didn’t seem that bothered back then?”
Ryo’s shoulders drop and he sighs deeply before taking a big bite of his ramen. He doesn’t answer, but that alone was answer enough to the man opposite him.
“That’s really sweet of you,” Arata says and smiles, “I didn’t think it would bother you this much. If I’d known I would've worked a lot harder much sooner.”
“You would’ve worked harder at studying for a highschool exam because it would’ve made me feel better?”
“Of course.”
“I don’t understand you at all. Wouldn’t studying harder in the first place ‘ve been much easier?”
“Definitely,” Arata says and an awkward embarrassed laugh escapes him, “But… I usually need a good motivator in order to do anything.”
“And I’m a good motivator?” Ryo says incredulously.
“Of course.”
“Because I’m your handler.”
For a moment Arata looks at him for a moment, a look of frustration on his face, “You really are dense,” he says and shakes his head. He focuses back on his meal and doesn’t say more, even when Ryo tries to pry for more information.
After lunch Arata and Ryou are called to sit in on the support office meeting, they receive updated notes on the reports of the other divisions, the progress reports and statistical analysis included into the briefing. Some divisions were doing better than others, but it certainly wasn’t something the handlers exactly had control over. However, even though they don’t have control over their subjects, they did have the ability to influence their subjects.
Psychology and counselling training was naturally included into their induction. Arata had a week to cram psychology and counselling knowledge. From analysis to troubleshooting, it was definitely something that didn’t exactly come naturally to Ryo Yoake. He took months to get to the point where he could use the knowledge under fire though.
But with Arata… it was like he was made for it. It was like the man was made for work as a Counsellor … or at least, in this case, a handler. He was a natural. He certainly didn’t know the technical terms of any of it, but his knowledge on how to deal with emotionally charged situations was quite impressive. For a person whom didn’t come from a truly troubled childhood, he had surprising emotional empathy and insight.
He had been studying practically nonstop the past five days. He seemed exhausted and dark circles were prominent under the ex-test subject's eyes.
“You have another two sessions with the division psychologist and then they’ll do four supervised sessions with a successful ReLife candidate…” Ryo informs and checks the schedule, “For practice purposes, obviously. You’ll rate their progress, but they’ll also rate your interactions with them. So, be prepared.”
“…That’s fine,” Arata says and pages through the file, pausing to highlight a few sections. He keeps his process up for a while, sticking post-its and highlighting sections of the psychology textbook that he found interesting or thought he might need to remember. It doesn’t take too long to notice that another set of eyes are on him though, “If you keep staring at me your eyes will burn holes through my skull.”
“How is it possible that you couldn’t spend half a day studying with Kazuomi Ōga, but you’ve spent the last twelve hours studying for this and you’re still going?” Ryo states. It’s past ten at night, but, indeed, the pair of them were still in support division’s office.
It’s long since been dark outside, but Arata’s never even wavered in his studying. He had only gone for two cups of coffee since lunch.
“Do you want to take a break?” Ryo suggests and stretches out, “We can… oh…”
“What?”
“The cafeteria closed at ten… ”
“So? I’m fine. You can go if you need to.”
For a moment Ryo studies him, “You …” he pauses and shakes his head, “I’ll go when you go.”
Arata looks up and blinks, rubbing his eyes, “What?”
“Hey… you don’t look so good…” Ryo says standing up when he spots the spaced-out look on the brunette’s face, “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” Arata says and yawns, he shuts his books and sighs shakily, “Um… I’m maybe just a bit tired.”
“You really don’t look good,” Ryo repeats as he walks over, placing his hand on Arata’s forehead, frowning, “You look like you have a fever too…”
The brunette wraps his hand around Ryo’s wrist, languidly moving away, “That doesn’t matter.”
“You should take better care of yourself,” the blonde says, a worried frown forming on his face, “You won’t have a handler taking care of you while you’re working here. You’ll be the handler for someone else. You can’t take of someone when you’re tired or sick yourself…”
With a huff, Arata pushes himself up, dropping his books on the desk in front of him, “I SAID: I’M Fiinnee….” The colour drains from his face as he softly grips the side of the table.
“HEY… “ Ryo calls, grabbing hold of his arms, “Are you okay? You look like you’re going – sit ....SIT.”
Slowly Ryo lowers him down to the chair next to him, “… sit down… ”
“I can’t breathe…” Arata says, his voice sounding hollow and robotic even to him.
“… just put your head between your knees,” Ryo says and keeps a hold of Arata’s arm to keep him steady, “… just relax. You completely overworked yourself.”
“Please don’t touch me,” Arata’s soft instruction comes and he shrinks in on himself a bit more.
As if burnt, Ryo withdraws his hands, “I’m sorry. I’ll be back in a sec with some water, okay.”
It takes some time for Ryo to head over to the cooler, filling a cup with water. He’s not sure how to approach this situation now. He wants to be honest. He wants to be there for Arata. He wants to take care of him. But he’s not supposed to bring his own emotions into the equation. He wasn’t even supposed to develop them in the first place. He didn’t want to. And now… in two days. He needs to finalize his work here soon so that he can spend the next two weeks packing up everything up at his apartment. He needs to focus.
Stumbling out of the office, Arata grabs hold of the doorframe before straightening up. He takes a shaky breath before straightening out his jacket, “Um… I’m …. Going to head home…” he mumbles, catching Ryo’s eye for a second, “Sorry.”
The blonde quickly sets the cup down on the table next to the cooler, jogging over. He wraps his arm around Arata to support him, “You shouldn’t be up… ugh… let’s get you home, you obviously overdid it,” he states irritably and starts dragging Arata along to the exit, “I’ll let the division officer know tomorrow morning, so you can come in late tomorrow. You’ll probably feel a lot better after some rest.”
“… I can take care of myself,” Arata grumbles, trying his best to stand on his own but failing each time he tries.
“I’m your handler…”
“You keep saying that. I’m not a test subject anymore, so you’re not my handler anymore.”
“I’m supposed to look after you,” Ryo insists and sighs. He presses the elevator button, silently praying it comes soon.
“… Then, why are you moving overseas when you like me, as if you think I wouldn’t mind?” Arata says and sighs deeply resting his hand on his knee as he breathes deeply, “You’re such a dumbass.”
“How…” Ryo starts but stops himself. He had worked so hard to control the image he portrayed to others. He gave it everything he had and yet, even after all that, Arata Kaizuke looked through his charade as if he never even tried in the first place. It made him sigh. So, as he stares at the blinking elevator lights, he schools his expression back into a blank, hoping it would bring back his sense of control, “What gave it away?”
“When you told me you’re transferring overseas,” Arata says and laughs awkwardly, breathing deeply as the world underneath him sways sharply, “I knew then.”
They stand awkwardly bent over as the elevator finally pings, doors opening a moment later.
“If you really didn’t care, you wouldn’t have bothered putting up such an elaborate charade in acting like I didn’t matter to you,” Arata explains as they enter the elevator. He leans back until he’s resting against the wall of the elevator.
The blonde doesn’t answer. He simply presses the ground-floor button, silently surveying his companion.
“If I really didn’t matter to you, you wouldn’t have felt the need to go overseas in order to not be near me…. ” Arata continues and finally groans as he sits on the floor. The elevator’s movement seeming to increase gravity on him. He rests his elbows on his knees, “That is… unless I pissed you off without knowing?”
Each ping of the elevator floors makes Ryo jump and he’s not even sure why. He swallows hard. He didn’t expect this. At all. He was trying to get away from Arata all this time so that he could just get rid of this one-sided crush he had. He didn’t consider the option, at all, that the brunette could possibly feel the same.
“Nah, I’m too cute for that,” Arata finally says with a laugh, taking the silence as affirmation that his theory was correct. The theory that Ryo did, definitely, like him as well. It energizes him a bit, the knowledge that's he's right. So, the brunette pushes himself up abruptly, only to feel his own legs crumble.
“Hell no,” Ryo snaps, grabbing hold of him and steadying him before he could fall.
“Huh… good,” Arata says, a tired grin appearing on his features, “So, you are paying attention.”
“… And you –too much,” Ryo mumbles and hoists the other male’s arm over his shoulder once more, “I wish you didn’t sometimes.”
“And what about this time… are you okay with this?” Arata asks, eyes forwards as they make their way through the lobby.
“… you’re such a heavyweight I’m actually reconsidering my choice now,” Ryo teases and hails a taxi once they’re out of the building, “Your fever is definitely increasing.”
“… you realise you tend to switch topics when you’re uncomfortable, right?”
“Let’s get you in the taxi… we don’t want to be late for the last train.”
“You’re doing it again. Switching topics.”
“Am I? We’ll have to work on that.”
This time, Arata’s the one who’s surprised and he can’t help but grin tiredly, “Sounds good…just… not today, okay?”
A smirk comes as a response, “Deal.”