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The picture wobbles a little at first, just a blur of white space and colors before it focuses on Frank. He’s lying on his back on white sheets, white pillows under his head. He is naked – or he is shirtless, his body disappears out of frame below the waist. One arm is stretched out to the side, his hand unseen. The other hand rests on his own chest, fingers moving restlessly.
He looks at the camera. He says, “What is this, Beautiful Agony? Put the fucking camera down and do me.”
Behind the camera, Gerard’s voice comes. “Not yet.”
Frank rolls his eyes. The outstretched arm folds into frame and he holds a cigarette to his lips, cheeks hollowing, then he exhales. The picture is obscured for a second.
Gerard says, “Oh, you do your own special effects too? Nice.”
Frank laughs. The smoke clears and Frank is grinning.
Gerard says, “Put your arm over your head.” Frank shifts, and Gerard says quickly, “Not the one with the cigarette, genius. The other one.”
Frank does as he’s asked, but then the picture wobbles crazily and Gerard’s hand comes into view, his fingers wrapping around Frank’s wrist and positioning it just so. Frank’s fingers flex a little, but Gerard withdraws his hand before they touch.
Gerard says, “Leave your other arm hanging off the bed.”
Frank’s shoulders are spread wide, now. The skin on the inside of the arm over his head is pale and unmarked. He shakes his head slightly. He looks directly into the camera, half a smirk clinging to his mouth.
The picture wobbles again, and when it steadies, more of Frank is visible; his belly, his hips, his thighs.
Gerard says, “Spread your legs a little for me.”
Frank raises an eyebrow and his stomach flexes as he lets his thighs fall further apart.
“A little more,” Gerard says quietly.
Frank does what he says. His cock is hard, lying against his belly. He keeps his eyes on the camera.
Gerard’s voice: “Look at you, Jesus. I oughta put you on the next cover, just like this. Cause a damn stampede.”
“I’m sure the label would love that,” says Frank. He brings his cigarette to his lips again; his cheeks hollow for longer this time. He squints at the butt while he breathes out, and Gerard’s hand comes into view to take it from him.
“I,” Gerard says archly, the camera swinging crazily to a non-descript patch of wall before settling back on Frank again, “am a Grammy-nominated Art Director, and the label will do what I fucking tell them.”
Frank rolls his eyes. He moves his empty hand around; settles it on his belly, grasps the sheets, scratches the side of his head.
Gerard says, “Let it hang off the bed like before.”
Frank extends his arm back out, and settles.
Gerard says, “You’re the camera guy, you know. Should really be you up here.”
“Naw,” Frank says. “But are you just gonna look at me all damn day, or what?”
“Would you let me?”
Frank makes a half-laugh sound. He shakes his head against the pillow, pushes his tongue into his cheek for a second. He’s not quite looking at the camera when he says, “Fuck you.”
Gerard makes a soft sound, and Frank’s eyes snap down, away from the camera. They widen and he looks quickly up again before his gaze is drawn back down.
He licks his lips. He says, “Gee.”
Gerard hums quietly, and there’s another sound, soft and slick, skin on skin. Gerard takes a deep, shuddery breath and lets it out slowly, a long, steady rush of air. The camera stays on Frank.
Frank’s fingers twitch on the pillow, but he doesn’t move. He sounds slightly strangled when he says, “Gee, fuck.”
“What?”
Frank rolls his eyes. “You know what. Let me do that, let me touch you.”
“But then you’d have to move,” Gerard points out. His breath hitches and Frank bites his own lip. Gerard breathes out, “So fuckin’ pretty, Frankie, could look at you for-fucking-ever like this.”
Frank’s hand has closed into a fist on the pillow. He is blushing, and his cock jerks stiffly against his belly.
Gerard says again, “Would you let me?”
“Yes,” Frank says, jaw clenched tight. “Yes. Fuck.”
Gerard makes a noise under his breath. He says, “Here,” and the picture is a wild blur for a few moments. When it clears, Gerard is in the frame, kneeling between Frank’s legs. He is naked and his cock is flushed; he folds down between Frank’s legs and smirks at the camera. “Hold it steady now,” he says, and dips down to touch his tongue to the head of Frank’s cock.
Frank hisses behind the camera, but the picture stays focused on Gerard. Gerard is holding himself up with his hands on Frank’s hips; his thumbs and fingers dig into Frank’s flesh, and he closes his lips around just the tip of Frank’s cock. His cheeks hollow now, and he looks up at the camera at the same time. Frank moans.
Gerard pulls off – the head of Frank’s cock is shiny and wet, and he lets it rub against his lower lip. He says, “Tell me how it feels,” before taking it back in again.
“It feels like you’re sucking my dick, what the fuck else,” Frank says roughly, and Gerard pulls off again, raising an eyebrow. Frank says, “Don’t, don’t stop, fuck.”
Gerard raises the other eyebrow and pulls back even further. He looks straight into the camera.
Frank whines, “I’ll tell you, all right, don’t stop.”
Gerard doesn’t move.
Frank says, “Fuck, fucking – fuck you, I’m sorry. All right? I’m sorry.”
Gerard watches him for a minute. Frank’s breathing is loud. Gerard says, “All right.” He lays an open-mouthed kiss on the head of Frank’s cock. “Tell me how it feels.”
Frank sighs when Gerard takes him back in; his hips flex against Gerard’s hands, a little. The muscles in his belly move. He says, “Feels – shit, Gerard, I don’t know, it feels good, it feels fucking good.”
Gerard sucks, lightly, his eyes on the camera. He makes an encouraging noise.
Frank’s thighs tremble visibly where they are splayed on either side of Gerard’s shoulders. He pants heavily. He says, “It’s like, I know it can be better, but you won’t yet, and that makes it, like, better than if you did, because I have to – and nobody else knows you can do this. I mean they know you do it, but they don’t know how good it is. I don’t know.”
Gerard’s lips slide a little further down, a little more of Frank’s cock disappears between them, and his eyelashes flutter.
“Fucking – I suck at putting it into words, Gerard, you know that, why do you always make me?” Frank pleads. Gerard pulls back slightly, and Frank hisses a breath, then blurts out, “It’s like a secret. It feels like a really fucking great secret.”
Gerard makes a muffled, pleased noise, and slides all the way down on Frank’s cock, his eyes on the camera until they slip closed at the last minute. Frank mewls blissfully, and for long minutes the only movement is Gerard’s head, his lips working around Frank’s cock, his fingers flexing on Frank’s hips.
Then he pulls off, slow, and Frank rushes out, “No – but I told you, Gee, I told you what it feels like,” and Gerard laughs, quietly, and kisses Frank’s hip.
“Give me the camera,” he says.
The picture tilts and whirls; when it settles, the view is from the side of the bed. Frank lies there propped up on his elbows, looking towards, but not at, the camera. The picture shifts slightly as the camera is adjusted, then Gerard comes back into frame, walking back towards the bed and reaching for Frank, even as Frank scrambles up and holds his hands out to Gerard.
Gerard pulls him close, both of them on their knees. They kiss deeply, Frank’s arms around Gerard’s neck. Gerard’s hands move over Frank’s back, then down to his hips. He pulls their bodies tighter together; thrusts against Frank and they both moan.
“Hands and knees,” Gerard says. Frank starts to turn around but Gerard stops him, and guides him so his back is facing the camera. “Like this,” he says, his hand between Frank’s shoulder blades.
Frank looks uncertainly over his shoulder; Gerard leans in and murmurs in his ear. The words are inaudible; his hand drops to Frank’s ass, cupping and squeezing, and Frank arches back into it a little. A few moments later, he nods, and lets Gerard push him down.
Gerard sits back on his heels and watches him thoughtfully. He runs his hands over Frank’s back, then looks down to the side, away from the camera, for a moment. When he lifts his hand towards Frank again, his fingers are shiny and wet; he rises back up on his knees and dips down to kiss the base of Frank’s spine. He pets Frank’s hip with his dry hand, then presses two fingers straight inside.
Frank makes a low, pained sound; he folds down onto his elbows. His cock hangs heavy between his legs, his face is pressed into the covers. Gerard stays close to him, brushes his lips and hand over Frank’s back. He leans up to watch his fingers working inside Frank, and smiles secretly at the camera.
“You’re incredible like this,” he says softly, his voice a low, steady murmur. “All spread out.”
Frank’s hips jerk. He makes a muffled noise.
Gerard kisses the dip between his shoulderblades. “Would you let anyone else look at you like this?”
“No,” Frank says immediately, turning his head so the word is clear.
Gerard touches his hair. His fingers twist and Frank moans, arching his back. Gerard says, “Good.”
Gerard works his fingers inside Frank for a long time, kissing his skin between murmured words. Frank starts shifting around; he whimpers and leans heavily on one arm, reaching between his legs with the other, but Gerard catches his hand before he can touch himself and Frank groans, “Gerard, please.”
“It’s okay,” Gerard tells him, planting his hand firmly back on the bed. He strokes up Frank’s arm, over his shoulder, rubs the back of his neck. He looks quickly at the camera. “Just a little longer, Frankie, you can take it.”
“I can’t,” Frank says, but he doesn’t try to move again. He presses his face back into the covers. His thighs shake.
Gerard strokes his back again, then slides his hand under Frank’s body and wraps it around his cock. Frank shouts and pushes into it, then back onto Gerard’s fingers. He rocks between them for a while, his hand clenching and unclenching in the covers.
After long moments, he says urgently, “Gee, I’m gonna come.”
“No, you’re not.” Gerard takes both of his hands away and Frank shivers visibly and makes a frustrated noise. Gerard watches him thoughtfully for a moment before guiding him back up onto his knees and around to face the camera.
Gerard moves around to kneel behind Frank, giving the camera a quick glance before pressing his lips to Frank’s shoulder. “I want to fuck you now.”
“Gee.” Frank turns his head, looking for a kiss. “Yeah, please.”
He starts to shift backwards when the kiss breaks, but Gerard stills him with a hand on his waist. Gerard’s hands are busy behind Frank: reaching first for a condom, then the bottle nearby.
“I’m gonna fall,” Frank says anxiously, as Gerard crowds up behind him on his knees.
“You won’t,” Gerard says, and pulls Frank’s arms back. “Hold on to me.”
“Gerard,” Frank frets. He has one arm wrapped backwards around Gerard’s waist and the other bent up to grip Gerard’s shoulder.
“I got you,” Gerard tells him, and holds Frank steady when he thrusts. His fingers dig in to Frank’s belly and chest, palms flat on Frank’s skin. “I got you, Frankie, trust me. Trust me, baby, I won’t let you fall.”
Frank makes a whimpering sound and his head falls back against Gerard’s shoulder. His throat works and he drags in huge breaths, chest rising and falling in time with the movement of their bodies. Gerard has one hand splayed against Frank’s belly; the other slides up to bracket the base of his throat, making Frank whine and arch up into it.
Gerard doesn’t look at the camera now; his eyes don’t leave Frank’s face. Frank’s eyes are closed as he pushes back against Gerard, moaning continuously now, his skin flushed and shiny with sweat. Gerard’s face is flushed and his mouth hangs open, but he makes no noise other than his quick, uneven breath.
For long minutes there is nothing else; Frank lost behind his own eyelids, and Gerard lost in Frank. When Gerard says, “Touch yourself for me,” Frank’s eyes fly open.
“I’ll fall if I let go.”
Gerard doesn’t stop moving. His teeth close on Frank’s ear. “Do you think I would let that happen to you?”
Frank makes a desperate noise, writhing in Gerard’s arms. “No. But-”
“Then do it.”
“I can’t.”
“You can.”
“I can’t.”
“I’ll decide what you can do,” Gerard says. He bites his lip suddenly and hides his face in Frank’s hair, rhythm stuttering before he goes on. “But I’m going to give you a choice, Frankie: you can make yourself come now, or you can not come at all tonight.”
“No, please-”
“It’s up to you,” Gerard says, ignoring him. “Quickly now.”
For a long moment Frank pants hopelessly at the ceiling, mouth working around a plea he doesn’t voice. Gerard is moving more quickly now, his grip on Frank tightening visibly, and then Frank screws his eyes up and lets go of Gerard’s waist, hand flying to wrap around his cock.
“Oh, good boy,” Gerard croons approvingly, and presses kisses to Frank’s throat. “Oh, Frankie, that’s it, baby, come for me now, let me hear you.”
Frank obeys instantly, back arching and curses dripping from his mouth, spilling over his fingers even as behind him Gerard shouts and goes still, grabbing hard at Frank’s hips with both hands. When they’re both still, Frank hanging loosely in Gerard’s grip with his eyes closed, Gerard pulls back slowly, easing Frank back to lie against the pillows, following to curl up close.
After a few moments Gerard pushes himself up. He says clearly to Frank, “I’m going to be right back. Okay?” and waits for Frank to nod before moving off the bed and out of frame. There is the sound of water running, and after a while Gerard appears again, this time holding a washcloth in his hand. He frowns in concentration as he wipes it over Frank’s skin, and bends down to kiss the newly clean places. Frank makes soft noises, his eyes barely open.
Gerard disappears for another moment, coming back with a glass of water. He sits on the bed and urges Frank up enough to drink some, then sets the glass on the floor. He climbs into the bed and Frank rolls over into his arms; Gerard lifts a blanket up and settles it over both of them.
There is movement under the blanket; occasionally Gerard’s fingertips are visible, cupping the back of Frank’s neck before petting down his spine again. Gerard is speaking, but the words are muffled and pitched only for Frank to hear. Now and then Frank says something in response.
There is the soft noise of kissing.
After a while, Frank rolls onto his back and Gerard follows, propping himself up on one elbow and looping the other arm around Frank’s chest.
Frank says, “Are you going to keep it?”
“It’s your tape,” Gerard says, stroking Frank’s shoulder. “It was your idea. You can do whatever you like with it.”
Frank scrunches his mouth. “Do you want to keep it, though?”
“Long enough to watch it back a few times, at least.”
“What if someone steals it?” Frank says, smiling when Gerard snorts. “Sells it to MTV? Hey, man, it happens.”
“I think you’re wildly overestimating our celebrity,” Gerard says, making Frank laugh and shake his head. Gerard touches his chin. “Will it make you anxious to know it exists?”
Frank shrugs a little awkwardly. He says, “I just don’t want anyone else to see it, you know?”
“Neither do I,” Gerard agrees. “We can bury it in the computer. Make it so only we know how to find it.”
Frank makes a face and stretches towards the camera a little. When his hand comes back into frame he is holding a pack of cigarettes. He lights two and hands one to Gerard. “So only you know how to find it, you mean.”
Gerard takes a drag, exhales, then kisses the corner of Frank’s mouth. “I should let you do it? Wake up to you accidentally emailing it to everyone we know?”
“Shut the fuck up, I’m not that bad.”
Gerard laughs. He leans down and kisses Frank briefly. “You don’t have to decide right now. It’s up to you, okay?”
Frank hums quietly. He touches Gerard’s face.
Gerard catches Frank’s fingertip in his teeth for a moment. “I can’t wait to watch it with you. Can’t wait for you to see yourself like that. You’re so fucking amazing.”
“So you always say.”
“It’s always true.”
“Ugh.” Frank rolls his eyes and blows a plume of smoke at the ceiling. “Trust you to get all Hallmark over a fucking sex tape.”
“You love it,” Gerard says comfortably. He takes a deep drag on his smoke and holds it for a second, then exhales luxuriously. “I’m gonna check the recording.”
“Okay.”
Gerard gets out of bed and comes towards the camera. He crouches down, squints just left of the lens for a minute, then reaches forwards with his hands.
The screen goes black.