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“You’re quiet,” he observes after some time. “What’s the matter?”
Ginny doesn’t move. “Does something have to be the matter for me to be quiet?”
He kisses the top of her head. “Usually.”
She closes her eyes and exhales slowly, holding him tighter still. She is not quite used to feeling this much at once, but who can blame her? For one thing, Harry Potter is in her bed. For another, he is a little bit more than half-naked.
The happiness trying to flutter in her chest feels wrong, tainted with grief, twisted with a lot of fears she had been holding down for the past year. She did not know whether she would ever see Harry again, no less be in such a compromising position with him in her home, unusually uninterrupted. Reuniting with him today, alone, finally, felt too good to be true.
But it was only a week ago that she had seen him dead in Hagrid’s arms. Or so she thought. Losing Tonks and Remus was enough. Losing Fred was agonizing beyond words. She could only take so much.
“I’m listening,” she finally responds.
“To what?”
“Your heartbeat.”
Harry does not reply, rather he begins running his fingers through her hair as she presses her ear more firmly against his bare chest.
She continues to listen to it, loud and steady, for another minute or so, before lifting her head up and looking at him. “For someone who temporarily died, seems to be working pretty well.”
Harry attempts a grin that comes off more like a sad grimace. “Glad to hear.”
“Me too,” she says as she puts her hand over his heart and moves her face into the crook of his neck, nuzzling into him, breathing in his scent. “Why so somber? It’s a good thing.”
She feels him shake his head. “I know it is. I just…remembered something.”
“What?”
“Your scream,” he almost whispers. “When…Hagrid was carrying me.”
There is a long pause. “Oh.”
“It was awful.”
“So was seeing you like that.”
And she curses herself as a tear leaves her eye without her permission, falling onto Harry’s skin.
While still holding onto her, he adjusts their position so they’re sitting up and looking at one another. “Ginny…” He wipes another tear rolling down her cheek with his thumb.
“Sorry,” she says quickly, using the back of her hand to wipe her eye.
“You don’t have to apologize,” he tells her. “I should be the one apologizing.”
“What for?” she asks, confused. “You did nothing wrong.”
“I know, but-“
“I mean, that’s an understatement,” she interrupts. “You sacrificed yourself for all of us…” she puts her hand over his chest again, feeling his heart thump against his ribs. “The only person to survive the killing curse not only once, but twice. I’m glad I’ve got you in my bed, because if you were a hot commodity after the first time, just imagine what it’s going to be like now…the Veela will just be lining up…”
Harry shakes his head, actually smiling this time. “Alright, let’s get this out of the way first.” He tightens his grasp on her hip and holds her hand on his chest. “No need for a Veela when I have you. That is, if you’ll still take me.”
“I think our recent activities are substantial proof that I will, in fact, still take you.”
“Good. Thank you,” Harry beams, leaning in and kissing her hard. The feel of his lips against hers gives her stomach a joyful jolt. She indulges for a bit, but her brain nags her, telling her that she still needs to make sure.
She pulls away reluctantly. “So…there were no excursions with any Veela or anyone else while you were hunting…what did you call them?”
“Horcruxes,” he tells her. “And no, of course not. I was with Ron and Hermione the whole time. I thought about you constantly. And I really meant it when I said I missed you before, when we- you know- were still fully clothed.”
She can tell he’s being truthful, and cannot stop her lips from lifting up, teeth bearing. “Me too,” she says. “I missed you so much. I was always so worried. I mean, I believed in you of course, so a big part of me knew in my heart you’d be okay, but…” she trails off, face falling again.
Harry squeezes the hand he is holding. “That’s what I want to apologize for…you were so in the dark. You didn’t know where I was, if I was all right, what I was doing… I at least could see that you were okay and safe at school on the map-“
“You…you checked?” she asks in surprise.
He nods, a blush creeping up his neck. “It made me miss you more sometimes, but also made me feel a lot better knowing you were doing relatively okay under the circumstances. And you didn’t have that same security with me.”
She bites her lip. “I mean, that’s not your fault. You had to be secretive to stay alive. I understand that.”
Harry sighs, rubbing her back gently. “I’m sure you want an explanation for everything, though. I think I would.”
Ginny knows that this is difficult for him, being vulnerable. She pulls her arm stuck between their two bodies out to bring her hand to his cheek, caressing his face. He leans into her touch and closes his eyes as she says, “Sure, but there’s no rush, Harry. We have plenty of time, now.”
He grins gratefully. “Yeah, we do.” He doesn’t even open his eyes, just leans forward and kisses her. And although she’s the one who just pointed out that they have time, she suddenly feels like she needs to make up for all of it that had been lost over the past year, and throws herself into the kiss eagerly, inviting his tongue into her mouth, pulling his face as close as she can to her own. Harry lets out a low moan as their tongues meet, as she presses herself tighter against him.
After a minute or so, he tears his mouth away and moves back a bit from her. Before she can even question him, he grabs her hand that is in his hair, and places it up against his heart. “Beating pretty fast, isn’t it?”
She nods wordlessly as she feels it pulse rapidly against her palm.
“It’s all yours. If it ever stops beating, it’s because you will have caused it to short circuit.”
She laughs lightly, rolling her eyes at him. “You flatter me.”
“I’ll risk it, though,” he smirks before swooping back in. She smiles against him, and she and Harry continue to rediscover one another, entangled together. And despite all the grief weighing down on her, knowing Harry is entrusting her with his heart helps her permit her own to lift a bit.