Chapter Text
<Illustration by Tomowowowo; Click for more of her art!>
"I'm not sure about this."
"I know you aren’t, buddy." Zack sat across from his friend, one of his legs bent to prop his arm, his other leg outstretched. Before him, Sephiroth sat neat and stiff, eyes focused on the distance. Light fingers skimmed through his hair and Sephiroth twitched at the touch.
"He's not going to like it." Sephiroth said, trying to keep his voice flat and even.
"We'll be right here if things go wrong." Aerith promised from behind him. Her fingers were busy twining fragrant flowers into the length of his hair.
"Waiting to drag me out of my own corpse again?" Sephiroth suggested flatly.
"I know you're anxious," Zack said, reaching out to place one of his hands over his friend's. "Cloudy's not going to kill you. Our Spike just knew better than to accept any fakes or substitutes. It'll be the real you this time."
"It felt enough like me before." Sephiroth sighed. "Even if he doesn't kill me, they'll lock me up. And so long as they kept me alive, not even you could touch me."
"I don't think they will." Aerith offered, carding her fingers through Sephiroth's hair. "This is the best chance we're going to get, Sephiroth."
"That's what the flowers are for, y'know?" Zack added, his finger tapping on the back of Sephiroth's hand. He'd stuck close ever since they'd made the decision, keeping in contact. "A sign of approval. Cloud'll understand. I mean, a sticky note would be helpful for clarity's sake, but I don't think Aerith can make those, so flowers it is. You can do this, Sephiroth. So can he."
"I've never been good at people," Sephiroth shifted his hand under Zack's, but not to pull away. He just curled his fingers around the twitchy Soldier's hand.
"Neither has Cloud," Aerith hummed, drawing a chuckle from Zack.
"I've made his life miserable. In many ways. Now he's getting back to living, and I'm about to make it difficult again. It's hardly fair to him."
"You made his life wonderful once too." Zack offered, squeezing Sephiroth's hand. "I was there for that bit. I remember how much you two meant to each other, Sephiroth. Maybe that can be true again. Maybe you can help one another."
"I don't know." Sephiroth could feel his jaw clenching. It wasn't until Aerith leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him that he realized he'd been showing his stress so openly.
"Hojo is dead," Aerith whispered. "And with you human, you will be beyond Jenova's reach. This isn't just about joy and the future. It's about the planet too, and about your safety and his. The only way to stop her from dragging you back to life is to send you back ourselves. Remember? We talked about this."
"And you can't go through that again, Seph." Zack whispered, squeezing the hand he was holding. "It already got close to breaking you."
"Maybe it would be better for me to break." Sephiroth whispered. "If my only other option is to be a burden."
"Don't be afraid," Aerith whispered, holding him from behind as though he were a child in need of comforting. He did not object.
"We're with you," Zack promised. "And I know you, Seph. You've always been the best person you could be. You have a better chance now than ever. I think you'll find more allies than you think once everyone calms down."
"I have to agree." Aerith murmured from behind him. "Avalanche will like you just fine. Once they figure out how to read that little scowl of yours, that is."
"They're heroes." Sephiroth said, his voice flat. "And I am the boogyman."
"None of them are innocent or perfect either." Zack argued, shaking his head at Sephiroth's pessimism.
"Point is, they're like you, Sephiroth." Aerith said, squeezing Sephiroth in silent affection. "All of them. They're warriors who have made hard choices and terrible decisions. They just ended up together on the right side of history. Be gentle with them, be honest, and things will work out."
"Tifa will have the hardest time," Zack cautioned. "Aside from Cloud. But she knows a thing or two about hurting people, and about mistakes. She'll give you a chance to prove yourself. For Aerith's sake, at least. They were best friends, after all."
"You and best friends," Sephiroth sighed. "That designation seems to mean a great deal to you."
"Well of course," Zack chuckled. "You and Cloud are mine. And I've forgiven you a lot."
"You did." Sephiroth couldn't argue the point. He hadn't expected to be lifted to the lifestream at all, much less by Zack's own hands.
"Cloud will too." Zack crossed his arms and gave a firm nod of conviction.
"We'll see." Sephiroth whispered.
"It's time," Aerith pulled away from her hug around Sephiroth's shoulders. "Lie back, Sephiroth. And hold these, alright? Now just breathe.”
He curled his fingers around the flower stems Aerith pressed into his hands, and leaned back. He was not surprised to feel the earth give beneath him, rippling like water. He tensed for a moment, afraid to drown. Then Zack’s hand was there on the back of his neck, holding him, supporting him.
“That's right,” Aerith murmured as the light got brighter behind her. Her fingertips she brushed over Sephiroth’s eyelids, urging them to close. He could still see the afterimage of her seared into his eyelids by the brightness.
He was falling. Sinking. But Zack’s hand was there, and the flower stems were solid in his hands. He pulled in a breath, then another as his heart got heavier—as the water that had been ground rose around him. The warm pool lapped at his cheeks and body where he floated, as if it were hungry.
“Keep breathing.” Aerith’s voice whispered, so far away now. Zack’s hand was gentle, steady, keeping Sephiroth afloat. “Slow and deep. Just breathe…"
The phone rang piercing and shrill. Tifa sighed where she was fixing up her bar. It was too early for there to be any customers in 7th Heaven, but it seemed the delivery business never rested. She shook her head as it rang again, and cast her glance to Cloud. He was sitting unmoved at the bar, glaring at the staircase.
"Are you going to answer that?" She asked. "You're here this time, so I'm not going to play secretary for you anymore."
Cloud looked back at her, a confused, disturbed look on his face.
"Tifa," He said, slowly, "I don't think it's for me."
"Got it!" Marlene called from upstairs. Thundering footsteps sounded above them as she and Denzel raced into the office.
"Not for you?" Tifa asked, crossing her arms.
"They hear better." Cloud said with a small shrug, lifting his chin towards the children upstairs. "Wonder if it's 'cause they're closer to the ground."
"Mystical stuff again?" Tifa dropped her arms to her hips, cocking her head to the side. "Well. Want to grab a drink before they relay the message?"
"I'll pass," Cloud chuckled, brightening at Tifa's playful offer. "Last time it wasn't anything too bad."
"No," Tifa hummed. "The last time, it was to call us all to the church for your wakeup call."
"Like I said, not so bad." Cloud said, a half-smile on his face.
"Well," Tifa looked over, answering his smile with her own. "It did end up with me losing a few days of business."
"Cloud!" Marlene called as she ran down the stairs, her voice lilted in sing-song. "We have to go to the church!"
"Did you tell Aerith hi for us?" Cloud asked, swinging off the bar stool.
"'Course I did!" Marlene replied, throwing a hand in the air in triumph. It was a motion almost exactly like Barret's victory stance.
"Can we come to the church with you?" Denzel asked, eager and anxious at once. "She said you might need backup."
"If he needs backup, let's make it a family outing." Tifa replied before Cloud could. "Too bad Barret's out with his survey crew. He always misses the most interesting picnics."
"Well," Cloud sighed. "I guess I'm not taking my bike then. Couldn't fit all three of you. Let's mosey."
Denzel cheered, jumping in enthusiasm. Tifa lifted a hand to cover her smile, her eyes narrowing in delight at the old turn of phrase. Marlene sprinted back upstairs.
"I'll get a towel!" She cried, "Last time we all got soaked!"
"Did she say what this was, Denzel?" Tifa asked as she rounded the bar.
"Nah, she was pretty vague about it." Denzel shrugged, shifting in place.
"That's Aerith for you," Tifa sighed.
She started to flip the sign on 7th Heaven's door to read 'closed.' Then she tisked, pulling it off the nail it hung from and frowning at it. Cloud narrowed his eyes, trying to read over her shoulder, and snorted. Someone had scrawled 'for Terrorist business' under the word 'closed.'
"Turks," Tifa sighed, putting the closed sign up none the less. "They all think they're hilarious."
"I have the towel," Marlene announced, jumping down the last step to trot up beside Denzel.
"Alright then," Cloud ruffled Denzel's hair and moved to the door with a steady, easy stride. "Let's go see who fell through the roof this time."
The drive back to the ruins of Midgar took time. It would have been faster on the motorcycle, but Cloud enjoyed the company enough not to worry. The kids talked behind him and Tifa, sharing their memories of the city. They wondered aloud what they would find there this time, and whispered about the voice on the phone.
"How did she sound?" Tifa asked, glancing back at the kids.
She took the exit towards Midgar a little fast and Cloud gripped the handle on the inside of the car door. He cast Tifa a brief look, and got an amused one in return. He had to remind himself that this woman had driven a getaway vehicle like a bat out of hell away from Shinra. He cleared his throat, and thanked his lucky stars that the mako had gotten rid of most of his motion sickness.
"She seemed kinda excited," Marlene supplied, bouncing in her seat. Her favorite beach towel was folded in her lap, and she was plucking at the corner.
"And she was laughing a little," Denzel confirmed, his arms crossed as he lounged back in the seat. Cloud recognized the pose as one he himself often struck, and glanced away with a secret smile.
"Well, she always did have a sense of humor on her," Tifa slowed down as they pulled into the streets of the old city. "The only question is whether that was one of her sweet laughs, or if this is another Wall Market Moment."
"Not in front of the kids," Cloud scolded under his breath.
The ruins were hard to navigate in the truck. When they ran out of usable road, they got out of the car to walk the rest of the way together. Marlene held onto Tifa's hand, keeping an eye out among the ruins for monsters. Denzel kept hold of the staff that Cloud had gotten him for his last birthday after the remnant attack, and twirled it now and then. He was getting pretty good with it recently.
"You three let me go first, okay?" Cloud said when they reached the church. "Just in case."
"In case you forgot to pack anything up when you moved back home?" Marlene teased.
"In case anything goes wrong," Cloud objected, though he cast her a little smile. "I didn't bring much in the first place, Marlene."
"Go ahead," Tifa said, nodding to broken door. "We'll take rear guard."
It was strangely nostalgic to step into the broken church. Cloud had kept his stride easy up the steps, not letting himself hurry or turn away. Back when he'd slept here, he'd only stayed a week or two sleeping by Aerith's flowers. It had been a small comfort as he tried to find his way through the stigma and failure.
It was a place full of memories. Spending his first afternoon with Aerith dropping barrels on troopers and turks. Coming 'home' to find the church in ruins and Tifa unconscious. Waking up floating in the hands of the children he'd thought he'd failed to save...
It still left him breathless sometimes that they had lived—that Denzel had lived.
He slipped inside the broken door, casting it a regretful look. He had meant to do some repair work on the old place after Kadaj tore it apart. But like the Forgotten City itself, the church seemed to be somehow beyond him. It left Cloud hesitant to interfere. He glanced briefly at the broken pews before turning his eyes to the pool.
His breath froze in his lungs, and he went still.
Dark hair, head tilted down, a faint smile on his lips, Zack stood in the water. There was a look of utter tenderness about him. Whatever he was cradling in the water, it was something precious.
Cloud took a half-step forward, the fall of his boot sounding immense in the quiet air of the church. Zack lifted his head at the sound of it, turning towards Cloud. His bright eyes shone, and his smile warmed in genuine affection. He drew his hands out of the water without so much as a ripple and gave Cloud a small, jaunty wave.
Then he was gone, as though he had never stood there.
Cloud remembered after a moment to take a breath. His breath was echoed by one that was not his own. Cloud's heart skipped a beat. The pool… Zack had been holding something. Or someone?
He moved forward, itching for his sword. It was a bad habit, he thought to himself, to feel naked without his sword strapped to his back. At least he had the nail bat in the truck for emergencies. The air was peaceful despite his anxiety, full of the scent of flowers. The Buster sword gleamed in its new place at the top of the pool. The flowers blooming around it reflected in its surface. As did something else. Something in the pool—something large and… Human?
Cloud launched forward abruptly. Had Zack been holding someone's head above that water? Was he supposed to take over and fish them out? To step in for Zack and be the hero on the other side of this pool from the lifestream it seemed to connect to? And did this mean the church had become a point like Mideel, where hapless beings would wash out of the lifestream?
He stopped at the edge of the pool just as sharply as he'd launched towards it. He stared without recognition at first. Then he stared and wished he did not recognize.
The man floating in the sacred pool was still above the water. Small ripples lapped around his cheeks and shoulders and body. Pale skin glistened, wet and shapely and perfect. Perfect, and wrong—beautiful, and terrible.
Sephiroth took another soft breath between parted lips, bobbing higher in the water. His hair fanned out behind and below him. Lilies and flower petals were twined into his hair—a tapestry of silver, yellow and white. His elegant, murderous hands rested peacefully across his chest. His hands were curled around the stem of long flowers. The blooms were identical to those that Aerith had raised within the church for so many years.
Cloud forced his eyes to Sephiroth's face, and felt his chest tighten. That rush of fear. That drop at the very core of him where destiny and battle and death twisted. That rage burning inside. And below them all, a yearning. And that yearning was more painful by far than the rest combined. Sephiroth's silver brows were furrowed. His parted lips managed to make even him look vulnerable. His long neck was as bare and open as the rest of him. Even his piercing eyes were shut. He looked almost peaceful. Cloud frowned. He did not look dead, which was what he should be.
Then there was a shift. A whisper of movement set the water in motion, and dark eyelashes fluttered. Cloud was transfixed, standing on the edge of the water unmoving.
Sephiroth's eyes flickered open, squinting in the light. Then he blinked, and his gaze focused on Cloud. Sephiroth breathed out slowly. He was obviously aware, but in the same way someone on the edge of sleep might be—not quite connected to reality yet. Cloud watched Sephiroth's round, human pupils dilate and contract as he tried to adjust to the light, and choked back a scream.
"Cloud?" Tifa's voice called from outside. "Is everything okay?"
"No," Cloud responded, breathless, shaking his head at the sight of Sephiroth. He reached for his blade, but it was not there. He opened his mouth to call for his nail bat—Tifa would bring it and her fists without question and maybe, just maybe, the two of them could even the odds—
But...
But human eyes. Green and bloodshot and confused, trying to focus on him. Those soft lips moving, as though trying to form a word. Then Sephiroth seemed to blink the rest of the way into awareness. His brows furrowed deeply in sudden confusion, and his body went stiff.
Whatever spell had held him above the water vanished. He dropped under the surface with an abrupt sound of surprise.
Cloud lunged after him before his brain had a chance to catch up. He jumped into the water with a heavy splash, catching Sephiroth's squirming naked body. He hooked his elbows under both arms to haul Sephiroth above the surface. He didn't even question his impulse until Sephiroth was choking out mouthfulls of water and gasping for air.
Footsteps pounded, and Cloud looked up to see Tifa stop at the water's edge, fists lifted to assist. Her lips parted in surprise, then slimmed into an angry line. The kids hung back, but Cloud could see them in the doorway, Denzel with his fist tight around his staff. Marlene had her fists up like Tifa's, her eyes full of worried intensity.
Cloud would have dropped Sephiroth, but the man wasn't… right, somehow. Dangerous and terrifying as he was, Sephiroth couldn't seem to find his footing. He just drooped there, limp in Cloud's arms, choking and breathing as though it was the only thing on his mind.
His mind—!
Cloud searched for the deadly, dangerous pull on his own psyche, and felt… Nothing. No pull from Sephiroth. No call of like to like from the Jenova cells. Not even a flare of mako next to its kin. He shifted, wrapping one arm around Sephiroth's chest to hold him. He caught Sephiroth's chin in his freed hand and turned the gasping man's head.
His eyes were definitely still green, yes. But darker. Less acid. Pupils rounded with humanity and hazed with confusion and… fear?
"He's human." Cloud said, his voice sounding flat with shock over the ripples of water. He looked to Tifa, his expession questing—confused.
"Cloud," Sephiroth whispered, and it was a whisper. A small and soft and worried noise. Cloud could not remember ever hearing him whisper before.
For a moment, Tifa’s fists clenched. Cloud could hear the leather of her gloves creaking. Sephiroth trembled under his hands, and Cloud realized belatedly that he'd moved his free hand to the man's neck. He wasn't sure if it was in comfort or threat. He watched the rage in Tifa's eyes, waiting for her verdict. The flowers in Sephiroth's hands and hair had made up Cloud's mind before he'd even had a chance to wonder. But Sephiroth had hurt Tifa as much as Cloud or more.
Finally, Tifa let out a hiss of breath through her teeth and clenched her eyes shut.
"Gods damn it, Aerith," She whispered vehemently. "Get him out of the water, Cloud. It's freezing and his lips are turning blue."
"You're sure?" Cloud asked, feeling the man's head lolling even as he asked. He shifted his grip on Sephiroth's wet body as he shivered and drooped, still breathing too hard.
Tifa pursed her lips, then let out a heavy sigh, dropping her head in a nod.
"Tifa? " Marlene called from the door. "What is it? Is it a monster?"
"Go fetch the towel please, Marlene," Tifa replied. "We've gotta warm our guest up, then we'll figure out what we've got on our hands."
"Behave," Cloud warned, his hands tightening in warning on Sephiroth's body.
The eyes that met his were… hazy. Weak. Harmless. He found himself hitching Sephiroth up instead of threatening him further. He wrapped one of Sephiroth's arms over his shoulders.
"Come on," he muttered. "Try to get your feet under yourself. One step at a time."
Sephiroth wavered beside him, almost drunkenly. He was shivering, his body cold and slick. Flower petals stuck to his skin from where he'd fallen into the water. The hand that wasn't over Cloud's shoulder was still clinging to the flower stem.
"I feel…" Sephiroth rasped, the thought seeming to disappear as soon as it began to leave his mouth. He stumbled, and Cloud staggered to the side trying to support him. Human or not, he was still very tall.
"Don't think he can climb out on his own," Cloud commented, glancing up to Tifa.
"You push, I'll pull?" She offered, propping her fists on her hips.
Cloud glanced down in the water behind himself and averted his eyes with a blush from the crystal clear view of Sephiroth's admittedly perfect ass.
"Better get the towel from Marlene first." He said, trying to sound calmer than he felt. “And maybe send her out to wait by the car with Denzel.”
Cloud led Sephiroth closer to the edge of the pool while Tifa jogged off to wrangle the children. The man seemed half-frozen, his teeth chattering. His long hair floated behind him like a frozen stand of reeds, the flower petals still twined into its mass. Cloud towed him towards the edge, forging through the chilled water. He wondered how much of Sephiroth's shaking was the cold water, and how much was the strain of being reborn.
“I don’t suppose you want to explain what the hell’s going on.” He said dryly as he came to a stop at the shallower edge of the water, by the splintered, broken floor.
“Mmm.” Sephiroth teeth were chattering, and he seemed to be having a hard time keeping his head up, but he looked to Cloud out of the corner of his eyes. “Mostly Zack.”
“Yeah,” Cloud sighed. “I figured that part.”
It took some doing to get him out of the water. He was as pliant as a rag-doll, and almost as useless. Tifa and Cloud had to do most of the work, and there was more than a little awkward grappling with Sephiroth’s wet, half-frozen body. If nothing else, it seemed to steady Tifa’s nerves to watch the reborn ex-general flop on the wooden floor like a landed fish and lie there gasping.
“So you’re really human, huh?” Tifa asked, pulling the towel off her shoulder and dropping it on Sephiroth with a move that she tried to make look careless. Cloud knew her well enough to notice her careful aim. She'd made sure Sephiroth would manage to get the towel in hand. He didn’t call her on the small kindness.
“So it seems,” Sephiroth fumbled with the towel, trying to appear aloof. He just looking a little more hapless because of it. “Is it always this bad?”
“Being human? Considering it’s you asking, I almost hope so,” Tifa replied, her arms crossed. “Don’t expect me to trust you.”
“I don’t,” Sephiroth replied with a wheeze. “Just to trust her.”
He didn’t have to clarify. Tifa and Cloud were both looking at the flower Sephiroth was still holding tight in one hand. When Tifa reached down to pluck it from his fingers, he didn’t resist.
“I would love to trust her,” Tifa said, softly. “But you killed her too. I’m going to go call Avalanche. We’ll need to talk about this.”
“I’ve got an eye on him.” Cloud assured, lifting his chin towards the worried children’s faces peering in the door. “Just call when you’re ready.”
For a moment, it was silent as Tifa ushered the kids away. Sephiroth struggled up from where he was collapsed till he could curl in on himself. He sat with his knees to his chest, clumsily wrapping Marlene's pastel beach towel around his shoulders. Cloud watched him shaking—watched the way his eyes, still distant, glanced around the church.
“Why you?” Cloud asked after a moment. “If they could send someone back, why not Zack? Or Aerith?”
“They are happy.” Sephiroth said, weakly, his voice a little steadier, but still soft and small and underlied by the chattering of teeth. “And it is part of a plan.”
“Care to explain?”
“To use Aerith’s words,” He paused, sucking in a breath and clearing his throat. “Jenova is in time out. And they are taking her favorite chew toy.”
Cloud blinked slowly at him, then let out a huff of breath.
“Which is you.” He elaborated.
“Which is me.” Sephiroth agreed.
“And you’re okay with this.” Cloud said. “What makes you think I won’t just tie you up and torture you? Take revenge for all the hurt you’ve caused?”
“I know you, Cloud,” Sephiroth lifted his eyes to Cloud, still trembling. “I accept that you may choose to kill me. But you are no torturer.”
“Just because I was your puppet, don’t think you know me.” Cloud hissed, feeling his mako rising. Sephiroth didn’t even flinch.
“That’s not what I meant. If anyone understands what it is to be puppeted…" Sephiroth trailed off, then glanced away. "I would never throw that in your face.”
Cloud let out a puff of breath and moved forward, closer to Sephiroth, crouching at his side.
“You’ll hardly be able to explain if you’re frozen to death." Cloud muttered in explanation before sliding his hand behind Sephiroth’s neck. He pulled free the heavy sopping wet hair plastered to Sephiroth's back. Some piece of him screamed in triumph at touching the mass of hair, but he tried to ignore it. Sephiroth shivered, but did not object. “We can wait till Avalanche is all here to get the full story.”
“Apologies for this,” Sephiroth whispered, curling in tighter on himself. His hands clenched on the join of the towel over his chest. “I did object on your behalf, but they insisted.”
“Just shut it,” Cloud sighed, laying the hair gently behind Sephiroth. “Breathe and warm up.”
Sephiroth appeared to take Cloud’s order to mean ‘breathe and pass out.' Within a few moments, Cloud had to catch him to keep him from braining himself on the floor. He tried to rouse Sephiroth when Tifa called them to leave, but only managed to rouse the exhausted man into a torpid sort of half-awareness. Cloud practically carried him to the truck.
He rode in the back with Sephiroth, leaving Marlene, Denzel and Tifa a cushion of distance. Cloud kept an arm around Sephiroth out of necessity, holding him in place in the bouncing truck. It was miserable, but some little part of him took comfort in the way the unconscious man turned into his shoulder and pressed against his warmth. The soft puffs of his breath against Cloud’s neck were unnervingly intimate and vulnerable.
Cloud placed a threatening hand over Sephiroth’s throat again as they rode, testing. He frowned a little when he found that the man only tilted into the touch. There was not a shred of violence or anger in the reaction. It was getting hard to think this was a trick. And from the fact that Tifa was wearing Aerith’s flower behind her ear as she drove, he knew she felt the same way.
One thing was for certain, Cloud thought with a sigh as the frozen and very naked Sephiroth pressed against him for heat. His life was never going to be boring.