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Cullen’s eyes ached as he picked up another report to read. He hadn’t been prepared for the sheer amount of paperwork required as the Commander of the Inquisition’s Forces. At least it kept him occupied when all he wanted to do was find the Inquisitor.
Late that afternoon, Aria had returned from a two-week mission to Crestwood and Skyhold was abuzz with the news that she’d killed another high dragon.
Maker preserve him. The thought of her fighting one of those massive creatures just added fuel to the fire that was his nightmares.
Not that he would ever tell her that. He was proud of her; and he would never question her ability to do what was necessary for the Inquisition. He would support her, even though he really wanted to lock her up here where he could keep her safe. And he would not grab her as soon as she returned from each mission and keep her to himself until it was time for her to leave again. He had more control than that…didn’t he?
Cullen scrubbed his hands over his face and picked up the report he hadn’t really been reading when he heard someone fumbling at the latch to his office door. A moment later the Inquisitor stumbled into the room. She righted herself, smoothed her hands down her tunic, and turned to him.
“Commander.”
He hesitated. “Inquisitor,” he replied slowly. “Are you… Is something wrong?” He moved around his desk.
“I’m celebur…celabrut…celebrating,” she said with an emphatic nod, almost losing her balance. “With Bull.”
“I see.”
“I killed a dragon,” she declared walking unsteadily toward him. “I think that deserves a cele…something.” She continued with a wave of her hand.
“Indeed it does.” Cullen discovered he found an inebriated Inquisitor absolutely delightful.
Aria stopped a handsbreadth from him and poked him in the chest, hard. “I think that deserves a kiss from my Commander!”
“You have but to ask, my dear,” he growled reaching for her, only to stop, stunned, as she looked up at him with tears in her beautiful blue eyes.
“B..but, I don’t want to ask,” she said brokenly. “I always have to ask. I don’t think you really want to kiss me.” She ended on a wail, tears now streaming down her face.
Cullen pulled her into his arms, her sobs breaking his heart.
Is that what she thought? That he didn’t want to kiss her? He always wanted to kiss her.
It took all his control to focus at the War Table while watching her nibble her lower lip when she concentrated. And no Templar should have the kinds of thoughts he had while watching her render judgement from the Inquisitor’s throne. Maker help him, he couldn’t watch her walk across the courtyard without worrying he might embarrass himself with his reaction.
How could she think…?
Then thinking back, he realized she was right. He was so focused on maintaining his control, that he had unwittingly forced her to seek him out. From the very beginning, she was the one with the courage to reach out, to make herself vulnerable.
He reached down, scooped her up, and returned to his chair where he sat cradling her in his arms.
“Aria, I’m so sorry.”
“I know,” she sighed into his chest. “You don’t want to hurt my feelings.”
“That’s not it at all,” he protested
“I miss you when I’m gone,” she mumbled sleepily. “And I dream about you all the time. I’m pitiful.”
“No love…” Cullen began, his own eyes filling with tears now.
“I just wish…”
He barely heard her, but when she didn’t finish, he realized she had fallen asleep. He held her closer and kissed the top of her head.
Cullen spent the next few hours holding the Inquisitor as she slept, and planning the most important campaign of his life. The campaign to ensure his Inquisitor never again had reason to doubt his feelings for her.