Chapter Text
A small gust of air drifted into the library, flipping the pages of Dimitri’s book back to the start.
The prince sighed as he looked up from the text. It was well past midnight, and most of the monastery had gone to bed hours ago. The library was dead quiet, save only Dimitri leafing through the various books he had pulled from the shelves. Arundel. Flayn’s disappearance. There was something that didn’t sit right with him. But no matter how much he searched, he couldn’t find the answers he was looking for. What was he missing? What was the string that tied this all together?
The answers alluded him, and now it seemed the books themselves were working against him. Where had that draft come from anyways?
Someone cleared their throat behind him, and Dimitri froze.
Gingerly, he turned around to find Byleth standing tall with her arms crossed. Though her stance was menacing, her expression was impassive as usual.
“Professor,” Dimitri stuttered out in greeting and immediately slammed his book closed. He awkwardly stood up from his seat, shoving the book behind him in hopes of hiding its cover. “I didn’t hear you come in.”
How had she managed to sneak in here like that? Besides the small gust of air, Dimitri hadn’t noticed a thing – no footsteps, no creaking of the old wooden floor. Yet here she was, standing before him.
“You’re up awfully late,” she replied flatly. “Again.”
Unsure how to react, Dimitri smiled nervously. “I suppose I have had some trouble sleeping of late.”
“So I’ve noticed.”
Byleth hadn’t moved a muscle this entire time, nor had she broken eye contact. Dimitri swallowed. She was right, of course. She and Dedue had caught him here a few nights back. Perhaps he should have waited a little longer before coming back to the library so late at night.
“Lack of sleep affects your training, you know,” Byleth continued. “You’ve been sluggish. And your reflexes are dulling. Without proper rest, you’ll become useless on the battlefield.”
Dimitri placed a hand over his chest and bowed. “I’m very sorry. You are right. I will return to my room at once.”
He picked up his books and placed them back on the shelf. Though Byleth slowly lowered her arms, she didn’t move from her spot. Once the books were put away, the prince nodded to the professor and walked towards the exit.
“Dimitri,” Byleth called out.
He paused, and turned back around. “Yes Professor?”
For just a brief moment, Byleth’s emotionless face dropped and Dimitri could see a flicker of worry in her eyes. A month ago, he would have thought such a look impossible. She had lived up to her Ashen Demon moniker well. The emotionless mercenary who could cut through her enemies without a flinch or stutter – it was a sight to behold in battle. However, she seemed to be opening up over time. There were moments, however brief, where a small expression would finally pass over her face, as if her emotions were slowly awakening. A stern glare when she caught Sylvain goofing off in class. A small smile when Annette happily bounced up and down after casting a new spell correctly. And now, a worried frown as she looked at her house leader in the middle of the night.
However, the look faded from her face as quickly as it had appeared, and she stared at him with impassive eyes once more. “Please don’t overexert yourself.”
Dimitri smiled, but the countenance did not reach his eyes. “Of course. Good night, Professor.”
Unfortunately, saying he was going to sleep and actually going to sleep were two entirely different tasks. Dimitri did head back to his room as promised, but he spent the next several hours tossing and turning in bed. When he did finally manage to sleep, voices and faces of those long passed haunted him, and he jolted awake.
After his third bout of waking, Dimitri reluctantly sat up. He held his head in his hands as he took deep breaths to tame his heart rate. This is exactly why he had been avoiding sleep to begin with. As painful as staying up so late could be, at least he could distract himself with reading or studying. But when he laid his head down and his mind was left to its own devices, he couldn’t escape the torment.
His father. His stepmother. Glenn. Those that died on that fateful day in Duscur stayed with him, whispering, mocking, calling for him. For revenge. For salvation. For blood. For deliverance.
“I know, I know,” he muttered aloud in his empty room, clutching his hair as he sunk his head further into his hands. “I know.”
The sun was only just beginning to rise over the horizon, and the light struggled to make it past his curtains. There was no use trying to fall back asleep at this point. He might as well get up. Taking one last deep breath, Dimitri sat up straight. Pain emanated from his temples and across his forehead as he stood up, but he was used to fighting past it.
Perhaps he would head to the training grounds for some practice before class. Anything to escape the voices a little longer.
Byleth’s words from the night before seared into Dimitri’s mind. She was right, of course. She was always right.
He could feel how much his reflexes lagged as Felix knocked him off his feet in combat practice. Though her face didn’t indicate such, Dimitri could feel the disappointment radiating from the professor as she watched.
But what was he to do? Sleep alluded him, and lying in bed only made him more anxious. As the sun set and the monastery slowly retired for the night, Dimitri found himself pacing back and forth in his bedroom. He couldn’t sit still. But he also couldn’t return to the library. Not after getting caught there twice by the professor. There was a chance she might be waiting around in the event he showed up again. Perhaps, then, it would make sense to visit the opposite side of the monastery. A walk through the greenhouse sounded nice. The smell of nature might calm his racing mind enough to let him relax, even if just a little.
When the sky finally grew dark, Dimitri left his room. He made his way down the dormitory hall, past the doors of his fellow students as they buckled into their studies or readied themselves for bed. The hall itself was empty, save for the stray cat or two that stretched themselves out for a good rest. Dimitri tried to walk as quietly as possible while still appearing to move with purpose. Not that the cats would question where he was going and why, but he nevertheless felt unnerved.
The greenhouse was a short walk from the dormitory, and surprisingly unlocked. That should have been Dimitri’s first sign to leave, but the exhausted prince didn’t think much of it as he let himself in. He inhaled deeply. The scent of the greenhouse was overly sweet with flowers, but nonetheless refreshing. He could see why Dedue spent so much of his time in here. If he was careful, he could make a night walk through the greenhouse a part of his routine-
Dimitri stopped mid stride as he turned the corner and found Byleth packing soil around a flower.
Of course. If he had stopped to think about it, he would have remembered the professor’s love of gardening. The greenhouse was never a safe option to hide. He really was becoming useless if he couldn’t even think through such basic scenarios as this. The prince started to turn as quietly as he could, hoping to not draw any attention to himself as he slipped out.
“Dimitri.”
Crap.
Dimitri turned back around, trying to hide any signs of guilt from his face as best he could. He watched as Byleth stood up and wiped the dirt from her hands on the cuff of her shorts before walking over to him.
“You’re gardening awfully late, Professor,” Dimitri greeted with a nervous smile.
“It wasn’t getting enough sunlight,” she responded, looking back at the flower she had just finished planting. It wasn’t quite a reply to what he had said, but Dimitri let her continue. “I kept checking on it, but it wasn’t growing quite right. The more I thought about it, the more it worried me, and I ended up coming back tonight to move it.”
“But why do this in the dark?” the prince asked. “How can you tell it will get enough sunlight now?”
Instead of answering, Byleth looked up to the glass ceiling. Dimitri followed her gaze. The sky was clear that night, and a nearly full moon shined brightly down on them. As the prince slowly lowered his eyes back to the flower, he realized it sat in a perfect patch of moonlight.
“You’re out late again,” Byleth noted after a moment of silence.
Her words drew Dimitri’s attention back to her. She was staring at him again with those piercing eyes that made him forget she was a half foot shorter than himself.
“I am. I’m sorry, Professor. I’m not great at sitting still,” he sighed.
“Felix bested you rather quickly today.”
Dimitri reluctantly nodded. “I was too slow.”
Byleth finally tore her judging eyes away from him, looking back at her flower. “It doesn’t affect just you, you know. If you trip on the battlefield, your allies also suffer.”
The prince didn’t respond. What could he say? Apologize for his constant mistakes? Admit to the nightmares that had been keeping him up for four years now? Would any of that even satisfy what she was asking of him?
Dimitri watched as the professor walked back over to where he had found her. She picked up her spade and brushed off some of the soil from its blade. When she looked back at him, her face caught some of the moonlight, and once again Dimitri caught a glance of that worried look she had given him the night prior.
“You care about your classmates, right?” she asked.
Dimitri replied immediately, “Of course I do.”
“And would you say you care about me?”
At that moment, the prince was thankful that it was the professor in the moonlight and not himself. He could feel his cheeks burning as he did his best to suppress the choking sounds trying to escape his throat. Did the professor not realize the gravity of the question she was asking? It was so hard to tell when she stared back at him so earnestly.
“Of course, Professor,” he finally answered. “The Blue Lions would be nowhere without your guidance both in class and on the battlefield.”
Byleth slowly walked back to his side. “Then please return to your room. I’ll follow you out so I can lock up.”
Dimitri nodded and begrudgingly headed out of the greenhouse.
And here he was again, back in his room. Dimitri started to pace as he had earlier that evening. What was he to do? It looked as if Byleth was heading back to her own room when they parted ways, but was it even worth trying to leave again? And attempting to sleep would only end in him tossing and turning as he usually did. Maybe he could review the tactics covered in class today.
He barely got the chance to sit down and open his notes before hearing a small knock at the door.
Curious. Who would be looking for him so late? Was there some sort of emergency? But then why was the hall so silent?
He wasn’t going to get any answers by sitting and pondering over the situation. Standing back up, Dimitri walked over to the door and cautiously opened it. Byleth stood on the other side.
“Professor?” the prince asked quizzically.
“May I come in?”
This night kept growing stranger. “Yes, come in,” Dimitri beckoned, opening the door wider and stepping to the side to allow Byleth enough room to enter.
He quickly shut the door behind her and she took a look around. It felt almost surreal having her in his quarters like this. Watching her carefully take in her surroundings made him feel bashful about his tidiness. He did try to keep his things as orderly as possibly, but sometimes- wait no. That was beside the point. What was she even doing here in the first place?
“Were you worried I would wander off again after sending me back?” the prince chuckled anxiously. “I came to my room, just as you asked.”
Byleth shook her head as she turned to him. “You said you’re having trouble sleeping. I’m here to help you sleep.”