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The elevator of Wangshu Inn slowly carries Ganyu up the base of the tree, the gears whirring along the cables mimicking the sound in her head. For the past three hours, she has been mentally rehearsing conversations involving a certain someone.
“Would you like to get some lunch one of these days? It doesn’t have to be in the city because I know you don’t like crowds.”
Ganyu shakes her head. No, that sounds too desperate and it might upset him - not to mention her wording could be better.
She tries again. “I was wondering - of course it’s up to you, if you’d like to meet me in the outskirts of the city during one of my breaks. I can bring us some snacks too!”
No, definitely not. The phrase sounds far too clingy and she’s not even sure if Xiao enjoys snacks as much as she does.
“...Ugh!”
Ganyu runs a hand through her hair, feeling a panicky sensation creeping up her toes.
Perhaps she made a mistake in coming here. Really, what was she thinking? That after their quiet moment on the hilltop he may be a tad partial towards her? Having woken up in Xiao’s arms, the feeling of his embrace around her - she hasn’t been able to get it out of her mind.
It just seems so...so unlike him to act in the way he did.
A nagging desire reminding her faintly of an annoying fly, will not stop buzzing in her subconscious everytime she recollects it. If only she could swat it away into the oblivion and return those silly notions where they belong - the trash bin. But she knows that if she chooses not to reach out to him now, the regret will eat her conscience alive later.
At this point, the elevator jolts to a stop, shaking Ganyu from her thoughts; she’s reached the top of the inn.
Well, there’s no going back now.
As Ganyu climbs the staircase to the balcony Xiao often acquaints himself with, she figures since she’s journeyed all the way here and took an afternoon off work, she might as well ask and get the inevitable rejection over with.
Timidly creeping out into the open space of the rooftop perch, Ganyu scans the balcony for his familiar figure. It’s eerily empty, save for some leaves blowing across the patio.
“Xiao...are you here?” She whispers aloud in the hope he might hear.
A soft breeze tickles her face, sending a few baby hairs flying out of place. And suddenly, the adeptus appears in front of her, a whirl of black smoke ensuing behind his figure.
“Ganyu.” He tilts his head in acknowledgment. “How can I help you?”
She turns her head to face him, intending on delivering her practiced speech without delay. But when she looks into his eyes and takes in his emotionless countenance, Ganyu’s resolve falters, her gaze quickly dropping to the wooden floor.
“I...well...uh.” Her fingers fiddle with the sash at her waist.
Xiao crosses his arms over his chest, looking unnamused at her inability to form words.
Get a grip, Ganyu. You came here to ask him because you wanted to -- so ask him.
She takes a deep breath and straightens her posture, looking him fully in the eyes, surprising herself at how steady her voice comes out. “Normally, during my breaks at work, I tend to pass the time alone. However, I’d like to invite you to join me - if you have the time of course!”
Xiao’s eyes widen, his expression slightly taken aback at her request, his posture almost losing its routine stiffness.
Sensing as if he is about to say something, Ganyu hurriedly continues before he can dismiss her. “I know a few vacant places near the city that are far away from the crowds, nobody will be able to intrude.” She gives him a half grin. “Being the Qixing Secretary has its perks.”
And then she stands there, with her heart hammering in her chest, waiting for the verdict.
Xiao is dumbfounded. He can feel a trace of annoyance in the back of his mind amidst the shock of what she’s asking from him. In all honesty, he’d reject her flat out if it weren’t for how bold she was in her invitation.
No, denying her when it most likely took extreme conviction in approaching him would be beyond inconsiderate.
“Why?” He simply asks.
“...I’m afraid I don’t understand what you mean.”
“Why me? I’m sure you have other options for people to seek out.”
Ganyu scrunches her face, dropping the braided sash of her vision and grasping her own hand instead. “I don’t want to spend my few moments of free time alone.”
“So find someone to keep you company.”
“Well, ah you see, I am - I’m asking you. There’s nobody else I’d be willing or comfortable to request this of.”
“...”
To put it bluntly, Xiao has no words - his mind is as blank as a sheet of paper. He doesn’t understand - cannot fathom why Ganyu would choose his company over anyone else’s. Whatever it is she’s looking for, whether it be friendship or a form of companionship, he is the absolute worst person to demonstrate either of those. Human emotions are simply not something he knows how to convey nor is he willing to take that step and learn.
The only thing he is certain will come out of a friendship with anyone is death. Death and destruction - nothing more, nothing less.
But the hopeful glimmer in Ganyu’s face and the way her large eyes are glowing as she gazes up at him (like she somehow thinks there’s a chance he’ll say yes) momentarily detracts his train of thought.
Xiao cannot bring himself to turn her down - not immediately, at least.
A little voice in his head is urging him to discover her true intentions. Surely she must be lying, there can be no possible way she wants to spend time with him.
He sighs loudly, releasing the tension in his shoulders and letting his hands fall to his side. “I don’t care to accept requests similar to yours,” He makes a sweeping motion with his hand. “This... companionship you are asking from me, I think you know why it may not be a good idea to pursue.”
Ganyu nods solemnly. “I know what you speak of and I wholly understand your concerns.”
She takes a small step towards him, ignoring the way his yellow eyes hone in on her movements.
“Xiao, if I believed spending an hour with you during my lunch break might put you at risk, I wouldn’t dare suggest it. But with that in mind, I don’t think there is any danger in keeping me company.”
“...I don’t go on lunch dates.”
“Then don’t, think of it as doing me a favor. Truly, I would enjoy your company more than you know.”
And then Ganyu gives him one of those smiles, the way her mouth crinkles upwards reminds him vividly of a human girl he saw in front of a toy stand near the settlements of Dihua Marsh. The little girl was looking up at what he assumed was her father, her eyes matching the same imploring expression Ganyu wears now - as if giving him a pair of doleful eyes will persuade him. It may have worked for the mortal’s father, but it won’t win him over.
But then, to his immense misfortune, she widens her smile, Ganyu’s mouth unfolding into a full blown curve, her white teeth flashing in the sun.
Xiao sucks in a breath.
It takes him immense restraint not to vanish in front of her and avoid giving an answer altogether; Xiao finds himself struggling to revoke her or more importantly, he doesn’t want to be the reason her face crumples from his cold response.
“I’ll think about it,” Is all he says.
Ganyu gasps, clapping her hands together excitedly before realizing maybe she shouldn’t be celebrating and dropping the gesture altogether.
“Okay! I’ll call you on a Thursday around three and if you’d like to come, you are more than welcome to.”
Xiao scowls. “That’s not how it works, saying my name like that.”
“Oh... well, how should I contact you then?”
“I’ll find you.”
Wait, what did he just say? Xiao is most definitely not agreeing to this pathetically sentimental outing.
“It’s settled, I’ll see you then!” Ganyu smiles warmly at him, unaware of how he’s mentally kicking himself.
He watches irritably as she skips down the staircase, her long hair bouncing in rhythm with her body. He can feel the scowl on his face growing larger by the second.
Giving out favors like candy - giving out favors without killing something strikes a mental cord within himself that he loathes more than anything. Worst case scenario, he can always opt out of their “planned” rendezvous by not showing up at all.
Yes, he’ll keep telling himself that until he no longer feels guilty for bailing on her.
He shows up despite the internal affirmations that he wouldn’t.
It doesn’t take him long to find her. Xiao can sense the ebbing pool of mental stress and exhaustion stemming from a thousand years of work that can only be related to Ganyu.
She kept her word in choosing a location away from mortal eyes to which Xiao feels immensely thankful for, the overgrown grove of trees bordering the city limits shielding them from prying eyes. Xiao walks quietly under the eaves, ducking his head to enter the perimeter. He spies her figure on the floor, her back leaning against an enormous spruce tree with her slim legs stretched out in front.
Ganyu moves to attention when she sees him, the tired lines on her face perking up.
“Hello!”
Her hand pats the space beside her and he obliges, albeit reluctantly, easing himself onto the ground while taking care to put a good foot between them for good measure.
“Thank you for coming,” she says cheerfully.
Xiao grunts in response, avoiding her stare by scanning the tops of the trees and taking in the surroundings of green grass at his feet and the calls of chirping birds. It’s as if he has stepped into an earthy biome that resembles nothing like the rolling landscape of Liyue - how Ganyu discovered this place is beyond him.
“The last time I came here, this tree we’re sitting behind was a tad smaller and with far fewer leaves.”
“How long ago was that?” Xiao asks, turning his attention back to her.
Ganyu twiddles her thumbs. “Hmm, a few hundred years I think.”
Sometimes Xiao forgets just how young Ganyu is in terms of time. She hasn’t experienced the weight of six millenia upon her back, hasn’t watched the lives of loved ones disappear in the blink of an eye despite her part in the Archon War.
He wants to tell her to be prepared for the inevitable grief pertaining to time and death, but he refrains from doing so, figuring Ganyu does not need to hear about his negative reflections.
“Come back in another thousand years and you might find your perspective changing.”
She smiles sadly. “I hope that day never comes, even though I know it will catch up to me eventually. Sometimes, I feel as if I blink and suddenly, a few hundred years have gone by.”
Xiao scoffs inwardly at her response, but he holds the objection back. The dark years of his life have nothing to do with her and he has to remind himself not to judge her naive nature too harshly. One day Ganyu will learn, if not today, but at some point she’ll come to the conclusion herself.
Instead, he takes a breath and forces his mind to the present moment. “No stuffed animal this time?”
She chuckles, the corners of her mouth lifting up. “No, I save her for special occasions or when I feel I am in need of extra comfort.”
“I see...and was this not supposed to be a lunch date?”
He can’t see any sign of food anywhere on her. Wasn’t the whole point in this agreement for her to eat without feeling pitiful human emotions?
“I made sure to finish eating before coming,” She supplies, her shoulders shrugging lightly.
“Why?”
“I suppose - well, I didn’t want you to feel awkward by the connotation of lunch. I figured coming here was stretching your limits enough.”
Well, she’s not wrong, Xiao thinks to himself, but he doesn’t say that.
“Do not spare such trivial thoughts about me, if you wish to eat during your break then do so.”
“Ah, alright...would it be okay if I brought you something to eat for next time?”
“No.”
There won’t be a next time.
“Oh, okay.”
With a small sigh, Ganyu settles against the back of the tree, seemingly giving up on the conversation and folding her arms across her chest.
Xiao watches from the corner of his eye, wondering what she plans on doing with the remaining minutes of her break.
And then, to his horror, she closes her eyes.
Oh no, this is not happening.
“You’re not going to fall asleep, are you?” Xiao blurts before she has the chance to doze off.
“Unfortunately, no.”
“You have your eyes closed,” he points out.
“Well, the last time I took a nap during work I ended up in a hay bale almost thirty miles from the city.” She smiles, her eyes still closed. “If I fall asleep now, there will be nobody to wake me and I will sleep through my entire day. So, I am simply pretending to get some rest.”
“I can wake you up.”
Wait, what ?
The words come out of his mouth before he can stop them. Oh, he’s really made a mistake now.
Her eyes flash open. “You’d do that? I mean - it wouldn’t be too much to ask?”
Yes.
“No,” He grits out. “It wouldn’t. In fact, the less talking I have to do the better.”
Ganyu laughs aloud, her soft voice echoing across the confines of trees. “I’m not sure if you know this, but you may be in over your head, Adeptus Xiao. You see, I am a very heavy sleeper.”
Oh, he is well aware of that.
“The sooner we begin the more time you will have.”
And the sooner he gets to leave and never think back upon this moment.
“Here.” Ganyu unclasps a small silver watch around her wrist, holding it out to him in her open palm.
His fingers brush her skin as he takes it and even with his gloves, Xiao shivers slightly at the contact.
“If you would be so kind as to wake me up in thirty minutes, I would be so grateful. Thank you, Xiao.”
The smile doesn’t leave her face as she gets herself comfortable, resting her head against the trunk.
He doesn’t say anything; rather, he twists the hands of the watch to the correct time and leans back with a heavy sigh.
Beside him, Ganyu sits motionless. It doesn’t take long for her breathing to shorten, her body relaxing as the sleep takes her.
Xiao marvels at her ability to nap within seconds, wonders what it must be like to fall asleep with ease - not that he needs it, of course. And with nothing else to do, besides ruminating over the lost souls he’s brutally murdered (and he’s not about to delve into that rabbit hole) Xiao stares morosely at the foliage in front of him.
Wait, something isn’t right...
It takes him a second to realize the voices in his head are hushed with not even the angriest, loudest demons being heard over the rustle of the trees and his own breathing. Xiao can’t believe he didn’t notice it before and he has to blink a few times to make sure his head isn’t playing tricks on him.
The only moments of reprieve from the agony come from Barbatos...and apparently now her.
It’s happened twice. The first time he chalked it up to the ambience of the festival but this time, there’s no lanterns to distract him - there’s only Ganyu. No, this cannot be true. Xiao has been in the same room before, he’s stood amongst the Adepti with her in their ranks.
Why now? What is it about her presence that quiets his head?
Xiao brings a hand to his face and groans loudly into it, wondering briefly if he is finally going insane. And then he lets his hand drop, deciding that if the next thirty minutes of his day are to be spent without the heavy weight of his karmic bonds, then he ought to make the most of it.
And Xiao does.
He closes his eyes and concentrates on the sounds and aromas surrounding him.
At first the idea seems utterly beneath him in that he doesn’t deserve to relax and enjoy nature - it’s beyond ridiculous to even try. But then he spares a glance at Ganyu and notices how peaceful she sleeps without a care in the world, realizing how much he yearns to be able to sit quietly without a million voices screaming to rip his throat out.
Furthermore, she trusts him enough to doze beside him, trusts that he won’t leave her to sleep through her work schedule. Xiao isn’t sure why, but he finds the notion oddly calming - and so he relaxes his shoulders and tries again before the voices return and he loses the opportunity.
One second passes, and then three before his subconscious wins against the karma and his mind opens itself up.
The rustling trees. A hawk screeching from somewhere above. The misty smell of wet vegetation and...a frog croaking in the distance?
It’s surreal, what his head has the capability of noticing without every space being inhabited with the voices of death. He gets so caught up in his thoughts and senses, actually enjoying the atmosphere - that Xiao almost forgets the time, the small watch whirring to remind him of Ganyu’s deadline.
Blinking open his eyes, he turns to face the sleeping girl.
He clears his throat. “Ganyu?”
No response.
He prods her shoulder with his index finger but she remains fast asleep. Xiao pokes her a little harder this time. Ganyu doesn’t even shift, her face still peacefully dreaming.
“She wasn’t kidding,” He says aloud to himself.
Casting a quick glance at the watch she gave him, the small star studded arms reveal it is now five minutes past the original time.
Xiao quickly sits up into a crouching position, resting on the balls of his feet as he extends his hand towards her. He’s tempted to shake Ganyu violently by the shoulders as there is no way she won’t wake up from that. But in lieu of aggressively rattling her awake, Xiao gingerly strokes the baby hairs from Ganyu’s temple, tucking the strands behind her ear and revealing the side of her face.
He lets his fingers linger for a breath of a moment before pulling away, his heart hammering in his chest from the sudden actions that seemingly came out of nowhere. What is wrong with him?
Ganyu makes a soft sighing noise as his fingers graze her ear and then suddenly, as soon as he pulls back, her eyes flash open.
She catches him in the act then, his hand is still hovering outstretched when her eyes meet his and he quickly retrieves it as if something has burnt him. Ironically, they both gasp out at the same time - Ganyu gasping from surprise and Xiao making a sound like he is being strangled.
As Ganyu blinks up at him through tired eyes, Xiao stiffly rises to his feet.
His voice is ice cold when he speaks. “Two things, I believe you are late for your work and this occasion is now over.” He turns to leave without sparing her a glance, wishing desperately to return to his solitude.
“Wait!” Her small hand wraps itself around his forearm, tugging him forcefully into place.
Xiao whirls around, his cheeks burning with embarrassment and shame; he wants so badly to wipe away any trace of emotion from his face.
What a damned fool he is.
“Please, what can you possibly want from me?”
The voices in his head are growing, their screams coming to a gradual climb and he winces from the magnitude.
“Will you come again?” She asks him, her eyes wide and imploring. “Just once a week, Xiao. It’s only once a week for an hour and if you say no - I won’t ask you anymore, I’ll get out of your life for good.”
Xiao hesitates, choosing his next words carefully.
On one hand, he never wants to see her again. He’s shown emotion, committed wishful human actions that go against everything he’s been taught to believe. Archon knows what she must think of him now.
But on the other hand (unbeknownst to his own feelings) Xiao finds himself wanting to return - to allow Ganyu to grace him with her peaceful countenance. For the briefest of moments, he was able to catch a reprieve from his own mind. When was the last time his head was silent for longer than five minutes? Not since...he doesn’t like to think about that part of his past.
“Xiao?” Ganyu interjects, tugging softly on his arm.
His eyes trail down to where she’s gripping him, her fingers burning holes into his skin.
Xiao wants to see her again, wants to be able to sit in the presence of another without having to give away every piece of himself.
So what if he allows himself this small taste of bliss? After all, it couldn’t hurt to spend an hour in someone’s company so long as he never lets his guard down again.
“Okay,” he says, and she smiles.
And so, a new tradition begins. Every Thursday on the dot, the two will meet up at a private location near the city. Sometimes they talk, and other times they will not utter a single word. Ganyu doesn’t feel the need to fill the comfortable space with words and Xiao himself loathes speaking. And sometimes, Ganyu will tell him about her work, always keeping it brief and never drawling on too long because she knows he cannot stand speaking about the lives of humans.
Occasionally, Xiao will share the latest annoying quip directed at him from Moon Carver and Ganyu will laugh into her hand - which in turn will prompt her to ask about Cloud Retainer and if the Adepti has been taking care of herself.
Xiao always assures Ganyu she is, reminding her subtly (because he knows leaving the city is a touchy subject) that she can always go up to Jueyan Karst to say hello.
And so, along with a considerable amount of naps and qixing flowers, their lunch dates pass by in a soft spoken manner. To her, it’s a miracle to even claim an hour of his time. She keeps thinking one day Xiao will stop coming but he never does - showing up every week without fail.
The next time Ganyu sees him, however, is not on a Thursday but a Wednesday.
She’s in the middle of a conversation with an important Liyue Qixing member. It’s early in the morning, the hazy fog still lingers over the harbor and the sun has barely risen. The official is spewing tasks at her while she scribbles names and dates furiously on her notepad.
Go to the harbor front and create an itinerary list, then ask the Commerce Guild associate for the market forms and then…
Ganyu looks up from her writing, peering around at her surroundings. She can sense someone, someone with a very familiar aura.
Is it really him?
The Qixing official continues prattling on while she pauses to listen for the Adepti, her pen stilling against the parchment. Yes, it is indeed Xiao.
“Did you get all that?” The official asks, his demeanor annoyed from the prospect of being ignored.
“Yes, I did,” She lies. “T-thank you!”
And Ganyu tucks her notebook and quill under her arm, jogging towards where her senses last perceived him, not thinking twice about leaving the man standing alone.
She finds Xiao standing under a large tree, shaded from view by the overhanging branches exactly two streets across from the wharf. It’s a surprise to see him in the city but thankfully, it is still too early for the normal crowds to inhabit the streets and the few passerbys she notices hardly cast a glance in his direction.
“Xiao, it’s good to see you,” She says, stepping over the stone banister and approaching his figure.
He nods his head in his usual greeting. “Ganyu, I apologize for coming unannounced. If I’m being honest, I didn’t think you’d notice me.”
She waves her hand. “Nonsense. I’m glad to see you, actually. Today has not taken a smooth start.”
“Mine too...how long do you have?”
“As long as you want,” Ganyu replies, and she means it. For the first time, Xiao has sought her out; it’s a huge step forward and not an opportunity she’s about to ignore simply because she has things to do.
If someone had told her months ago that she would be putting off work for personal visits, she would have laughed them off the stage. But here she is, a few months later, completely avoiding her tasks. She internally apologizes to Rex Lapis for breaking their contract.
“Shall we?” She motions towards the ground.
A ghost of a smirk floats over Xiao’s lips and together, they ease themselves onto the floor.
It’s funny really, how he’s taken up her habit of sitting anywhere no matter how uncomfortable the spot might be.
As Ganyu sits down, she notices their shoulders grazing each other, can practically feel his muscles against her bare arm. Neither of them move and Ganyu takes it as another small victory; and with a smile, she makes herself comfortable, pressing her shoulder fully against his. No sooner has a minute gone by before she tries to stifle a yawn and fails, her body taking notice that she is sitting down eleven hours too soon and prompting her for a nap.
“Let me guess, if you had the option to sleep, you would,” Xiao remarks.
“Oh yes, without a doubt,” Ganyu replies, another yawn escaping her. “But enough about me, is everything okay? Something must have happened for you to grace me with your unexpected company.”
Xiao snorts at her comment. “Nothing is the matter, I just…erm...”
She can see his face immediately clouding over, his rare amiable mood dropping.
“You don’t have to explain. It’s okay, really,” She hurries, almost regretting asking from the look in his eyes.
Xiao takes a breath, his voice oddly quiet. “If you wouldn’t mind, I just need to sit for a minute...that’s why I’m here.”
“Okay, but I hope you know I’m closing my eyes,” Ganyu teases, shooting him a sly smile.
“Of course,” He says, the stern look on his face turning into something almost resembling humor.
And Ganyu leans back, settling in for a quick rest much like every other time. What she doesn’t expect is for Xiao to wrap his arm around her shoulder, pulling her into a tight embrace. Wide eyed, she looks up from where her head is pressed against his upper chest to stare in disbelief. His eyes are shut, Xiao's face strangely calm considering what he’s currently doing.
Sensing no regret or exasperated body language from him, Ganyu gathers her confidence and burrows her face into his tight shirt, encircling her free arm around his shockingly slim waist.
And to her absolute wonder, he lets her.
Ganyu is floored, her heart beating rapidly at the sudden change between them. And Archons, does he smell good.
The aroma coming from him, it reminds Ganyu of the time she spent sleeping in one of the pine woods near Mt. Hula. The rain clouds had just finished sprinkling atop the trees and the air held a distinctive odor consisting of pine and fresh rain. Yes, that’s exactly what Xiao smells like - a taste of the outdoors. Really, she doesn’t think anything else would suit him.
And she presses her eyes shut and revels in the touch that belongs to the Vigilant Yaksha.
Not surprisingly, both of them promptly fall asleep wrapped in each other’s hold. But when Xiao gently nudges her awake sometime later and Ganyu notices that the sun is now high in the sky, she finds she is not even remotely angry.
“That was one of the best naps I’ve taken,” She tells him, grabbing his hand and helping him stand to his feet.
“That was one of the first naps I’ve taken in over a thousand years,” He says, dusting himself off.
Ganyu laughs. “We’ll have to do it again, but next time not during my work schedule.”
“Tomorrow it is, then.”
And they both share a small smile at that.