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There's three of them.
Three of them in this relationship.
There's Dream, the tallest, the strongest, the bravest. He'd protect them anytime they went out hunting, made sure no skeletons or creepers randomly attacked them. He made sure to stand guard on late night adventures
Theres George, the oldest, the caretaker, the romantic. He'd make sure everyone had eaten enough, that they'd drink water and rest up after battles. He'd cling to them after calm nights, cuddling. He was there for them.
There's Sapnap, the youngest, the sassiest, the fearless. He was quick with witty responses, he didn't let enemies have an upper hand. He'd rush into fights without a second thought.
Three of them.
There's always been three of them.
So why did it feel like there were only two?
Why did Sapnap have to spend hours convincing himself his boyfriends loved him?
Why was it that George and Dream seemed to get along without him just fine?
Why was it when Sapnap wasn't with them, Dream and George seemed to have a better time?
Sapnap felt left out in his own relationship. He felt like the training wheels on a bicycle. That he was only there for extra support, not because he was wanted or actually needed.
One night after he'd been out for a while getting diamonds for them, he'd come back to see George and Dream cuddling.
It wasn't an abnormal scene, they cuddled all the time. Hell, if there was one thing you could expect from them it was them to be glued to each other's sides.
But the fact they were cuddling isn't what made Sapnap pause.
It was that George laid on top of Dream's chest, Dream holding a hand carefully over his back, a leg and an arm laying off the side, his other leg pressed against the wall.
There was no room for Sapnap.
The younger frowned at the scene, but turned and closed the door, not wanting to wake up his loved ones and instead fell asleep in their guest bed.
He was so cold that night.
Neither Dream or George said anything about it in the morning and Sapnap;s heart sank a bit.
He decided he would test something.
Test their love, almost.
See if he was simply being paranoid or if he was right, no one loved him.
Sapnap fell asleep in the guest room again that night, and the night after, and the night after.
Neither of his boyfriends said anything.
Not one "hey are you okay?" Not a single "what's been with you lately?" Not a "come sleep with us tonight."
It's like they didn't even notice.
Sapnap felt hurt.
His own boyfriends didn't even question his absence at night. It only made him wonder what else they wouldn't notice.
Sapnap didn't go on their dates anymore, not outright turning it down, just being absent for when they'd planned it.
They never asked him where he'd been or said they'd missed him.
Sapnap showed up late to dinner.
Half of the time he came home they'd already put everything away, saying they thought he'd already eaten.
He hadn't.
And he didn't after.
Sapnap was hardly even home anymore, hardly ever saw his boyfriends, and they acted like everything was normal.
Dream and George went on dates more often now, they took up more space when cuddling, they kissed a lot more.
It seemed like they were better without Sapnap.
It made him wonder how they'd react if he went away entirely.
And thoughts like these plagued him late at night.
They crept up when he'd be walking along a lava edge in the nether.
They'd invade him when he'd be towering up high in the sky.
They possess him when he'd come across a deep ravine.
They'd yell at him when he'd be cutting up animals with his axe.
It's all he thought about.
What would they say if he disappeared?
How would they react if he died?
What would they do if he was just gone?
Would they even notice?
Sapnap knew these thoughts were bad but it's all he could think.
He didn't like these thoughts. Not one bit.
They made his spine chill, they made him shake, they made him sad.
And when the thoughts got too bad he'd run to his only place of sanctum.
The only place where he felt safe, where he felt loved, where there was always food on the table and always love for him.
He'd pound on a colorful oak door, that would swing open to reveal two warming smiles, two pairs of arms that would wrap around him and comfort him, two voices that would give him advice, two pairs of ears that would listen to him vent.
Two people who cared more than his own boyfriends.
Sapnap laid on Karl Jacobs couch, the older male playing with his hair as Sapnap broke down his recent reason for visiting him as Quackity made him hot cocoa.
"-and I came out of my room and George looked surprised! And when I asked why he said he didn't think I was home and they'd only made enough dinner for the two of them! They didn't even bother to check if I was home! It was like I was invisible." Sapnap whined, tears in his eyes.
"Well, we still have a lot of food ready, and we can make more if you need it." Karl said, smiling a bit sadly.
".... I'm not hungry anyways." Sapnap mumbled.
"You need to eat, man." Quackity said, handing him a warm cup and Sapnap sat up.
"It's fine, I'm not hungry." Sapnap insisted and drank the warm liquid happily.
Karl and Quackity shared a look, ready to say something but then there was a knock at their door.
"Is that for you?" They asked each other in unison and they raised an eyebrow.
Sapnap looked at them. "Well answer it." He said jokingly, the heavy tension in the air leaving at his light hearted tone.
Quackity pushed himself up and opened the door, freezing in the doorway.
"Uuuuhhhhh-" he said loudly and Karl walked over also. "Oh, uh, hello. What're you guys doing here?" Karl asked nervously, glancing over his shoulder.
"Is he here?" Sapnap perked up at the sound of his boyfriend's voice, standing up and walking over. "Dream!" Sapnap said.
They've never checked on him before, happiness swirled in Sapnap's chest. Maybe they did care.
"Is this where you keep running off to all the time?" George asked sadly and Karl and Quackity moved aside for Sapnap to see them properly.
"No, I've only been stopping by for about two weeks or so now. Before that I was just..." Sapnap shrugged and George frowned. "I've missed you guys though!" He said and opened his arms. Dream opened his and held the other tightly to his chest, his grip tight as Sapnap pulled away to press a kiss on his cheek.
"We haven't been the ones absent." Dream noted and Sapnap furrowed his brows, gently rubbing his hands on his fuzzy cheeks before he pulled away, looking at his shoes. "Yeah well, you guys haven't been asking me on dates. I've been coming here a lot."
"Why do you come here?" George asked, his tone a bit sharp and Sapnap looked up, confused at the tone before realization lit up his face and he furrowed his brows. George pulled him close to him, glaring at Quackity and Karl who glared back. Sapnap looked back and forth at them.
"Wait do you think-" "What else are we supposed to think, Sapnap?" Dream interrupted.
Sapnap flinched at the harsh tone, trying to pull away from George and Karl and Quackity looked at each other again, matching frowns in place.
"For months now you've just been not home, anytime we go out, you're not there, we have dinner and you aren't home, we wake up and you're not there! And now we find you here with these guys? What are we supposed to think, Sapnap?" George asked, desperately and Sapnap pulled away from him, eyes wide with tears.
"Wait you- you guys noticed I was separating myself... And you didn't say anything?" Sapnap asked.
"Of course we noticed, we thought you just hated us or something." Dream mumbled. "And it looks like I was right."
"No-" Sapnap could feel the tears welling up in his eyes start to fall and he clenched his fist. "You guys- you guys never said ANYTHING." Sapnap started and Dream and George went dead silent.
"Anytime I was late for a date, you guys never messaged me to see if I was running late, you'd leave without me. You guys never checked in on if I was okay, you ignored me. I come home late thinking I'll be able to fall asleep with my wonderful boyfriends only to see there's no room for me! There's never room for me. You guys never have room for me in the bed, you never have enough food to make for dinner, you never have enough time for me on dates. You guys- you just-" Sapnap sniffled and wiped away his rapidly falling tears. He fully stepped away from his boyfriends now.
"Not once did you guys ask if I was okay, or even checked in on me. Hell, I don't even think you really noticed. And now, you find the one rare time I'm at a friend's house after you guys yet again ignored me, and assume I'm cheating on you, right? I love you both, so much, but you both seem like you could care less about me."
"Pandas-" "Don't..... Don't do that," Sapnap looked up at Dream, whose hand had been reaching out to hold him but now stayed frozen mid air. "Don't try and act like you care because if we never had this conversation, everything would still be the same. You both would still be ignoring me, you'd still be acting like I didn't exist, s don't, don't "panda" me."
George looked at his feet, and Dream moved his hand to rub at the back of his neck. They both shifted uncomfortably under Sapnap's gaze, feeling Quackity and Karl's judging ones too.
"So what now?" Dream asked after a minute.
".... Now we break up. Because let's face it, I don't think I was ever really dating either of you." Sapnap mumbled. "You two were dating each other while I watched and I'm sick of it."
"Sapnap, no, please I love you as much as I love George." Dream pleaded and Sapnap shook his head. "Well you sure don't act like it." Sapnap stated and turned away, hiding behind Karl and Quackity as he flopped onto their couch.
Karl smiled passive aggressively up at Dream. "We'll take care of him, bring his stuff over and never come back again." He said and Dream simply nodded, head low as the two turned away.
Once the door closed with a resounding click, Sapnap started to sob.
"Dude, I am so proud of you for holding your own." Quackity said, leaning down to ruffle Sapnap's hair, the other made unintelligible crying noises back and Karl sat next to him.
"Sapnap, we really are proud though. You did so good, and you didn't hold back." Karl said and Sapnap sat up, burying his sobs into Karl's shoulder.
"You can stay here as long as you want or need too, okay? We'll set up your room and everything, is that okay?" Karl asked and Sapnap nodded.
"You still haven't eaten though so I'm gonna go cook something." Quackity said and Sapnap sniffled, hand reaching out blindly and grabbing the front of Quackity's track suit as he made to stand up.
"Don't wanna." Sapnap mumbled and tugged Quackity a bit closer, the Mexican stumbling a bit and pressing a hand next to Karl on the couch, the other going to Sapnap's side, locking them both under his hold.
"Sap, you need to eat. When was the last time you had a proper meal? Like a full meal of food." Quackity asked and Sapnap refused to answer, turning his head down as he kept his fist in Quackity's jacket.
"Sippy Cup," Karl said softly and Sapnap looked up at the nickname. "Please answer."
Sapnap looked off to the side, ears red.
"A few months ago." He mumbled ashamedly, more tears welling up and Quackity pulled away.
"Nononono, don't cry, don't feel bad. It's fine, okay? We'll take care of you now. You'll get fed such amazing food and you won't ever have to worry about us forgetting about you, okay?" Karl said.
Sapnap frowned and turned away in shame, trying to muffle his sobs. "I can't- I can't trust that, I'm sorry." Sapnap admitted through tears and Karl sighed, looking back at Quackity briefly and then Sapnap. "I understand. But we are going to, regardless of whether or not you believe it, okay?" Karl promised and Sapnap shrugged.
"You can believe that." Sapnap sniffled.
Karl smiled sadly and stood up, helping Quackity cook dinner.
They shared yet another look and started to get things ready.
They both understood.
They both knew it would take a while for Sapnap to trust them, and they were fine with that.
The two people he cared about most in the world, the two he still cared about, had ignored him and blamed him for things they had done.
But Karl and Quackity would be here for him as long as it would take. They wouldn't leave him, they wouldn't abandon him, he was their friend.
And they both understood that.
Once they were done cooking, Karl walked over with a plate of chicken and mashed potatoes he'd made, Quackity turned on their tv and put on a random Christmas movie that was playing in the background.
Sapnap grabbed the plate and stared down at it. "....Thank you," He mumbled after a moment and started to slowly eat. Karl smiled gently. "No problem."
A few months went by after and Sapnap slowly got better, well, he started to trust Karl and Quackity.
George and Dream would stop by every now and then, they insisted Sapnap was still their friend, that they still cared about him.
Sapnap still hung out with them, but he said it felt awkward because he third wheeled. But then again he had when they had been dating so what else is new.
Sapnap opened up to Karl and Quackity more, he officially moved in, his conversations didn't end with him crying every time now.
Sapnap still couldn't but his trust fully in them, the last time he trusted someone that much, they ended up hurting him.
But in a way, he trusted them more than he ever did with George and Dream.
He trusted that he'd come home to food.
He trusted they'd leave space for him on the couch, and sometimes even in bed if he had nightmares.
He trusted they'd still talk to him, even though they were dating each other, not him.
In a way, it was funny.
When Sapnap was dating George and Dream, he felt more like a third wheel with them then he does with Karl and Quackity, who're only dating each other.
Sapnap laid on the couch scrolling through his notifications on his communicator.
It had been a long day, he'd been out since 5 am invading a pillager base to get materials, then had run into a witch he had to deal with, and then spent the other half trying to cure an entire village that had been zombififed.
Karl came up behind him and ran a hand through his hair, playing with it and Sapnap leaned his head back to look up at him.
"Hey," He greeted with a sleepy smile. "Long day?" Karl asked and Sapnap nodded, closing his eyes as he leaned into the fingers carding through his hair.
"Next time I find a zombie village, I'm just leaving them and Wilbur can deal with it." Sapnap said and groaned. Karl giggled with a wide smile. "Quackers is making dinner and some desserts later. I'm gonna make a pillow fort for us all to snuggle in while we watch movies." He informed and Sapnap smiled.
"Sounds awesome," Sapnap said, voice soft and Karl smiled. "Wanna cuddle while we wait?" Karl asked. "WITHOUT ME?" Quackity yelled from the kitchen and Sapnap and Karl started to laugh.
"Okay, I see how it is Sapnap, just steal my boyfriend right in front of me, I get it." Quackity said, offended and Sapnap only laughed harder, rolling off the couch as Karl and Quackity also lost their shit.
"Watch out Mr. Ity, Jacobs isn't safe for long." Sapnap joked and Karl turned red as he laughed even more and Quackity ran over, jumping over the couch and landing on Sapnap as the fighter erupted into more laughter. Quackity and Sapnap started to fake wrestle each other, Sapnap laughing as he batted Quackity's hands away.
"Threatened?" Sapnap asked through choked laughter and Karl had to lean against the couch for support as he laughed.
"From my view, it looks like I'm the one who needs to worry." He said and Quackity looked up, narrowly dodging a fake punch thrown by Sapnap. Sapnap looked over after a moment and then at Quackity, who sat straddling his waist.
"I-" Sapnap frowned a bit and Quackity turned, hearing his tone change.
"Sap?" Quackity asked gently and Sapnap bit his lip, furrowing his brow and gently pushing Quackity off of him, scooting back a bit.
"....Sorry."Sapnap mumbled and Karl calmed his breathing and walked over, sitting on the couch as Quackity crossed his legs on the floor, both looking at Sapnap who turned away from them.
"For what?" Karl asked and Sapnap shrugged, rubbing his arm. "For invading space? I dunno." He mumbled and Karl sighed a bt as Quackity put a hand on Sapnap's leg. "I tackled you, dude." He pointed out.
"I know but-" Sapnap played with his fingers. "Sorry." He mumbled and Quackity and Karl shared a look.
Sapnap hadn't gotten like this for a while, they wondered why he was reacting so negatively to this.
"Sap?" Karl asked gently and Sapnap looked up at him. "Can you tell us what happened?"
Sapnap knew Karl meant what happened to make him react like that, he just shrugged though and looked down.
"Ion know." Sapnap mumbled and Karl moved to sit in front of him, holding his hand.
"Sippy Cup," Karl pleaded and Sapnap sighed.
"It's just... I dunno, with George and Dream, especially towars the end, I felt like I was imposing, ruining what they could've had between them." Sapnap mumbled. "I don't want to get in the way of you guys."
Karl turned red at the implication of his words and looked at Quackity.
"Sapnap, do you love us?" Karl asked and Sapnap looked down, ears red and nodded. Karl smiled warmly and rubbed the back of his hands.
"We do too, have for a while," Karl confessed and Quackity shuffled closer to them. "We actually talked about it the night before the whole incident." Quackity said and Sapnap looked at them.
"Wh- Why didn't you tell me?" He asked.
"You had just had your heart and trust broken, we didn't want to ruin anything further. Plus we didn't know how you'd feel about polyamorous relationships again after them." Karl said and Sapnap smiled at them.
"Thank you guys for thinking about me but, I'm still... y'know, I'm still poly. And I don't want them to have ruined it for me." Sapnap mumbled. "Also... I- This might be stupid of me but I hope you guys won't leave me out."
Karl smiled warmly and moved his hands to hold his face.
"We will never hurt you ever Sapnap." Karl promised and Sapnap smiled.
"I-"
He reached out and grabbed Quackity's hand smiling.
"I trust you guys."