Chapter Text
Chapter name credit: Misunderstanding - Genesis
Sirius could feel Marlene’s worried gaze drilling into the back of his head. He took another deep breath and plastered on a fake grin. Then, he turned, finally coming face to face with the decision he’d made. The decision that he refused to back down on, despite Marlene’s insistence that he didn’t have to go through with it. Deep blue eyes met bright eyes ones and he took another deep breath, silently reminding himself to breathe. In and out. In and out.
He felt his hand being captured and fingers intertwine with his own. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply as if trying to store all the oxygen for future contests. Marlene squeezed his hand lightly and when he opened his eyes once again, he could see a small smile playing on her lips. Small, but there nonetheless.
The two had always been friends, largely resulting from their personalities being perfect foils of each other. They both came off as arrogant and confident to crowds but were dismissive and quiet in private. They had simply clicked the first time they’d met. Marlene had her own friends in the Gryffindor girls of Dorcas Meadowes, Mary MacDonald, and Lily Evans. Before fourth year, the boys and girls of Gryffindor House were largely separated, other than Marlene and Sirius. They teased each other relentlessly, and at one point it even caused a full out prank war; which the girls won thanks to Lily’s intelligence and Dorcas’ imagination. Nevertheless, they weren’t friends, to say the least. Yet, Marlene had noticed Sirius going through a rough time over the course of the year and ended up accidentally integrating him into the girls’ close-knit group. The girls and he would talk about Quidditch, music, prank ideas to play on the boys, schoolwork, and everything in between.
He still hung out with the boys of course but James was always busy with Quidditch, Remus with studying one thing or another, and Peter with the numerous clubs he loved to participate in. He was on the Gryffindor team with James and Marlene but neither of them practiced nearly as much as the former. He preferred to study on his own or with the girls since Remus always ended up overwhelming himself and therefore Sirius. Lastly, he just couldn't bring himself to sign up for clubs that he was gonna forget about in a week’s time anyway. So instead he hung out with the girls.
Some days, however, it would just be him and Marlene. That was when they tended to spill their biggest secrets to each other and then in most cases, never mention them again. This time, however, seemed different from the start. Marlene looked nervously at him as they sat facing each other on Sirius’ four poster bed. Marlene at the foot while Sirius leaned against the headboard. She fidgeted with her hands and then lifted her eyes till they were connecting with the grey ones across from her.
“Sirius, I’m gonna tell you something and I need you to promise not to freak out.” She could see his eyes widening, attempting to predict what she could possibly be so nervous about. He really hoped she wasn’t about to confess her undying love for him because he was pretty sure that he was
“…gay. I’m gay.”
Sirius immediately started choking on air, feeling as if the oxygen had been stolen from his lungs. Once he finally regained his breath, he burst into barking laughter only seconds after. A few minutes passed, eventually, the laughter subsided and he had been so engrossed in the irony of the situation that he’d forgot about Marlene entirely. He looked up and saw tears rolling down her face silently.
“Oh Merlin, Marls.”
He scooted to the bottom of the bed and wrapped his arms around her tightly.
Neither of them spoke while Sirius waited for Marlene to hug him back. The silence was heavy and the room seemed smaller because of it. When she finally hugged him, it was with hesitance, as if she was unsure why he was hugging rather than hexing her.
He grimaced slightly, silently berating himself for not considering how his reaction might have looked. Sirius pulled back, making sure to keep sharp eye contact with the girl whom he considered one of his best friends.
“Marls?” He started cautiously.
“Siri?” Her voice was even more hesitant, which he hadn’t initially thought was possible.
“I’m proud of you. Am I the first person you’ve told?”
She laughed slight, yet her body seemed unsure whether to chuckle or sob.
“Yes. And if everyone else is gonna react like that then I’m quitting.”
He chuckled slightly and moved back in for another hug. He mumbled something into her shirt and sighted once she started to pull back, aware she never did let him get away with anything. He always joked that Marlene loved confrontation, all except her own. Her eyebrows shot up questioning; as if proving him to continue.
“I just feel bad. I mean, the whole reason I reacted like that was that I’d zoned out while you were talking and I focused back in only for you to say the three words that had just popped into my mind.”
She looked at him again, trying to recall the last few words of her diligently prepared speech. (Marlene was nothing if not prepared, thank you Mr. Black.) Then, her eyes widened in acknowledgement.
“Merlin Sirius, are you even aware of what you just told me?”
He looked back at her confused for a moment before his grey eyes widened.
She decided to let the information sink in for a minute and hugged him even tighter than previously.
“I am curious though, what did you think I wanted to talk to you about?” She could feel him trying to pull away, but only tightened her told on the older boy.
“I…ummm.” He cleared his throat and shifted uncomfortably, still intertwined with Marlene. “I thought maybe you were gonna say you had a crush on me and then I was worried because, well, I think you’re fit and everything, but not really my type.”
She finally let him go but shifted so that they were side to side, leaning on each other slightly.
“Sorry love, but you’re not really my type either.”
The two Gryffindors stared at each other for a moment before bursting into equally loud roars of laughter.
Once the noise subsided, Marlene turned to face Sirius once again. Her face was emotionless as she asked, “so, who do you fancy then?”
He punched her playfully in the arm and snorted disbelievingly as he walked out of the dorm and into the common room.
Marlene entered a few minutes later and winked enthusiastically at Sirius as she noticed his position on the sofa with James and Remus. The latter had his book resting on top of Sirius’ legs, which were draped atop his own. While the former was playing with Sirius’ hair, carding fingers through it with the utmost ease. She surveyed them quietly, a small smile resting on her face.
They all looked happy for one reason or another. For Sirius, she was hopeful.