Chapter Text
okay, okay, here we go. hi, i’m michael aka quackingfish aka str11fe aka so many old urls and i’ll be your host for this thing where i write shit about my own fic like, on my fic. because its a year since i first posted it. woooooo! (everything i add now, in present-time will be bolded. jsyk)
Michael smirked, using his grip in Gavin’s hair to pull him closer, both to get a better angle to kiss him and to knock him off balance. He grinned into the kiss at Gavin’s little squeak of shock, shuffling backwards so that he wasn’t in danger of sliding down the stairs, even if Gavin totally was. It probably hadn’t been a good idea to sit at the top of the stairs and wait for Gavin to come up- ambushing him was dangerous enough without trying to kiss him at the same time.
this is one of my favourite things about the michael i write- he does ridiculous shit and is fully aware of the fact that he’s being fucking ridiculous and unsafe and he just. does it. michael jones, everybody
But then again, the danger was fun. (Not like living with five other dudes wasn’t dangerous enough already, especially when they were cooking.) this is another thing i love doing- linking back to off-screen shit as vaguely as possible, because that’s what people do. like, you make vague ass references to shit because you know what you’re talking about, plus it bulks out the universe with only a little work from me and allows other folks to substitute what they like best. i like doin this thing. He got to have Gavin kneeling a couple steps below where Michael was perched, craning his neck up to reach his mouth, and that was pretty fucking fantastic.
“Guys, really? On the stairs?” Geoff’s voice came from above him, and Michael tore himself away from Gavin to look up at him.
geoffrey, we all know you’ve done worse. hell, you go on to do worse in what, three chapters? four?
“Yeah, well-“ He began, cutting himself off when he saw Jack laughing from behind Geoff.
“Should I go get the hose?” Jack grinned as he pushed past Geoff and Michael to head down the stairs, giving Michael a pat on the shoulder and Gavin a quick kiss as he went by.
“Seriously, you might have to. Are you guys trying to bang on like, every surface in the house or what?”
“Well, I-“ Gavin paused, and Michael stared down at him, shaking his head and moving to stand up.
“What?” Michael frowned at Gavin, switching to grin at Geoff when he offered his hand to help him up.
“That’s not even a bad idea, you know.” Gavin said, his smile growing.
“Oh Jesus- this is gonna be good,” Geoff laughed, nudging at Gavin with a foot. “You have good ideas, you know that?”
geoff giving the credit to gavin when geoff actually came up with it is the greatest, okay? b/c i think it’s fuckin hilarious, plus it drags in all the chaos and “who said what” shit that goes down with these nerds (and i’m pretty sure nobody noticed/pointed it out to me </3)
“Yeah, it’s why you love me,”
“To be fair, it’s really just the nose,” Michael grinned, prodding at Gavin before hauling him up. “Come on, ideas need to be like, not on the stairs, idiot,”
literally one of the biggest things i’d change about this fic is the ableism. like, yes, it’s canon-typical (not as bad, really) but it’s still like. bad. and completely unnecessary. i think i started consciously trying to remove it from my writing & vocabulary at some point along this fic but???
They found Ryan in the kitchen, Gavin relieving him of the pancakes he was cooking and flopping down in his usual chair while Geoff buried his face in Michael’s neck and wrapped his arms around his waist.
“I’m just saying- I’m way better at getting laid in weird places than you,” Michael shrugged, stuffing the last of his pancake in his mouth.
now i’d probably work in more description of the food because pancakes, yo, but i think it works this way? like, ryan making them pancakes is normal, and complicated sex bets with gavin aren’t. and michael is the type to like, multitask but also suck at multitasking.
“Nah,”
“Nah?”
“You heard me- my sex life is way more exciting,”
Michael felt Geoff laughing into his shoulder, but fuck it- he would totally take the bait. gavin trying to work michael up is my absolute favourite, okay. even better is when michael realises and goes for it anyway because it’s gavin, and he loves him, and it’s funnier when he does “Fucking- you’re kidding me, right? Fine, I’ll take the bet- what’re the rules? And how much will I get when I win?”
“This should be good,” Ryan muttered quietly, turning away from his cooking to watch them.
“Should I be filming this?” Geoff hummed softly.
happy hour episode 16: whoops we’re all fucking each other
“Nah, we can just write it down, make sure Michael doesn’t back out-“
“Fuck you-”
“- and like, we should probably work out what counts as a ‘weird place’ too,”
“Not in public,”
this is one of those times where i set up rules in-universe because of Feelings about Things. like, anyone who sees them is involved in a sexual thing, likely without their consent & i didn’t want to sexualise that. like, drunk fucks in a bathroom because there’s no one else is one thing (that i have written before), but deliberately being naked in a park because you like unsuspecting strangers seeing you naked is.... nah. and i wanted to draw a more firm line than that, so, this. Michael decided, chewing on his lip, “or somewhere too dangerous,”
“We should make a list, of where counts and stuff,” Gavin tilted his head, standing up and starting to shuffle around the kitchen.
“Oh God, here we go,”
“I still think the shower shouldn’t be one of them. We’ve already banged in there like, a million times,” Michael shrugged, staring down at the poorly decorated sheet Gavin was holding up proudly.
“I don’t know man, it’s kinda adventurous, I guess- remember that one time, when you and Ryan dropped me?” Ray frowned, peering at the sheet from his spot in Ryan’s lap.again with the offscreen references- i wasn’t kidding when i said i loved this shit. plus this image was too rad to ignore- like, it encourages u to imagine what it’d be like for the three of them fucking in the shower & holding ray up somehow, which is a nice ass image, but like, the fucking hilarity and ah-ness of them dropping him makes it all like- hot/funny sex. He’d come downstairs about halfway through the list-making, and had had the genius idea to move from the kitchen to the living room where they were ‘less likely to set something on fire’.
“Well, to be fair, it was mostly Ryan’s fault,” Michael defended, biting back a smile when Ryan glared at him.
“It’s staying on, then- I’ve already written it down, anyway,” Gavin paused, grinning at Michael. “Would it be bad if we used the stickers from Go! for this?”
also v deliberate that there are the only vague-level references to actual work. i wanted that separate because some level of professionalism (ha), plus probably being too lazy to write that in
“Not if I get first pick of which type is mine,”
“Loser,” Ray interjected.
“Doubt you’ll be saying that when I’m fucking you like, in the backseat of a car,”
i didn’t do this on purpose- i had no plan at all when writing the first two chapters tbh, and then only a v vague list of who & where- but michael & ray totally end up fucking in a car and i love that
Of course, Jack walked in just after Michael shut his mouth, as if he was summoned by talk of fucking. It really wouldn’t surprise him if that was true. my michael is so fucking ridiculous sometimes and i love it “Why in a car when we have like, a bed? That would look pretty fucking hot though,”
“It’s for a bet,” Geoff supplied helpfully.
“We may or may not be trying to see who can get laid in the weirdest places,” Gavin smirked. “And I’m totally going to win,”
“What, all of you?”
“Nah, just me and Gavin- well, you guys too, me and Gav fucking doesn’t really work if we’re competing against each other to, y’know, fuck,”
fun fact: i came up with the concept for this because it’d been a while since i wrote some mavin and i wanted to fix that. so i came up with a structure that literally prevented any real mavin. gg me.
Jack shook his head, smiling and sinking down on the couch next to Geoff, who was absorbed in something on his laptop. “Sweet, I’m totally on board for that,”
“Yeah, I figured,”