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Mink-kit awoke in the middle of the night to her mother shaking her by the shoulders.
“Get up! Come help your siblings,” Roaringwind said.
Mink-kit was bleary-eyed and confused, but she happily followed her mother’s lead. Roaringwind was a fierce warrior and the entirety of PineClan looked up to her; Mink-kit was incredibly proud of her mother, and even more proud that she looked almost exactly like her, only a few differences in their black-and-white markings.
Her brothers, Bearkit and Finchkit, were tearing through a rabbit with their paws. Mink-kit was excited for a moment—were they having a late night snack?—before she realized her brothers weren’t eating. They were taking pawfuls of the rabbit’s blood and smearing it across the floor and walls of the nursing den. They both looked very unhappy and confused.
“Mommy, what’s going on?” Mink-kit asked. “I thought StarClan said we ought to respect our prey. Why—?”
“We aren’t eating it,” Roaringwind hissed. “Keep your voice down and scatter this around.”
Roaringwind pawed over a few fronds of a strange plant covered in small green berries that absolutely reeked . Though it was just a plant, it smelled like crowfood and rotten plants and cat dung all combined. Mink-kit tried to pull off the berries and squish them around, but doing this only made the smell worse. She gagged as she completed her task, but she did her best to be strong like her mother wanted her to be.
“What kind of game is this, Mommy?” Bearkit eventually asked.
“It’s…a pretend game,” their mother said after some hesitation. “We’re helping the warriors train. We’re going to pretend that we’ve been taken by a fox. We’ll hide and then they’ll come tomorrow to get us.”
Mink-kit’s eyes lit up at this news. If they were helping the warriors train, then she could show how helpful and dedicated she was to Needlestar! With renewed energy, she helped set up the scene with her brothers.
Roaringwind took big pawfuls of the rabbit’s blood and smeared them across the walls and the ceiling where her brothers couldn’t reach. She then gestured for all of them to stop and poked her head out of the hanging roots that shielded the nursing den from view.
“Quickly,” she said to her kits, “Dewlight is leaving to make her dirt. We have to be fast and quiet. Follow me!”
Roaringwind picked up the remains of the rabbit and the smelly plant, showed her kits how to wipe off their paws in the moss of their nest, and slowly crept outside of the meding den. Instead of leaving through the main entrance, though, she squeezed between the pine that sheltered the mending den and a fallen log that made up part of the camp wall. Mink-kit and her siblings hurried to follow their mother’s now frantic pace. Mink-kit could tell from the expressions on her brothers’ faces that they were frightened, but she couldn’t tell why. Didn’t they trust their mother?
They caught up with their mother near a bush a good distance away from camp, where she was digging a hole. Mink-kit instantly moved to help her, and together they dug a ditch for the rest of the rabbit. Roaringwind covered the remains in dirt and bracken, then masked the scent again with more of the stinky berries and then a PineClan scent marker. Mink-kit helped while bouncing from paw to paw, thrilled at their nighttime adventure.
“Come on!” Roaringwind whispered to them all, then grabbed Finchkit by the scruff and started trotting away. Bearkit and Mink-kit had to run at full tilt to keep up with her.
Mink-kit had rarely left camp before, and had never strayed so far away. They quickly made it through the rest of the forest, and found themselves in the starlit, frosty expanse of a tundra field. Mink-kit was fascinated by every shrub and rock they passed, but she knew that she had no time to explore just now. It was simply a tantalizing glance at everything she’d get to see as an apprentice in a few moons.
It didn’t take long for the run to become exhausting. Bearkit started lagging behind, but Roaringwind didn’t seem to notice, even when Mink-kit tried to quietly call her name. She urged her brother on anyways, worried about messing up the warriors’ training exercise. He got up with a bit of playful clawing, but he still looked exhausted and unhappy. Mink-kit’s legs burned with the effort, but she pushed through. One day, when she was a warrior, she would have to run like this all the time, so she ought to start learning how to do it now. Did it hurt like this for the older cats, too?
After what felt like forever, their mother stopped running for a moment, if only to hiss and curse at the sky. They’d moved a long way from camp, but she’d run into a large river that cut through the tundra. Far off in the distance, it looked like it pooled into a smaller lake. Mink-kit’s heart leapt with excitement; she wondered if she’d get to see that famous lake on their way, or even the Gathering Isle! She’d never been allowed to go so far from camp before!
Hissing a final curse of frustration, Roaringwind turned to look at her two other kits. Mink-kit did her best to look determined despite her exhaustion, but even with her best effort, she knew she was drooping a bit. Meanwhile, Bearkit was not much more than a lump of fuzzy black dirt beside her, collapsed and panting. Roaringwind put down Finchkit and picked up Bearkit, then turned and ran inland towards the smaller lake at the river’s end.
Mink-kit and Finchkit ran along the pebbles and gravel of the river at their mother’s heels. Mink-kit wondered if running in the water would make it more fun, but after a few pawsteps she realized it was terribly cold and just made the journey harder. Finchkit was faster than her at first, something that frustrated her, but eventually his energy faded just like Bearkit’s, and she had to urge Finchkit along with some cheering on and a few nips to the tail.
Eventually they made it to the smaller lake, more a pond than anything else, and ran around the edge and into the next section of tundra. It was flat and broad, and it looked almost endless, save for the mountains poking into the sky somewhere in the far distance. Mink-kit took a moment to look at the sight in awe. She’d never realized just how big the world was before.
“Mink-kit! Get over here, fur-for-brains!” her mother hissed. She hadn’t realized that Roaringwind had ushered her two brothers into a hole in the ground as she watched the lightening sky. Embarrassed, Mink-kit scurried into the hole.
Now that they’d arrived at their goal, Mink-kit’s strength started giving way, and she fell to the floor along with her brothers. Her paws hurt so badly, and she knew her brothers felt the same ache. She wouldn’t be able to make another trek like that. Their mother climbed down into the hole with them and sat down, also apparently catching her breath.
“Mommy….” Finchkit piped up in a hoarse voice. “Why did we go so far? I hurt all over….”
“We went far so that nobody can ever find you again,” Roaringwind answered. “You—er...we all live here now.”
“I thought…but you said i-it was for the warriors!” Mink-kit was confused and scared. “What’s going on, Mommy?”
Roaringwind sighed and looked down at her three kits. Mink-kit didn’t understand the look in her eyes, but whatever it was, it wasn’t nice.
“Do you remember what I said about your father? How he’s a powerful tom?”
The kits bobbed their heads. The topic of their father’s identity was one that the three had debated many times. Mink-kit believed that their father was Needlestar himself, but Bearkit thought it was their deputy, Longsky, and Finchkit didn’t know who he believed and flipped sides all the time.
“Well, he was a warrior of RidgeClan named Shreddedface, and now he isn’t.”
Mink-kit’s world shattered.
Her father wasn’t a PineClan cat? Wasn’t that against the rules? Did that mean she was breaking a rule…just because she’d been born? And what did Roaringwind mean that he wasn’t a warrior anymore?
“I don’t understand….” Bearkit said, trying and failing to pull himself into a sitting position. Finchkit simply lay with his big blue eyes staring up at their mother, filled with hurt.
“You all are what they call half-Clan cats. You don’t belong to any Clan by blood, and you never will. I wanted to take you to RidgeClan, but when your father admitted to your existence, he was exiled from his Clan.”
“What does that mean?”
“He got kicked out from RidgeClan, and he is never allowed back.”
“Because…because of us?” Mink-kit was tearing up, and Finchkit was already crying.
Their mother looked away and nodded. “Because of you.”
All three kits stared at their mother in shock for a long, agonizing moment, before bursting into tears. Roaringwind didn’t do anything to stop it, though she did look pointedly away. They sobbed together, Finchkit crying loudest of all, pulling his siblings into a tight pile and cuddling with them for comfort. Mink-kit felt emotions that she couldn’t even name in that moment, disgust and disbelief and utter agony. Her entire life up to this point hadn’t even mattered, and would never matter; she would never be a warrior or have kits or an apprentice. She was simply born wrong, against the rules.
Eventually, the kits ran out of energy to cry so hard, and their wails subsided into sniffles. The pale morning light was finding its way into the empty, cold hole, their new home, and shone a halo around their mother’s body, casting her face in shadow.
“Riverstar is going to tell Needlestar about you all,” she finally continued. “If you’re still in camp, they’ll keep you there and exile me. So you all have to stay here. It’s for your own good...I don’t want them raising you without me. They’d teach you to hate me…and if I can’t have you, then no one else can.” Roaringwind’s expression darkened into something hard and cruel. Mink-kit, however, wouldn’t know the word for it until much later in life: murderous .
“But you’re going to stay too, right, Mommy?” Mink-kit asked, eyes aching and nose bubbling from her long cry.
“Of…of course, Mink-kit.” Roaringwind stood. “I’m going to go hunt for us.”
“Wait, Mommy, I’m thirsty,” Finchkit finally spoke, trying to crawl towards her on limp legs. “Can I have some milk before you go, pretty please?”
Roaringwind backed away from her kit as if he was a prowling fox.
“Y-you can have some later,” she said, “when I get back.”
“But, Mommy, my throat hurts. Just a little?”
“Please, Mommy,” Bearkit joined in, tripping over his paws. “I’m real hungry from running…. We can be fast—”
“Stay away!” Roaringwind hissed, scrabbling out of the den. The three kits froze in fear, unsure of what they’d done wrong. Mink-kit looked up at her mother in disbelief. She’d never hissed at them before.
“Do not leave this den, no matter what,” Roaringwind said frantically. “There are wolves and foxes everywhere. If you go back to any of the Clans, they will kill you for being half-Clan, no matter what. Just…just stay right there and don’t move!”
With that, Roaringwind took off, and the three kits were alone.
Finchkit slipped into hysterics again, calling out for their mother, while Bearkit tried and failed to scrabble up the edge of the hole to follow her. But Mink-kit stayed put, partially wanting to be obedient, but also knowing that with their weak limbs and empty stomachs, they’d never be able to keep up with their mother for a second time.
She didn’t come back.
After the second day, it was clear that their mother wasn’t coming back. Bearkit kept saying that she left them forever, but Mink-kit and Finchkit insisted that she must have been hurt while she was hunting. They didn’t have much energy to argue, though; they were all getting hungrier by the minute, and with the boredom of their new home on top of that, the time went by slowly and silently.
After nearly four days, Mink-kit had had enough. If this wasn’t a test of her warrior skills, she didn’t know what else could be.
It was the middle of the night, but the three didn’t sleep very well alone, cold, and scared in a strange place. Mink-kit stood up and immediately caught the attention of her brothers.
“I’m going to go find Mommy,” Mink-kit announced, her voice hoarse with thirst.
“She’s gone, Mink-kit,” Bearkit hissed with what little voice he had. “She won’t come back. She just didn’t wanna get in lots of trouble and have to give us up.”
“Then I’ll find a new Mommy!” she snapped back. “We’re all so tired and hungry, someone will help us if we find them.”
“But the Clan cats will kill us,” Finchkit said. “Didn’t you hear Mommy say that?”
Mink-kit pulled her ears back. He was right, but she held out hope that someone, anyone would take pity on them. Maybe there were cats that didn’t have Clans, just like them? Maybe they could help? After all, they’d just learned that the world had more places than just the Clan territories. Maybe some cats were there too?
“I have to try,” Mink-kit concluded. “I’ll bring back help, I promise.”
“You’ll get hurt,” Bearkit said. “There are foxes and wolves!”
“It’s nighttime! They’re probably all sleeping, right?”
“I guess…. I’ll keep Finchkit safe. Come back quick!”
Nodding at her siblings, Mink-kit steeled her nerves for the journey.
Mink-kit padded over to the steep incline that led outside and made a few poor attempts at jumping up, then bundled all her strength into her back legs and launched herself as far up as she could go. She hit the wall with a grunt, but managed to scramble the rest of the way up the slope, exhausted and weak but still standing. She took one last look at her brothers, bundled together in the middle of the hole and cheering weakly for her successful jump, and then padded out into the tundra.
The snow was much deeper than the frost that had covered the ground a few days ago, and soon Mink-kit found herself floundering forward up to her neck in the cold white powder. The wind was deafening and the snow blasted into her eyes and nose, but she knew that she was her brothers’ last hope. She had to keep going.
“Mommy? Moooooommy! Mommy! Roaringwind? Anybody, please come and help!” she cried out into the wind, but her voice was so small and scratchy that the wind seemed to blow it away.
“Mommy? Anybody…. StarClan?”
Mink-kit looked up into the night sky, and with horror realized that the stars were gone. She would later learn that bad snow storms could cover up Silverpelt for a time, and that they always came back, but her young, inexperienced mind couldn’t understand this, having never seen it before. To Mink-kit, it looked as if her ancestors had abandoned her. The sky was completely, utterly, horrifically empty.
“Well hey there, little kit! What are you doing out here?”
Mink-kit jolted in surprise and swung her head around. A beefy tom was looming over her, his fluffy grey pelt criss-crossed with awful jagged scars. It seemed like he was being friendly, though, so Mink-kit put her first impression aside to beg for his help.
“Hello! Please, I need help. My mommy took me and my brothers here and then she didn’t come back. I think she might be hurt! Can you help me find her? We’re all really hungry and scared without her!”
“Oh, little kit,” the tom said in a slow, rumbly drawl, “your mother’s almost certainly dead. Can’t you tell that?”
Mink-kit’s stomach dropped, but she steadied herself and tried to be brave.
“O-okay… can you still help us? I came all the way out here to find help.”
Instead of saying anything to her, the tom squinted at her, as if sizing her up for something. She realized this and squared her shoulders, trying to impress him instinctually.
“What’s your name, little kit? Mine’s Thorn.”
“I’m Mink-kit!”
“Ugh. We can fix that later. You’re a pretty tough one, though, aren’t you? Not even crying after I told you your mother’s dead. Impressive.”
“I-I already thought that might’ve happened,” Mink-kit confessed, holding back the sorrow that jumped up in her. If Thorn liked that she was tough, maybe he’d help her if she kept acting tough?
“Do you want to learn how to fight, Mink-kit? How to be stronger and braver than any other cat in the tundra? Because out here, you’ll need to keep being tough like that to survive.”
Mink-kit nodded hard and her head spun. Was Thorn going to take them in?
“Good. I like seeing good fighters start young. I think you’ll be a welcome addition to the Ferals in due time.”
Without warning, Thorn picked Mink-kit up by the scruff and started walking off with her.
“Hey! Wait! We have to go get my brothers!” Mink-kit cried, trying to writhe out of his grip.
“Oh, little kit, your brothers are probably already dead, too. You’re still pretty naive, aren’t you? There isn’t room for family when you’re trying to survive. They’re just more mouths to feed. I’m taking one of you, and that’s already asking a lot!”
“But I don’t want them to die!”
“Would you rather die along with them?”
Thorn tightened his grip in Mink-kit’s scruff, and she definitely felt his teeth break some skin. Now terrified and at the mercy of a bigger, stronger cat, Mink-kit realized that she’d gotten herself into trouble. He was going to take her far away, and by the time she managed to get back to her brothers (if she ever did) it would be too late. She was too weak to fight back and would probably be killed if she even tried to get away. She would never be able to keep her promise to her brothers.
Worst of all, she realized with a growing sense of despair, this was likely the best possible outcome. Someone was taking pity on her, a weak, useless, half-Clan abomination, cast out of the Clans and abandoned by StarClan itself.
And in that moment, contemplating what fate had done to her in just a few days’ time, something sinister and wicked planted a seed in the young kit’s heart.