Work Text:
Kaminari Denki is jealous of the new guy. Well, he’s not exactly the new guy anymore, it’s been two years. It’s just...Kaminari joined the company in July and Todoroki joined in December of that year, so when he joined in Kaminari’s head he was ‘new guy’ and ‘new guy’ he’ll be, probably forever. Or at least until (if/when) they go under and Kaminari is forced to buy a suit again and go interview at some other place.
He explains as much to Shinsou, who joined in August of that year, and is therefore one of the old crowd, like him.
The purple haired man just stares at him though, looking perpetually tired. “If you say so.”
He frowns. Shinsou doesn’t seem to get where he’s coming from. He never does, when Kaminari looks on longingly at Todoroki and wants what he has. Like the easy way that he seems to interact with the boss, Midoriya, without even trying. Todoroki just quietly hangs around, and Midoriya comes to him, and throws an arm around his shoulder and laughs his jingle-like laugh and Todoroki definitely is getting a raise this year. What with the way Midoriya likes him so much. This is the worst. The absolute worst.
‘Midoriya likes everyone’ is what Shinsou has to say to that, with a yawn, which is so offensive!
Then there’s Todoroki’s work ethic and performance. He somehow manages to be both extremely diligent about the details, and then big picture enough to make big points during meetings. Showing up everyone, including their lead analysts, Yaoyorozu Momo and Tenya Iida. When he stands up and speaks, everyone listens. People listen when Kaminari talks too, but ever since he led the team into a failed project (or two) in his entry year, he knows there gotta be whispers about him being a ‘ditz’ or a dunce. Nobody whispers like that about Todoroki.
‘No one’s ever said that to me about you’ Shinsou points out whenever he brings that up. Which is just...a bad reference point, since he’s sure that besides him, nobody gossips with Shinsou anyway. It seems like exactly the kind of thing Shinsou wouldn’t like or have time for. Being here to prove himself in the industry and all that. Plus his cool, aloof attitude probably makes people think he wouldn’t care to be told who’s an idiot or who’s not. Shinsou might already think that Kaminari is an idiot, probably, and doesn’t care. Which is a consolation if nothing else. Even though it super hurts too, because if Shinsou thinks he’s an idiot, it’s probably true.
Then there’s the way Todoroki looks. He’s so handsome. Not in the way that Kaminari digs, personally. Kaminari definitely likes girls, and Todoroki is a guy, but he is pretty. Or at least, people think so. Personally, if he did like guys, he’d probably prefer more tall, dark and handsome rather than the pretty-handsome that Todoroki is-because if he did like guys, that kinda guy would be way more cool. No offense to Todoroki. Or maybe, a little offense, since the man clearly has everything in the bag.
“He’s even more of a looker than you! Ya know-conventionally and all that,” he tells Shinsou, as he’s pacing the copy room and pouting. “How’s that fair?”
Shinsou actually looks up from his black-coffee (‘dark like my soul’ he said once, with a straight face and Kaminari couldn’t tell if it was a joke) at that pronouncement, “Huh?”
“I said he’s good looking and it’s not fair. He has great numbers every quarter and he has half the girls in the department after him because of how good he looks,” Kaminari says glumly. “I know I act super cool and above it and I am mostly-but it’d be nice. Ya know? If someone asked me if I’d like to have coffee or something.”
At this, inexplicably, Shinsou holds his cup out to where Kaminari is standing, “You want a sip?”
“I can’t drink that!” he says, scandalized. “I’d need at least three packets of sugar, some milk, and some caramel syrup to save it first.”
“Mm,” Shinsou replies, his expression inscrutable.
That was weird, Kaminari thinks, then remembers his subject. “Right, Todoroki…”
“Have you ever talked to him?” Shinsou raises one eyebrow, clearly aching to escape the copy room, and Kaminari’s clutches. The betrayal.
“Why would I talk to him?” he wails.
“Because,” the other man takes a long sip, as if he’s steeling himself for something. “It’s possible that you might actually like him.”
“I don’t not like him,” Kaminari protests. “I’m way too chill for that.”
“You complain about him every day,” Shinsou smirks. Kaminari hates when he does that, because it makes him look even more handsome, and Kaminari doesn’t have anyone to complain to about the fact that Shinsou is handsome. So it’s just inconvenient. “Could have fooled me.”
That’s why Kaminari decides to approach him. To prove Shinsou wrong. Because he’s clearly great friends with everyone in the office. That includes Todoroki. Just because he’s jealous sometimes, doesn’t mean he doesn’t like him. Kaminari is not that kind of guy.
He’s late today though. Todoroki is late, and Kaminari lingers around his desk, waiting for him to come. So he can say ‘good morning, Todoroki-san’ and Shinsou, who has a clear sight line to here, can see him having this conversation, and can be proven wrong later, when Kaminari goes and owns him in the copy room. Kaminari’s role at the company is more publicity than analyst now, so he’s always making a shit-load of copies. Why Shinsou needs that many copies, as an analyst, is beyond him, but he always runs into him in the copy room around three, which is when Kaminari makes his daily copies. So it always works out.
While he’s waiting for Todoroki to show he notices Todoroki’s phone on the desk. Which means that he’s not late, because why would Mr. Perfection ever be late? He suppresses a groan. Because he knows that would be childish. And he hasn’t done a childish thing in years if you don’t count the antics he and Sero pulled at last year’s Halloween party, or the summer picnic, or just-if you don’t count anything he’s ever done with Sero at all. Ever.
Todoroki is not late. Clearly. He arrived at some point, early, and left his phone here to go into a meeting or something. Huh. The lock screen background is a blurry picture. Someone has thrust their hand out in front of the camera at the last second, to block themselves from the shot. You can still sort of see them though. They have blonde hair, you can tell that much.
Kaminari means to leave now, he really does. He isn’t a snoop. But then the phone buzzes and a message pops up. From someone called ‘tsuki ❤️’.
tsuki ❤️ (07:13):
Why the fuck arent u texting me back?
tsuki ❤️ (07:13):
Do i need to show u what ur gonna be missing?
tsuki ❤️ (07:13):
Fine then
tsuki ❤️ (07:14):
Ifyouwantthis.jpg
tsuki ❤️ (07:14):
Everagain.jpg
tsuki ❤️ (07:14):
Bettertextmeback.jpg
Oh my god. Kaminari is frozen speechless. In addition to everything else he has going that Kaminari doesn’t, Todoroki Shouto also has a blonde wife/girlfriend who sends him probably sexy pics during the workday. Plus, knowing how Todoroki looks, she’s probably smokin’ hot to match. Now that’s just unfair.
*
“I don’t know why I didn’t notice before,” Kaminari sighs overdramatically. “He even wears a ring!”
“Who?” Shinsou asks, changing an ink cartridge in the printer.
“Who else?” he crosses his arms over his chest. Come on, Shinsou, keep up. “You’re not listening to me? So not cool.”
What does he need to do, he huffs internally, send sexy pics like ‘tsuki ❤️’ in order to get someone’s attention?
“I’m sorry, I thought you were talking about how you figured out someone has a hot, blonde wife,” Shinsou stands up and stares at him, confused.
“I am, I’m talking about Todoroki’s hot, blonde wife!”
Then Shinsou laughs. He actually laughs, which he doesn’t do that often. He does sort of smile, from time to time, at Kaminari’s jokes. It’s very teethy, and not really the way most people smile, but Kaminari is proud of how often he can bring it out and no one else can. (Shinsou isn’t really a people person.) He doesn’t laugh like this though, all the way up to his eyes. What’s he finding so funny about this?
“What?” Kaminari demands. “Come on, man. Spill.”
“He doesn’t have a wife,” Shinsou explains, “He has a-”
Kaminari cuts him off. “No, I saw it!”
“You saw it?” Shinsou pauses, suddenly concerned. “You saw Todoroki with this woman?”
“Well, no, I didn’t see it,” Kaminari confesses. “But what else could it be? Someone was texting him today, and it was obviously steamy. Then, there’s his lunch, who’s always making that, huh?”
Kaminari thinks back to what he sees Todoroki eating in the cafeteria. Meticulously portioned homemade bento. Perfectly arranged rice, decorated with a smattering of furikake, sometimes in cute little patterns. Perfectly steamed vegetables, deliciously cooked pork-belly, the smell of which has often wafted over to where he and Shinsou sit and made him practically drool. Yeah, why didn’t he pick up on that before? ‘tsuki ❤️’ is a great cook, and so sweet on Todoroki too, obviously. She never misses a single day. It’s always packed so nice and neat. She even makes interesting, non-Bento lunches too. A container of mapo tofu appeared in Todoroki’s lunch once. Dan-dan noodles. Seafood udon. Damn it, now he’s hungry just thinking about it!
Shinsou sighs, and his palm hits his face. “You really don’t think you could have mistakenly assumed anything about this? Anything at all?”
“No,” he focuses, really trying here, “I think I got it. I mean, someone’s making him lunch, and texting him all the time, and he wears a ring, what else could it be?”
The other man looks disappointed for a moment, which is a new look for him. Kaminari does a lot of stupid shit, and he’s sure his frequent rants can be annoying. But Shinsou has never looked at him, disappointed, before.
“I think,” Shinsou strokes his own chin. “I think I’ll wait for you to figure it out. I know that you can.”
Now that is more familiar, Kaminari feels relieved. Shinsou always believes in him. Even over the stupidest things. His goal to one day get employee of the month. His ambition for a corner cubicle near the window. His dream of going back to college for his master’s, so he can get a job that he really likes, even though it means leaving the squad, and Shinsou behind. Even if most people don’t really think of him as the smart, or academic type. Shinsou believes in him for every bit of it.
So if there is something here, about Todoroki and his smoking hot wife, that he’s missing. If Shinsou thinks he can get it, then Kaminari definitely will.
*
“Hey!” he finds Todoroki after work lingering near the bus stop, but not quite at the bus stop. He figures that Todoroki will be available, presumably, until the bus comes and sweeps him off home to his hot wife and all the sex that he’s having that Kaminari, tragically, isn’t.
“Hello,” Todoroki greets him.
Kaminari stands next to him, trying to be as casual as possible. “So, you’re married, huh?”
“Yes,” Todoroki confirms.
They haven’t actually had that many outside-of-work conversations. So this was probably a weird thing to lead with. It’s just...he hasn’t had any luck trying to figure this out on his own. He needs the help and Todoroki is always nice enough whenever Kaminari needs help finding something, or getting an important fax number at work. He’s not a bad guy. Not at all, Kaminari is discovering slowly, as his jealousy thaws. If he seems standoffish it's just him being sort of awkward. If he seems mean, he’s just being blunt.
Kaminari feels a little bad, on some level, for thinking about him as ‘new guy’ out of spite for so long. Now he’s just...Todoroki.
“Nice. How is that going? Feels good, I bet?” he asks. Surely, this question will help to clear up whatever Shinsou said that he’s clearly missing about the whole Mrs. Todoroki situation.
“Kaminari, are you trying to get married?”
“No, I’m not-I was just-maybe one day. I’d like to,” he doesn’t know why he’s spilling all of this to Todoroki, but he just keeps going, “I mean look at your lunch, it’s always amazing.”
“I can send you the recipes, I can never get them right, but you can try it if you want,” Todoroki says, sincerely. Because on top of it all, he really is a good guy isn’t he. Kaminari wants to scream. Or sob. He’s going through a lot, honestly.
“Not the food, though. Like, the way the food is made just for you. I want someone to do things just for me, that they don’t do for anyone else. Listen to my problems and stuff. And I'd do it for them too! I’d love something like that. Preferably someone hot, but they don’t even have to be, like super hot or anything, just good looking, you know, to me.”
He can’t believe he just gave this speech to Todoroki. He was here to get some answers but now he’s just kinda sad all of a sudden, and his head is gonna explode and he feels stupid and gaaahhh at the same time. Apparently Todoroki is unfazed though. His wife seemed to have kind of a potty mouth, over text, maybe he’s used to people who are a lot. Kaminari knows he can be a lot, he’s been told that, a lot (ha).
“I think everyone eventually finds something like that, if they want it,” Todoroki says, thoughtfully.
“You do?” he gulps. It’s sort of nice to hear that. Even if he’s not sure if he believes it.
Todoroki nods. “Sometimes you find it where you might not expect it. That’s what happened to me.”
Kaminari isn’t sure what exactly he means by this, but he considers it. Then swallows down his emotions and remembers why he came. “What is it like though, the marriage?”
“I’ve never thought about describing it,” Todoroki admits.
“Could you try?” he asks, knowing he sounds kind of desperate.
Todoroki seems to consider this. Then he’s quiet for a few moments, and he even looks like he’s processing something.
When he finally talks all he says is, “I guess it is like getting to be with your best friend all the time.”
Kaminari tries in vain to correlate this answer with something super duper important he could have missed. But nah, nothing.
“Ok, well, thanks for answering, have a good bus ride!”
“I’m not taking the bus,” Todoroki says, confused.
“Uh, well have a good day anyway?”
“You too,” Todoroki says.
Then Kaminari turns, and walks away. He does have a bus stop to get to, and it’s not this one. He hears the sound of a motorcycle in the distance, and it gets closer and closer. It’s some guy in all-black and a red helmet. The bike is all black too, with orange accents, and it shines in the sun, and Kaminari’s jaw almost drops because it looks so fucking cool. He doesn’t have time to gawk though, not today, so he fixes his gaze straight ahead, and puts in his earbuds, choosing a song that might make him feel like the main character in his own music video. Just like he likes. By the time he’s walked about a block or two in the other direction, he looks back around to see if Todoroki is still standing there waiting (for something).
Todoroki isn’t there.
*
The turning point in Kaminari’s struggle is when they’re assigned to work together on a project. A big project. One that Midoriya-san apologizes over and over again for assigning them. When it’s clearly the work of three people.
That’s why they’re both the last ones in the office, on a Friday night. There’s still a lot to do though. Hey, at least they get paid overtime.
“It’s late,” Todoroki says, when he looks out the window. They made Midoriya-san leave, even though he wanted to stay with them since they were staying late. As a compromise, he insisted they work in his office.
“Yeah, guess so,” Kaminari remarks back.
“Do you want to finish up at my apartment?” Todoroki asks. “I live in the city, it’ll be easy for you to commute back.”
That’s how he ends up walking to the bus stop with Todoroki, while Todoroki calls ‘tsuki ❤️’ and explains everything.
“Don’t come pick me up, Kaminari is coming over,” Todoroki says into the phone.
Pause.
“No, we won’t fit all three. I’ll see you at home.”
Pause. Fit all three? Kaminari wonders. Most cars fit three people. Unless Mrs. Todoroki drives a fancy ass sports car that only fits two. The thought of a very pretty blonde woman in a sports car is kind of nice.
“Yes, he’ll need to eat.”
Pause.
Todoroki sighs. “I know you don’t hate me. I’m sorry for the short notice. I love you.”
Kaminari has no idea what that was about. Was Todoroki’s wife mad at him or something?
*
They’re at Todoroki’s door, after climbing three flights of stairs, when Kaminari finally realizes he should ask, “Is your wife really okay with this?”
Todoroki opens the door, then pauses. “My what?”
“Hey halfie, you’re lucky I was gonna make extra so we could have it for lunch tomorrow anyway, you and your piece of shit coworker can eat whenever,” he hears a voice carry from the other room. A male voice. “You took so long and I was starving, so I didn’t wait up.”
Kaminari takes off his shoes, and steps into Todoroki’s living room, in a daze. Did he hear that right?
Then the man himself enters the room too, and addresses him directly. “Hey, you better like katsudon, cause it’s all you’re gonna get.”
He’s blonde. He’s blonde. Him. Kaminari’s life flashes before his eyes. Is 'tsuki ❤️' this man? With well-muscled arms like that, and yeah, as expected he’s hot but-
“Katsuki, be more welcoming,” Todoroki chides, as he comes in and kisses this man on the cheek, then spares a glance at Kaminari. “This is Bakugou.”
The kiss spreads a red blush across this man’s cheeks, and he huffs and looks away. “Tsch. I’m being plenty fucking welcoming.”
Bakugou Katsuki. Tsuki ❤️ == Katsuki. Ka-tsu-ki. He feels numbers and symbols float in the air in front of him. He’s figuring it out. Shinsou. This was what Shinsou was-the numbers float around in the air and form equations. Todoroki Shouto is gay or at least likes men, and he has a husband.
This, this person is-
“Hey, Shou, does he always look like that, I think he’s gonna short-circuit,” Bakugou says.
“Are you alright?” Todoroki asks.
“You don’t have a wife,” is all Kaminari can say at the moment. He’s still in shock.
Bakugou is the first to get it, bursting out into laughter, while Todoroki just looks on, increasingly confused.
“You-really fucking thought,” Bakugou points to Todoroki, “That limp wrist over there is fucking straight-oh-god-I can’t believe-”
At that, Todoroki finally gets it. “You thought I was married...to a woman.”
Yeah, he feels like an idiot.
*
Dinner is mortifying. Not because of the food. The food is amazing. It’s just...first impressions stick. Apparently, Bakugou likes to give everyone nicknames. And his is now sparkplug because of the way he short-circuited when he discovered that Bakugou was in-fact a guy, and Todoroki, who is apparently ‘gay as shit’, was in-fact, a lover of men. Sure, Bakugou apparently already ate, but he joins them anyway, purely to give him shit about it. Jerk.
He probably deserves it. That doesn’t prevent him from trying to get Bakugou back, by saying, “I know that you sext him at work!”
“Hah?! What the hell? I don’t do that.”
“But I saw on Todoroki's phone, I wasn’t, like snooping, But I was at his desk waiting for him. The messages, it was a long time ago-but-”
“I’d never pull that shit during work hours, I gotta job too ya know.”
“Then, what are the pictures of?”
“NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS!” Bakugou says, at the same time that Todoroki replies, “Soba.”
Yeah, turns out there’s a lot about Todoroki Shouto that he didn’t know.
He figures out most of it during the next few weeks, as they put in loads of hours on weekends, and late night weeknights so that they can deliver this. They want to, mostly for Midoriya, who puts his life on the line, sometimes literally, carrying their team forward and making sure through all the budget cuts, no one ever gets fired.
They mostly do their overtime work at Todoroki and Bakugou’s place. For the food, on some level, and because Todoroki lives in the city, and Kaminari doesn’t.
He learns about the fact that the reason Todoroki is so friendly with Midoriya is because they were friends in high school. The reason he’s so good at what he does is because he had a much higher ranking job, once, at his father’s company, and then left. His dad was this horrible guy, apparently, or he seems like it, because whenever he’s brought up in conversation Bakugou cusses even more than usual and really seems to hate the guy. Even more than Todoroki himself, sometimes.
He even asks about the scar, the really obvious one on his eye. That story hurts most of all to hear, and he’s not quite sure what to say after, and is glad that Bakugou is also here, to make things less awkward by yelling at him and calling him a dumb sparkplug.
Kaminari still hasn’t told Shinsou that he figured it out. It’s been kind of awkward between them, lately, and he doesn’t know why. He didn’t really realize it, before, but they’d sort of gotten close. In the copy room everyday. Shinsou isn’t really a people person, but he always went the extra mile for Kaminari, clearly, because he doesn’t any more. As much. He wanders around with his head down, and a grey scarf wrapped around his neck. As if he’s pondering something hopeless.
It’s when it clicks for him that he’s lost something with Shinsou, that he stops learning new things about Todoroki, and starts figuring out some things about himself. He’s still jealous, on some level, because man or not, Bakugou is still hot, and clearly Todoroki’s closest friend. What they have is nice, even if they yell at each other a lot (somewhat one-sidedly). They always linger around each other, and look at each other like they're keeping a secret only they know. He feels like he’s intruding, always, when they kiss goodnight, when Bakugou goes to bed. They’ve got something going and it's sort of great.
Could he have that?
He imagines a best friend he could stand spending that much time with, and Sero’s face pops up in his mind. It’s just...that’s not quite right. Is it? The softness is missing there, the unspoken understanding. Sero and him have a lot of spoken understanding, they love to talk. They get into a lot of trouble too, and it’s always fun as hell. It’s just not...like that. Like Bakugou coming in at 11:30, seeing that Todoroki already fell asleep on the couch, brushing aside his bangs and kissing him on the forehead, momentarily forgetting that Kaminari was there.
When he thinks of best friend again all he sees is purple hair, and purple eyes. But he’s not gay, is he? He likes women, or he thought he did, but…
Shinsou always knew what to say. He doesn’t make that many copies anymore, and Kaminari starts to figure out that maybe he never did. After all, when he was there in that room, with Kaminari, he was never making copies. Kaminari didn’t notice that though, he was so busy talking to him to notice that he wasn’t even carrying something to make copies of. Sure, he fiddled with the printer sometimes but- no. Shinsou was hanging around there for him.
Then that one time, when Shinsou had awkwardly stood by his side, and offered him a coffee, looking so tired, “Enough sugar to kill someone dead, and a shot of caramel syrup.”
All that. Huh. His brain freezes again. Freeze. Unfreeze. As it tries to piece through it. He nearly gives himself a headache, but then he remembers what Shinsou told him one time, when he was panicking over a presentation he had to give. 'Breathe, okay?'
It’s not like he’s never wanted to kiss Shinsou, he realizes, some days, when he looks particularly off-limits to everyone else. When he’s smirking. He’s thought, quietly, about whether it’d be chill or not if he called him Hitoshi, ever. Nah. Not that. Too weird. Toshi. That’d sound right. Not Toshi ❤️ though, ever, cause he’s a simp but he’s not a simp as hard as Todoroki is.
spark_plug ⚡(22:08):
guys i think might be bi
spark_plug ⚡ (22:08):
no, i think i def am
king_explosion_murder (22:10):
Congrats ur the fucking last to kno
soba_lover (22:12):
I’m glad you figured this out about yourself. It must feel nice.
spark_plug ⚡(22:14):
omg man ur so wholesome thx it does feel v good
king_explosion_murder (22:15):
hes not wholesome hes a menace its just looks tht way bc he texts like a grandpa
soba_lover (22:16):
Betrayal.
spark_plug ⚡(22:18):
wait how did u guys know
king_explosion_murder (22:20):
please. purple head right?
spark_plug ⚡(22:21):
what how did YOU kno
soba_lover (22:22):
I tell him everything that happens at work. You do spend a lot of time staring at him. I think he likes you too, no one needs that many copies. You should just confess.
spark_plug⚡ (22:24):
u kno wht i think i will
The next day, he brings his new found knowledge, and heart on his sleeve, to Shinsou’s desk. His hopefully-future-boyfriend is sleeping, or pretending to be asleep, and the black-coffee sits mostly full on a stack of papers an inch thick. “Hey.”
Shinsou looks up, and damn he is handome isn’t he? Even though he obviously hasn’t slept in days, and looks like it. His hair is all wind-tousled and perfect. He’d probably look even better on Bakugou’s motorcycle than Bakugou does. He has dark-circles, sure, and faded scars on his cheeks probably from acne in his teens, but he looks good. He looks good to Kaminari.
“Why are you here?” Shinsou asks.
“I figured it out!” Kaminari announces.
“Let’s hear it.”
“I’m bi and I like you,” Kaminari says, “I think you like me too, either that or you just really dig copy machines.”
“Oh,” he continues. “I also figured out that Todoroki is gay, but that’s kind of a side story, and the main thing is-I like you.”
“I like you too,” Shinsou admits. Then Kaminari thinks the moment is right, and leans in, and gets stopped with a solid hand on his chest. What? This is not how any of his good-outcome daydreams went.
“I’m not kissing you in the office,” Shinsou says, and he’s-yeah-he’s doing that thing where he scratches at the back of his neck, and looks all shy. Oh huh. That’s cute. Kaminari kind of loves it.
This is also good, because it doesn’t rule out outside-the-office kissing, which he really wants to try and do.
“After work then,” he says, then sprints back to his desk to finish up as quickly as humanly possible. He spots Todoroki and waves to get his attention and shoots him a thumbs up.
Then shoots him a text.
brand_new_bi_sexual (11:13):
Tell tsuki ❤️ i did it