Chapter Text
When Peter first started spending time with the Avengers outside of the suit, it was right after the so graciously dubbed “civil war.” Peter had moved into the tower full time, trying to squeeze into their routine, because May moved away for work. When Peter moved in, tensions were still running high, and while Peter was involved in very few of those problems directly, because he was the youngest and the newest, he was the one that the team picked on in order to try to lighten the spirits.
Now the team never meant any harm, things were just tense, and people tried to use humour to lighten the mood, Peter just often ended up as the butt of the joke. It didn’t help that, on the rare occasion that somebody said something that was too far, no one said anything to defend Peter, as nobody really wanted to disagree with each other unnecessarily, as they were all still trying to be polite and walk on ice around each other.
It started out fairly innocently, Peter had just finished a particularly hard essay for his history class which happened to be about the history of weapons, in particular bows and archers. Peter finished the essay, came out of his room and found Clint in the living room. He started talking to him about the lesson animatedly. Clint was listening, infact, Clint was one of the few people in the tower who never used Pete as the joke, always enjoyed his company, he missed seeing his kids at home and liked having a kid around the tower. However, Clint and Peter were not the only people in the room, the rest of the Avengers were in the room as well, sitting in awkward silence because no one else could think of a topic to talk about, so they all inserted themselves into Peter and Clint's conversation.
Sam sensed the tension and tried to crack a joke, “god, does the kid ever stop talking.”
His tone was light, obviously he didn’t mean any offence, in fact, most of the team really liked the kid, felt the most comfortable around him, it was part of the reason they were okay joking about him. However, Peter still felt out of place, in his mind, he was some random kid with powers, and he was living with super important Avengers. The comment made him worry that he was annoying them, that they wanted him to be quiet.
His insecurity only worsened when the other Avengers went along with the joke, not realising that it was upsetting Peter.
“Not that I know of,” Tony laughed, giving the other Avengers permission to start laughing, which they did.
Peter let out a few strained laughs as well, before making up some excuse about some extra homework and disappearing to his room, leaving his conversation with Clint unfinished.
Clint and Nat shared a glance after Peter left, both superspies could pick a lie out of anywhere, and Peter wasn’t a particularly good liar, at that point anyway, however both superspies dropped it in favour of enjoying the slightly lighter atmosphere.
When Peter reached his room, he repeated the scenario in his head. He didn’t want to annoy the Avengers, or have them think he was just a kid, so he vowed to talk less around the Avengers, only speak when he needed to.
He decided to create a list of things he needed to do to improve himself.
Improve Peter Parker;
- Talk less around the Avengers
- Don’t go on unnecessary rants
The next situation happened one morning at breakfast, it was a Sunday and the team decided to re-introduce an old tradition, which meant that Sunday morning’s became a big ‘family’ breakfast. The word family was being used lightly, while it had gotten much better, they weren’t at the point yet. Steve had cooked a big feast for everyone in the tower, with 8 people in the tower, 3 of which had enhanced metabolism, a lot of food needed to be cooked.
Everyone once again fell into a weird silence while they ate their food. Steve got up and gave him and Bucky a second helping before offering seconds to everyone else, which Peter accepted.
Tony took this as an opportunity to make another joke, since no one in the tower seemed to have any other healthy communication methods.
“With 3 enhanced in the tower, you guys might just eat me out of my money.”
It was a joke, that’s all it was, everyone else in the room laughed, but Peter was horrified. He had already come from a place of low income, he had always had to make sure that he wasn’t eating more than he needed to. What had made him think that he could come into someone else's house and just eat all the food he wanted there. He swallowed down his horror and tried to appear fine. Laughing along with the rest of the group.
Natasha, who had noticed Peter’s brief mental assault on himself, and who had also struggled with food in the past, decided to say something. Just something small, and nothing direct and also worded into the joke, because, beautiful communication skills, in hopes to provide Peter some comfort.
“Oh please Tony,” she joked, “you could afford 30 enhanced if you wanted to.”
Tony laughed again, “yeah, I could.” he agreed.
Whilst the atmosphere was much lighter, and most of the team was able to fall into easy conversation, Peter was still horrified. Once again, he vowed to change for the better of the team, he still wasn’t talking as much, not that anyone had noticed yet, and he also decided not to eat as much. He decided that he was just going to match his portion to Sams, who was a standard individual, sure he only needed about half of what Peter needed, but Peter also wasn’t going on patrol as much, only 3 times a week compared to every night, so he would be fine. Right.
He added it to the list.
Improve Peter Parker;
- Talk less around the Avengers
- Don’t go on unnecessary rants
- Don’t spend unnecessary money
- Only eat the amount an unenhanced would need
The third time came about 2 months after Peter first moved in. The word family was being used much more freely, just a family that Peter didn’t really feel a part of. All the other Avengers had fallen into an easy rhythm, now enjoying each other's company. They also invited Peter to do things with them, but he tried to stay out of their way, not wanting to annoy them by talking too much. This time, the comment was made in a conversation that Peter wasn’t meant to hear.
He had just come home from patrol early, he had just had to talk down a person from suicide, and after talking to the teen, everything had hit a bit close to home. The teenager was around Peter's age, he was upset because he felt like everyone he got close to died, and thought that everyone would be better off if he was gone. The reasoning looked way too much like a mirror for Peter, and it didn’t help that his parents 10 year death anniversary was only 3 days away. So, Peter decided to head home and then made his way to the living room craving some company, even if he was just going to sit in silence and watch the other Avengers talk amongst themselves. He was just about to enter the room when his enhanced senses picked up what they were talking about. He heard his name and paused at the door.
“What does everyone think about letting Peter come on some simple missions?” Nat asked the group.
“I don’t know Nat, he’s still a child, he should get to do teenager stuff.” Clint rebutted,
“No, God no, not mandatory, but we can give him a choice, open the offer.” Nat cleared up,
Peter smiled, he liked that idea, then people started disagreeing,
“No,” Tony stated plainly, “he hasn’t got enough experience”
Sam agreed, “yeah, going from getting cats out of trees to fighting actual threats is a big change.”
“I have spared him on more than one occasion and he can hold his own.” Bucky stepped in, “and I wasn’t exactly pulling my punches.”
“Sorry Buck, I agree with Tony” Peter heard Steve say, “it's not just physical experience, it’s also what he is ready for mentally, he won’t be able to withstand the pressure on the field. Plus, by no fault of his, he isn’t able to train as much as the rest of us. He has school and he knows that he has to put that before Spiderman, which he has been doing, well.”
“Okay, just an idea.” Natasha said, before the team quickly moved on from the topic and instead started sharing stories of past missions together, laughing at the memories.
Peter backed away from the door and fled to his room.
That’s all the Avengers thought he was. A child. He was nothing more than a child, they were right, Peter wasn’t training enough, his problems were all stupid, the Avengers had all gone through so much more than him. He had more things to change about himself.
Improve Peter Parker;
- Talk less around the Avengers
- Don’t go on unnecessary rants
- Don’t spend unnecessary money
- Only eat the amount and unenhance would need
- Train and Patrol more
- Keep your grades up (straight A’s)
- Don’t tell the Avengers about stupid problems
- Deal with problems by yourself, any way you need to.
The list was written on a piece of paper and tucked into a drawer, next to the paper, was some things to help him ‘deal with his problems.’ Namely, a blade from a pencil sharpener, it was a bad habit, he knew that, but his brain was telling him that he should cut himself instead of bothering the Avengers.