Work Text:
I remember. I remember the first time I did it. You were frantically trying to pin a buddha pin on your shirt. You were a mess. Something you weren't often was. I recognised the mess you were and without a word, I pinned it for you. You smiled your beautiful smile and thanked me. Even under all the stress and panic, you looked beautiful with a smile.
It must've been pretty shocking to you. A buff burly scary looking dude unexpectedly helping you pin a buddha pin on your shirt. You just went with it. I bought you coffee and you hurriedly left the shop.
I walked to work only to find my boss, Kong, asking me to show around a new captain that was stationed at the base. Little did I know it was you. You had considerably calmed down and the smile you gave me when you saw me again. I will cherish it forever. The smile was lazy but the way it made your eyes sparkle it just clicked.
We talked as I showed you around the place. You were quiet and serious but when you talked you filled the room up with your authority. I hung onto every word you spoke and you indulged me by speaking so much. Every single day after that you came to me. You always asked me to put the pin on you. You soon told me the reason for the pin. And I cried for you in my bed.
Every single day you asked me to pin it. And every single day we became closer. It was only a matter of time before we started dating. You technically initiated the whole thing first. It was when I learned that you knew how to pin it yourself but still you asked me because we were touching and talking and close to one another. I would've confronted you about it but I cherished the connection. And then you kissed me.
The kiss was passionate and full of desire and love and very sudden therefore it was very unexpected from someone like you. A person who thinks ahead and isn't impulsive and reckless like me. But I'm glad it happened. Then I asked you out. You accepted. I slowly started moving to your place and soon I’ve moved in full time. We spent over days languishing with each other during the few breaks we had from our strenuous life.
Then you got on one knee and proposed. I obviously said yes. The look of joy and pure happiness was wonderful. We were engaged. And still. You always asked me to pin the flower pin onto your chest. Through fights and arguments. Through lows and highs. It was something that stayed consistent. Never letting anything break from this routine in our life.
On our wedding day, I pinned the pin on you again and it was a beautiful complement to how much white you were wearing. You pinned something for me too and it was a beautiful Garp. A funny pun for my name. The way you giggled is forever engraved in my memory. Forever. Like how our love would always be forever.
Then we were caught in a surprise bombardment and were going to be lost but you prevented that. You prevented all of that. And so they took your life. They took your life and so they might’ve well have taken mine. You looked so small in my arms as you smiled at my crying face. Nothing ever seemed to faze you. Not even death.
I swore on your dying breath to avenge you but you just smiled sadly at me and told me to not do anything rash. How could you while fatally wounded still have the power to nag me! You died with a smile as I held you in my arms. My ugly tears staining your beautiful clothes. How can I live without you? How can I live without the routine we treasured? How could you die and leave me alone?
My hands shake as I move to pin the golden pin on your lapel. This will be the last time I pin the golden pin on you. Then I will never see your body again. You will be buried in the cold ground alone.
The golden pin forever on your lapel.
I love you so very much. With all my heart. I slowly hold your cold pale cheek. Tomorrow would've been our 3-year anniversary. Oh, I hope. To see your beautiful smile and your soothing voice again. I wish you were alive again! I wish. I wish. I wish.
Please come back! Please come back to me Sengoku! Please...
I can’t live without you.