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Being on the run does some weird things to your moral compass. Just a week ago, Will wouldn’t have dreamed of stealing from a 7/11. He wouldn’t even have thought about snatching a gallon of gasoline for the van that’s taking them across the country. He didn’t even know he was capable of sticking a Reese’s Pieces candy in his pocket without getting caught.
But he was, and he did. It wasn’t the worst thing he’s ever done, if you count leading several men to their deaths while being possessed. But hey, he was possessed. Not in his right mind. Hell, he didn’t even know if he was in his right mind ever since then.
But when Argyle slammed down several nips and some blunts onto the motel table, Will knew he would get truly fucked in the head.
“What’s all this?“ Mike said from where he sat on the other couch, a few feet away from where Will sat. Will tried his hardest to not be offended.
“What’s it look like, kiddo?” Argyle plopped down next to Mike with a grin. “We’re teaching you guys what a real trip looks like.”
Jonathan sat next to Will and bumped his shoulder. “Of course, you don’t have to. We just thought it’d take our minds off things.”
Right. Things. There were so many things that Will needed to forget, even if just for a moment. The most obvious one being the fact that they were running from the government, like a ragtag group of individuals grouping together to save the world. They were truly a motley crew.
But while that problem was out at the forefront, there was one that Will kept hidden down inside him. One that he has dealt with for more than half of his life.
He glanced at Mike, who was looking at the contents on the table with a slight frown. Freckles dotted his face, even more had shown up from being under the hot California sun. His hair was a little unkempt, but it framed his features like he belonged in a portrait. Will could draw him right now, and he studied him as Mike’s dark brown eyes lifted to meet his own green ones.
Every time they made eye contact, some sort of… electricity passed between them. The air turned heavy and then tension raised, like a rope being pulled taut between them. Neither knew how to balance on it, so one of them looked away each time. This time, it was Mike.
Yeah, Will thought, still looking at who he thought was his best friend. I need to forget about this.
“Sure. I’ll try it,” he said plainly. Mike’s eyes darted back to him with surprise, as well as Argyle and Jonathan’s.
“Ye-ah, that’s what I’m talking about little man!” Argyle whopped before popping open the wine bottle. Jonathan grabbed a few glasses from the small cabinet in the corner, and Will watched as Argyle filled his with a small amount.
The other three watched as Will took the glass and brought it to his lips. In a spurt of confidence, Will glanced at Mike one last time. Mike was so obviously gazing at his lips that Will almost choked, but he kept his composure and, with a grin, downed the glass in one gulp.
Okay so, remember what I said about Will keeping his composure? That shit hit the fan quickly. He felt so light and so heavy at the same time, so cold and so warm. He only heated up more when Mike had stolen Jonathan’s seat next to him, which was totally unexpected. Mike had been promptly avoiding him since he landed in the California airport, skipping past Will with a dismissive smile and going straight to El.
Will would say he was heartbroken. He would tell Mike how much it truly hurt him that he was being ignored. That they were falling apart. But that would imply too much. Too much.
Apparently it only took a couple nips for Mike to forget, but not for Will. Not for his racing mind. If anything, his sense of everything was just heightened. And by everything, I mean the obvious tension between him and his best friend(?). You can decide if that tension is greatly homoerotic or not, but Will would rather deny it has anything to do with that.
Will glanced at Mike with uncertainty, who didn’t seem to notice Will’s own uncomfort. Mike’s cheeks were rosy and puffed out, his lips were wet and red from the alcohol. Will couldn’t stop staring at them. They were moving. It took him a while to process that Mike was speaking.
“You two are such dumbasses,” he said to Jonathan and Argyle, who were sitting on the floor with weed. “I’m surprised you haven’t crashed the van yet.”
“Man, I almost did,” chortled Argyle. “Remember during the chase? I almost did.”
“Right, that stop sign!” Jonathan laughed. “No way we were stopping.”
“Hauling ass, we were. Were you two okay back there?” Argyle addressed Will and Mike.
“I fell onto Will, when you like, took that really sharp turn,” Mike said nonchalantly. “If he didn’t catch me, I would sue you for damaging my head.”
“Like that would matter during a chase!” Argyle protested, but Will wasn’t paying attention.
He was thinking back to that moment, when Mike fell on top of him, His hand had grabbed Will’s thigh. Will’s face burned. If anybody asked, he would just blame his blush on the nips.
“Where do you think they got this from anyway?” Mike asked. Will was surprised to find that he was only addressing him. “It’s not like we had time to stop and, like, deal some drugs.”
Will laughed, but it was more of a snort. It came so easily, almost like they hadn’t spent the last 3 days sharing awkward glances and the occasional smalltalk. “It was probably in the front of the van with those two.” He nodded towards Jonathan and Argyle, who were laying on the floor laughing like idiots. Will wondered what they were laughing about.
Mike scowled. “They probably did something to the nips. Otherwise I wouldn’t be feeling like this.”
“Alcohol does this to like, everybody, Mike.”
“Nah, no. Not that usual… drunkenness stuff,” Mike’s words were slurred as he leaned back against the couch. He looked up towards the ceiling with narrowed eyes. “It’s like I’m… like I’m…”
Will leaned back with him, propping his arm up onto the back pillow and resting his chin against the palm of his hand as he watched Mike struggle with his words. “Like you’re…?” He prompted.
Mike was silent before he turned to look at Will. His pupils were blown wide as he looked up at Will through his dark lashes. “Like I’m finally realizing something.”
Will got chills as the electricity returned. They stared and stared as Will’s mouth opened and closed again. Mike’s eyes darted to his mouth so quickly that Will would’ve missed it if he wasn’t already staring so intently at those eyes.
Whatever this had been going on for a while now. Ever since Will had been possessed. Tiny touches, secret glances, unspoken thoughts. Eyes studying each other’s faces from afar. Admiring each other’s features from afar. Never this close. Never this close to actually confronting it. Never this close to admitting the truth behind those glances and touches and thoughts.
“Realizing what?” Will whispered, blaming it on the drugs for his new spark of confidence. He felt like he was on cloud nine, not only from the weed, but from the fact that their noses were only inches apart.
Will’s hopes for some sort of confirmation plummeted when Mike suddenly hunched over. “That I’m about to throw up.”
“Oh, Jesus-” Will jumped from his seat, and grabbed Mike’s arm with enough force to pull his body forward. Mike hugged his stomach as Will dragged Mike to the motel room bathroom (when Will had first seen this bathroom he had almost retched himself) and pushed him towards the toilet. Mike dropped to his knees and vomited all the content from his stomach.
As Will rubbed his back soothingly, Jonathan appeared in the doorway. “Shit,” he said. His voice was rough and raspy. “I’m sorry guys, we should’ve paid attention to how much you had.”
Mike just weakly waved him off before going back to dry heaving.
“Take him back to your guys’ room,” Jonathan said. “We’ll let you sleep in for a while, but we have to get back on the road soon.”
Will just sent him a look. They didn’t need to hear about the fact that they were on the run right now. Will thought that they took drugs to forget that was even happening. But he just watched without complaint as Jonathan disappeared and went back to Argyle. Will continued to gently massage between Mike’s shoulder blades.
“I think I’m good,” Mike exhaled after a few minutes.
“You sure?” Will put a hand on his shoulder reassuringly. Mike stared at his hand. “Mike?”
“I need to sleep,” Mike groaned, stumbling to his feet.
“Woah, woah, buddy,” Will put his arm around Mike’s waist to steady him. “You just threw up, like, a gallon of puke. Take it easy.”
“How come you’re not affected?” Mike questioned with an accusatory glare, and… was that a pout? Cute.
Will chuckled. “I guess I can just handle it better than you.”
Mike protested that he was, in fact, better than everyone else and no one could surpass him. All Will could do was smile and agree as he led them to their own room. Once inside, Will helped Mike wash out his mouth before helping him into bed. Will himself had a growing headache, but he ignored it as he made sure Mike was comfortable. He tried to ignore Mike’s stare as he threw a blanket over him.
“You know what’s funny?” Mike said after a while.
“Hm?” replied Will.
“I never got to see that painting of yours.”
Will stopped. He met Mike’s eyes in shock. He remembered that?
“Oh, yeah. That…” Will bit his lip and sat on the bed across from Mike’s. “It was, well… I wanted to…” He trailed off and let his eyes wander to his fiddling hands. “You know what, forget it. It was nothing, really.”
“It looked like it was supposed to be a gift,” Mike turned on his side to fully face Will. His expression was unreadable. “What was it a painting of?”
Of you. Will stared into his eyes. Of us.
I could paint you right now. He could. He really could. Mike’s intense expression, his dark eyes boring into Will’s own. A strand of dark curly hair fell onto his cheek, the rest spread out onto the pillow. The light from the lamp highlighted his freckles, his lineaments, his lips. Oh, god, his lips.
You’re so beautiful.
Yet, instead of voicing his thoughts, instead of screaming, instead of grabbing Mike and kissing him, Will said this; “It really isn’t any of your business.”
Mike looked hurt. “What do you mean? It was a gift for me.”
“Yeah. And you completely ignored it,” Will scowled. “So you don’t get to know.”
Mike sat up completely, with his hair disheveled and a frown upon his face. “That’s not fair.”
Any thoughts of Mike’s beauty flew out of the window as anger piled inside of Will. “Oh, you want to talk about fair? Do you, really?”
Mike looked bewildered at Will’s anger. Will didn’t give him time to respond. “God, Mike, you are so stupid. You land in California, knowing just how excited I, your best friend, is to see you. And all you can offer is a smile? A wave? A tiny hello before passing right by me and straight to my sister? That hurt me so much, Mike!”
Stop. Stop talking. You can’t let him know.
Will didn’t stop.
“And at the roller rink, on my birthday, you couldn’t even spare me a glance. You didn’t care to think that, oh, it’s Will’s birthday, maybe I should have a proper conversation with him or even, y’know, say happy birthday.”
You’re only hurting yourself and him. Look at him. He’s hurting just as much as you.
And Mike did truly look guilty, but Will wasn’t having it. He could blame it on the drugs all he wanted, in the end.
“But no. Never. Because It’s just me, Will. And nobody seems to care anymore.” He tried his hardest to stop the tears. “Not even you.”
That seemed to snap Mike out of his silence. “Will, of course I care-”
“Then prove it.”
Mike blinked. “What?”
“You sure haven’t seemed to care since last summer.” Will’s eyes narrowed at Mike’s flinch. “Prove it.”
Mike was still. His eyebrows were raised and his mouth hung open a little. Will almost laughed.
“See, you can’t! You can’t and I was stupid to ever believe you would-” Will was so caught up in his ranting that he didn’t notice Mike had gotten up. He stopped talking as soon as Mike’s hands cupped both of his cheeks. Will’s words stuttered as he stared up at Mike, whose face was only mere inches away from his.
“Will. Listen to me,” Mike said. Softly. The voice he only ever used with Will. “I care about you. So much. Nothing could ever change that.”
The line was taut. The electricity was there. For the first time, they balanced together. Will looked into Mike’s eyes, saw the sincerity, and knew that he meant it.
“Then why…” Will whispered, all anger gone. Just confusion. Just hope, the kind of hope he didn’t allow himself to have. “...why did you act like I didn’t exist?”
Mike exhaled shakily. Will could smell the mint mouthwash he had used. “I wasn’t trying to ignore you. I was trying to ignore…” Mike bit his lip. Will’s eyes darted to them and back up again. Mike found his words. “I was trying to ignore my feelings.”
Something was sparking inside of Will. “Your… feelings?”
“Will.”
Will’s eyes widened. “Oh.”
Oh.
Oh.
“You mean…?”
“Yes, Will.” Mike smiled, though Will could tell he was scared.
The spark inside of Will exploded. In an instant, his mouth connected with Mike’s. Mike wasted no time in reciprocating. Will slung his arms around Mike’s neck to pull him impossibly closer. Mike leaned into it, one hand sliding up Will’s head to grip his hair.
Mike, Mike, Mike, was all that Will could think. He couldn’t even think. It felt so good, all of it felt so good. Mike’s lips moved against his, almost desperately, almost like he had been waiting for this as long as Will had. He could feel Mike’s other hand trail down his neck to place against his chest. He felt himself falling as Mike followed him, and instantly they connected their lips again. They were so soft. Will couldn’t think. Mike’s hands were so soft. Will couldn’t think. Mike’s mouth on his neck felt amazing. Will couldn’t think.
Yeah. He was blaming this on the drugs.