Work Text:
The endless journey. The sound of emptiness. The train with a sole passenger: a child in white coat.
The Most Ancient Dream, they said. He was a dreamer: the lone dreamer of the worlds, the lone dreamer who keeps the continuity of the worlds.
This child was Kim Dokja: the Demon King of Salvation, the successor of the Underworld, and the sole reader of the story he loved the most in the world.
After enduring the journey of eternity, Kim Dokja’s stories were beginning to disintegrate. Those countless stories which made him “Kim Dokja” were starting to scatter throughout the vast universe.
Kim Dokja could still hear the Fourth Wall’s voice. He thought he could not do this anymore.
He’s losing his consciousness. Everything went pitch black. Everything went silent: no Fourth Wall’s voice, no sound of the train. He lost his senses. It was as if he stepped into nothingness.
Kim Dokja felt like he had been in this “nothingness” for quite a long time until he heard a very faint voice. Kim Dokja tried to focus his senses towards this voice. The voice grew louder and louder. It was the voice of a woman. A hint of worry could be heard from her voice.
After trying to listen to the voice more and more, Kim Dokja realized it was not the only voice in that place. He was beginning to hear more noises: the sound of a crowd, the sound of footsteps, and the sound of a subway train.
Kim Dokja thought he could regain his senses. He could feel that he was sitting in the middle of people. Kim Dokja was not alone.
The voice he heard before is now repeatedly calling his name.
“Dokja-ssi.”
Kim Dokja remembered this voice. It was his co-worker, Yoo Sangah’s, who rode the train with him because her bike was stolen, just before all the scenarios bega
A speck of light appeared before him. It grew brighter and brighter until it lit up his whole vision. Slowly, the view of the crowded subway train came into his sight. A little boy holding a box of insects was sitting right on the opposite side of Kim Dokja’s seat. A white-haired boy in his high-school uniform was standing near an old lady who was sitting not far from where Kim Dokja was sitting. A big muscular young man was standing near the subway door. A man in black formal attire was sitting near him. And lastly, a gentle-looking woman was sitting by Kim Dokja’s side.
“Dokja-ssi. Finally you’re awake.”
Kim Dokja turned his head towards the voice. There, he could see Yoo Sangah in her usual formal attire.
“You must’ve been tired,” Yoo Sangah said with a relieved expression on her face. “Sorry I disturbed your nap. I don’t know which station you’re getting off at, so I woke you up.”
What had just happened? What was Yoo Sangah doing here? Didn’t Kim Dokja stay inside the train and let his companions go and enjoy their new life with his other 49% self? He was the Most Ancient Dream, right? And he was inside the train alone? What were all these people doing here?
“Sangah-ssi,” Kim Dokja called her.
“Yes?”
“What are you doing here? Where are the others?”
Yoo Sangah stared at Kim Dokja as if he was mad. She didn’t have the slightest idea about what her co-worker was saying.
“We got off work and bumped into each other here, remember? Someone stole my bike so I had to take the subway,” Yoo Sangah paused, looking at him with worry, “Dokja-ssi, are you okay? You look so pale.”
Kim Dokja felt uneasy, as if there’s a hole of emptiness in his heart. What was that feeling? Kim Dokja didn’t know.
Awkward. Kim Dokja took his phone and checked the time.
07:15 PM.
It was past seven. The first scenario was supposed to start fifteen minutes ago. Kim Dokja looked around and saw no dokkaebi inside the train. Everything looked perfectly normal. All these people were doing their own business, safe and sound. There were no such furry little creatures who called themselves dokkaebi, there were no weird scenarios, and there were no constellations who were watching them. Everything was perfectly normal.
Had he been dozing off all this time? Kim Dokja couldn’t remember when exactly he had fallen asleep.
As if a speck of light lit up in Kim Dokja’s mind, Kim Dokja decided to tell Yoo Sangah what’s on his mind. Kim Dokja told her from the very beginning: from when the dokkaebi named Bihyung appeared in this train, the scenarios, the constellations, the people they met on their way and the moments they spent together with their other companions, until he reached the last part. Kim Dokja didn’t think he could say it, as if the words caught up in his throat, Kim Dokja swallowed back those words.
Of course, Yoo Sangah might think that Kim Dokja was being delusional.
“Don’t worry, Dokja-ssi. I think it’s only a dream. We are safe now,” Yoo Sangah said with her comforting smile.
Yes, it was only a dream, such a wild dream in such a short nap.
Right. In reality, Kim Dokja had never met the people who he considered his companions. Kim Dokja had never met those fictional characters from his favorite web novel. Kim Dokja had never died several times. Kim Dokja had never become a constellation. Kim Dokja had never become the Most Ancient Dream.
After all, those bittersweet adventures were just in Kim Dokja’s mind. He had no one that he could call “companions” in his real life. He had no one that longing for him. He had no one worth dying for. He was alone in his own journey of life. He’s just an ordinary office worker who goes by the name “Kim Dokja”.
But his little heart felt a little bit relieved because he thought that he didn’t lie to real people. They were only his imaginary companions.
What a wild dream.
He must have been imagining things because he dozed off just after he read the last chapter of his favorite web novel.
Speaking of which, Kim Dokja still had approximately half an hour before he got off the train, so he opened the application he used to read web novels. Kim Dokja stared at his favorite web novel.
Three Ways to Survive in a Ruined World, by tls123.
It was a story that accompanied Kim Dokja since he was a teenager. It was the story he loved the most. It was the story of a regressor who repeated his life over and over to reach the end. Kim Dokja grew up with this story and apparently, this story had reached its epilogue just a few moments ago.
Kim Dokja felt like he couldn’t move on from this story. Plus, he had a dream of getting into this novel. His heart felt empty. What should he do?
As if answering Kim Dokja’s uneasiness, a little voice in his heart suggested, “Why don’t you read this story again? After all, you love this story, right?”
Right. Kim Dokja loved this story.
By that remark, Kim Dokja started to read his favorite story again from the very beginning. It was like Kim Dokja was introduced to the protagonist once more. He felt a different sensation when he read it again. His mother once said that if he read a story over and over, he would see a different point of view of the story. Kim Dokja thought he was experiencing it right now.
Kim Dokja kept reading. Chapters by chapters went throughout his mind. Unexpectedly, Kim Dokja had reached the epilogue once more. He had actually finished the whole 3,149 chapters.
[There are three ways to survive in a ruined world. Now, I have forgotten a few, but one thing is certain. The fact that you who are reading this now will survive.
-Three ways to survive in a ruined world]
Just after Kim Dokja read the last word, the train stopped. It was the station where Kim Dokja had to get off. Kim Dokja rose up from his seat. He felt his sore body after sitting for a while.
The train doors were opening, revealing the view of the familiar station. Kim Dokja approached the door patiently since it was pretty crowded. He finally reached the door after waiting for the passengers in front of him to get off. As Kim Dokja was about to step outside the train, the train door closed swiftly and disappeared, along with all the passengers in the train.
Within that rapid change, Kim Dokja immediately remembered his co-worker. He turned around towards the seat that he and Yoo Sangah sat before. But unfortunately, all Kim Dokja found was empty seats. There was no Yoo Sangah.
Silence filled in the air. The familiar view came to his sight. It was the view of the empty train Kim Dokja knew the most: the train where the Most Ancient Dream dwelled for eternity.
Kim Dokja was alone again.
⸢K im Do kj a wa s al one aga i n.⸥
Kim Dokja was alone again.
Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone.
That momentarily “life” he experienced, the only moment he could only feel after so long, had been imaginary after all. The adventure that he thought was a dream, was not a dream. It was the reality dressed in a nightmare that he had to face: the reality that he was now the Most Ancient Dream.
“I am alone.”
Those words slipped out of Kim Dokja’s tongue.
Even though the word “alone” had always been Kim Dokja’s companion, it still pained him. Nobody wants to be left alone. Nobody wants to be hurt.
What kind of great sins had Kim Dokja ever committed in his past life so that the whole universe was mocking him? Kim Dokja had always thought that he never deserved happiness, even for a while.
Kim Dokja felt his heart beat faster. The silence was now filled with the sound of his uncontrollable heartbeat. His chest felt heavy. It was as if the train had turned into a vacuum space. It was hard to breathe. Tears welling up. His visions turned blurry.
Kim Dokja found himself in his most unwanted situation.
He wanted to scream. He wanted to escape. He wanted to erase all of his pain and the emptiness in his soul. He wanted someone to be there with him.
The Fourth Wall stared at Kim Dokja in silence. It was Kim Dokja in his most vulnerable state.
⸢W hy do n’t y ou r e ad it ag a i n?⸥
Kim Dokja paused.
⸢Af t er a ll, it wa s the st o ry you love th e m os t, ri g ht?⸥
It was the story Kim Dokja loved the most, the source of his comfort, his coping mechanism. Right. Kim Dokja always read this story every time he broke down. When terrible things happened to him, it was as if this story had always been able to cure him, to make his pain go away.
“Yes, you’re right. I can just read this again and everything will be fine.”
Kim Dokja began to read the story of his protagonist again. As Kim Dokja read, the tears in his face were drying. His heartbeat was becoming steady and slow. His mind went easy as he enjoyed the protagonist’s adventure once more.
The words absorbed Kim Dokja and Kim Dokja was drowning in his own world.
After some time, Kim Dokja reached the 999th chapter. It was when Yoo Joonghyuk was facing the “Spear that Parts the Boundaries of the Sea”, Poseidon, and it was the time that Yoo Joonghyuk was supposed to defeat Poseidon for the seventh time.
“Woah. Yoo Joonghyuk was using this plan again like he did in his 21st round. I remember that he was …”
Kim Dokja paused for a moment.
“What was he actually doing in the 21st round?”
As if his memories had been wiped away, Kim Dokja couldn’t seem to remember the small details he used to remember.
Why couldn’t Kim Dokja remember what he had just read a few moments ago?
Kim Dokja didn’t need to know why. He just needed to read it all over again because he loved reading this story so much. Therefore, Kim Dokja kept reading.
But in the end, the more he read, the more foreign he was with its contents. Why did he like this protagonist so much? Why does this story never reach the end? This story feels like it was written just for one special reader. But … why? Kim Dokja couldn’t remember a single thing.
And yet, Kim Dokja still read it again, over and over. And eventually, this one story he loved so much, is now just another story that he feels the need to read. The protagonist he looked up to so much, is now just another main character who fights with all of his life to reach his happy ending.
Kim Dokja is a human who loves to read this story. However, he is no longer “Kim Dokja” only: he is the lone reader and the lone dreamer.
The most omniscient being in the Star Stream and yet also the most powerless. Constellation, the Most Ancient Dream, was fated to always be there to keep dreaming. Until the end of time.
[Constellation ‘The Most Ancient Dream’s’ ■■ is ‘Eternity’.]
The End