Archive of Our Own

They're lying on the couch in Cas' living room, a tray of nachos on the table between them, and a couple of half-empty beer cans, just watching a movie like any other Friday night, when Dean suddenly shifts to look at him, and Cas lifts his eyes just above his knees to see him.

"When did you- how did you know you were gay?"

"Um?" Cas starts, the cogs in his mind turning to try and figure out what he missed in this conversation. He didn't think he'd been gapping out that badly, he'd just been admiring the way the light from the TV flickered over Dean's cheekbones- and yeah, fuck, he hasn't been paying any attention at all.

"Like, when did you realize? Was it a big thing, or did it just happen over time?"

"I- uh- I guess I just realized the same way you realized you like girls? It never seemed any different to me, I just didn't like girls," he shrugs, and leans forward grabbing his beer and taking a long drink. Out of the corner of his eye, he catches Dean's fingers, tapping anxiously and sliding up his own can.

"When did you come out?"

"What?"

"I mean, you were already open about it when we met, how did you tell everyone?"

"I only really told my sisters and Meg," he shrugs, "they just kind of accepted it and went on with their lives. It wasn't a big deal for me."

"Did you ever feel like people thought you might be faking it?"

"No, Dean," he frowns, "what is this about?"

Dean rearranges himself, pulling his legs up under himself so he's facing Cas, and he throws an arm over the back of the couch, picking at the fabric awkwardly, "lately, I-" he falters, looking down at his lap, "I'm not totally sure that I'm as straight as I um, thought."

Cas' mind shuts down at that point, and he's pretty sure he spends a good ten minutes just gaping at Dean, and as much as he knows it's rude, and Dean must be panicking over there, he can't seem to stop himself. Dean has always, as long as Cas has known him, been the one who's bragging about what girls he's slept with, and the one who always finds himself surrounded by them, and it's difficult to reconcile that man with the one who's sitting in front of him now, stuttering about not being totally straight.

"Cas?"

"I'm sorry," Cas fumbles, "I just- when did you realize?"

"I dunno, I mean I've always found men attractive I just didn't think it was anything different than anyone else, but now I kind of want to try..."

"Dean," Cas starts, sitting forward, "if you want to, I can help." Dean gives him an odd look, and Cas chuckles lightly, "there's a bar downtown, it's called Candy, I'll take you down there."

"Tonight?" Dean asks, sounding hopeful.

"If you want."

It's obvious Dean's conflicted, but Cas knows he wants to say yes, though he just stares down at his lap and picks at his nails anxiously.

"Tonight," Dean gives him a hopeful half-smile and Cas' stomach flips.

Half an hour later finds them strolling casually into Candy, or rather, Cas strolls casually in and Dean tags along behind him, looking from side to side and keeping much closer to Cas than is strictly necessary. He slides onto a bar stool and Dean slips in next to him, leaning on the bar and looking around. The bartender walks up, leaning over the bar next to Cas and gives him a wide smile.

"Evenin' brother. What can I get for you."

"Margarita and a shot of whiskey."

“Comin’ right up.”

"Thanks Benny." Cas glances over to Dean and his friend gives him a quick, thankful grin before turning back to the crowd behind them.

"Friend of yours?"

"Yeah," he smiles, "he's relatively new to," he gestures around them, "this." Benny nods knowingly and disappears to the back of the bar, returning a couple minutes later with their drinks, and Dean seems relieved to have something to do with himself.

They sit and have a few drinks, chatting with the bartender, until Dean's buzzed enough that his nervous aura has dissipate, and Cas trusts him not to panic if someone comes up to talk to him. It takes a bit of effort, but Cas manages to get him up and out on the dancefloor, tugging him close.

"Don't be nervous," he says, just loud enough for Dean to hear him over the crowd, "don't let anyone take it further than you want, not that you'll have a problem with that," he smiles encouragingly and Dean just looks at him. "Men are no different than women, Dean. If you don't want to do more than dance, all you have to do is say, and if someone doesn't want to let you go, tell them I'm your boyfriend or something."

"Yeah," Dean mumbles, but when he looks up at Cas, he flashes a confident smile.

"Have fun," Cas grins, "and remember, I'm right over here if you want to get out." He claps Dean on the shoulder and makes his way back to the bar, weaving between people to get back to his seat. Benny shoots him a look as he sits back down, but continues with his customer. When he finishes, he leans back on the bar next to Cas.

"So, you're not with him, then?"

"No," Cas replies casually, taking a sip of his drink, "he's my best friend."

"Huh."

"What?" Cas frowns, turning to face the bartender.

"Just haven't seen you go home with anyone in a long time, and that boy there is something else."

"He's just a friend, Benny."

"You tellin' me nothin's ever happened?"

"Never."

"But not because you don’t want it, right?"

"He's not even sure of his own sexuality, right now. That's why we're here."

"So you're tellin' me you have no feelings whatsoever besides friendship for the sex god you came in here with?"

Cas looks down at his drink, and he's about to respond when Dean comes up behind him, shifting his stool closer to Cas' and dropping his head on the counter. Cas glances up at Benny and he pours Dean another shot before backing off.

"What's wrong?"

"I can't do this," Dean mumbles, "everyone is so... experienced, and they all know what they're doing. I just feel like an idiot."

"You're not Dean," Cas claps him on the shoulder, "but if you want to go home, we can just watch movies or something?"

"Could we?"

"Of course. Why don't you go start the car up and I'll settle up." Dean nods and quickly vanishes into the crowd again. Benny pops up a few minutes later, and Cas settles their tab with a final 'suggestion' from Benny that maybe Dean doesn't want some random one night stand, and that maybe Cas should share whatever feelings he has with him. Cas just gives him a look and bids him goodnight before following Dean out the door.

Dean's still feeling a little down when they get back, so Cas puts on a movie and throws an arm around Dean's shoulder, pulling him into his side. They sit there in silence for a long time, Dean frowning against Cas' shoulder, and finally Cas can't stand it anymore. He hates seeing Dean upset, and he doesn't want one bad experience to make him shy away from men if that's what he's actually into.

"Dean," he starts, breaking the silence, "I could... help, if you want." A faint pink blush crosses Dean's cheeks and the tips of his ears go red, and Cas can't help thinking that maybe he wants this as much as he does. "Would you like that?" Dean pauses for a few moments before he nods lightly, glancing in Cas' direction, and Cas draws his arm back, letting his fingers brush Dean's neck as he does.

"Come here," he says, shuffling so he has one foot on the floor, the other tucked under him. Dean moves to face him and Cas rests a hand on his knee, "I want to help."

"Okay," Dean breathes, and Cas smiles encouragingly.

"Kiss me," he says, and Dean pauses, looking down at him lap. "Unless you'd rather I kiss you?"

"Uh-" Dean stammers, his cheeks darkening as he avoids Cas' gaze, "could you-?"

Cas doesn't say anything in response, but he smiles to himself as he tips Dean's chin up, and leans in slowly, his nose brushing against Dean's. It feels like an eternity that they linger there, even if it's barely two seconds, and it's Dean who moves to press their lips together first. It's soft and fleeting, but as they part Dean presses forward again. Cas parts his lips and deepens the kiss, acutely aware of the little shiver that goes through Dean as he does so. When he pulls back, Dean looks a little shocked.

"Was that okay?"

"Yeah," Dean breathes, "um, a little scratchy but not bad," he shrugs and Cas laughs, "maybe even good," Dean admits, "could we-?"

Cas leans in to hide the grin that crosses his face, and kisses him again. He starts slowly, not pulling away so quickly this time, and when he parts his lips Dean leans into it. Dean's hands hover in mid-air, like he's not sure what to do with them, or if he's allowed to touch, and Cas takes his hands gently, setting one on his hip and the other on his thigh. He shifts forward and Dean's hands slide over his clothes, his fingers just barely pressing in.

Cas pulls back and kisses his chin, "is this okay?"

"Yeah," Dean nods, his eyes still shut as he moves into him a little. Cas kisses along his jaw, just grazing the skin with his teeth as he moves down slowly, pressing his lips against the bolt of his jaw and sliding down to press open-mouthed kisses down the line of his neck.

Dean shudders and tips his head down so their lips meet again, and Cas smiles against him, slipping his hand up Dean's thigh. Cas pushes ahead, slipping his tongue out and tracing the line of Dean's lips. Dean sighs into him and his hand comes around, sliding around his side and slipping up Cas' stomach.

"How does it feel?"

"A little weird... good weird, though."

"Should I stop?"

"No." He curls his hand in Cas' shirt, and Cas barely touches his lips before Dean deepens the kiss, pushing his tongue between Cas' lips and pulling him in closer. Cas barely holds back a moan at his sudden eagerness, and meets him in the middle, sucking his tongue into his mouth. It's easy to forget with Dean's responses, that he's not used to this; this isn't some guy he picked up at the bar, this is his best friend who has only just admitted that he's kinda sorta into guys too.

He pulls away and kisses down his neck again, pressing his lips down into the vee of Dean's shirt, his tongue slipping out unintentionally as he moves back up, and Dean moans softly as Cas' hand slides up over his hip, one sliding under the fabric of his short to rub his hipbone. Dean pulls back a little, and Cas immediately withdraws, sitting back and watching Dean's expression.

"Sorry," he breathes, a little out of breath, "is everything okay?"

"I'm just-" Dean shifts uncomfortably, I'm just kinda-" he shrugs, dropping his hands into his lap.

"Turned on?" Cas asks bluntly, and Dean's eyes snap up to his and he breathes out a breathy 'yeah'.

"We should stop."

"Do you want to?"

"Not really," Dean admits, sliding a little closer. He slips his hands over Cas' knees and Cas glances down at his lip, at the bulge in the front of his jeans, and presses his nose against Dean's cheek.

"I can help you with that," he breathes, "if you want."

Dean breathes out shakily and pushes his hips forward, "please."

Cas slides a hand down his chest and Dean straightens up, pressing into the touch. He lets Cas touch him, follows his lead. Cas has to hold himself back, because Dean's submission to him is turning him on more than anything. He reaches down and pulls Dean's shirt up over his head, delighting in the little gasp and look of utter lust in his eyes when he meets Cas' gaze. Cas leans back into him, kissing him quickly before dragging his fingers down Dean's chest to the button on his jeans.

"Can I?" he asks, and Dean's shy again all of a sudden. Cas kisses behind his ear, "I won't do anything you don't want me to."

"Touch me."

Cas leans in, catching his lips in a soft kiss as he presses his palm against the front of his jeans. Dean whimpers and presses his hips up, which only encourages Cas to press harder, rubbing his hard cock through his jeans. He fits his hand around him through the rough fabric and Dean arches forward, his eyes falling shut with a shaky moan. Cas nips at his lip and Dean pushes forward hard, kissing him desperately as his hips roll up, and it's so fucking hot.

He brings one hand up to Dean's stomach, rolling a nipple between his thumb and forefinger, and Dean chokes back a moan, his hips shoving up into Cas' palm. Cas' own cock pushes against his jeans, and he doesn't know where this is going to go, but his body is impatient.

Pulling Dean's legs up on either side of him, Cas turns so he's on his knees, Dean's shins on either side of his hips, and he pops his jeans open, pulling the zipper down with his eyes locked on Dean's to judge his reaction. There's nothing but desire, and when Cas' fingers curl around the waistband, Dean lifts his hips so Cas can shimmy his pants down. It's a little awkward getting them off, and Dean chuckles, pulling one knee up to his chest to give Cas the space to pull them over his feet. He rests his ankle back on Cas' shoulder and smiles up at him.

Dean is beautiful when he smiles, and combined with the flush on his chest and the growing wet spot on his boxer-briefs, he's so fucking sexy Cas can barely stand it. He throws his emotion into kissing Dean's chest and up his neck, his hand still stroking up the length of Dean's cock. He can feel him harden under his hand, and it sends sparks of pleasure shooting to his groin, a heavy breath escaping his lips before he can hold it back. Stretching up, he rests his elbows above Dean's shoulders, keeping his crotch above him, and mouths down his neck and along his shoulder before moving down to suck his nipple, pressing lightly with his teeth and winding his tongue around it until Dean's hips jump up, bumping against his own.

"Fuck," Dean breathes, his hands groping for purchase as he writhes beneath him. Cas moves down, nipping at the skin below Dean's naval, and kisses down to the waistband of his underwear before Dean stops him.

"Wait, Cas- I don't- I want-"

"Do you want me to stop?"

"God, no," Dean huffs, "I want to touch you."

"Are you sure?"

"Very."

Cas smiles as he leans over him, and Dean's hands find his cheeks, pulling him down and kissing him passionately, his hands carding through Cas' hair as he licks into his mouth, one knee pulling up to box him in. He's incredibly responsive as Cas moans into him, pressing his chest up and rolling his hips against Cas' as Cas moves back down to his hips again, mouthing at the head of his cock through his boxers. Dean's already wet, his pre-come leaving a salty taste on Cas' tongue as he works over the fabric.

He tugs Dean's boxers down, closing his mouth around the head and sucking hard. Dean groans and pushes his hips up, and Cas sinks down on him as Dean grabs his hair. The slight pull turns him on even more, and Cas hollows his cheeks, sliding up Dean's cock and pressing his tongue into the slit. He lies himself down, pushing his arms under Dean's thighs and wrapping around him, pressing his own hips down into the couch. The friction is amazing, and he moans around Dean's cock, dragging his teeth along the skin as he pulls up and off.

"Don't stop," Dean whimpers, "Cas I'm so close. Please-"

Cas groans at the desperation in his voice, slipping his lips over Dean's head again and sucking him down until Dean's cock bumps the back of his throat. He swallows around him and Dean's fingers tighten in his hair, the sounds dropping from his lips shaky and frantic. Cas bobs quickly, keeping his lips tight around Dean's shaft, and humming around him. He keeps his eyes up, watching Dean as he's half folded over. He wants to see the moment Dean falls apart, watch his face as he loses control. Dean rocks his hips up, his movements sharp and unsteady, and Cas lets him fuck his mouth, curling his fingers around the base of his cock and jerking him in time with his thrusts.

"Cas," Dean moans, "Cas I'm gonna come," his words jumble together and he groans as Cas pushes his hips into the couch and swallows him down all the way. Dean just whimpers, one hand curled in Cas' hair and the other groping blindly at his shoulder his hips jump under Cas' palm. He comes with a loud moan, cursing and mumbling Cas' name, and Cas swallows it all, his eyes still focused on Dean as he collapses back against the couch.

Cas pulls off and laps at his spent cock, smiling to himself at the desperate little groans that Dean keeps uttering. He pulls away when Dean lifts his head, and climbs up over him trailing kisses up the center of his chest. He kisses Dean's lips , huffing a soft laugh as the other man barely moves to respond, just opens up to Cas and lets him slide their tongue together and suck his bottom lip into his mouth. When he draws away, Dean lets out a heavy breath.

"Fuck, that was amazing."

Cas presses his nose against Dean's ear, nipping at his earlobe, "roll over, Dean."

Dean groans but obliges him, turning over carefully and sitting on his knees. Cas runs a hand down his spine, following it with wet kisses, and stops just above his ass, sliding his thumb between Dean's cheeks and biting his lips at the beautiful sounds that end up muffled in the arm of the couch. He spreads Dean’s cheeks apart, breathing heavily against his hole and nipping at his ass.

"Do you want me to?" he asks, and Dean moans into the couch.

"God, please," he breathes.

Cas doesn't waste any time, licking over Dean's hole and Dean gasps at the touch. There's something entirely arousing, knowing that no other man has ever touched Dean like this, that he's the first, and as if he's not turned on enough already, Dean rolls his hips back onto his tongue, any question of whether he's enjoying himself is completely shattered. Cas points his tongue and teases the puckered muscle, circling around it and pressing in, but Dean's too tight to go very far. He pulls away, much to Dean's apparent displeasure, and sucks a finger into his mouth, slicking it up with his own spit before pressing it against Dean's hole and pushing through.

The broken 'oh, fuck' he gets in response is enough incentive for him to continue and he pushes in further, crooking his finger when Dean groans into the couch. This brings on a whole new wave of desperate sounds, and Cas runs his free hand soothingly up the back of Dean's thigh. He pulls out and presses a kiss to the swell of Dean's ass, even as the man pushes back up against him.

"Don't stop," Dean whimpers.

"Are you gonna come again?" Cas asks breathlessly.

Dean shakes his head, "no, just feels so good."

Cas leans up, kissing his shoulder and smiling, "just give me two minutes, I have something that'll make it feel even better." Dean twists to kiss him again before letting him go, and for a second this feels like something they can keep doing. He doesn't let him get distracted by the thought though, making directly for his bedroom, and returning quickly, a bottle of lube in hand.

"What's that?" Dean asks, lifting his eyes as Cas comes around the side of the couch.

"You'll see," Cas grins, pulling off his own shirt and settling himself back in place between Dean's thighs. Dean's eyes track the motion, settling on Cas’ chest, and taking him in like it's something he's wanted for ages and has only just found out he's allowed to have.

Despite the way it makes his cock throb, it actually makes Cas a little anxious, and he makes quick work of lubing up two fingers and pressing them carefully into Dean. Everything else is forgotten with a shuddering breath, and Dean pushes his ass up, driving Cas' fingers deeper into him. He groans as Cas starts to move, rubbing his walls and searching for the bundle of nerves that he knows will make Dean lose his mind. When he finds it, Dean cries out, burying his face in the couch, and it's the most ridiculously arousing thing Cas has ever heard, so honest and desperate, and he's the one making Dean sound like that. He fucks into him with increasing speed, making sure not to push him over the edge again just yet, and when Dean's loose enough, he pulls away, slipping his tongue in where he's open and waiting.

"Oh God, baby," Dean moans, and Cas knows the name is probably instinctive, but it doesn't stop him from wanting to hear it again and again. He twists and curls his tongue and suddenly there's a hand on Dean's ass, holding himself open to give Cas better access, and one in his hair, curling around the dark strands. Cas hums against him, closing his lips around Dean's hole and sucking as he tongue fucks him, and the response he gets is overwhelming. The hand that's in Cas' hair pulls away, finding his hand, and pulling him up, wrapping his fingers around Dean's hardening cock, and he whimpers, moving to hold himself open with both hands as he thrusts lightly into Cas' fist.

Lifting his free hand, Cas presses one finger in next to his tongue, fucking Dean more slowly and pressing his own hips into the couch to dull the insistent ache in his cock. He pulls his mouth away, kissing down the back of Dean's balls and sucking at the thin skin.

"You're so beautiful," he murmurs, dragging his lips and tongue over his balls and pulling his cock back to lick the trail pf pre-come from the tip, "do you want to come again?" He pushes a second finger in slowly and Dean sighs deeply.

"Not yet," he pants. He moves to roll over, and Cas pulls away, sitting back on his heels and resting his hand on denim-clad knees.

"What's wrong?" he asks, meeting Dean's eyes as the man mirrors his position.

"Nothing," Dean breathes, biting his lips and taking in Cas' flushed chest and the thick bulge in his jeans, "lie back." Cas slides down the couch, sliding his legs on either side of Dean and planting one foot on the ground. He doesn't know what to expect, but when Dean presses a hand to his chest, trailing his fingers down to the top of Cas' jeans, he arches up to follow the touch and remembers Dean saying he wanted to touch him, too.

He thrusts up as Dean's palm covers his clothed erection, and the moan he lets out seems to give Dean courage, because he presses harder, rubbing Cas through the rough fabric. Cas' legs fall open as he continues, biting down on his lip to stop himself from crying out with the pleasure of finally, finally, finding some release of all that pressure.

"Don't," Dean says quietly, the color in his cheeks flaring as he presses his thumb to Cas' bottom lip, pulling it free, "I like to hear you." And goddamn, those words go straight to his cock and he can feel a spurt of pre-come slide down his length, and he needs Dean to touch him, needs some kind of relief or he's gonna come in his jeans like it's his first time.

Thankfully, Dean doesn't tease. He pulls Cas' jeans open quickly, and there's a brief repeat of earlier where they both have to shuffle to get them past his feet, but then hot fingers curl around him, and Cas is lost. He drops his head back over the end of the couch and pushes up slowly into Dean's grasp, gasping and muttering as experienced fingers seek out every sensitive spot. This, at least, Dean knows, and he's not nearly as unsure of himself as Cas would have expected, less than he himself was the first time he touched a dick that wasn't his own.

He focuses on the head, rubbing his thumb against the underside until Cas' whole cock is slick with pre-come, Dean's fingers slipping easily over the silky flesh. Cas’ eyelids flutter as Dean squeezes a little harder, and strokes up his entire length, Cas' hips rising with him, but then his hand pulls away entirely, pressing against his hip, and Cas raises his head to find Dean watching his face. His cheeks are red and his eyes are dark, and Cas can't resist grabbing his face and drawing him into a heated kiss, their tongues twining together.

Dean reaches back between them, curling his hand around Cas' cock, and he breaks the kiss, leaning against his forehead, "I want you to come," he breathes, "want you to fuck me."

Cas cock jumps at the mere suggestion of it, and Dean's hips fall to rut against him. It feels fucking amazing, but he doesn't want to rush Dean into anything he's not ready for, anythign they're not ready for.

"Are you sure?" he asks, "there's other things I can do-"

"I'm sure," Dean interrupts, "I want you." Dean's whole body seems more flushed than it was a second ago, and Cas can hardly resist when he's ready and willing above him, regardless of what this might mean for their friendship. They've been through worse together, and Dean is flat out asking him for this.

"Fuck," Cas breathes, sliding one hand up Dean's thigh as the other slides up the length of his cock. He pulls Dean up over him as he sits up, and gently presses him back against the couch, lifting his legs so they're propped up by Cas' arms. Dean's eyes stay on his face, watching every flicker of desire that crosses it as Cas rocks down against him, sliding their cocks together.

He draws back, pressing against Dean's rim, and suddenly Dean falls silent, all the soft whimpers and groans ceasing at once as Cas presses forward, the head of his cock slipping into him.

"You okay?" Cas asks, and Dean nods, putting his hands on Cas' face and drawing him into a deep kiss for good measure. Cas pushes himself deeper, the hand that's not propping him up sliding soothingly up Dean's thigh. Dean breaks their kiss momentarily, trailing his fingers down Cas' jaw.

"I'm glad I'm with you," he breathes, and Cas dips down, catching his lips as he rolls his hips, pulling out and thrusting back in slowly. Dean gasps as he bumps his prostate, throwing his arms around Cas' neck and digging his fingers in.

"Relax," Cas breathes, kissing his jaw and down his neck, "I've got you." He bottoms out with one final thrust, and wraps his legs as tightly around him as he can manage.

"Fuck me," he breathes, "I wanna feel you, Cas." He whines as Cas rocks into him, throwing his head back, and Cas takes advantage of the position so mouth at his neck, pulling soft noises from Dean's lips, and when he moves up to his jaw, Dean grabs his jaw and kisses him frantically. It's endearing really, that Dean's so eager to kiss him, their lips barely separating for a second, and Cas grins against him, nipping at his lips and brushing his cheek with his thumb.

He holds Dean close, moving in long slow strokes and touching any part of him that he can reach without pulling away from him. Their bodies are pressed firmly together and Cas can feel the press of Dean's cock against his abdomen with every thrust, hot and wet with pre-come. The slick slide of it is so arousing, Cas can't help but press harder against his stomach, rocking his hips harder into him.

"Oh fuck," Dean gasps, reaching down to grab the backs of Cas' thighs and pull him deeper, "fuck baby, right there- don't- fuck-"

Cas adjusts his angle to hit the same spot again, and when Dean goes all but limp beneath him, his cock twitching against Cas' stomach as he moans, Cas moves faster. The pressure in his gut builds, and it's taking everything in him to keep from losing control and just slamming into Dean and taking what he needs. He keeps his position, pressing into Dean's prostate with every thrust, and biting at his jaw.

"Harder," Dean rasps, "fuck me hard, baby." And it's that damn name again that pushes him over the edge of his control, and Cas slides his arms under Dean's shoulders, gripping his shoulders and slamming into him. Dean cries out, curling one hand into Cas' hair again and holding their heads together with the other. He moans into Cas' mouth, his breath catching with every forward thrust, and Cas licks into his mouth, groaning every time Dean tugs his hair.

He moves frantically underneath Cas, his hips jump up to meet Cas' with every thrust, the curses dropping from his lips more frequent, and increased in desperation. Pre-come spurts from the tip of his cock, easing Cas' thrusts against him, and Cas knows he's getting close. He slams into him harder, the heat swirling within him just about boiling over. Everything is hot and wet and sticky, and Dean feels so damn good against him. He mouths at his neck, his jaw, stretching up to meet his lips.

Dean shudders beneath him, and a desperate 'oh god' falls from his lips before he's coming hard, both hands tangled in Cas' hair. He arches up against Cas and the wet heat of his release covers both of them. Dean clenches hard around him, his cock still rubbing against Cas' stomach, and Cas can't hold back any longer.

Pressing his forehead into the couch above Dean's shoulder, he snaps his hips hard, fucking into Dean as he shoots deep within him, his cock twitching as he buries himself deep with one final thrust. Dean tilts his head, kissing Cas' neck and massaging his head as he comes down, panting into the couch and just barely keeping himself from collapsing on top of Dean.

"Cas?" he breathes, his voice shaking.

"Hm?" Cas replies, his nose still pressed into Dean's shoulder.

"That was amazing."

Cas huffs a soft laugh and rolls himself toward the cushions, gathering Dean into his arms, and kissing the back of his neck. Dean shifts so he's comfortable, pulling Cas' arm around him, and presses back into him, "I'm glad it was you," he whispers.

"Hm?"

"I'm glad my first time was with you." Cas hums his approval, pushing his nose into Dean's hair and kissing down the line of his neck. There's a short pause and then, "why did you offer?" Cas shifts awkwardly, pulling his arm away, and Dean turns to him, confusion prominent on his face.

"I-" Cas sighs, and pulls his arm away, "back in high school, I had feelings for you that never really went away, and I just wanted to help you. I know what it's like to question everything you've ever known about yourself, and I didn't want you to have to go through that alone."

"You have feelings for me?"

"You would get stuck on that point," Cas huffs. Dean chuckles lightly and shifts so they're nose to nose.

"Honestly, I've been having these dreams lately..." he glances away, "about you."

"Hm?" Cas asks, his eyes following Dean's movements.

"I wanted to figure out if what I was feeling was real, or just because of these stupid dreams."

"And?"

"I think that's pretty clear."

Cas leans back into the couch, pulling Dean with him. Dean leans into him, pressing their mouths together softly, lips sliding together smoothly, "so where does this leave us?" he asks.

"Crammed onto a too-small couch in my living room," Cas chuckles, kissing Dean's jaw, "we could... move to my room if you'd be more comfortable?"

"Yeah," Dean grins, "I think I might be." He stands up and awkwardly holds a hand out to Cas, smiling at him until Cas rises up and slides their fingers together. Cas leads them into the bathroom, leaning against the sinking and pulling Dean up against him.

"You've redecorated," Dean grins, and Cas shuts him up with a kiss, reaching behind him to find a damp cloth. He cleans them both up and Dean takes the cloth from him, dropping it into the sink behind him and kissing him firmly. Cas parts his lips, deepening the kiss and drawing Dean up flush against his chest. He runs his hands up through his hair and Dean immediately presses a knee between his thighs, pushing him back almost painfully against the sink.

Cas’ breath comes in hot pants against Dean's cheek and he nips at his lips, rolling his body against him. Neither of them stop until Dean presses his hips forward and Cas lets out a low moan against his neck. He pulls away with a sheepish grin on his face, chuckling lightly.

"Bed?" he asks.

"Bed," Cas agrees, wrapping his hand around Dean's and pushing off the counter. He leads Dean into his bedroom, dropping onto the bed and tugging him close. Cas wraps both arms around his thighs, pressing soft kisses into his stomach. He wants to keep Dean like this forever, to pull him down into his bed every night and kiss his lips and neck until the fall asleep tangled together.

Dean kneels down over his lap, pushing him back against the bed and crawling over him to the other side of the bed. Cas rolls onto his side, watching him and Dean slips an arm over his hip and shuffles closer to him. They're curled up close, Dean's breath against Cas' chest, and Cas is nearly asleep when Dean snaps him back to reality.

"Cas?" he asks, tipping his head up to face him properly, "if you still feel, y'know, like you did before, would you wanna do this again?"

Cas smiles and presses a kiss into his hair, "you're sleeping over, aren't you? I don't generally ask people to stay the night if I don't intend to see them again."

Dean twines their fingers together between their bodies, "so that's a yes...?"

"You're a lot more confident than you were earlier," Cas hums.

"I didn't think my chances were so good earlier."

Cas kisses him softly, his fingers sliding over Dean's cheek and pushing up into his hair, "you really want to do this?""

"Yeah," Dean breathes, "I'm still not totally sure how I feel about... everything, but I know how I feel about you. I have for a long time, I think, and I want to be with you."

"Me too," Cas dips and kisses him again, "and I think I'd like to take you on a proper date."

"Is that what tonight was, a date?"

"No," Cas laughs, "but tomorrow will be. No one else around to interrupt, just you and me."

"Not even your sexy bartender?"

"Sexy?" Cas raises an eyebrow.

"Not as sexy as you," Dean grins, running a hand up his chest, and nipping at Cas' lips.

Cas huffs a soft laugh, pressing his lips into Dean's, "no. Not even Benny will be there."

"Good," Dean grins, "I can't wait."