Archive of Our Own

There’s nothing in the whole entire world that Tommy hates more than school.

There really isn’t! It’s boring, and long, and Techno said he had to be here so he could “learn.”

(Tommy had called him stupid. He had gotten in trouble for that).

Phil had assured him that it wouldn’t be that bad. That they all went to school, too, and that Tommy would make lots of friends and become super smart and that he’d want to go everyday.

That is not what happened. Tommy hates it here. The stuff he’s learning is too hard, and everyone understands it but him. And everyone is so…mean. They’re a bunch of meanies, and they laugh when Tommy stumbles over the alphabet. They pull at his tail and tug at the patch over his bad eye. They poke and prod until Tommy growls, and then they get him in trouble. They stare as Tommy struggles to count, and they snicker when Tommy skips a number or two.

(It makes tendrils of heat erupt in his cheeks, makes his chest all tight. It makes Tommy want to cry, and he’s thought about telling his family, but well…it’s just…his pack is so smart. Phil’s adult-papers are always covered in numbers, and Techno is always reading big, hard books that Tommy can never understand. Wilbur…well, Wilbur might be a bit dumber, but if Tommy told Wilbur, then Wilbur would tell Techno, and Techno would tell Phil, and everyone would know that he was a big stupid idiot! So Tommy always presses his teeth together and blinks back the hot tears in his eyes instead).

Every morning, Tommy tries to stay home. Growls and snarls as Techno gets him dressed, runs and hides as Wilbur grabs his shoes, whines and howls as Phil picks him up and walks him to the school.

The trip to school is long and cold and stupid, too, but Tommy usually can’t bring himself to fight the whole way there. The trip is like—ten hours long, not even Techno would be able to fight that long!

(Well, maybe he could, now that he has those wings. Except he can’t even fly on them, and he has to walk on a tall cane, like Sapnap. Phil says he might be able to use them in a few years, but right now they’re too weak).

It never works. No matter how much Tommy cries and growls and fights, he always ends up exactly where he is now:

School. In his stuffy, dark classroom, choking back constant snarls and pitiful whimpers.

“Tommy? Have you been listening?”

Tommy startles, jumping slightly in his seat.

“Oh! Uh…yeah?” Tommy stutters. His teacher just sighs, looming over him.

“You’re supposed to be drawing your family. You already have paper and crayons, Tommy, get started please.”

Tommy tightens his lips and nods.

At least coloring is a little fun. Tommy loves coloring at home, so coloring at school is still a little bit cool. Even if these crayons are used, and he isn’t allowed to peel off the papers around them.

Still, Tommy grabs the crayons and begins to color.

He draws four circles, all of which are holding hands. Two of the circles get huge wings, which take up most of the page. They all get big smiles—even Techno, who usually just looks scary and stupid. Tommy is sure to draw the fangs that peak out. They’re an important part, how else would his family eat? Though his pack gets fangs, Tommy gives his own circle ears and a tail.

By the time the teacher comes back around, he’s basically finished. He’s drawn a few trees and a large moon, and he’s in the middle of drawing their house when footsteps near his table.

“Tommy,” the teacher says, and she’s frowning when Tommy looks up. “You were supposed to draw your family.”

“I did,” Tommy says, feeling a bit confused. “This is my family.”

There’s a boy next to him, a stupid one with dark hair and long fangs, and he laughs. “No! That’s not your family!”

Tommy’s cheeks heat up, all warm and uncomfortable. “Uh-huh! It is!”

“No! Look,” the boy says, and he’s leaning into Tommy’s space, now, pointing his finger at Tommy’s drawings. “They’re vampires. ”

“So?” Tommy bites, stopping himself from snapping his teeth because Techno had told him he couldn’t (Tommy had snapped at his teacher the first day of school. He was sent to the prince-ee-pal’s office for a real long time. And they told him he couldn’t do that, that it wasn’t okay to ‘threaten’ or ‘hair-ass’ his teacher. And then Phil had to pick him up, and Phil got all frowny, and Tommy had gotten in trouble with Phil and Techno. It wasn’t a very good first day at school).

“ So they can’t be your family,” the boy says simply. “You’re a werewolf. They’re vampires.” 

“Tommy,” the teacher interrupts with a sigh. “Please just draw your real family. Not an imaginary one, okay?”

“But they’re not imaginary! They’re my family, I live with them!”

“Yeah right,” the dark haired boy says. “Even if you did, they couldn’t be your family. They’re not werewolves. They can’t be a part of your pack.”

Tommy’s face gets all hot again. He feels like he’s sitting too close to a fireplace. “Yeah they can,” he says angrily.

“And they’re vampires,” the boy says, still going like he didn’t even hear Tommy. “You can’t be a part of their coven.”

“Yeah I can,” Tommy snarls again. His hands are starting to feel weird, like he wants to flex his claws, so he clenches them into a fist instead.

“No way!” The kid says with a laugh. “I’m a vampire, unlike you, so I would know. You can’t be in a coven unless that person is also a vampire. You don’t even look the same!

“Yes we do!” Tommy says, and he grabs his paper angrily, slamming it in front of the boy. “Look!” Tommy yells, pointing at the drawing of Phil. “He has hair like me! And,” Tommy says, sweeping his hand across the paper, “they all have fangs, and I do too!”

The boy scoffs. “Yeah, but they have wings. And their fangs are way better than yours.”

Almost like his body is embarrassed, too, Tommy’s fangs begin to ache at the mention.

“Can you control people? Fly? Suck blood, anything?”

Restless, Tommy shuffles his feet, nervously shrugging.

“I bet you don’t even have the link,” the boy says, rather matter of factly. “Look. My parents are vampires, and we can talk any time we want. Watch,” he says, and he scrunches up his eyes real tight. Then he pops his eyes open with a smirk. “I just told them I love them. And they told me it back.”

Tommy frowns. “I…I can do that too! See?”

He scrunches his own eyes. Pushing as hard as he can, Tommy thinks. I love you, I love you, I love you, dad? Wilbur? Phil?

There’s no response. But he can feel the boy across from him staring, so Tommy opens his eyes and stutters, “See? I did it!”

The boy scoffs. “No you didn’t. You’re a liar.”

“No lying, Thomas,” his teacher scolds from behind. “About this or your family members. Now please draw your real family.”

“I’m not lying!” Tommy says, and his eyes start to tear up like a little baby’s. “I’m not!”

“ Thomas ,” the teacher says harshly, and Tommy flinches in his seat. “Do the work properly. Now. ”

“Okay,” Tommy whispers, starting to tremble in his seat. He tries to whimper quietly, but when he blinks fat tears begin to roll down his cheeks.

“Crybaby,” Tommy hears someone across from him mumble, and he can’t do anything but silently shake. He tries to breathe like Phil taught him, but it doesn’t really work. It’s hard to do without the man guiding him.

A new, blank piece of paper is placed in front of him. The crayons in front of him are dull and dirtied, and Tommy doesn’t even want to touch them. But his teacher stands over him, arms crossed across her chest, so Tommy sniffles and reaches for a crayon.

He draws a large gray circle. He gives it pointed ears and sharp fangs, and more tears slip as he draws sharpened claws. He draws several other gray circles, then, giving them all the same traits. In the far, far corner of the paper, as far away as he can from the large fanged circles, Tommy draws a smaller circle. He gives this circle a single blue eye and a square eyepatch, and a scribble of blond hair. Then he draws a big frown.

“Good job, Tommy,” the teacher praises with a sigh. “Your family looks very wonderful.”

Looking at the drawing, Tommy cries.

“Hello, Tommy!” Wilbur cheers, much later in the day. “How was school?”

Tommy clutches the straps of his backpack. “Good,” he lies, like he does every day, and he pretends to be very interested in the rocks on the ground.

“Sorry that I’m the one picking you up,” Wilbur says, “Phil had something come up. It’ll be a long walk home, do you want me to carry you?”

Tommy shrugs, so Wilbur leans down and grabs him.

Wilbur tries talking throughout the trip, but Tommy isn’t really listening. He sits with his face tucked to Wilbur’s chest. His tail flicks irritably back and forth.

“Tommy? You alright?” Wilbur eventually asks, and Tommy just shrugs.

The drawings weigh like stones in Tommy’s backpack. Tommy clenches his fist into Wilbur’s shirt and pretends he doesn’t feel heavy.

Tommy can’t stop thinking about it.

He tries, really, he tries not to. But sitting at the long dinner table, all he can do is stare up at his…pack. They are his pack, they are, it’s just…

They’re all so different from him. Techno and Phil have wings, and Wilbur can control things, and they all have a link…

Maybe Tommy just didn’t try hard enough earlier. Yeah. Yeah! What did that mean kid from school know? Probably nothing. He’s probably an idiot.

It would be easy to test things out. Tommy just has to…talk. Through the link, like his family does!

Then he just has to go out and grow wings. Easy! If Phil could do it, and Techno could do it, then why couldn’t Tommy?

“Tommy?” Phil asks from across from him, shaking the boy out of his thoughts. “Did you want another serving?” He gestures a hand at Tommy’s empty plate.

Perfect. Now is as good of a time as ever.

Yes, Tommy thinks, pressing as hard as he can in his brain. I want another sandwich. And also I want one of the treats we have in the cupboard, please?

His eyes squint, he’s pushing so hard. He even leans forward in his seat, concentrating as hard as he can on Phil.

“Um,” the man says, eyebrows a bit scrunched. “You okay, mate?”

I’m fine, Tommy thinks, pushes, and I pretty please want a treat, please?

There’s another second of silence before Phil chuckles. “I can’t read your mind, mate. If you want something you’re gonna have to tell me.”

Oh.

Tommy sinks in his chair, a bit dejected. Phil didn’t even hear him…

“Are you feeling sick?” Wilbur asks, and he’s leaning over to put his hand on Tommy’s forehead. “You’ve been acting sort of strange today. All quiet. Do you have a fever or something?”

No, I’m fine, Tommy presses, upset, hoping that somehow the words will transfer from his brain through Wilbur’s hand. Listen to what I’m saying, bitch. Listen, listen, listen—

“You don’t feel warm,” Wilbur says with a frown, and he leans back into his own seat. “Just tired?”

Near Tommy, Techno sighs. He presses on the table and stands up, reaching back towards his cane. “I’ll take him upstairs. We’ll see if a nap helps.”

Phil stands, then, hovering a wing over Techno. “ I’ll bring him up. Sit, Techno, I can do it.”

No, I want Techno, Tommy thinks, and he thinks it as hard as he possibly can. Please, Techno, please? I want Dad. I want Dad to take me upstairs, not Phil, please?

But Techno sits back down, and Phil is the one to pick Tommy up by the middle.

“A good nap will help you, huh?” Phil is saying, but Tommy can’t do anything but bury his face into Phil’s shirt.

Please? Tommy presses one more time, desperate for someone to hear him.

I don’t wanna be alone, please? Tommy pushes, lying by himself as Phil exits the dark room. Blankets pool around him like water, almost drowning him. Please? Phil? Wilbur? Dad?

But no one hears, and Tommy falls to sleep on his own.

Tommy does fall asleep, at some point. He only knows it because he’s opening his eyes, even though he doesn’t remember closing them.

It’s all dizzy and weird around him. He blinks real hard, rubbing his hands over his eyes to get rid of the hazy feeling.

There’s no one else in the blankets, which makes Tommy frown. Why was no one with him? Tommy hated sleeping by himself, even if Techno says he has to sometimes (for that matter, Tommy hasn’t slept by Techno in forever. After Techno got his wings, Phil or Wilbur always scoop him up at bedtime, taking him to one of their rooms instead. Even if Tommy asks really nicely to be in Techno’s room. They always look at him stupid and say that Techno needs more room for his wings, which is also stupid because Tommy sleeps with him some nights and it’s just fine, so why can’t he do it again? But they never listen, and all Tommy can do is whimper as he falls asleep).

Tommy thinks real hard for a minute, then frowns.

Oh yeah. He forgot. He forgot all about the mean kid at school, and the way no one in his family heard his bond, and…and…

Tommy takes a big sniffle, then rubs his hands at his eyes even harder.

It’s okay. Even if Tommy doesn’t have the link like vampires do, Tommy can still do other stuff! He’s still a part of their coven, just as much as they’re a part of his pack!

Taking a deep breath, Tommy thinks as hard as he can. What else does his family do? What can Tommy be a part of?

The most obvious difference are the wings that Techno and Phil have. Wilbur doesn’t have them, though, and Tommy wants to be like Wilbur, too. So what can he do?

His first thought is Wilbur’s guitar. Maybe he could learn to play? But anyone could play guitar, not just vampires and not just coven. That wasn’t special enough.

Wilbur has long fangs and sharp nails, but Tommy already has that, too…

Then it hits Tommy.

Of course! Wilbur’s special voice!

It seems obvious, now that Tommy is thinking about it. It’s just that Wilbur doesn’t use it very often. Sometimes, Tommy asks him to use it on Techno to make him do funny stuff, but Wilbur says that it’s “rude” and “viol-ateing.” Which Tommy thought was stupid. The last time Wilbur had used it was on Henry, when he told her to walk all the way to their house. And it worked! Henry had walked right into the pen Techno had built without a leash or anything.

It’s super cool. And if Tommy can do it, he’ll use it for much cooler things than just bossing Henry around. Tommy would make Wilbur dance for him, or sing his favorite songs all of the time! And he’d make Phil fly him around, as high as Tommy wants. And he’d tell Techno that he wants to sleep in his bed again, and Techno wouldn’t be able to say no.

Tommy is excited, now, and his tail wags so fast as he jumps out of bed.

This would prove that mean kid wrong! Maybe Tommy could even make him do something. Techno probably wouldn’t like that, but Tommy could just make it so Techno wasn’t upset with him, and that would be that.

He runs down the hall as fast as he can, skipping the steps as he tumbles down.

“Whoa,” Techno says, and when Tommy looks up from the steps Techno is there! “A lot of energy all of a sudden. You just tired, earlier?”

No, Tommy hadn’t been tired, but Techno is just watching him so Tommy shrugs. “I’m gonna go outside!”

Techno frowns. “We’re cleaning up in here. You’re going to have to wait until one of us can come out there with you.”

Tommy pouts right back at Techno’s frown. “But I don’t wanna wait inside. I just wanna see Henry, please?”

Now Techno’s eyebrow twitches, and he opens his mouth like he’s about to say something but Wilbur comes out and says something first. “Come on, Tech. He’ll be fine, as long as he stays in the garden.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m worried about. That he won’t.”

“I will!” Tommy says, reaching up a hand and tugging at Techno’s pants. “I won’t even go anywhere this time!”

“We’ll be done in a bit,” Techno says.

“Just let him outside, Techno. You can’t keep him under watch forever.”

“I absolutely can,” Techno rumbles, and there’s an edge of a growl to the words.

Then Wilbur tugs on Techno’s sleeve, and he gently bumps Tommy away. They step closer to the sofa and lean into each other, facing away from Tommy.

This means that they want to talk, and they don’t want Tommy to hear. They’ve done that a lot after the incident. Tommy doesn’t really understand why, though. Phil says that they just talk about boring adult stuff, and that Tommy wouldn’t even want to hear it, but Tommy doesn’t understand why they would be talking about that stuff right now. Tommy just wants to go outside, what’s wrong with that?

Impatient, and a bit irritated, Tommy whines. A growl starts to come out, too, but Tommy swallows it down before it can escape.

The whine draws the two men out of their huddle. Techno stays back, looking upset, and for a moment Tommy gets a little bit scared. But then Wilbur steps forward and he says, “do you promise to stay with Henry, Tommy?”

“Yes!” Tommy exclaims, and he runs over to Wilbur and reaches up, until Wilbur picks him up and holds him to his chest.

“No, wait,” Wilbur says, placing a hand on Tommy’s forehead before he can slam them together. “I’m being very serious. Don’t go into the woods, Tommy, not even the outskirts. Not even if you see something cool. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” Tommy huffs, and he pushes against Wilbur’s hand.

“ And if you see anything or anyone, no matter who or what it is, you yell as loud as you can, okay? Right away.”

“Okay,” Tommy says, and he’s starting to get irritated again. He already understands, he just wants to go outside!

“Even if it’s Dream, or George, or Sapnap. Even if it’s someone you know, you scream and you run inside and get us, okay?”

“ Okay! ” Tommy whines, and he forces Wilbur’s hand away and quickly bumps foreheads. “Now can I go outside, please?”

Wilbur smiles. “Yes, you can. We’ll be out in a few minutes,” Wilbur says, dropping Tommy back on the ground.

Excited, Tommy yips, running around in circles before bounding out the door.

“Henry!” Tommy calls, slamming the door behind him and scampering down the steps. “Henry! Henry!”

There’s a low moo from the small shed, and Tommy lets out a little bark in response. “Henry!” Tommy yells again. It’s fall, so there’s a bunch of crunchy leaves on the ground, which Tommy stomps on as he scurries towards the animal.

Thankfully, Henry is already sauntering towards the pen. Tommy didn’t even have to wake her up!

Using his tiny fingers to slide open the lock, Tommy slips through the gate. He reaches up and pets Henry’s snout.

He doesn’t have time for petting, though. This is serious! The sooner that Tommy proves he’s in coven, the better.

“Alright, Henry,” Tommy says, taking a step backwards. “Do…um…”

Huh. What should Henry do?

“Um…eat…eat grass, Henry! Eat grass!”

Except…Henry doesn’t even do it. She lets out a deep breath, and rubs her snout against Tommy’s hair, but she doesn’t even lean towards the grass along the fence line.

Tommy pulls his lips back, showing his teeth but still not growling. “Come on, Henry! Listen to me! Eat something!”

But Henry still doesn’t eat. She just stands there like she’s stupid, blinking and doing anything but eating.

This time, Tommy does growl. “Fuckin’ do it! Eat, Henry, please!”

Tommy needs this. He needs this! If he can’t be like Wilbur, then—then—

Henry must be stupid, because she moos one more time before turning and walking away.

“No! Stop!” Tommy cries, but Henry just keeps walking. She didn’t listen to that, either…

Which means…Tommy couldn’t do it. Tommy doesn’t have a special voice, Tommy isn’t like Wilbur…

There’s a weird feeling in Tommy’s chest now. Tommy tries to breathe past it, but even that is getting harder to do. Phil calls it his “big feelings,” and usually holds him through it, but—

But Tommy can’t see Phil. Not like this, not when he doesn’t even have a link, and he’s stupid and small and nothing like Wilbur, nothing like his family—

Except. Except!

The wings! It’s Tommy’s last chance, it’s the only thing left that Tommy can think of.

But how? Phil had said that only vampires could do it, and only in emergencies—

Tommy whines, then growls to himself.

That’s the whole point! Tommy is like a vampire, and this will especially prove it! With giant wings in his back, no one would be able to say he wasn’t. He’d prove that he’s a part of their coven, and they’re a part of his pack.

Tommy just needs an emergency. But looking around, Tommy doesn’t even know where to start.

How did Phil get his wings? He said something about his wife, but—but Tommy doesn’t have a wife! And he doesn’t even know where to get one!

The feeling is back in Tommy’s chest again, even worse than before.

What about Techno?

Techno had got his wings by running into a church. But Tommy doesn’t have a church, either, the only church he knows is the one…

Tommy whimpers, pressing his hands against his eyes and ignoring the harsh flick of his tail.

He can’t go back to that one, anyway. It’s in the woods, and Wilbur made Tommy promise he’d stay in the garden.

So how? What can Tommy do as an emergency?

There’s a few frantic seconds of looking around. There’s Henry’s pen, some flower patches, the edge of the woods. Tommy’s little plastic shovel, the porch steps, the house…

Tommy stops. He takes a few steps back, his head tilting upwards as he looks towards the roof.

That’s dangerous! That has to be dangerous! All Tommy has to do is get up there and then…jump off?

The thought makes Tommy feel a little sick, but he quickly shakes his head.

He can’t be scared. He has to do this.

It takes Tommy a bit to get up to the roof. But after a few repositioned crates, a climb on the fence, and a final jump and scramble, Tommy manages to get to the top of the small barn.

It’s easier to get from the barn roof to the house roof. The roof near the front of the house is lower than the roof near the back, and it’s also right above the shed roof. Tommy still has to jump a little to reach it, but then he’s on the roof, just like he planned!

Tommy lets out an excited little yip, then does an excited little dance. He did it! Sure, his body hurts a little bit from his few tumbles, and his fingers are a bit red from every time he had to pull himself up somewhere, but now he’s here!

Now all that’s left to do is jump!

Which seems easy. It really does, until Tommy peeks over the edge of the roof. Then he just feels sick again, and it seems very, very hard.

It’s such a long way down. What would happen if Tommy’s wings didn’t come out?

Tommy shakes his head. He can’t think like that!

But…but the ground is pretty far down. Tommy doesn’t think he’s ever jumped this far…

It’s making Tommy a little dizzy, so he steps backwards and away from the edge.

Tommy can’t be scared. He has to jump, has to if he wants to be a part of his family! How else would he get his wings?

There’s a sound of a door opening from below. It makes Tommy freeze.

“Tommy?”

It’s Techno! This is perfect! Tommy will get his wings and Techno will be right there to see!

“Techno!” Tommy calls, excitement leaking into his voice. “Dad!” Tommy yells, because Techno is his dad, and he’s going to prove it right. Now.

He takes a few steps back on the roof, at the same time that Techno steps out further into the garden so they can see each other. He looks—well, Tommy can’t really tell from all the way up here, and he’s not paying too much attention anyway. Techno is going to be so happy when Tommy matches him!

The fear is pressed down now that Techno is here. Tommy leans forward, ears twitching in the cold wind, then sprints one, two steps, catching the edge and leaping off—

It’s over in a blink. There’s a quick second of rushing wind, in which Tommy squeezes his eyes shut real tight, before there’s an oomph as hands snag around Tommy’s stomach.

Then his eyes pop open, looking down at his dad.

“Dad!” Tommy says excitedly, immediately beginning to wiggle around. “Look! Look! I got—”

Tommy stops.

There…isn’t anything. No matter how Tommy twists and turns, trying to see his own back, there’s nothing. There’s no wings sprouting from his shoulder blades.

Nothing happened. Nothing happened.

Tears immediately fill Tommy’s eyes, but he doesn’t get a second to think about it. He’s pressed to Techno’s chest, suddenly, and even though Tommy is about to cry there’s no soothing hand down his back, by his ears. The grip itself is just a bit too hard—it’s too tight, and Techno’s fingers dig in. He doesn’t even say anything. He just marches towards the front door.

Techno doesn’t open the door, he slams it, and Tommy can’t help the way he flinches.

Techno is upset. Why? Is he mad that Tommy didn’t get wings? Does he think Tommy is stupid, now, too? The thoughts bring more tears to Tommy’s eyes, but he doesn’t get a chance to think about it before he’s dropped onto the sofa.

“ What. Were you thinking?” Techno growls. The sound makes Tommy shrink backwards.

“I just—I just wanted—” Tommy’s stuttering, but he can’t get the words out. Techno is glaring at him, all mean-like, and Tommy is too nervous to talk.

Techno’s mouth opens again, then snaps shut. His hands are opening and closing, clenching into big fists, and Tommy whimpers as he watches them.

“I—I wanted wings—”

“ Wings ?” Techno says, low and loud. “You threw yourself off a damn roof, Tommy, how the hell would that have done anything ?”

Techno just keeps getting louder, and Tommy’s feeling that thing in his chest again. He feels scared, terrified as he switches between Techno’s face and his clenched fists. “I just—”

Wilbur and Phil step into the room, then, eyebrows all pinched and weird. “What’s going on?” Phil asks, rushing over to Techno.

“That was dangerous, Tommy,” Techno scolds, not even listening to Phil. “Do you understand? That was stupid, that was—”

“I just wanted wings!” Tommy cries, and a sob chokes out. Why is Techno yelling at him? Why is Techno being mean?

“That could have killed you. You can’t manifest wings, why the hell would you—”

“Okay, alright,” Phil interrupts, and he puts his hand on Techno’s arm. “Go outside, mate. Cool off.”

Techno growls, and his wings ( wings, wings, wings ) flare out, and Tommy just keeps crying.

Phil says something else to Techno, but he leans in real close so Tommy can’t hear. Then Techno huffs, and growls, and he storms away and slams the door again. It’s scary, and loud, and Techno is so mad , and Wilbur follows after Techno so he must be mad too.

“Tommy,” Phil says, and even he sounds upset. “What did you do, baby?”

“I don’t know!” Tommy wails, and Phil kneels to look at him.

“You do know. What happened? Did something happen outside?”

Tommy feels absolutely sick, and his head hurts and his chest feels icky, and all he can do is nod.

“What did you do?”

“I—I jus’ wanted wings,” Tommy whines again, and his ears flatten as he hiccups around another cry.

Phil just frowns. “Oh, Tommy. We’ve talked about this, remember? You can’t manifest wings. Only vampires can do that, baby.”

It makes Tommy cry harder. It makes him cry, and cry, and cry, cry until his throat hurts and claws ache, and Phil tries to say nice things but none of it matters.

Tommy can’t get wings. Tommy can’t get wings, and he is not a vampire, and he is not coven, or pack, or family.

Then Tommy is taken to bed. Wingless, voiceless, bondless, he sobs himself to sleep.

Tommy finds the mean kid the second he gets to school the next day.

He’s shaking a little bit already, and his ears keep flicking nervously. But he still pulls out a seat next to the boy and sits.

The kid makes a weird sort of noise. “What are you doing here?”

Tommy can feel his face getting hot already. “Um. I was just wondering…If I—how would I become a part of coven?”

The kid blinks. “Oh. But you’re not a vampire.”

The heat gets worse, but Tommy just nods, shifting his gaze to the floor.

“Well, you’d have to be a vampire, first of all,” the kid says. “So someone would have to turn you.”

Tommy frowns. “How?”

The kid shrugs. “They’d just have to like—bite you. On the neck! And my mom says it really, really hurts. I was born a vampire, so I didn’t have to be turned, but,” the kid trails off, and he shrugs again.

Tommy’s heart tugs in his chest a little bit. He doesn’t want it to hurt, not really. But… “They just have to bite me?”

“I guess. And there’s like, poison or something that they put in you.”

The thought sends a nervous chill down Tommy’s arms. Poison? Tommy doesn’t want to be filled with poison, doesn’t want to be bit, either.

His old pack had always said that the vampires would kill him. That they ripped out throats and ate them, that they would drink all of Tommy’s blood until he was all wrinkled and withered, like a grape.

Then they had chased Tommy into their territory.

And they had been…wrong. For the most part. They hadn’t killed Tommy, hadn’t drank anything from him or even touched his throat. But Tommy had never really tested it. Now, Tommy had to offer his neck. What if they decided to kill him? What if they got upset, and instead of turning him they just hurt him (except turning apparently hurts, too, so how would Tommy know the difference)?

“If they turn you, they’re coven,” the boy continues, like he doesn’t even care that Tommy is thinking right now. “And the person who turns you is your sire. That means they’re in charge of you!”

“Like Phil,” Tommy says.

The boy frowns. “Who’s Phil?”

Tommy shifts in his seat a little. “Um. He’s my family. He—he’s the coven leader. That’s what Techno says.”

“Okay, then Phil would have to turn you,” the boy says certainly.

“But what if I want someone else to turn me?”

The boy frowns, then leans back in his seat, like he’s thinking about it real hard. “I guess that would be fine, probably. They would just be your sire instead.”

Yes. Yes, that’s what Tommy wants. Tommy loves Phil—really, he does—but he wants Techno to turn him, to be his sire—his alpha, if Tommy will even still be a werewolf after being turned.

“Are you trying to join Phil’s coven?” The boy asks. “Are they the ones you drew yesterday?”

Tommy nods.

“Oh. Well I hope they accept you! That would be cool!”

It would be cool. And Tommy very much hopes the same.

Tommy waits very, very patiently that night.

He feels sick, all weird in his tummy, so weird he can’t even eat. Not even when Phil offers him a cookie from the cupboard, and Tommy loves those cookies.

Mostly, Tommy just spends his time in the living room, playing with toys and pretending that he doesn’t feel icky. Then, when it’s finally bedtime, Tommy strikes.

Rather than wait for Phil or Wilbur to come find him, Tommy sneaks around the house until he finds Techno. He’s seated in the kitchen while Phil cleans up next to him, but as long as Tommy makes it to Techno first it should be fine.

As fast as he can, Tommy scampers across the kitchen tiles, running until he bumps right into Techno’s leg. “Techno?” Tommy asks, trying as hard as he can to widen his eyes and pout his lips. “Can I please sleep with you tonight? Please?”

Techno blinks down at him, his wings twitching slightly from behind him. Then, “Sure.”

“Techno,” Phil says, pausing from where he’s wiping down the table.

“It’s fine,” Techno says, leaning down and grabbing Tommy’s middle. He hoists him up against his chest.

“Techno,” Phil says again, and he’s making that weird face. The kind they make when they want to talk about adult things without Tommy around.

Techno misses the look, though, too busy walking away and not looking at Phil. “It’s fine,” he calls out one more time, but he doesn’t turn around. Just walks up the stairs and towards his bedroom.

Tommy’s chest is starting to hurt, now, and the icky feeling in his stomach is only getting worse with every step Techno takes.

Techno doesn’t notice. He lies Tommy in the bed first, then places his pajamas right next to him. Tommy is quick to change, and by the time he finishes Techno is changed too.

When Techno lies in bed, Tommy shuffles to lie on top of him. Chest to chest, just like it used to be.

All Tommy has to do is wait, now. Wait for Techno to pull him up, bite him, poison him. It makes his entire body shake, but he clenches his fist in Techno’s shirt and tries to be so patient.

“You cold, Tommy?” Techno rumbles, reaching over to tug the blanket over Tommy’s shoulders.

Tommy has to bite back a huff. He is NOT cold. He feels hot, actually. Palms all sweaty, warm and uncomfortable.

Techno doesn’t get it, though, even as Tommy presses as hard as he can against the vampire’s chest. Techno just brings an arm over Tommy, patting a hand against his back.

Tommy has to stop a growl. Techno’s not doing it! He’s just lying there like an idiot.

Maybe Techno doesn’t understand. So Tommy starts to wiggle on his chest, pushing his way closer to Techno’s face.

“Whoa, hey. Kid.”

Tommy doesn’t stop. Not until he can feel Techno’s breath against his neck.

This is it. It’s going to hurt so, so bad, but it’ll be worth it. Techno will bite Tommy any second now, and Tommy will finally be coven, and Techno will finally be pack—

“Tommy,” Techno grunts, and he—

He’s pushing Tommy back. Away from his fangs, away from his face. Pushing him back towards his chest.

He…he didn’t bite him. He didn’t turn Tommy.

He…he doesn’t want Tommy. Doesn’t want him in his coven. Doesn’t want to be a part of Tommy’s pack. Doesn’t…doesn’t want to be Tommy’s dad?

Across from him, Techno is just staring. With his stupid eyebrow raised, and fanged lips drawn, and Techno doesn’t want him anymore.

Tommy can’t help it: he bursts into tears.

“Oh—kid,” and now Techno is reaching towards him, and Tommy flinches backwards.

If Techno doesn’t want him anymore, what’s stopping him from yanking him? From hitting him?

Tommy screams through his cries as Techno reaches forward once more. He scrambles backwards on the bed, all he wants to do is get away from Techno.

The boy can hardly see through the thick tears pouring down his face, but he can see a blur of blond as the door clicks open.

“Tommy?” Phil is asking, and that’s just as bad as Techno! Phil is being nice right now because he thinks Techno still wants him. But Techno and Phil are coven, family, and when Techno tells him that Tommy is useless, Phil will hate him too!

The thought makes Tommy wail even harder. Even Phil is reaching for him, now, he’s trying to throw him out!

“What’s happened?” Wilbur calls from the door, apparently just getting in.

And this…this could work.

Wilbur always says Techno is stupid. Maybe he would think Techno was stupid about this, too! Even if Wilbur didn’t turn him (and Tommy…didn’t really want him to. Tommy wanted Techno to be his alpha, his sire), he wouldn’t make him leave. Wilbur would call Techno a big dumb stupid idiot, and he’d save Tommy!

So Tommy screams and hiccups, reaching desperate hands out towards the tall vampire.

“Oh, darling,” Wilbur is saying as he scoops him up, pressing him close to his chest. “What happened? What’s going on?”

Tommy can’t even answer. He wants to, really, he does! But he can’t stop crying, can’t stop howling and hiccuping and shaking at the force of his sobs.

“Breathe, Tommy. Remember?” Phil is saying. “You have to breathe, like this.”

Then something cold breaches his forehead, and Tommy screams and flinches back.

It’s cold, and it stings against his skin. Like a cold palm, a smack, a hit , Phil’s hit him —

Tommy doesn’t even know what’s happening anymore. He’s scared, so scared, and he can’t even breathe. He tries, and he tries, but it all gets stuck in his throat. He closes his eyes and his dad is yelling at him, ears flipped and fangs drawn as he screams at Tommy. Then it changes, and it’s Techno yelling at him, blood dripping from his fangs and claws and when Tommy watches it fall, it drips onto grass, they’re outside, Sapnap is lying on the ground and he isn’t moving, hands and claws are grabbing at him, Tommy is dying, no one is coming to save him, no one wants him and Tommy is dying —

And there’s—there’s—

A vibration. Near his head. Tommy doesn’t know what that is, either, he reaches out a hand and grips Wilbur’s shirt as hard as he can.

Tommy is scared. So scared, but the vibrations don’t stop even as Tommy continues to cry. When Tommy focuses on the vibration, he forgets about yelling and blood and claws, so he takes a deep, gasping breath and tries as hard as he can to focus.

“—usually always works.”

“I don’t know! I’ve hummed his calming songs, his happy songs, everything! What’s wrong, Tommy, what’s wrong? We want to help you, please say something, Tommy.”

Cries still block any words from leaving Tommy’s throat. Everything is wrong, Tommy is scared, he’s alone and he’s scared—

“Maybe he’s sick. Let me see him—”

Tommy screams again as Techno’s hands touch him. They pull at Tommy from where he sits, but they quickly retract.

“—sick, we’ll have to check him out right now, whether he’s crying or not. If it’s this bad, it could be serious,” Phil is saying.

“But what if he’s not? I don’t want to freak him out more . Oh, come on, darling, please? Breathe, Tommy, you have to tell us what’s wrong.”

“I’ll take him,” Techno is saying again, and Tommy cries louder.

They’re going to take him, and then throw him outside, and then kick him and beat him and scratch him and—

“Stop it, Techno!” Wilbur says, the words vibrating along his throat and against Tommy’s forehead. “You’re obviously scaring him! Knock it off! Tommy, darling, listen, please. Breathe, okay? You’re scaring us, Tommy, you have to breathe. Look, I’ll breathe too, okay? Like this,” Wilbur is saying, and he grabs Tommy’s hand and places it against his chest. The large breath causes Wilbur’s chest to rise, up and down, and Tommy knows he’s supposed to be following it but it’s so hard , Tommy is so scared and he doesn’t want his family to hurt him, except they’re not his family and they don’t want him anymore and Phil has already hit him, Tommy doesn’t want to be alone again—

“Another breath, darling,” Wilbur instructs, and his chest rises again.

Tommy has to listen. Maybe if he listens, they won’t hit him again, maybe they won’t hurt him as bad—

He chokes through a breath. It hurts his throat, and it ends with another sob, but Wilbur coos as if he did well.

“Good! Good job, Tommy!” Wilbur’s voice sounds a bit wobbly, as if Tommy isn’t actually doing that well. “Another one, alright? With me, help me breathe, okay?”

Wilbur’s chest rises, and Tommy takes an unsteady breath in. It’s hardly anything, but Wilbur gives a shaky smile. “So good, Tommy. Can you tell us what’s going on, now? Or do you want more breaths?”

Tommy wants more breaths, his chest still feels all tight and he still can’t breathe, but he’s not stupid. Not as stupid as the kids at school say, anyway, Tommy knows that Wilbur isn’t really asking. So he opens his mouth to speak, but even then a sob rips through and he can’t choke out the words.

“It’s okay, Tommy, you’re alright,” Wilbur is saying, bouncing a little up and down.

It’s not okay, and it’s not alright. Tommy needs to say something before Wilbur decides to hit him, too—

“‘M sorry,” he gasps, claws flexing into Wilbur’s shirt. “‘M sorry, ‘m sorry, ‘m sorry—”

“Oh! It’s okay, Tommy, it’s okay, don’t be sorry! You don’t have to be sorry. What—”

“Please don’t hit me,” Tommy cries, and his own hiccuping sobs are interrupting him again. “Please, please, please—”

“We wouldn’t,” Techno is rumbling, but Tommy’s back is to Techno so he can’t see him. “We would never, Theseus. You know we wouldn’t.”

Except Phil had just hit him earlier, and now Techno’s hands are grabbing at him again  and all Tommy can do is wail—

“Please! I don’t wanna leave, I don’t wanna leave, I don’t wanna leave—”

Wilbur steps away from Techno, pressing Tommy closer into his chest. “What do you mean, Tommy? We’re not going anywhere, why would you be leaving?”

“Because you don’t want me anymore!” Tommy cries, and he sobs so hard his head hurts.

“Oh, Tommy—”

“You don’t want me! I’m not even your family!”

“Oh, Tommy, of course you are!” Wilbur coos. “Why would you even say that?”

“Cause—cause I’m not a vampire, I can’t be coven!”

“Of course you can, Tommy,” Phil says, sounding confused. “You don’t have to be a vampire to be a part of our coven.”

“I…I mean, if you wanted—” Techno starts, and Phil smacks his arm as Tommy cries harder.

Tommy was right. Techno doesn’t want Tommy unless he’s a vampire, but he won’t turn him and Tommy can’t do anything about it!

“Oh, he didn’t mean it like that, Toms,” Wilbur says, shushing and bouncing Tommy. “He’s just being stupid.”

Except Techno probably did mean it like that, because Tommy looks over and Techno’s eyes are all wide and weird, and his fingers keep twitching in his lap, and he’s staring at Tommy and it’s scaring him!

Phil has leaned over to Techno’s ear, but then Wilbur starts turning in slow circles, and when Tommy can see them again Phil has straightened up.

Seeing Phil standing straight scares Tommy even more. Standing up, Phil could yank at Tommy, could use his big wings to fly him away, use his big claws to scratch at Tommy—

Tommy needs to escape, now. He screams again and slams a hand against Wilbur’s chest, digging in his claws and pushing away. “Fuck you!” He cries this time, and he wiggles as much as he can.

“Okay, we’re not getting anywhere,” Phil says, and he steps closer and Tommy growls real loud. “Breathe again, Tommy. Take your breaths, it’s okay.”

It’s not okay, Tommy doesn’t want to take his breaths again. He wants to fight and run away before any of them hurt him, but Wilbur has started taking big breaths again and Tommy hasn’t even managed to break free. Tears keep streaming down his face as he takes gasping breaths.

It takes forever before Wilbur finally stops doing the breaths. When he does, Phil asks, “Can Wilbur put you down? Just on the bed, just so we can all see you.”

It’s scary on the bed—that’s where Techno is, and where people can grab him. Tommy shakes his head no.

“Okay. That’s alright, mate. Can we talk a bit? I want to know what’s upsetting you.”

Tommy doesn’t really want to talk. He’s super thirsty, and his throat hurts and his face is itchy, but he also doesn’t want to make Phil more mad, so he shrugs. Wilbur brings up a hand and starts to pet by his ears.

“Alright. What happened, Tommy, what brought this on? Who said you couldn’t be in our coven?”

Tommy sniffs, loudly trying to keep his cries down his throat. “Um…Miss—Miss Teacher,” Tommy babbles, and his voice shakes all weird when he talks.

“Your teacher said that?” Techno says, and his voice is low and growly again.

Tommy hides his face in Wilbur’s shirt and nods. “Yeah. ’Cause I—'cause we had to draw our families, and I drew you, and she said it was a fake family. She said I had to draw my real family. And then someone said that I could only be in coven if I was a vampire, and I’m not a vampire, and then Miss Teacher said that I was a liar and I had to draw something else, and I hate that other drawing,” Tommy whines, and another sob leaves his throat. “And now it’s in my backpack and it’s ugly and I hate it!”

“How dare she say that to you?” Wilbur is hissing, at the same time that Techno is standing, grabbing his cane and making his way across the room where Tommy had laid his backpack when he got home. “How dare she call you a liar?”

Techno has ripped open the backpack, now, and he’s rummaging through the bottom until he pulls out two balls of paper. The backpack is dropped to the floor, and the papers are returned to the bed.

Wilbur marches over to the bed and leans over as Techno uncrumples the first one.

Tommy lets out another sob. It’s four circles holding hands, wings and fangs so different from the ears and tail.

“Oh, Tommy,” Phil says, leaning over too. “That’s so sweet, baby. Is that us?”

“It’s beautiful,” Wilbur is saying, but he’s still hissing it, like he’s angry. “It’s absolutely beautiful, Tommy, your teacher is an idiot for saying anything about it.”

Techno doesn’t say anything. He holds the paper for a minute, then sets it down gently and opens up the other one.

A growl immediately leaves Techno’s throat. Tommy looks at this drawing and cries harder.

Then Techno stands, and his claws rips through the paper. He tears it, then tears it again, then keeps tearing until it falls to the ground in little squares.

“They are nothing,” Techno growls, “nothing. We are your family, they are dirt underneath our heels. They will never be anything to you, you’re ours. Ours, Tommy, no matter what that damned teacher said to you.”

Tommy shakes his head, growling a little in his own frustration. “Nuh-uh! Cause—cause I don’t have wings, or a voice or anything! I’m not a vampire and you didn’t even want to turn me! You—you don’t want me anymore!” Tommy wails, and when Techno grabs at him there’s nothing he can do but wail harder.

Tommy waits for pain. Tommy waits for claws against his face, for fangs against his neck, for a harsh slap or kick—but none of that happens. He’s tucked into a chest once more, and arms wrap around him.

“Wrong,” Techno says, like it’s the easiest thing in the whole wide world. “You don’t need any of that, Tommy. You’re our coven, you’re ours. ”

“Yeah, Tommy,” Wilbur says, “that teacher was wrong. And so was that bitch of a kid.”

“You don’t have to be anything but yourself,” Phil murmurs, and he comes closer.

“Nuh-uh, you’re lying,” Tommy whimpers.

“I’m not. We’re not. You’re perfect, Tommy,” Techno rumbles. “You’re ours.”

Tommy doesn’t understand. He’s nothing like them, nothing like his family, but he’s tired and aching and all he can do is beg, “You…you still want me?”

“We still want you, Theseus,” Techno murmurs, “You’re still our family. And we’re yours. Promise.” And then he leans down and presses his forehead against Tommy’s forehead, his long hair hiding Tommy’s face like curtains.

Tommy starts crying harder, even though he isn’t sad. Techno holds him, his dad holds him, and when he lies on the bed everyone else lies with him.

They sleep curled up like wolves, like pack, and when Techno curls a wing around him, he thinks maybe they sleep like coven, too.

Tommy had hoped school would be done forever.

It had been, for a while. The next night, Tommy had woken up all on his own, not to anyone’s pestering. Rather than walk him to school, Phil had cooked him a really big breakfast, and Techno had sat with him outside, and Wilbur had played him some songs. He didn’t even have to go to school the night after that! Tommy had been woken up early, but they had all walked to Dream’s house instead. Then they had all gone to school, while Tommy got to stay and play with Dream and George and Sapnap. Tommy remembers thinking that it’s okay if his family went to school. They were too big to be picked on, and probably way smarter than all of the kids in there. Maybe even the teachers!

But after a few days, Phil woke up Tommy early at night again. And they had pulled on his shoes, and given him his backpack, and no matter how hard Tommy cried they had all still walked him all the way to school.

“It’ll be alright, Tommy,” Phil had said. “You’re in a new classroom, with a different teacher, and different classmates. It’ll be better this time, mate.”

“You tell us if it’s not,” Wilbur said, “we won’t let them be mean to you again.”

“You can’t stay out of school forever,” Techno had said. “Just try.”

And now Tommy is here. Sniffling and hot-faced, standing alone in a new classroom. It’s scary, and Tommy doesn’t know anyone in here. It’s like the first day of school all over again, and that had been bad enough the first time. Tommy doesn’t want to have another first day of school.

“Welcome, Tommy!” His new teacher says, and even though she’s smiling Tommy still feels sad. “I’m so glad to have you in our class! I’ve laid out your things right by your chair. Why don’t you sit down and we can find you something to do?”

Tommy doesn’t want to sit down. He wants to growl and snarl and run away, but he also doesn’t want to get in trouble again. So instead, he slowly makes his way to his seat, sitting down and doing another big sniffle.

Other kids are still coming into the class, so Tommy sits by himself. There are a few toys on the table, but Tommy doesn’t even want to touch them. He just wants to go home. The more Tommy thinks about it, the more tears come into his eyes. How long until he can go home? Why does Tommy have to be in school again ?

Tommy whimpers, then shrinks down into his seat, furiously rubbing at his eyes. Then—

“Hello?”

Tommy jumps with a yip. There’s a boy next to him, now, leaning way into his space. It doesn’t help that the boy has tiny horns, which, though aren’t very big, still invade Tommy’s personal bubble.

“Are you okay?” The boy asks, tilting his head a little. “You’re sort of crying a little bit.”

It’s bad to do so, but Tommy draws back his lips so his fangs show.

The boy just blinks. “Are you sad ‘cause you’re new? I’ve never even seen you before.”

More tears well up as the boy says it. Tommy gives a sad nod.

“Oh! That’s okay!” The boy reaches over, then, and Tommy flinches, ready for a pull of his ears or a flick against his eyepatch, but the boy just rests his hand against Tommy’s back, rubbing it in circles. “That’s okay! I used to be new too, but now I’m here and I’m not new! And you won’t be new, either!” The boy grins, then leans back. “I’m Tubbo! So now you don’t have to be sad, cause I’ll be your friend so you’re not new anymore. Okay?”

Tommy still feels a little bit scared, and a little bit sick in his stomach, but he nods anyway.

Tubbo immediately pulls him to a colorful carpet, showing off his favorite toys and games. It’s fun, so fun that Tommy doesn’t even realize that it’s time to go home until his teacher calls for him.

“Tommy,” she says, and she smiles at him. “Your family is here to pick you up.”

And when Tommy looks up, they’re there! In the doorway, not outside like usual.

“Whoa! Is that your family?” Tubbo asks, and Tommy freezes.

“Um…yeah.”

“That’s so cool!” Tubbo grins, and then falls back on his butt. “I’m sad that you’re leaving. Are you gonna be back tomorrow, Tommy? Please?”

And Tommy really didn’t want to come back to school. Except…except today had been fun. And he thinks he would miss Tubbo, if he were to stay home all the time.

“Okay,” Tommy says as Phil leans over and picks him up, and Wilbur presses closer to give him a hug and Techno steps towards him to ruffle his hair. “I will!”

In the arms of his family, Tommy thinks he can’t wait for the next day of school.