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Stepping into their motel room, Hopper gently squeezed the hand that firmly grasped his own. Murray had insisted his two friends share a room, and neither Joyce nor Hopper had protested. Exhausted, he was grateful for the refuge. His whole body ached from months of abuse, and only he knew just how close he had come to giving into the darkness that had enshrouded him. The one thing that had kept him alive was knowing that somewhere in the world there existed two people that he loved- that loved him. By nothing short of a miracle, they had arrived safely to Alaska and would complete the final leg of their journey to Hawkins the following morning via a private jet arranged by Agent Stinson. They had also been reassured that their children were safe and en route to Hawkins, secretly being escorted by a trusted team of Dr. Owen's agents.
Hopper closed his eyes as he drew strength from the woman standing beside him. Joyce Byers was both the tiniest and strongest woman he knew. Stronger than the toughest war general, it was her strength, perseverance, and heart that had saved them all so many times. Saved him. He owed her his life, and she owed him nothing. Feelings of doubt begin to fill his head again. Unworthy. Undeserving. Cursed. Last night he slayed a powerful Demogorgan from another world, and yet he was still struggling to conquer the monsters from within. Hopper quickly scanned their room, taking in the decor. Compared to his digs the past eight months, it was palatial. A table, two chairs, a dresser with a small television. One bed.
Murray. Hopper wasn't sure if he should thank him or strangle him. Although he had shared a few intimate moments with Joyce in the Soviet Union, he did not want to be presumptuous on where they stood or place any pressure on Joyce that could make her feel uncomfortable. The last thing he wanted to do was screw this up. For some reason beyond his comprehension, he was being gifted a second chance at life… at love. Certainly, he would not be given a third.
"Hey, I…" Hopper began, awkwardly clearing his throat. "I can go to the front desk and ask for an extra blanket. I'll sleep on the floor, I-"
"Hopper." Joyce whispered, gently placing her fingers gently on his lips. "That won't be necessary. I want this…" she motioned between them with her hand. "I want you."
Why? He wanted to scream. Why do you want me? I'm a curse and I destroy everyone I love. "Joyce, you risked your life to save me. You left your home, your job, your kids… " His voice cracked, an invisible force tightening its grip around his throat. Fear. Anger. Self-Hatred. All of the emotions he had buried deep within the darkest part of his soul were now brimming at the surface, threatening to consume him.
"Jim, look at me." Joyce reached up, softly cupping his face, so he had no choice but to look into the deep brown eyes that bore into his own. "I told you, I knew the risks, I knew the cost. I chose this path, and I would choose it one thousand times. I choose you."
"Why, Joyce, why?" He asked, daring to voice the question that had been replaying over and over again in his mind since the moment he saw her walking towards him in the prison. His miracle. He took a deep breathe and continued, his voice trembling, barely above a whisper. "Why would you choose this? Why would you choose to save me?"
"You're going to make me say it, aren't you? Fine, I will. I love you, you idiot. I love you." Tears were streaming down Joyce's face. "There I said it! I chose to risk everything, because that's what you do when you love someone."
Joyce buried her face in his chest and held him in a tight embrace. As if her life depended on it. Hopper could not hold back any longer, as he allowed himself to cry in the arms of the woman he loved. He cried for Sarah. He cried for a life, for a family he once had. He had loved and lost and maybe, just maybe, he would have that chance once again. A year ago, he would have been mortified to bear his soul so blatantly to another. A year ago, the pills and booze had done an effective job at keeping the demons at bay, numbing the pain that had threatened to consume him. Sober, he was now forced to face his demons head on. No longer afraid, he realized, as he was armed with the most powerful weapon of all, the only force capable of defeating the most formidable of foes - love.
Hopper wiped his eyes, pulling back from her embrace. He needed to tell her, he needed her to know. "Joyce, all those months in that prison, you were the miracle I prayed for… hoped for. Even in the darkest moments, I never stopped believing that somehow you would find me." Gently caressing her check with his fingers, he took a deep breath and continued. "I love you. I've loved you since the moment I saw you walking down the hall on the first day of middle school. I loved you when we would smoke under the steps between 5th and 6th periods. I loved you even when you went to Winter Ball with Lonnie Byers. Joyce, it was you, it was always you. I know I haven't been the man you deserve, but I want to spend the rest of my life being that man. If...if you'll let me."
"Hop, is this a proposal? It feels like a proposal." Joyce smiled, her eyes sparkling.
Hopper chuckled. He had missed their playful banter. "Would you say yes?" His heart pounded in his chest as he waited for her reply. If she said yes, he would go straight to Murray and insist he marry them right then and there. Surely his friend who was fluent in Russian would also have the ability to officiate a wedding.
Joyce laughed in response, peppering his neck with soft kisses. "Ask me again on our first date at Enzo's next Friday, 7pm. You can pick me up."
"Gotta have dessert," he whispered, pressing his lips against hers. Joyce opened her mouth, deepening the kiss. She moaned softly as her tongue pushed hard against his. Hopper tightened his grip on her hips as lifted her up. Joyce instinctively wrapped her legs around his waist, both desperate to feel more friction.
"Hopper….Hop…" Joyce gasped as he accelerated his ministrations. "Hopper- stop!"
Hopper immediately stopped. He gently let go, allowing Joyce to find her footing beneath her. He took a step back, hoping he hadn't just crossed a line.
"Hop," she began, wrinkling her nose. "We just killed some monsters in a Russian prison. We need to take a shower."
She was right. He smelled horrible. "You first. I want to make sure you have hot water."
Joyce rolled her eyes, grabbing his hand as she pulled him to the bathroom door. "I don't think you heard me. I said we need to shower. You know… together."
Hopper's heart skipped a beat. He still had a hard time believing that she wanted him. "Are you sure?"
"Jim Hopper," Joyce began, turning around to face him, giving him the look. Hopper knew that look well enough to know he needed to shut up and follow orders. "If you don't take those clothes off and get in that shower by the count of three…"
Hopper laughed as he scooped up his woman, carrying her into the bathroom. Who needs imagination he thought, smiling widely, as he closed the door behind them.