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“Did you hit your head when you took that last tumble during flight class? Because, quite frankly, I think you’ve lost your mind, Azul.”
Azul looked offended. “Excuse me!? My flight performance has nothing to do with this request, Jamil, and I’ll kindly ask that you refrain from speaking of it when we aren’t on the field.”
Jamil zipped up his gym bag and slung it over his shoulder as he spoke. “That’s fair. I suppose you’re normally this delusional, after all. I was giving you far too much credit.”
Azul frowned.
Jamil smirked.
“Really,” Azul sighed, picking up his own bag and hurrying to catch up with Jamil’s brisk pace back towards the direction of the Mirror Chamber. “I don’t see why you think my request is so strange!”
Jamil gave him a flat look in return. “You want me to go with you to a fancy restaurant tonight, for ‘research purposes for Mostro Lounge,’ something you could easily do by yourself?”
“Oh, Jamil. For someone as smart and clever as yourself, you really can be so foolish.”
“Hey.”
“As you’re aware, we have just begun the month of February.”
Jamil didn’t like where this was going. “...So?”
“So,” Azul continued, “now is the time for any business worth their salt to take advantage of the goldmine that is the spirit of Valentine’s Day coming up.” A greedy grin spread across Azul’s face as he clasped his hands together. “I simply wish to observe how other businesses are preparing, so that I may get Mostro Lounge into its most alluring state on the big day.”
Jamil shivered at the creepy grin on his classmate’s face. He could practically see the dollar signs in Azul’s eyes. “Jeeze, you don’t even try to hide your true intentions anymore, do you?”
Azul only smiled again. “I have nothing to hide when I’m with you, Jamil. I think you and I understand each other on a level that others couldn’t even begin to comprehend.”
Jamil rolled his eyes. “Mhm, sure. I still don’t get why you need me there.”
“Most of these establishments are holding special events and sales for couples. I can’t quite get an authentic experience if I show up alone.”
“Well then, can’t you ask someone else? Jade and Floyd work with you, surely one of them would be a better business-scoping partner?”
“Oh, please.” Azul scoffed. “Surely you’re familiar enough with Floyd from being on the basketball team together to know that he is not the type to bring anywhere that requires a prolonged sense of decorum or self control.”
“Yeah, I definitely can’t argue with you on that one. What about Jade, then?”
“Do you really expect me to subject myself to the psychological warfare that would come along with taking Jade on a fake date?” Azul rolled his eyes. “I honestly get enough of that from him on a regular day.”
“Well,” Jamil spoke with a wry smile, “you must not mind psychological warfare that much if you’re asking me to go with you.”
A chuckle. “I quite enjoy our banter, actually.”
Jamil rolled his eyes. “How nice for you.” He then stopped walking, realizing they’d already reached the mirror chambers. Apparently, it had been another day where Azul indirectly tricked him into walking back from class together.
“I suppose this is where we part ways for the time being,” Azul said as he turned toward the Octavinelle mirror. “I hope you will give my request some thought, Jamil.”
Jamil paused in front of the Scarabia mirror, hesitating in spite of himself. “…what’s in it for me?”
Azul turned back around, one foot already through Octavinelle’s portal. “Is a free dinner not enough for your liking?”
“You, offering free food?” Jamil narrowed his eyes. “I don’t buy it.”
Azul pulled his foot back out of the mirror and walked over to where Jamil stood. “Certainly you won’t ‘buy it,’ if I’m paying.”
“Very funny.” Jamil rolled his eyes, again. “Nothing’s ever free with you. That’s kind of your thing, right?”
“Listen, Jamil, you’re really thinking about this too hard. It’s a simple transaction already: I have a companion for the evening, and you don’t have to pay for a thing. Besides,” a sly grin formed on Azul’s face, “we get a discount, attending as a couple.”
“Ugh, you look so creepy when you’re scheming.” Jamil turned back towards the portal. “Whatever. I’ll think about it.”
“Do let me know.”
With that, Jamil stepped into the mirror without a glance behind. He wasn’t really sure what possessed him to even consider such a ridiculous request. Having classes all day with Azul was annoying enough, so surely there was no way he’d agree to hanging out alone with him, outside of school hours.
Except, that’s exactly what Jamil decided to do.
Maybe it had something to do with the not-so-subtle photos from the menu that Azul texted Jamil of the restaurant’s specialty curry.
Or, maybe Jamil just knew if he declined the invitation, Azul would find a way to be extra annoying about it for the rest of the week. Jamil could practically hear Azul going off on one of his overly dramatic monologues of how he just wants the best for his business and if only he could find a kind soul to help him out…
Yes, somehow the less annoying option was to go on a fake date with this guy.
“Ah, Jamil!”
Speak of the devil. Azul stood from the bench he had waited on in front of the chosen restaurant and strode over to Jamil.
Jamil gave Azul a once-over. “I’d say you clean up nice, but you’re honestly dressed about the same as you do for your dorm uniform.”
Azul smirked. “Is that your way of telling me I look handsome every day?”
Jamil furrowed his eyebrows. “That three piece suit you Octavinelle guys have to wear every day is pretty over the top. I guess if we’re comparing, you actually look underdressed right now, compared to your normal look.”
“Really, at this point I can’t tell if you’re complimenting me or insulting me.”
Jamil really wasn’t sure either.
Azul cleared his throat. “No matter. Shall we go in?” He offered an arm to Jamil.
Jamil didn’t move.
“Oh, come on, now.” Azul sighed. “I’m only asking for a couple minutes of pretending, just to sell the act and secure the deal.”
‘Is it really so dire that we need to go the extra mile to ‘prove’ to a bunch of strangers that aren't even asking for proof in the first place that we’re a ‘couple’?”
“Yes. I want those discounts, Jamil.”
“...Fine,” Jamil sighed, looping an arm through Azul’s. Coming between Azul and his money just wasn’t a battle worth fighting.
Inside, a tall, well-dressed man greeted them at the front counter. “Good evening. Do you have a reservation?”
Azul smiled, giving Jamil’s arm an unnecessary pat before speaking. “A table for two, under ‘Ashengrotto’.”
The host checked the screen on his podium for a few seconds, before stepping out to lead them back into the dining area. “Right this way.”
The venue was not quite what Jamil had expected, though once he had a moment to take in the theme, he really couldn’t be too surprised. Azul had brought him to what appeared to be a fancy dinner lounge, not unlike the one he ran back at school. Similar to Mostro Lounge, this place had a center stage, where a band of musicians currently stood, playing slow, smooth, and some might even argue romantic music.
Well, it was that time of year, after all.
“Your server will be with you shortly,” the host remarked, as he placed two menus atop the table and headed back across the room.
Jamil looked at the seating, and then glanced around the rest of the room. There were some tables scattered about the edges, further from the stage, that were your standard seats-facing-opposite each other. The seats closer in around the stage, however, were half-booths, open to face the stage for assumedly optimal viewing.
Jamil and Azul’s table was, in fact, a stage viewing seating. The two slid into their spots, Jamil noting that it felt much more crowded than it looked as he tried to keep to his side to avoid their shoulders from colliding too much.
“Well, now,” Azul spoke again, aiming a smile to Jamil. “That wasn’t so painful, was i-”
“Oh, no way.” A familiar voice cut Azul off mid-sentence.
The two whipped their heads around and made eye contact with none other than Ruggie Bucchi, who stood over their table in a waiter’s outfit, an ear-to-ear grin plastered across his face.
“Do my eyes deceive me, or is my next table over here Azul and Jamil, out to dinner, together?!”
Jamil sighed. “Hey, Ruggie.”
“Good evening, Ruggie.” Azul continued, another polite smile spread across his face. “Just how long have you been working in this establishment?”
“This’s only my second week. Lotta places are hiring extra hands for the mushy Valentine’s Day specials they’ve got goin’ on, and you know I’m not about to miss out on that! Fancy places like this pay pretty well, too…” Ruggie trailed off for a moment, glancing around the room, then back at the two before him. “...Wait, wait, wait.” His grin grew wider. “Are you two here on, like, a date?”
Jamil’s eyebrows immediately furrowed together, wondering if Ruggie had seen them walk in together, arm in arm. “We’re n-”
“Why, yes, as a matter of fact, we are,” Azul spoke before Jamil could deny the accusation.
Jamil shot Azul a look, but Azul continued smiling politely at Ruggie, who looked shocked.
“Yo, wait, seriously!?” Ruggie didn’t even try to hold back his laugh. “That’s crazy! Man, and here I was starting to think that even Riddle and Floyd had a better chance of becoming a thing before you two, and they’re like, the very definition of ‘when hell freezes over’.”
“Well,” Azul kept his pointed smile, reaching beside him to cover one of Jamil’s hands with his own. “I’d like to think the two of us are known for exceeding expectations in any situation.”
Jamil responded with a swift kick to Azul’s shin that was just gentle enough to go unnoticed by Ruggie, but firm enough to deliver the message.
Azul’s hand twitched.
Jamil grinned.
“Psh, yeah, whatever you say, Azul.” Ruggie pulled out a notepad and looked it over. “...Says here you pre-ordered your meals already… What’cha want to drink, then?”
Jamil shot Azul another, more confused, look.
Azul’s annoying smile still didn’t waver. “Please, I simply spared you some time. Don’t worry; I know you well enough to know your tastes, and selected the curry meal for you.”
Jamil scowled, annoyed that Azul made the correct assumption not only when coercing him with menu photos earlier, but also felt sure enough in his choices to go ahead and order. He sighed, glancing at the beverage section for a moment before folding the menu and handing it back to Ruggie. “...I’ll take the peach juice.”
Azul handed his menu back as well. “A cucumber water for me.”
“Alrighty, we’ll get that out for ya real quick.” Ruggie gave them a teasing wink as he turned to leave. “Enjoy your date, lovebirds!”
Jamil waited until Ruggie was out of earshot, before turning to Azul and swatting at his arm. “What was that, you weirdo?!”
“Excuse me,” Azul huffed. “Must you get so violent in a place of class?”
“Did you really need to tell Ruggie that this was a date? Of all people, don’t you think Ruggie would understand the hustle of forming a ruse to save money?”
“You make a valid point,” Azul said, letting his gaze wander over to the musicians on stage as he spoke. “But one can never be too careful in a sensitive operation such as this. You never know who might be listening.”
“Ugh, for god’s sake,” Jamil groaned. “It’s dinner. You’re insane.”
“I’m a businessman.”
“Same thing.”
Just then, Ruggie reappeared with a tray in his hands. “Got your drinks right here, along with the appetizers that came with your pre-ordered meal sets.” As he spoke, he began setting the drinks and plates down. In front of Jamil, he placed a basket of naan bread, a bowl of mango chutney, and a few small serving plates. Azul received what looked to be a chef’s salad.
“Alright, I’ll be back later with your entrees,” Ruggie said as he turned to leave. “Enjoy, lovebirds!” With a snicker, he darted away before either Jamil or Azul could complain.
Jamil narrowed his eyes at Azul and grabbed one of the serving plates and a piece of bread. “You’re in charge of setting him straight when this is over. I don’t want rumors spreading across the school the second we get back.”
Azul offered a smug grin. “Oh, please. Having such ties with someone as well-connected as me would only be beneficial to you. What’s the harm in a few rumors, hmm?”
Jamil rolled his eyes, spooning some of the chutney onto his plate. “It’d be more annoying to have you hanging over my head to remind me how many ‘indirect favors’ you’d be oh-so-graciously causing for me.” He placed the serving spoon back in the bowl and nudged it with the basket over towards Azul.
Azul only raised an eyebrow. “That’s yours. It came with the curry meal I pre-orderd for you.”
“Yeah, so?”
“So, as per our verbal agreement, your compensation for this event is a free meal. That consists of the appetizer, main course, as well as the dessert.”
“Christ, man, it’s bread.”
“So I can see.”
“If you don’t want any, that’s fine, just say that instead of being weird about it.”
“Whether or not I want any is irrelevant. I am holding up my end of this transaction.”
Jamil leaned back into his chair with an irritated sigh as he chewed on a piece of bread for a few moments, before a smirk formed on his face. “...I guess you’ve never been on a date, huh?”
Azul sputtered, doing his best not to spit out the bite of salad he just took. “Wh- Excuse me?! Where did that come from?”
Jamil feigned an innocent smile. “Oh, it’s nothing, really. It’s just that, well, most people on a date understand the subtle intimacies that come with sharing food with your companion.”
Azul knit his eyebrows together. “And just how many dates have you been on that makes you such an expert…?”
Well, Jamil hadn’t been on any dates before, either, actually. And sure, sharing food wasn’t really a necessary part of a date, but it was much more fun to take a shot at Azul’s pride while he had the chance.
Instead of answering, Jamil only gave Azul a coy smile as he took another piece of bread and spooned a little chutney on top. He held it out in front of Azul’s face, a smug grin forming. “Go on, then. If it’s so important to you that we keep up the act, then take a bite.”
Azul’s face grew bright red. “I-I hardly see how that would be convincing or appropriate for this setting!”
Jamil glanced across the room for all of three seconds before spotting another table that had one half of a couple holding out their spoon to their partner in a similar fashion. He nodded over to them, grin widening. “Looks pretty thematically appropriate to me.” Jamil propped his chin up with his free hand, wiggling the bread in front of him again. “Don’t be shy, sweetheart.”
Azul’s breath caught in his throat. “A-alright, alright, fine. Anything to get you to cease this madness.” He leaned forward, focusing his eyes on the bread in front of him to avoid Jamil’s taunting stare. It was hard to even focus as he bit down, but Azul couldn’t deny that the blend of flavor from the herbed bread and hint of sweetness from the chutney did wonders for each other.
As Azul pulled away, Jamil’s phone vibrated loudly on the table. Jamil moved to put the rest of the bread on the other serving plate and slid it over to Azul as he grabbed his phone to read the message.
Azul straightened himself, clearing his throat. “My, Jamil, didn’t anyone ever tell you it’s bad manners to check your phone at the dinner table? And on a date, no less.” He added that last bit with his own smug grin. If Jamil was allowed to tease Azul for this whole situation, certainly Azul could do the same.
“Ugh, whatever.” Jamil unlocked his phone and opened the incoming text, as his phone continued to vibrate with more messages appearing. “You know I have to keep my phone on in case Kalim has an emergency…” He trailed off, focusing on the screen for a moment. Slowly, his eyebrows came together in a scowl.
“...Is something the matter?” Azul asked.
Jamil answered with a glare, then set his phone down between them, screen unlocked, with several texts from Kalim on display. Azul leaned in to get a closer look, tensing up only slightly as he felt his shoulder brush up against Jamil’s.
Kalim: OMG!!!! JAMIL!!!!!!
Kalim: are u and azul on a date right now!?!!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!
Kalim: ruggie just texted me!!!!! He said hes serving ur table at his part time job!!!!!!!!!!!
Kalim: i didnt know you liked azul!!!!!!!!!!!! Omg i’m so happy for you both!!!!!!!!!!!
Jamil rubbed his temples. “I hope you realize what hell this kind of damage control is going to be. Kalim’s probably already told, like, a dozen people by now.”
The phone vibrated again, as another text bubble appeared.
Kalim: cater and lilia are with me and they also say congrats btw!!!
“See?” Jamil sighed. “Those three will have it spread across the whole school by morning, I’ll bet.”
Another text appeared.
Kalim: this is sooo exciting! Jade and Floyd always said Azul talks about you aaaallllll the time, and had like, a HUUUUUUGE crush on you haha. I guess they were right if he finally asked you out!!!! Hows it going so far??? Are you having fun?!?!?!?
The two stared silently at the recently received text. A solid ten seconds passed with neither speaking, and Jamil gave Azul a side-eyed glance, only to see Azul staring wide-eyed, mouth slightly agape at the phone.
His face was bright red, again.
Jamil cleared his throat, picking up his phone from the table and stuffing it into his pocket. If it wasn’t an emergency, Jamil did not feel obligated to reply. “…Kalim’s always running off and telling people nonsense before he has the full story.”
Azul took a breath. “…The twins do love to stir up… rumors.”
“They’re quite a deadly combination when they hang out, aren’t they?” Jamil offered the slightest of smiles.
“Never a dull moment with those three, that’s for sure.” Azul replied, shoulders relaxing just a touch when he made eye contact with Jamil.
Just then, Ruggie appeared in front of them with more plates of food. “Got your round two over here, comin’ in hot!”
With lightning speed, the appetizers were swooped out of the way and replaced with a plate of hot curry over rice in front of Jamil, and chicken parmesan in front of Azul.
“Ruggie, what’s the deal with you texting Kalim about our… business, over here?” Jamil asked, scowl in place.
Ruggie only snickered as he gathered the plates up on his arm. “You can’t blame me for being surprised, can you?”
Azul furrowed his brows in an expression that mirrored Jamil’s. “I hardly see how that gives you the freedom to gossip about our personal affairs.”
“Hey, c’mon now, no need to be shy. Besides,” Ruggie winked over his shoulder as he turned to head back to the kitchens. “Lots’a people were always sayin’ you might make a cute couple, if you ever stopped tryin’ to kill each other!”
With that, he again escaped across the room without waiting for a reply.
Jamil felt his face flush.
Azul stared at his chicken.
As the two frantically thought about ways to diffuse the new tension, one of the musicians in the center of the room walked up to the microphone.
“Good evening, lovely guests,” came his low, smooth voice. “I hope you’ve enjoyed your time with us so far. I would just like to take a moment to welcome a very special couple of guests with us here tonight…” And, to Jamil and Azul’s horror, the man extended his arm in a grand gesture right to their table. “I’ve been told it’s these two lovely gentlemen’s first date tonight! We’re so honored to have you for such a special occasion.”
Jamil wondered if it was too late to excuse himself to the bathroom and escape through the window.
“In fact,” the man continued with a smile, “I’ve been asked to dedicate this next song to our lovely young couple. I do hope you all enjoy,” And as he backed off the microphone, smooth jazz filled the room as the song began.
Jamil leaned over to Azul. “...Do you think Ruggie actually went over to the band earlier and fed him some mushy story just to try and embarrass us more?”
Azul rolled his eyes. “I wouldn’t put it past him. Really, students of Savanaclaw can be ever so childish.”
As the two began to actually eat their food, the singer began.
“You’re just too good to be true… Can’t take my eyes off of you…”
Azul stiffened as the familiar words clicked into his brain with recognition. Surely, Ruggie wouldn’t have suggested a song so…
“You’d be like Heaven to touch, I wanna hold you so much…”
Romantic? Sappy? Embarrassing?!
Jamil continued eating with a glare on his face that would make one think that his curry had personally wronged him.
Azul followed his lead, focusing on the chicken like his life depended on it, but found it hard to think about anything besides the words coming out of the singer’s mouth.
“Pardon the way that I stare, there’s nothing else to compare… The sight of you leaves me weak, there are no words left to speak…”
Azul’s heart hammered in his chest as he glanced over to his side. Jamil’s presence beside him felt so overwhelming for someone who was just sitting there and trying to avoid anything around him. Really, why did these seats have to be so snug?
“But, if you feel like I feel, please let me know that it’s real… You’re just too good to be true… Can’t take my eyes off of you.”
Jamil suddenly glanced over, locking eyes with Azul. “Is there something on my face?”
“Um-”
“I LOVE YOU, BABY!” The singer belted, startling the pair once again.
Jamil sniffed. “...The curry’s nice and spicy. It’s… making me sweat, a little.”
“Ah, g-good, I think,” Azul said, still feeling warm himself. He wondered what management was doing with their thermostat, as surely it was much warmer than necessary in this building.
As the song eventually reached its conclusion, the patrons of the restaurant clapped politely. The singer removed his hat and offered a bow towards Jamil and Azul, who were both just glad the band resumed their quiet ambient music afterwards.
After a few moments of quiet eating, Jamil spoke again: “You must’ve been pretty confident about my food tastes to choose my food for me.”
“They were pre-selected sets, as Ruggie said before. I simply knew you would enjoy curry.”
“And you were quite confident in that decision.”
Azul grinned. “Well, I’m quite confident in my skills when it comes to collecting information on my peers, after all.”
“Ugh, that’s right, I almost forgot how much of a weirdo you are.”
“Did you like it?” Azul asked
Jamil sighed. “I ate it, didn’t I?”
“But did you like it?”
“It… Was nice, yeah.” Jamil gathered up his used silverware, placing them atop his cleared plate, and pushed it to the edge of the table. “...Thanks.”
Azul’s smile softened. “I’m glad.”
Ruggie practically teleported to the table as Azul pushed his finished plates to the side. “You boys enjoy the special performance?” He asked as he quickly picked up their dishes.
Azul scowled. “Was that really necessary?”
Ruggie feigned mock hurt as he gasped. “Why, of course! I couldn’t just let my dear friends’ special day go uncelebrated. You are here for the special Valentine’s experience, after all, aren’t you?” He adjusted the plates balanced along his arms. “Don’t worry; all that’s left is dessert, then you’re free to go.”
Jamil watched Ruggie slide Azul’s plate of chocolate cake across the table, and it stopped with perfect accuracy right in front of him.
“Enjoy!” Ruggie called as he slit a bowl towards Jamil and turned to leave.
The bowl slid towards Jamil with the same smooth accuracy, stopping just in front of him. Jamil looked into the bowl.
Azul fidgeted with his fork. “...Jamil, would you like to try some of my- OOF!”
“BUG!” Jamil’s fight or flight had kicked in as his body jerked to the side, clinging to the nearest thing - or body - beside him. “IN THE BOWL!”
“Wh-What?!” Azul asked, his brain stalling over the fact that Jamil had thrown his arms around his neck and was hanging onto him like his life depended on it. He reached over for the bowl and pulled it closer, causing Jamil to tense up further and duck his face into Azul’s shoulder.
After a few seconds of silence, Azul began to laugh.
“What’s so funny!?” Jamil demanded, barely picking his face up from Azul’s shoulder.
“Why, Jamil, my dear, don’t tell me you’re afraid of a few dried dates scattered on your sorbet?”
Jamil immediately shoved himself off Azul, looking closer at the bowl. He sighed, laying back against the booth and pinching the bridge of his nose. “God, of course it was dates.” He scooped one up with his spoon and flung it onto Azul’s plate. “You take them. I hate dates.”
Azul raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing on his lips. “I sense there’s a story here behind such an… intense reaction.”
Jamil returned his smirk with a scowl of his own. “A story you’re not getting tonight.”
“Does that mean you’ll enlighten me on another night?”
“Keep dreaming.”
Azul chuckled, then reached for his fork again. He plucked the strawberry off the top of his cake and held it between them. “I’ll trade you for the dates, then. Unless you have some sort of strawberry-related trauma that I’m unaware of, as well?”
Jamil kept the glare on his face as his eyes shifted from Azul to the strawberry on the fork between them, and, without warning, he swooped down and bit the strawberry off the fork, offering Azul a wink. “No trouble here.”
“Um,” Azul fumbled a moment, nearly dropping his fork.
Jamil dropped the remaining dates onto Azul’s plate and started eating the sorbet like nothing happened.
“...I guess they can’t all be winners.” Azul said as he took a bite of his cake.
Jamil gave him a puzzled look. “You don’t like it?”
“Oh, no, not mine. I meant for you.” He picked up a date with his fork and waved it around. “I was so close to having selected the perfect meal rotation for you, but these little things brought quite a… surprising turn of events.” He smirked, biting the date off the fork.
Jamil glared at Azul. “You are not to talk about that to anyone.”
“Oh? You don’t think the twins would be entertained to learn more about their dear schoolmate?”
“We both know they’d be more than entertained, so keep your mouth shut, or else I’ll tell everyone that you had to bribe me to go on a fake Valentine’s Day date with you, for your weird business schemes.”
“...Oh, right!” Azul suddenly ducked down beside the table, rummaging through his bag for a moment, before handing Jamil a small handful of papers. “Why, I’d nearly forgotten. If you could just fill those out for me by Monday, that would be greatly appreciated.”
Jamil stared at the papers. “Wh… Are these… Review forms?”
Azul smiled. “Yes. It would help me greatly to get your feedback on the overall experience. That way I have a better idea of what to focus on as I tailor the Mostro Lounge’s new seasonal event!”
Jamil put his head in his hands. “Are you seiro- WHY are you like this, Azul? I can’t believe you want me to write a formal review about a fake date.”
“If you do this simple favor for me, then I can assure you that you’ll have nothing to worry about in regards to your little… secret.”
Jamil swiped the papers off the table. Had this evening really been the less annoying option, in the end?
Azul continued to smile at Jamil.
Jamil smacked him over the head with the papers.
“Hey!”
“You are so stupid sometimes…” Jamil sighed and stuffed the papers away.
As if on cue, Ruggie once again seemed to materialize right at the table, clearing away their plates. “Feel free to take this brawl outside, gentlemen,” he said with a snicker. “Azul is already prepaid, so you’re free to go. Just don’t forget to leave your favorite server a generous tip, okay?”
It was Azul’s turn to sigh in resignation, knowing it would simply save him the trouble to tip well, despite the antics pulled on them that night.
“Y’know,” Jamil said as the two exited the building. “Authentic dates don’t come with homework. I certainly hope you aren’t going to leave formal review forms with everyone’s bills at the lounge.”
Azul would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought of doing exactly that. Sure, asking your kind-of date to fill out a review was maybe a little weird, but what was so weird about a place of business asking for reviews from its patrons? “...Of course not. But, it is very important that I get your thorough and honest opinions filled out as soon as possible. Can I count on you?”
“Sure, sure, whatever.”
Jamil sat at his desk after returning from his shower for the evening, and stared down at the papers he’d gotten from Azul. He figured it’d be best to get this weird assignment out of the way so he wouldn’t have his classmate pestering him about it every few hours. The first page - god, of course there were several pages - was pretty standard. There were questions about ambience, food taste, entertainment, temperature, and so on.
The next page, however…
On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate the enjoyment factor of your company for the evening?
“...What?” Jamil mumbled to himself. Was Azul asking Jamil to rate him? Just what kind of questionnaire was this?
He looked to the next question.
Please list three positive feelings you had about your company for the evening, as well as three things you think could be improved on in the future.
Future…? Jamil wondered if Azul really was going to hand out these forms to his patrons next week…
On a scale of one to ten, how likely are you to agree to go on another date together?
Of the following, which settings or activities appeal to you as a potential future date suggestion? Circle all that apply: Movie, Museum Tour, Picnic Brunch, Zoo, Dinner (New Location), Dinner (Same Location)...
Jamil found himself snicker at where Azul had penciled in “but with a server that’s not Ruggie.”
And then, the final set of questions…
Multiple choice.
Jamil, will you be my date this Valentine’s Day? Circle one: Yes/No
Jamil’s face grew warm. Clearly, this was no generic questionnaire. He kept reading.
Free response.
Please address any questions, concerns, or suggestions you might have from this evening that can further improve the Mostro Lounge Valentine’s Day experience.
The back and forth between emotions and business tone was giving Jamil emotional whiplash.
Underneath the final question, the paper read: Thank you for participating in this study. Your cooperation is greatly appreciated. Depending on your answers above, you can expect your feedback to be taken into consideration in order to prepare a special, reserved table on the night of February 14th. Please return these forms to Azul Ashengrotto once completed, and expect any further correspondence, if required, within 1-3 business days.
Jamil could not believe the absurdity he was perceiving upon the paper that lay in front of him. Really, there were few at this school weirder than Azul himself.
Jamil couldn’t help the smile that had snuck its way on his face as he read through everything a few more times.
Of course Azul of all people would find the most corporate way possible to try and ask his classmate on a date.
Jamil picked up his phone to send off a text.
Jamil: So, about that second page of questions…
Azul responded within minutes.
Azul: Please keep any and all feedback contained to the appropriate response fields.
Jamil rolled his eyes.
Jamil: Stop talking like a sentient exam. Are you going to make me fill out paperwork every time we go out?
A few minutes passed. Jamil could see Azul starting and stopping his typing about a dozen times before another text came through.
Azul: Every time…?
Jamil smirked at his phone.
Jamil: Your answer to this question may be a determinant factor to the outcome of my quiz. Please think long and hard before submitting your response.
Azul: Very funny.
Azul: No, the quiz is a one time thing.
Jamil: Thank you for your participation. Do I have to use a #2 pencil when I fill this out? Were you supposed to give me a scantron along with it?
Azul: 😒
Jamil laughed at his phone, setting it down beside him and getting to work on the papers in front of him with a smile.