Work Text:
The brat was lagging behind.
They had been partners for several months now, having gone on a handful of missions to test Deidara’s limits and talents, so Sasori knew his opinions on waiting were drilled into Deidara’s little blond head. It seemed they weren’t sticking at all.
“Will you hurry up!” Sasori snapped out, jerking Hiruko’s head around to glare at the blond.
Deidara was a few yards behind him, leaning heavily against a tree and his arm hugging his lower stomach, teeth gritted and breathing hard. “Give me a minute, hm. I just…just one minute. That’s all, Danna.”
Sasori hazarded moving closer, carefully assessing Deidara as he did. He showed no signs of being hurt, save for clutching his stomach, and no one had gotten close enough to land a hit on him during the mission. He could be suffering an adverse effect to the poison Sasori had released during the mission, but given how high Deidara had flown, it was unlikely. He could be faking it for a break, which might be likely given how little of a break Sasori usually allowed.
“Does your stomach hurt?” Sasori asked mockingly and Deidara glared sharply at him.
“No, I’m just holding it for funsies. Yes, it hurts!” Deidara snapped, before groaning and thumping his head on the tree, ignoring the glare he was receiving.
“Show some respect for your seniors, brat. I could just leave you here,” Sasori snapped, turning Hiruko back to the path. “Since you’re oh so ill , we’ll find a place to rest for the night. There’s an inn a few kilometers ahead and we’re not expected back until tomorrow anyway.”
He was surprised when the blond didn’t immediately perk up at the thought of sleeping indoors for once, only grumbling about how far it was as he pushed off the tree, trudging up to Sasori while still holding his stomach. Maybe he was ill after all.
*~*
Sasori watched as Deidara threw himself onto the bed, curling up on his side as he groaned, hands working to undo his hair tie, his cloak already thrown across the first chair he saw. Sasori had even been kind enough to exit Hikuro once they got to the inn and book them a room, a single bed with an ensuite bathroom, while Deidara had miserably sat waiting on the dirt. He didn’t need sleep, as he had explained to Deidara the first time he had rented one room for both, so it didn’t make sense to get a separate one; he had been awfully fussy the first time Sasori had roomed with him, and had only recently gotten used to the idea.
Deidara stayed unmoving on the bed as Sasori made himself comfortable on the floor, opening Hiruko and rummaging around for a certain scroll, already planning which puppets he could improve in the time it took Deidara to sleep.
Just as he found the correct one, Deidara suddenly jumped up, rushing quickly into the bathroom and slamming the door behind him. He stared after the blond, head tilting at the action. Deidara usually wasn’t in such a rush as he knew Sasori’s status as a puppet, so there was no fear of him going into the bathroom for any reason.
Maybe he was more ill than he let on, suffering from food poisoning after the dango stall he insisted they stop at. And while Sasori didn’t care about that, having a partner who was sick would certainly slow down progress, especially one that pretended they were fine.
He got up and approached the door after waiting far too long, pausing just outside of it. He could hear Deidara muttering inside, sounding suspiciously like he was chanting “no”, and water running. He knocked on the door, hearing Deidara quiet immediately.
“Are you still alive, brat?” Sasori asked and he could hear Deidara give a nervous laugh.
“Yes, Danna! You can’t make me into a puppet yet, hm!” Deidara laughed again, sounding a little hysterical. “Just give me a few more minutes! I’ll be right out!”
“You’ve been in there for twenty minutes already,” Sasori pointed out and silence answered it. “I’m coming in.”
Deidara protested very loudly at that but Sasori had already thrown open the door, pausing at the scene that greeted him. Deidara was hunched over the sink, still wearing his shirt but legs bare, as his pants were in his hands, dripping wet from where they had been scrubbed. There was a rather large blood stain visible on the leg seam, dripping pink water down onto the tile, as well as the water in the sink a dark pink. There was also, now that Sasori looked, blood running down the inside of Deidara’s thighs, as well as a beyond horrified expression on the blond's face.
Well, this certainly explained a lot. Especially the blond’s sudden moodiness and temper, along with the insistence on stopping at every dango and mochi shop they came across.
“What the fuck, Deidara?” Sasori finally asked, scrunching up his nose. He was glad he couldn’t smell anything as he was sure it wouldn’t be pleasant. “Why did you say anything?”
“I didn’t know!” The blond wailed, surprising Sasori with his sudden outburst, tears welling up in his eyes as he squeezed his pants. Sasori ignored the sound of water hitting the ground. “I didn’t know and I don’t have anything for it or spare clothes and now you know and you’re gonna think I’m a freak and I wanna die and you know what, Danna, you can turn me into a puppet right now, that would actually be the preferred, just end me right now!”
“As tempting as an offer as that is, I’m going to need you to calm down first,” Sasori said in what he hoped was a soothing manner but came out in the same bored tone he always had. Oh well, anything else might have freaked the blond out more. “Just…calm down. Put the pants in the sink and sit down, I’ll be right back.”
With that, he turned and made his way from the room, uncaring if the blond actually followed his orders. While he hadn’t delt with something like this since he left Suna, his grandmother had made sure to at least inform him of this cycle of a woman’s life. Though he was sure Deidara had said he was a guy…
He went straight to the front desk, where the innkeeper was still seated. He gave a quick but hushed request to the woman, whose eyes had widened. She scurried off into the back room, reappearing a few minutes later with a bag sitting atop a pair of folded pants, as well as several dark towels and another blanket.
“Just leave them outside the room when you’re done, along with any messing clothes, we’ll wash them, on the house,” the innkeeper said kindly, offering a smile Sasori didn’t return. “Tell her I hope she feels better, it’s always such a rough time, especially when it’s unexpected.”
He nodded and took his leave, riffling through the bag as he made his way back to the room, finding it containing a clean pair of underwear and several pads as well as a note explaining how to use them. Good, at least Deidara wouldn’t be completely lost. There was a vile of pills as well, a brand he recognize for pain.
He headed back to the bathroom when he arrived, finding Deidara slumped in the bathtub, knees drawn up and head in his hands, looking downright miserable. He was breathing heavier than usual, little hitched heavy sounds; crying or having a small breakdown, Sasori couldn’t tell and he would rather not deal with either of them. Instead, he carefully avoided the wet puddles on the floor and set the items down on the toilet.
“Here. Clean this place and yourself up, and throw everything bloody into the basket. The innkeeper will wash it all,” Sasori ordered, glancing at the blond as he closed the door behind him. Deidara didn’t even look up at him.
He settled himself in front of Hiruko, opening a scroll to summon a puppet to work. After a few minutes, he could hear shuffling from the bathroom and the water turn on. He half-listened as he began to tinker with the puppet’s arm, noting idly that Deidara was taking longer than he usually did.
Well, he could have expected that. There was a lot of blood to clean up.
“So, you’re a girl?” Sasori asked as Deidara emerged from the bathroom, hair still dripping and wearing the pants the innkeeper had gifted, and had wrapped the blanket around himself. Sasori could only assume Deidara had figured out how it all worked.
Deidara glared sharply at him, setting the bottle of pills onto the nightstand before climbing into bed, cocooning himself in the blankets. “No, I’m a boy. I just have girl parts and they’re fucking annoying.”
Sasori shrugged, returning to his puppet’s arm. “I can remedy that for you.”
“You’re not turning me into a fucking puppet,” Deidara muttered, wrapping the blanket tighter. “This sucks, why did it have to come now? What bullshit, I’m too old now so it shouldn’t have come at all.”
“People develop at different rates. You’re just a late bloomer it seems,” Sasori hummed, shaking his head when Deidara flipped him off. “When we get back to the hide-out, we’ll have to inform Leader and Konan. Leader so he won’t put you on too strenuous of a mission until you can handle them, Konan as I’m sure you’ll like someone to talk to as well as someone who can get you your supplies.”
“Fine with me,” Deidara said, pausing for a moment. “Thanks for not making this a big deal.”
Sasori didn’t respond and Deidara’s breathing eventually evened out, signaling he had fallen asleep. Sasori found his ability to fall asleep near someone who had expressed a desire to turn him into a puppet both amusing and incredibly stupid, kind of like Deidara himself.
So, his new partner was born a girl. Quite the secret to keep but luckily for Deidara, Sasori loved collecting them.