Chapter Text
“Hello, Internet and Welcome back to my channel, today is a very momentous occasion, I am proud to announce that earlier this morning Gabriel Agreste was murdered by a fellow inmate who was a Priest Sentenced to life in prison I will be throwing a party with my Housemates and friends to commemorate this amazing day that will surely go down in history as the best day of my life, so far. Now I’m sure you’re all wondering why you are so happy that your dad died Adrien? Well, guess what, if you don’t like child abuse or neglect skip the next 15 minutes of this video.”
15 minutes later
“And that is why I am happy my dad died, I know that that is probably a controversial topic but I think a Hollywood child actress wrote a book about it something about her being happy her mum died, so if you can speak or reads English read that and tell me if it’s any good, I don’t really have the time or energy at the moment. I will be planning my Dad’s funeral in the next week so I won’t post this just yet, but I will after the funeral, which I will film,” Adrien says and stops the recording.
He collapses on the couch and cuddles up with one of the pillows burying his face in it and wishing to be absorbed by the couch.
Marinette chooses that exact moment to lift up his head and sit down where it was.
‘Adrien I know that you might not want to mourn your father, or if you do you might not want to talk about it, and that’s completely fine, but if you do ever want to talk about it we will always be here for you, and if you don’t want to do anything we can plan the funeral for you, just tell us what you need or what you want and we will try our best to do that,” Marinette says fiddling with his hair.
“We will always be here for you Adrien, we love you and you’re our friend,” Chloé, who he hadn’t realized was there until now says moving his legs so that she can sit under them, with his feet on her lap.
“Having someone you care about die is really hard, especially when you don’t want to admit that you’re mourning, or if you were angry with them before they died. When my dad died I was furious with him, I had had an argument with him that day before I left. We had been arguing about Ronnie dropping out of University, and he had blamed me for some stupid reason and I had yelled that I always got blamed for the things that Ronnie did and that it wasn’t fair, I was so angry at him that at first, I thought that he had died just to make me forgive him, I knew it was a terrible thing to think, but it was my first thought and I hated that.
I know that we are in very different situations, but if you ever want to talk I’m here,” Marinette says, taking the pillow off his face and fiddling with his hair.
***
“Hello and welcome to the funeral we planned, the guests are only my friends, Nathalie and my old Bodyguard as funerals are for the living not the dead and I don’t want to spend time with some boring socialite models who don’t actually care about me,” Adrien says to the camera and then he swaps it from selfie mode to pan around the room which is his living room with some decorations saying stuff like “I’m happy you’re dead” “Congratulations on outliving Gabriel Agreste” and “Good Job On Staying Alive”
“And I have my wonderful house mates who helped me set up all of this shit so a big shout out to Marinette DC, Luka CS, Nino L, and Alya A for helping me set all of this up, plus our honorary house mates Chloé B, Kagami T and Camron DC who is Marinette's older brother. I will link all of their socials in the description so please show them some love.”
Some guests start to filter in and Adrien sets the camera on a tripod and it turns into a time-lapse of people talking that goes on for about 3 and a half minutes. After the funeral has been going on for a while Adrien stands on his coffee table, taps his glass and starts to speak "I would like to make a toast. I despised my dad, he was a neglectful asshole but he was still my dad. I hate him and he deserved what came to him after the whole hawkmoth thing and I hate him so much, so congratulations to all the people in this room for outliving him and I am sure he hated most of you as well. Thank you, that is all."
Adrien's face appears on the screen, with a pair of thick glasses on and a smile.
“Hi this is editing Adrien and I would just like to say thank you, guys, for watching, and I hope you enjoyed the video. I know it’s coming out a little late but I’m trying my best, so thank you all for watching.” Adrien says and then the video ends on his smiling face.