Chapter Text
Merlin was dressed to his idea of perfection. A red shirt. Different from the blue one he was known for so long by. He bent over to blow out the candles on Guais’s work bench. The flames danced in the smoke as they gave out their final sin before descending into the depts of nothingness.
There was footsteps raging forwards almost into the oak down. Physically into as if a tiny creature of magic that was nothing but the steps of small feet walked up and down the fine oak door. Merlin knew it could be any patrolling knights so he didn’t look up. He only did so when the door was opened and his friend the lady Morgana came through.
Merlin earlier in the day asked Gwen if there was anything he could do to help while bringing flowers he had picked himself to Morgana. She was a mess. Even Gwen said she was scared to leave the king’s ward on her own. The candle, the blown out window, the thought it wasn’t just a storm, was cutting into Morgana and she couldn’t take that physical pain that came from her thoughts any longer.
“Is Guais here?” Her voice was urgent and there was tears in her eyes.
“Uh no, he should be back soon though,” Merlin replied hastily.
“Where is he? I need to speak with him,” New tears began to form as the urgency in her voice increased.
“He’s gone to see the king, what’s wrong?” The thought of that tyrant made Morgana look down at the stone floor in fear. She knew it wasn’t just a storm but what if the king found out?
“Hmm,” Morgana began to speak but found her voice was being strangled by fear. She looked off at one of Guais’s potions.
Merlin took this as his opportunity, “You can trust me Morgana, you know you can,” He gave a weak smile with this. As he spoke he could almost hear the great dragon’s voice saying something to him in the back of his head, ‘trust is a double edged sword,’ He knew the dragon could speak to him like this but most of the time kilgharrah didn’t care enough to.
“I’m scared,” Her voice was shaking, “I don’t understand anything anymore. I need to know what’s happening…” Merlin gulped. “Please..” Morgana continued in that low shaky voice.
“Guais will be back soon. He’ll be able to help you,” Now Merlin’s thought’s were conflicted. Help her and ignore his warnings about her from both Guais and Kilgharrah? Or don’t and leave her on her own struggling like he struggled because he went through the exact same thing?
“He won’t,” She shook her head, “I don’t want any more remedies! They won’t do any good!” She took a step forward and took a deep breath to steady herself for what she was about to say, “….It’s Magic Merlin..”
His face lifted as he met her eyes and pretended to be confused, “What?”
“I’m you’re friend you know I wouldn’t make this up.”
“Of course.” He tried to come up with the solution, tell her he has magic then she wouldn’t feel so alone and wouldn’t try what he did to end his fear and confusion…. Or don’t and let her make her own mistakes. Let her try to do what he did… Let her be so alone and confused.
“Then you believe me? You think it’s magic too don’t you?” She smiled as tears formed in his eyes. “Please Merlin I just need to hear someone say it so I don’t have to keep feeling like I’m imagining it!” He nodded as he remembered those days himself.
At last he found his voice after the undead silence had passed through them, “I really wished there was something I could say,” She backed up tears falling as she shook her head.
He remembered that day, he was feeling that exact same but he thought he found a way out, he survived and found out just how beautiful magic was how it wasn’t a curse and it made Merlin: Merlin. He could see himself in Morgana’s eyes those scared eyes. He couldn’t let it end like this. But how could he tell her? Then he would be at risk himself. No.. Not that truth. But he couldn’t let her be on her own.
“Morgana! Wait! I…” She turned around at the door, “I have something I say to you.”
Just enough of the truth.