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“Do you have enough food there?” Felix joked as he watched Minho stack up packets of crisps and sweets on top of a bowl of popcorn threatening to spill.
“Look, if it’s a movie night, we aren’t just going to watch one movie, what’s the point in that?” Minho explained as he struggled to pick up the pack of drinks in his other hand.
“Clearly not with the amount of snacks you’re carrying, good thing we have a day off tomorrow, don’t make too much noise there are other people living in this dorm remember” Felix chuckled as he grabbed his own drink and snack before making his way to his room, probably to spend the night gaming.
Minho raised an eyebrow at the comment, sure the pair did get loud and noisy when commenting on the film and how stupid the characters were but he didn’t think they were that loud that the other members could hear them.
Slowly but surely Minho made his way back to his room where Jisung had already made himself at home like usual. He was lying on the bed, a blanket covering him, his phone plugged into the charger and laptop set up so they could play movies from it.
“Comfy?” Minho asked, making Jisung look up, quickly reacting to help Minho put down the food before the popcorn spilt everywhere.
“Very comfy, your bed is so much nicer than mine, more space, and you’ve actually decorated your room, I’ve done the bare minimum.” Jisung sat up to give Minho room to sit down and get comfortable, grabbing some of the blankets to cover himself as well as propping up the pillows.
“Yeah, I can tell, considering you spend most nights here Hannie” Minho chuckled as he pulled the laptop toward them, netflix was already on the home screen. Minho laid back slightly and Jisung made quick work to lay his head on his boyfriend’s chest.
“Any movies you wanna watch?” Minho asked as he saw Jisung scroll through the different lists, his fingers lingering just slightly on the Studio Ghibli playlist.
“Nope, we agreed to no Ghibli films tonight.” Minho playfully tutted as he grabbed some popcorn and shoved it in his mouth as he watched Jisung hesitantly move past it.
“But we always watch at least one” Jisung pouted as he scrolled down to another set of films.
“Later on Jagi.” Minho ruffled the boy’s hair which was right in front of him.
Han continued to scroll past the films, looking at horror, sci-fi, fantasy, documentaries and cartoons.
“Just close your eyes and pick randomly,” Minho shrugged.
Jisung did so and Minho watched as the cursor landed on a newly released film that had just hit netflix.
“Ohh lets go with that!” Jisung smiled and immediately clicked play, already knowing that Minho knew what the storyline was about after sending it to Jisung just weeks before, ranting about how he couldn’t wait for it to hit the streaming service.
Minho hummed and allowed Jisung to shift again, his head remaining on his boyfriend’s chest, his legs lightly tangled with the elder, whilst he linked their hands together. It was a well-known practice at this rate, both boys were familiar with this situation Minho’s legs going numb where Jisung basically demanded to put all his weight on the boy, whilst they cuddled up and watched an endless amount of films or series until one or both of them fell asleep.
—
They were starting their third movie for the evening, — Harry Potter— because god-forbid they have a movie night without Harry Potter or a Studio Ghibli film. Their positions now slightly changed. Jisung had shuffled up towards Minho so he could comment on the films, without the boy struggling to hear what was being said under Jisung’s muffled tone.
“You remember these right? The Dementors?” Jisung jokes, after Minho went on vlive to speak to Stays and embarrassingly forgot half the characters names, Jisung made it his mission to always tease the older about characters from then on.
“Ha ha” Minho rolled his eyes, the arm that was snugly wrapped around Jisung’s waist pulled him closer.
Minho loved skinship. Well, if you were Han Jisung that is. Minho wasn’t a fan of physical touch — he always felt like if someone initiated it, they’d want more from him. They’d want it to lead to something more. When the pair started dating, Minho had been very self-conscious of physical touch, especially with Jisung — being the bug he was, he always wanted to be touching some part of Minho. Whether it was a light touch on the shoulder, or their legs just slightly closing distance between them whilst sitting besides each other, Jisung loved it all.
Himself and Felix loved cuddles, hugs and anything to do with skinship, — Minho had a hard time coming to terms with this fact at first. Jisung respected his boundaries, not touching him, or at least very minimally. The boy gave his older boyfriend the space and time for him to make the first steps himself. Just like trying to stroke a cat for the first time. Putting out the bait of a few fingers, letting them sniff you before they ultimately decide they want head scratches or they retreat away. Minho was exactly that.
Over time, Minho became akin to Jisung, and Sung usually allowed him to initiate their cuddling sessions first. It allowed him to feel comfortable, and Jisung knew that. Kissing had only really past the boundary of lasting for longer than a few minutes.
“I wish I was a wizard” Jisung mumbled, his voice right beside Minho's ear. The warm breath reached his cheek.
“You wished you were a Jellyfish just last night” Minho chuckled as he watched Harry and Cedric chase after the golden ball thing — the name was on the tip of his tongue.
“Let a man dream Min.” Jisung whined lightly, his head moving around slightly, bashing slightly to the side of Minho’s own head as Jisung peered across to his boyfriend.
“Go to sleep then.” Minho dead-panned and glanced at Jisung who was only a few centimetres away. He hadn’t realised Jisung had moved so close to him.
Minho saw Jisung lick his lips unconsciously, already knowing where this would lead to. Minho knew the signs:
1- Jisung would become whiny, and get close to Minho.
2- Jisung would look at Minho and lick his lips.
3- Jisung would surge forw-
Minho felt Jisung’s lips touch his own before he could remember the next steps in Jisung’s thought out movements. The hand on Jisung’s waist travelling down to the boy’s butt.
Minho didn’t know why Jisung loved it when he touched his butt. But the movement got a quick reaction out of the boy, a small gasp, nothing more.
All Minho knew was it was fun to play pranks on Jisung and smack it whenever he saw an opportunity, even Stays had noticed and made compilations about it. Minho was determined to get the compilations to be at least 5 minutes long.
“Mmm baby” Jisung groaned lightly, his hand going up to Minho’s hip, before he lifted himself onto the older completely. Minho let the boy play with his long locks, he had demanded the boy keep them, but unfortunately Minho already had a hair appointment booked in a couple of weeks to get it trimmed back.
Minho let Jisung take control as always, his tongue darting into Minho’s mouth was slightly unpleasant, but he had grown used to it at this point, poking around for something. The saliva and noises definitely were off putting in the overall experience of making out but that was normal right?
Jisung pulled himself further up, his hand’s trailing from Minho’s hair down to his shirt where he playfully lifted the shirt in an attempt to get Minho to remove it.
Nope, no,no no. This was uncharted territory. Minho felt himself freeze up slightly as Jisung’s hand trailed over his lightly toned stomach.
“N-no Sungie” Minho pulled away. Jisung was quick to remove his arm.
“What’s wrong baby?” Jisung asked concern immediately visible on his face despite the darkness of the room. Minho felt as the boy fixed his shirt to sit over his body correctly again.
“Not yet please” Minho let out in such a small whisper he was surprised Jisung heard it.
“Yeah, yeah that's okay, don't push yourself Min.” Jisung said calmly, his hand going up to stroke Minho’s cheek gently. Before kissing his forehead softly.
“Lets get back to the film yeah? I reckon they’ve already got to the time turner now if you even remember what that is.” Jisung chuckled as he pulled himself off Minho, laying down, Minho knew this was an invitation. The older boy twisted his whole body around and let himself collapse onto Jisung. His arm going around Sung’s stomach his head in the crook of Jisung’s neck.
“Sorry” Minho whispered again.
He felt so bad, Jisung clearly wanted to go further, take it all the way. But Minho couldn’t. He didn’t even know why. He was attracted to Jisung. The boy was incredibly pretty and Minho would happily cuddle him till the end of time. But sex? No not yet… well.. maybe not ever, but surely he’ll want it soon right? Everyone does.
Minho stopped the tears before they could fall, and let himself drift off to sleep, listening to Jisung chatter on and on about whatever was happening in the film.
——————-
Minho sighed as the car pulled up to yet another music station. Sure, having comebacks were great and Minho loved performing in front of Stays and gaining energy from them, but it was so mentally exhausting that just the thought of sitting in a green room for hours on end was not at all appealing.
He hoped he could hide away from the talker cameras as much as possible, he wasn’t in the mood to put up a smile and pretend to be excited about being there, when in reality all he wanted was to be curled up in bed watching a movie, with Jisung next to him. Preferably back in Gimpo so he could be surrounded by his cats.
“Come on Minho” Chan called as Minho slowly gathered his items.
Minho could already see some flashes of the cameras despite it being only around four in the morning. His first thought was to quickly exit the car and ensure his boyfriend was okay. He knew Jisung would not be enjoying the flashes this early in the morning when he had only just woken up an hour ago.
Quickly bee-lining towards Jisung, the group made their way into the building quickly following the familiar route up towards their green room which had been decorated by the staff. The doorway was decorated with different inflatable screws and hammers attached around the outside. Heading inside it was their average greenroom nothing interesting, but Minho was quick to claim his spot in the corner before anyone else could. Chucking his bag down on the ground and getting comfortable immediately.
“Four in the morning is not for me” Jisung let out a tiny whine as he sat beside Minho, immediately collapsing against his hyung to fall back asleep.
Without questioning it, Minho shifted himself so his back was against the armrest, so he could stretch his legs out and let Jisung lay slightly on top of him so his chest was used as a pillow.
“Go to sleep Ji, we won’t be needing to move for at least two hours before our rehearsal, I heard manager-nim saying so to Chan.”
Jisung gave out a hum and easily let himself curl up on his boyfriend, who had procured a blanket from thin air and draped it over the two of them. Minho grabbed his headphones and plugged one into Jisung’s ear and one into his own before turning on one of their joint playlists, which they usually play in the evenings when just cuddling. Luckily most of the other members weren’t making too much noise, most of them opting to also catch up on some more sleep. Chan already setting up his laptop to work on some songs whilst having some peace and quiet before chaos would ensure after the rehearsal.
- - - - -
“Right, that’s perfect thank you, guys, for the rehearsal, please make sure to drop your mics back in the right place ready for when we are preparing for the live stage” Stray Kids manager clapped his hands together and the group all slowly made their way back to the green room.
Two stylists immediately called over the two youngest members for them to start working on their hair and makeup. It seemed like they were going in age order so Minho settled back down on the sofa where Felix was talking to the camera.
“I haven’t seen my outfit yet, but I’m excited, Maniac has a lot of different concepts so I’m not sure what to expect! I reckon something similar to My Pace.” Felix chatted to the screen as Minho slipped in beside him poking his head onto the screen.
“Ahhhhhh” Minho raised his voice.
“Hyunggg why” Felix winced slightly at the loud noise directly in his ear.
“I’m saying hi to Stay? Do you not want me to say hi to our fans, Yongbok?” Minho added as he tilted his head, raising an eyebrow.
“You can, but not by shouting it in my ear” Felix whined as he let Minho take hold of the camera as he heard his name get called for makeup along with Jisung.
“Stayyy, have you eaten? Should I send a picture on Bubble?” Minho moved the camera back and forth towards his eye before pulling up his phone and opening the bubble app.
He selected the camera option and took a photo of the lens making sure he wasn’t exposing anything in the background. After snapping the picture Minho quickly sent it with a small text saying ‘talker-si’.
He spoke for a bit longer, ranting about a few things the members are doing, pointing the camera towards Jeongin who seemed to be falling asleep whilst his hair was being adjusted.
“Minho you’re up!” His manager called to grab his attention so he could get his hair and make-up done.
Waving goodbye to the camera Minho quickly stopped it and headed over to his usual stylist.
“Minho-ssi, how are you?”
“I’m good, can’t wait to see what you have planned for me today!” Minho grinned as he got himself comfortable in the chair, phone ready to keep him distracted.
“Well, how about a perm? Your hair has been getting longer and so it will look good” the stylist announced as she started brushing out his purple locks.
“Sounds good” Minho gave a smile before setting his attention on his phone, deciding to finally respond to some of his messages and also bug Stay on bubble once more.
He was used to the process of hair and makeup, sitting there for at least thirty minutes, and then not being able to sit comfortably on the seats afterwards so that his hair didn’t get messy or he didn’t accidentally smudge his makeup.
—
“Right, we need you in your outfits now, we have about 45 minutes before it’s your turn, grab your clothes, get changed and then go and get your hair fixed up and clothes adjusted if needed” Their manager announced to the group who were all messing around after eating their brunch.
Minho trudged over to the rack of clothes and found his delegated section of clothes, without much thought he picked them up and headed over to the changing rooms.
It seemed to be a fairly straight forward outfit. A black top and the usual leather pants. The top has lilac accents clearly to fit with his hair colour. He’d left his boots outside as he didn’t need them on until the very last moment.
Minho made quick work putting on the pants - well, as quick as you can considering it was leather- and slipped on a pair of comfy socks.
He slipped off his hoodie and shirt and reached for the newer shirt. At first it was going well, completely fine. A nice normal outfit, nothing too drastic.
The shirt was a problem. As Minho slipped it on he noticed the shirt was slightly shorter than he’d usually have it but luckily with the belt he was given the shirt would stay tucked in and he wouldn’t have to worry about showing much skin.
Reaching up to grab his own clothes off the hook on the back of the door his shirt came untucked.
Not a problem, he just had to tuck it back in.
Minho let out a small sigh but shook off any bad thoughts and re-adjusted his shirt, he clearly hadn’t tucked it tightly.
Leaning down to grab his old shoes and stretching back upwards, the shirt fell loose again.
“What’s so hard about staying tucked in” Minho muttered as he tightened his belt one more loop. Giving a stretch upwards and a slight twist to make sure it was staying in, Minho huffed when the shirt ultimately came untucked again.
“Dammit…” Minho as he returned the shirt to its rightful place before he attempted to do a few of the more twisty movements in the choreo. Untucked.
“No, no no no no” Minho felt his breathing change slightly.
This was not good, he didn’t want his shirt to come untucked, and he didn’t want Stay to see his stomach — it was unnecessary, he wasn’t trying to be sexy and show off his abs, no matter how formed they were. He also did not want Stay to see his scar. The stylists knew this.
Which meant there must be a way for the shirt to stay tucked in.
A couple of knocks banged on the door before Chan’s voice called through “Hey Minho you good?”
“Uh, yeah all good, just adjusting some stuff” Minho called back trying to keep his voice steady.
“Okay, we need to go up soon so hurry up” Chan called back, Minho heard his footsteps recede.
Sitting on the bench provided in the room, the dancer let out a deep breath, there must be a way to tuck in his shirt, he couldn’t just go out and ask the stylists cause they’d probably think he was being stupid and that would be beyond embarrassing.
Hitting his head with his hand trying to think of ways to somehow keep his shirt still. If there were no way for the shirt to stay still he’d need a new outfit.
“Min? You good?” Jisung’s voice was heard on the other side of the door, “you need to get your mic on”
“Hmm okay” Minho let out a strangled call, not even realising he’d started to cry slightly.
“Min, you're not okay, let me in, please? What’s wrong?” Jisung’s voice was clearly laced with concern, there was no way Minho would’ve been able to hide his voice from his boyfriend.
Shuffling over to the door, Minho unlocked it and let it click open, peering out slightly as he saw Jisung waiting, picking at his fingers. The boy looked up at the movement and let out a small gasp, “Baby what’s wrong?”
At those small words, Minho nearly broke, his lip quivering slightly as Jisung pushed himself into the changing room and locked the door behind him.
“Th-the stupid shirt” Minho pulled at his hair before tugging at his own shirt again.
“What’s wrong with the shirt Min? It looks fine.” Jisung tilted his head slightly confused at Minho’s distress.
“I- the-the shirt, it won’t stay- won’t stay tucked” Minho moved his arms around motioning to the shirt and the belt which he had roughly unclipped moment’s before.
“Calm down, we can sort this out, everything will be okay.” Jisung grabbed his boyfriend’s hands and placed them against his chest so the boy could feel his steady heartbeat.
“Take a few deep breaths for me, you can borrow my white shirt, I’ll be fine without it on, and it will fit you just fine,” Jisung explained to the boy, watching closely as Minho shut his eyes and focused on breathing and calming his body down.
After a few moments, Minho had clearly calmed down and opened his eyes, letting a deep breath out as he did so.
“You feeling okay?”
Minho shook his head lightly as Jisung let go of his hands and began to quickly start taking off his top.
“We don’t have time, quickly take your shirt off and you can slip mine on” Jisung explained as he unbuttoned his top layer easily.
“ O-okay” Minho mumbled slightly as he turned away from Jisung and unbuttoned his own black shirt.
Jisung was quick to take off his white undershirt and passed it over to his boyfriend who was facing away from him, likely embarrassed about the whole situation. Jisung slipped his top shirt on as he watched Minho slide the white shirt over his head, tucking it into his leather pants before grabbing his black top and putting that back on.
“Better?” Jisung asked as he watched Minho turn with a small smile on his face clearly relieved.
“Better thank you baby” Minho let out a small smile and gave Jisung a quick peck on the lips before dashing out of the room to get his boots and his mic.
Jisung followed behind, making sure to pick up his boyfriend's clothes and shoes to drop off with a stylist so they can hang them up on the rack ready for them to get changed into afterwards.
“Come on you guys, now is not the time to be messing around in the changing room.” Chan rolled his eyes as he pointedly looked at how Jisung wasn’t wearing his white shirt anymore.
“Yah, it’s not what you think, get your mind out of the gutter Hyung” Jisung shook his head as he followed his two hyungs out of the room, the other members already making their way up to the stage.
——————
“Lets play Fuck,Marry, Avoid” Felix grinned as he grabbed one of the beer bottles that were on the side.
Promotions had finally finished and after getting three win’s for their newest comeback, and debuting at the top of Billboard again. Stray Kids knew they needed to celebrate.
“Oooo that’s a good game! But are we doing a mix of genders? Like do you want a mix or just all females or just all males?” Jeongin grinned as he turned to Felix who was taking a long chug of his drink.
“I think we can do it to everyone’s preference. Lix will probably be happy with both, Seungmin I believe wouldn’t mind either and so on.” Chan nodded towards the two members who were Bi and Pan.
“I’m fine with that” Seungmin shrugged as he grabbed a couple of crisps to snack on.
“Whose going first?” Jisung spoke up from where he was sat beside Minho. The older boy rested his head on Jisung’s shoulder, tired from the last few days of non-stop scheduling.
“Changbinnie let’s go” Minho pointed towards the black-haired boy who was lounging on a beanbag.
“Ok Hyung, Chris Evans, Chris Pratt, or Christopher Eccelston,” Felix asked as he searched up a few celebs.
“Whose the last dude?” Changbin asked as he reached to grab his drink.
“One of the doctors from Doctor Who, educate yourself” Jisung tutted lightly and shook his head, accidentally knocking against Minho’s own head. He gave the older a light tap on his hair as an apology.
“Ahh okay.” Changbin seemed to think for just a moment, “Chris Evans I need in bed with me right this moment, Chris Pratt, I see the appeal, butttt I’ll just marry him, sorry Eccelston guy, I don’t know you”
“Yesss Chris Evans is so attractive?!” Felix whined loudly, “that man’s proportions are next level”
“I’m on the next level..” Minho sang softly as he listened to Hyunjin commenting as well at how perky his ass was in his captain America outfit?
All Minho remembered in that film was there was a lot of fighting, and too many inside quotes and plot lines that linked with other films in the franchise that he couldn’t really keep up. Sure he loved the Marvel Universe but it was a bit complicated at times.
“Well is he your Celeb Crush then?” Jeongin pitched in to the conversation that was still somehow revolving around Chris Evans.
“Hmm I mean he’s hot sure, don’t get me wrong if I could have my way with him I’d definitely fuck him. BUT celeb crush? Zac Efron. Have you seen him?! He’s so attractive.” Hyunjin began going on a small rant about how Zac was supposedly the best celeb crush he had ever had.
“You actually wanna have sex with him?” Minho asked quietly, not really directing the question to anyone. Even though he knew Jisung could hear him.
He felt Jisung shift his weight and the boy twisted around so he could lay down slightly, also meaning Minho could lay down besides the boy as the game finally continued, this time Chan answering for Changbin.
“Most people do usually wanna have sex with their celeb crushes Min” Jisung commented quietly in response to the rhetorical question Minho had asked himself.
“It’s a bit weird, but they’re attractive, so of course we feel that way about most of them. But let’s be real, Zac Efron definitely doesn’t turn me on” Jisung lightly continued.
“I mean…sure he’s attractive I guess? He has got nice hair? Like it suits him really well with the tattoos.” Minho shrugged, not really understanding how his hair of all things could even turn someone on. Really? Hair?
“Well don’t worry baby, you turn me on enough, I don’t need any other celeb when I have my own celeb right here.”
Minho felt his stomach drop. Oh no.
——————
Minho let out a tired sigh as he rubbed his eyes as he waited for the dorm door to click open. He’d just had a long dance practice with one of his instructors in preparation for his MC performance with the other MCs and he wanted to get the choreography down within the first day or so. It was only roughly learnt but it was fairly hard. He just had definitely pushed himself way too much, his whole body ached from him clearly not stretching as well as he could’ve.
At the sound of the click, Minho pushed open the dorm to the 3racha dorm, and Hyunjin’s dorm, but the boy hardly spent time there claiming it smelt too much of sweat and too nosy for him to concentrate on his art.
Kicking off his shoes, Minho made an immediate stop to the kitchen to grab some water to cool him down from the trek there. After quickly appreciating the ice cold water, he headed over to Jisung’s room which was clearly occupied.
Even from a few metres away Minho could hear the loud music blasting out of the room.
Giving a knock Minho hesitated outside, Sung probably wouldn’t have heard him if the music was that loud, probably working on some writing. The loud music helped him zone into his own music.
Pushing down the handle Minho gave the door a small push and he walked into the room.
“Hey bab-” Minho began to say but quickly stopped in his tracks.
He was not expecting to see Jisung fully naked on the bed. Watching something very explicit on his laptop. Hand wrapped around his dick as he whined Minho’s name loudly.
There was a loud scream that Minho didn’t realise was his own until he noticed Jisung still in his movements and quickly turned to look at the boy.
“Jesus Christ Min, Oh my god” Jisung quickly paused the video and grabbed the nearest blanket to cover his previous activities.
Minho wasted no time in rushing out the room.
Oh no, Jisung…. Jisung was getting off to porn, but was moaning his name…
Jisung wanted him.
Jisung wanted Sex.
Jisung wanted sex with him.
Minho’s thoughts were blurred and clashing all together as he attempted to quickly pull his shoes back on as he tried to calm his breathing and wipe the tears that were falling.
“Hey baby, Minho Hyung wait” Jisung called to Minho. He was rushing forward towards the boy, now wearing joggers and a hoodie- Minho’s hoodie.
Minho tried to ignore the call and attempted to open the door.
“Hey hey, Minho stop, you need to calm down.” Jisung’s voice was closer than Minho had realised.
His breathing was so heavy he couldn’t hear anything clearly,Jisung continued to talk but it was all muffled,he felt like he was drowning. Shutting his eyes Minho tried to imagine pure black to erase what he had just seen.
He felt Jisung pull him into a tight hug, rubbing his back.
“Hey, don’t worry Minho, just calm down. Can you take a few deep breaths for me baby?”
Minho didn’t register the nod he gave and focused on calming down his breathing, listening to the slightly fastened heartbeat coming from Jisung’s chest, only reminding him of what he had just seen.
Jisung. Jisung was getting off to the thought of him.
He felt sick.
“That’s it Minnie, take a few more for me?” Jisung’s voice was clearer now.
Minho managed to lift up his arms and pulled himself closer to Jisung. He felt the younger,lift him up, his legs finding perches around the boy’s waist, clearly carrying him to his room.
“Sorry, I-I knocked” Minho mumbled into Sung’s neck as he heard some movement around him, one of the hands holding his back coming off, clearly moving away the laptop that was previously being used. The music had also been turned off.
“Woah, you don’t need to apologise Hyung, I clearly just didn’t hear you knocking, and I should’ve locked my door honestly” Jisung bashfully chuckled as he set Minho down onto the bed, giving his face a look over it was slightly red, his eyes starting to puff lightly.
“Do you want some water? I can’t imagine that was the best thing for you to walk into, especially unexpected” Jisung didn’t wait for a response and grabbed a small bottle of water out of the mini-fridge he had in his room. He settled down beside Minho resting his back against the wall.
“I- um- no not really” Minho muttered as he let the boy wrap him up in a few blankets.
There was a silence between them as Minho took a few sips of the water to steady his voice scared of what he’d sound like.
“Do you do it often?” It was barely a whisper, a small crack in his voice betraying him trying to act calm to some degree.
“Masturbate?” Jisung turned to Minho, the older boy nodded, avoiding eye contact. This was plain awkward.
“I mean, it depends, sometimes I need to get rid of any pent up energy I have going on? But most of the time there isn’t any space or freedom to do it. Schedules are crazy, and then I’m usually with you so I wait until I know I’m going to be alone. Today I guess I lost track of time.” Jisung explained.
“Oh” Minho bit his tongue.
Jisung clearly wanted to take the next few steps with Minho, that much was clear, from the other week when he had tried to go further by taking off the older’s shirt, and explicitly stating that Minho turned him on. A big red alarm started blaring in Minho’s head.
He didn’t want that, he didn’t even have any interest in going further. Cuddles and a few kisses were nice, perfect.
“You wanna have sex with me right?” Minho blurted out the question before he could hold back his own tongue.
Jisung shuffled beside him, his fingers finding Minho’s smaller hand and entwining them, giving them a light squeeze.
“Ok, let me finish saying everything I say before you bolt away?” Jisung looked Minho straight in the eyes waiting for confirmation before continuing after getting a quick and sharp nod.
“Of course I do baby, I understand you wanna take it slow, I’m fine with that, in the meantime I can release any crazy hormones whilst I’m on my own. You know I would never pressure you to do anything you weren’t comfortable with.” Jisung explained softly.
“But- Sung, I - Um” Minho started to try and find the right words.
“Don’t push yourself to say anything Minnie, if you aren’t ready to say something then don’t make yourself just for my sake” Jisung wrapped an arm around Minho’s shoulders and pulled the bundled up boy closer to him.
“No- no I wanna say it, but I don’t know how” Minho swallowed.
Jisung stayed quiet, waiting for Minho to find the right words to say. Jisung heard the dorm door open. Changbin and Chan were clearly back from a meeting with one of the producers who wanted to check the lyrics the duo had written for a song.
Jisung heard their voices getting closer before they were right outside his door and knocked lightly.
Minho burrowed himself further into the blankets as Jisung shuffled off the bed and opened the door.
“Hey Sung, you got time to talk about one of the songs you wrote?” Chan asked before peering inside and saw Minho bundled up.
“Ah- um, not really” Jisung scratched behind his ear.
“Minho Hyung is happy to stay,” Changbin shrugged.
“No, it’s not that, we were just talking, halfway through a conversation actually, could we talk about the songs tomorrow? This is kinda important” Jisung motioned lightly to Minho who had grabbed Jisung’s phone and was now scrolling through it.
“Right, yeah of course Sungie, we can talk tomorrow, have a good night yeah?” Chan wasted no time in pulling Changbin away, this was obviously a very private and serious conversation, Chan could tell just from the pair’s facial expression that it was something that needed to be sorted out.
Jisung pushed the door shut and headed back to Minho, pulling another one of his blankets with him.
One can never have too many blankets.
Minho pulled up a documentary on Jisung’s to-watch list.
Jisung knew this was one of Minho’s non-verbal signs to say he’s ready to talk, but only if there’s a distraction so it’s not just the pair of them focused solely on each other. They couldn’t have a serious conversation. That just wasn’t them.
The pair began to watch the documentary about rock climbers and something called ‘free solo’ which was a bit stupid considering the pair were both afraid of heights.
Minho tried to focus on the documentary at hand, trying to follow along with the story they were revealing. But he couldn’t. How could he?
He was about to tell Jisung he didn’t want to have sex with him.
Jisung was probably going to break-up with him.
The boy wants to have sex with him, but for Minho…that territory isn’t appealing.
“I- I don’t wanna have sex” Minho whispered out, as if he said it any louder the whole world would know.
“Okay” Jisung nodded, “that’s fine baby.” Jisung pulled Minho closer, he could feel the boy trembling in his arms.
“Ji, don’t you understand? I don’t want to have sex with you…not now…not ever.” Minho pushed himself up to look at Jisung as they finally made eye contact with each other.
Jisung sighed his eyes shutting momentarily, “I- I had a feeling Min,I was researching it, I thought I was doing something wrong, it was stressing me out thinking that I was trying to push myself on you when you seemed to have no desire to do anything” Jisung began to explain.
“As I was searching it up, It came up with this result, Asexuality it’s called” Jisung paused momentarily, trying to gauge Minho’s emotions.
Minho sat there and listened, not jumping in, “I think you might fall into that category baby. You don’t have any sexual attraction right? You don’t want to have sex with anyone, which could be sex repulsed.” Jisung added on.
“That makes sense…” Minho mumbled, fiddling with Jisung’s hands the documentary completely ignored.
“Sex isn’t appealing to me, it makes me feel sick thinking about it, it scares me.” Minho took a shaky breath. He could feel himself tearing up.
“Sungie, I’ve never felt turned on, I’ve never masturbated, I’ve not done anything. I don’t find the appeal to anything. You want sex, but I can’t give that to you.” Minho let his tears pour out.
Jisung wasted no time in pulling Minho into the tightest hug.
“Baby, you think I wanted to date you because I want to have sex with you? You are thoroughly mistaken, I love you because you are hilarious, you are so gentle and kind- when you want to be- and you care so so much about everyone around you even if you don’t show it. Just because you don’t want sex doesn’t mean I’m going to break up with you. I can survive Minho.” Jisung kissed the top of Minho’s head as he felt the boy cry softly into Jisung’s neck. He could change his hoodie afterwards.
“But I can’t give that to you, I can’t give you something that is an important part of dating, and life and relationships…”
“Whoa, baby, what did I just say?! I don’t care about that, okay, when I first fell in love with you, I didn’t want to have sex with you, I wanted to bundle you up and watch movie’s all day. I wanted to go on cute dates and tease about it on bubble to freak stays out, I wanted to be able to be myself without anyone judging me. Sex is an afterthought when I’m with you, sure there are days when I want it, when I want you. But I can live without sex Minho Hyung, but I can’t live without you.”
Minho listened intently as he calmed down his breathing, his crying turning into sniffles and a few shaky breaths.
Minho went to open his mouth but Jisung quickly covered his mouth with his own hand.
“Nope, no buts, we can discuss boundaries later okay, what things you are comfortable doing and what things you don’t wanna do, and then we can - OW” Jisung quickly moved his hand away from Minho.
“Did you just bite me?!” Jisung let out a sharp gasp.
“I’m not a fan of you sticking your whole freaking tongue in my mouth to be honest” Minho shrugged.
“Okay, I can work with that.” Jisung smiled and kissed the boy lightly.
“Details can come later baby, now let’s change this documentary because I swear to god I do not want to die by getting frightened to death by a documentary.”
Minho let out a hum and quickly changed the documentary to Howl’s Moving Castle.
“Finally, this is now a movie night, I don’t make the rules, you did this to yourself” Jisung wrestled Minho around so they were both lying down side by side as the intro began playing.
It wasn’t long before the couple fell into the usual positions.
“Thank you, I love you Jagi” Minho let out softly.
“Jagi-ya, I love you even more” Jisung pressed a soft kiss on Minho’s fluffy hair.
Minho would be okay, he had Jisung of course he would be.