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Lucy took a breath, smoothing her hands down over her dress. She stepped back and looked in the mirror one last time.
“Nia will understand if you aren’t ready to go,” Maggie had said earlier in the week after watching Leon distractedly pour Alex a cup of milk with a dash of coffee. “There’ll be more events—Lena was throwing money at Nia the second she heard about the Dreamer Center plans, so she’s bound to do a charity event for it in the future. Or we can still go but leave early.”
That had gotten him to stop pacing, to reduce rehearsing the same conversation that yes, you might know of him as Lucy Lane, CatCo’s general counsel, Lois Lane’s sister, or General Lane’s daughter—but that right now he was Leon Lane, and no it wasn’t just a drag thing, and no he wasn’t transitioning to be Leon all the time.
The shift to Lucy this morning had brought some relief.
But as she imagined the conversations with people now, she felt a different sort of discomfort rise up.
“Ready yet?” Maggie called from outside the bedroom, pulling her away from her thoughts. “We’re not in a rush, but Alex has opened the fridge to stare inside it like twice now, and I think she’s going to raid the food table with Kara the minute after we’ve said hi to Nia.”
“I’m just checking what we have,” Alex insisted, followed by the sound of the fridge being shut. Footsteps, and then a knock on the bedroom door. “Can I come in?”
“Sure.”
“I’m being removed from the kitchen. Which, I know, somewhat of a usual occurrence, but—” Alex stopped short, her eyes finally sweeping over Lucy. “Wow.” Her voice slipped into something breathy. “You look absolutely gorgeous.”
Lucy couldn’t help but duck her head against the fluttering in her body, affected by Alex too. It wasn’t an unexpected compliment, not exactly, but the paranoid part of Lucy had been worried that top surgery would change how Alex and Maggie felt about her.
Reassured, she couldn’t help but pull Alex closer and make her blush too: “You should see yourself, Danvers.” Lucy played with the knot of her tie, pulling the tail out from behind her suit just for the fun of it. “I hope you don’t have other plans for tonight, because I know what I’d like to do.”
“You know I don’t have other plans,” Alex grinned, hands settling on Lucy’s waist as she stepped closer. “Just you and Maggie for the rest of the night. Though speaking of things we have to do…” The look in her eyes softened, and one hand came up to cup Lucy’s cheek. “We noticed you’ve been holed up in here for a while. You know that this is one of those things you don’t have to do, right? If you’re uncomfortable, or if you’re just tired of people, or whatever. This isn’t work.”
“I know. I just…” The weird feeling closed over her chest again.
“Is it the dress? I can grab your suit, which you look just as hot in, by the way.”
Lucy smiled, but she shook her head. She was happy to be wearing this dress finally—she hadn’t been able to while recovering from top surgery because the one shoulder design meant that her pocket bras would be visible, and she had to wait to try her adhesive breast forms until her incisions were healed enough. Now it had been a few months, and it felt good, the shape and flow of it against her breasts, and against the rest of her body.
“Thanks for offering,” Lucy said, the sharp edge of her frustration lessening slightly. “The dress is actually fine. I think I’m just uncomfortable with people there seeing only this—” she gestured to herself, “and assuming?”
“Mm.” A look of understanding passed over Alex’s face. “Kind of like when people assume your sexuality based on who they see you with?”
“I… Yeah, actually.” She and James had even gotten shouted at once at Pride—by a group of teenagers who probably didn’t know any better, but it had soured the experience. “That I’ve figured out how to handle, at least. This is…” Lucy let her forehead drop onto Alex’s shoulder.
Alex’s arms wrapped around her. “It’s really bothering you, huh?” she murmured.
Lucy just sighed.
“Would you like permission not to go?”
“I already know I don’t—”
“I know. Hey, I know that you know,” Alex said, rubbing her hand on Lucy’s back, the touch easing the tension that had gathered. “But it’s like what you tell Maggie and I, right? We’re still learning how to not feel so obligated, how to say no to things. And this isn’t life or death.”
“I can’t just…”
Alex kept going. “This is me giving you permission. Okay? You have my permission not to go.”
Lucy squeezed her eyes shut harder. This gentleness still felt like an overwhelming spotlight on the weakest parts of herself, but Alex’s touch never left Lucy, steadying her a little more after each inhale.
“If you’re fine going but you need something from Maggie and I, we can absolutely do that too. But no one will be disappointed in you if you can’t go.”
Lucy breathed into Alex’s shoulder again, and then once more. She finally picked her head up to look at her. “What about you and Maggie? You’ve been excited for this.”
“We can still go and enjoy it for a bit,” Alex reassured. “I know that the three of us can kind of be a package deal, but I promise that Maggie and I will not destroy things if left unsupervised.”
A huff left Lucy’s lungs at the grin and the promise which, if the context were any different, would not be convincing at all. “You two have the worst track records, I swear,” she said, shaking her head.
“But you love us anyway.”
“Somehow I do,” Lucy said, exasperated yet fond. She was stuck with the two of them, but she wouldn’t have it any other way. She hugged Alex again, notching her chin on her shoulder. “And, um, thanks for saying all that. Can we do that?”
“Absolutely.” Alex pressed a kiss to Lucy’s head. “Love you too, Luce.”
--
A couple hours later, Alex and Maggie came back to the apartment, thankfully unscathed and with a plate of food swiped for Lucy.
“We got you this, too.” Maggie pushed a set of jewelry across the kitchen table, the colors of the genderfluid flag and bi flag popping out. “We figured that the necklace would work well with most of your dresses, and there’s pins to put on other things too.”
“So you can be a little more visible when you want to be.” Alex pressed her shoulder against Lucy’s.
Warmth spread through her even as she sputtered. “Oh you didn’t have—”
The look Maggie gave Lucy stifled her protests. Maggie just inched the jewelry further towards her until she finally took them with an amused but genuine smile. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” Maggie rested her elbow on the table and propped her chin up with her hand. “So.” She looked Lucy up and down, the side of her mouth quirking up. Lucy knew what she was thinking—the looks she gave her hadn’t changed. “Did you go anywhere while we were away, or were you just waiting around all dressed up for us?”
“I did some reading. Figured I’d keep the dress on because it’s fun to see Alex’s brain stutter,” Lucy said, smirking back at Maggie.
Alex reached across to shove Maggie’s shoulder. “You were the one rushing us home because you got reminded of Lucy’s dress, and, well.”
Lucy laughed at Maggie’s shrug, no attempt to deny it. “Yeah?” Lucy leaned forward.
Evidently too much though, because her elbow had just touched the table when she felt her left breast form start to slide. One playful shoulder bump by Alex later and it was resting on the table limply.
“Well,” Lucy said finally. “Rough sex with these is off the menu until I figure out how to apply the adhesive better.”
“Oh my god.” The expression on Alex’s face was frozen in shock for a moment before she slapped a hand over her face and let out an embarrassed noise. “I forgot that could happen now. Please don’t tell me I ruined the moment.”
“No, you’re fine. Come here,” Lucy smiled, gently pulling the hand away to kiss her.
“It’s only ruined if we let it be ruined, right?” Maggie was somewhat successfully biting back her own grin. If it was with anyone else, Lucy would have been worried that the laughter was directed at her. But Maggie was amused at Alex’s reaction, and when she met Lucy’s eyes, the mischievous look from before was still there. “We can wait if you want to switch to your bra, unless you want help?”
“I got it.” Lucy took her runaway form from Maggie, the action as comfortable as being passed a binder. “You can help take off my dress after though, if you want.”
“Don’t take too long.” Maggie pulled her in for a kiss of her own, affection and heat that coursed over Lucy’s skin. “Alex and I, we definitely want.”