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Hindsight is twenty-twenty. That’s what people say, anyway, and Tim Bradford has lived enough life to know that’s true. His tendency to carry guilt anytime someone he cared for was hurt ensured that he had a plethora of experiences to draw upon. He never expected today to be added to the list. Then again, years on the force taught him that things could change in the blink of an eye.
+
It started as a normal morning. He was sitting in the roll call room—in his not officially assigned seat—playing a game of poker with Lucy and Angela as they waited for Grey. Their game had gotten interesting, garnering the attention of their friends and other officers who stood by to see would claim victory.
The obvious answer was him, duh . Angela was playing for fun so she was not a real threat to the conditions he and Lucy agreed upon. And there was no way Lucy would beat him. A small part of Tim—an extremely small, practically non-existent part—almost felt bad agreeing to it, but everyone knew he couldn’t pass up a bet. Not when his day was quite literally riding on it.
If she won, she’d get to drive for the rest of the week. If he won, then she was getting saddled with all the paperwork for every call they got for the next 3 shifts.
So that’s how he found himself watching as Lucy held her cards close to her chest, a pile of jelly beans sitting in front of her as she contemplated her next move. After a few seconds of deliberation, she set the cards down and pushed all the jelly beans into the center of the table.
Tim tsked in response, ignoring the little smirk that graced his opponent’s lips. This was going to be easier than he thought.
“Do you think the lady is bluffing?” Angela asked, amused at the entire ordeal.
Confident with his hand, he leaned back in his seat. “I know the lady’s bluffing because she has a tell.”
“No, I don’t.” Lucy replied, eyes narrowing.
He scanned the room to gauge everyone else’s opinions. Harper’s subtle shrug, Nolan’s head tilt, Thorsen’s eyebrow raise, and even Smitty’s look of deep concentration.
“I’m gonna go all in,” he declared, pushing all of his jelly beans into the center with hers.
“Oh, I like it. Live by the sword, die by the sword.” Angela nodded, approving his play. “I call.”
Harper shook her head. “Alright, let’s see ‘em.”
“Three of a kind, king high,” Angela sighed.
Harper hummed, “Perfectly respectable, but not getting it done.”
Tim’s mouth twitched as he revealed his hand. “Pair of kings, pair of sevens—oh, I’m sorry, three sevens.”
“Ooh, a full boat from the sassy Sergeant Bradford,” Harper mused.
He had this win in the bag. Even Harper was impressed. The smirk on his face grew wider as he turned his gaze to what he expected would be Lucy’s defeated pout, only to be met with her pressing her lips together in an attempt to not laugh.
Without further ado, she laid her cards out on the table.
The room erupted into chaos after that.
“Ooh! A straight flush! That has to hurt.” Nyla’s tone clearly indicating her lack of sympathy over his loss.
Aaron grinned as he spoke. “I think that Bradford is speechless.”
Tim tossed a glare over his shoulder at the young rookie, effectively silencing him.
“Guess I’m a better liar than you thought,” Lucy said, looking way too proud of herself. Her eyes gleamed with mirth. “Wait, I’m an amazing liar, I thought we covered that already. Remember?”
He did remember. Vividly. Her fake love confession that paralyzed him to the point that he forgot how to speak in coherent sentences. “I don’t think I’ll ever forget.”
“Hold on, I want to know.” Nolan perked up in his seat.
Angela sat up straighter, eyes flitting between the two of them.“Oh same, I want to know what Lucy did that has you looking two shades paler than you normally do.”
“Alright everyone, settle down. Find your seats. You too, Lopez. This case is falling into your lap,” Sergeant Grey exhaled as he walked into the room, face grim. “I hope you had a restful few days off shift, because we caught a case that will require everyone to be hypervigilant. We’ve got two murders in the last two days with the exact same M.O. The first homicide was two days ago following a hit and run in Eagle Rock.”
Grey pulled up a screen and displayed pictures on the board. “This man in a pickup, rear-ended this woman in a sedan, and then he got out of his car and shot her. Twice in the chest at close range. He then fled the scene. The responding officers thought it was a road rage incident until yesterday. Yesterday’s shift was about to head back when they responded to a second shooting following a violent accident. This time in Mid-City. Similar pattern and the same driver according to eyewitness accounts. This time he’s in the SUV you see on screen. He t-bones the red truck, he survives the crash, and just like before, he gets out, walks right up to the other car and shoots the driver.”
“Were either of the vehicles the suspect used reported stolen?” Angela asked, taking notes of what they knew so far.
“Yes, both the vehicles were reported missing prior to the accidents.”
Tim’s eyes flitted over to Lucy, whose head was tilted in thought as she wondered out loud.“It sounds like a thrill killer.”
“A thrill killer at the start of a spree. With two dead and our primary suspect at large, I need everyone on this. He’s sticking to a pattern which means he’ll kill today. CCTV has been on the news. We got a call about a waitress who thinks she served him last night and a librarian in Silver Lake recognized the shooter. Claims the suspect stole his car and threatened him with a gun. Which means it’s most likely he already has the vehicle he’s going to use. Harper, Thorsen, I want you to find the librarian. Nolan, go speak to the store clerk near the sight of yesterday’s crime scene.
“Like I said before, keep an especially watchful eye for any suspicious activity. Go patrol the streets and if you sense anything out of the ordinary, call for back-up. Let’s find this guy.”
+
The rest of the morning went by quickly. Well, as quickly as it could go with Lucy in the driver's seat.
“Oh, will you stop sulking already? You’re being ridiculous. You should be thanking me for driving. It means that you get to do your paperwork early instead of at the end of shift when all you want to do is go home.” Lucy turned to face him as they rolled up to a red light.
He scoffed, “If you would’ve lost, I wouldn’t have to do paperwork at all.”
“7-Adam-100, we need a supervisor at 4600 Spruce Avenue immediately. Possible hostage and second suspect at the location.”
“7-Adam-100 responding.”
By the time they arrived on scene with SWAT it was too late. The hostage was dead and the real killer was on the loose after coercing the initial suspect, Mark, to commit the crimes by holding his wife hostage.
“Murder by proxy. God, that opens up a slew of possibilities.” Tim ran a hand through his hair as he surveyed the scene once more.
Lucy’s eyebrows furrowed. “But who is pulling the strings? It’s like he’s playing a game. He wanted Mark to suffer.”
Something about the whole thing was unsettling. It wasn’t the first time Tim had witnessed a proxy killing and it most likely would not be his last, but something about this case in particular was gnawing at him. He wanted to get away from this house and back on the streets as soon as possible.
Angela’s arrival on scene was a relief. It meant he could hand it over to the detectives and get back out there. His stomach settled at the thought of getting out of there.
“Chen, let’s go. I’m handing off to Lopez.”
“Yes, sir.”
They hopped back in the shop and were patrolling for barely two hours when the radio cracked to life. .
“7-Adam-100 switch over to channel fifteen.”
“7-Adam-100, copy. This is 7-Adam-100 on channel fifteen.”
“Bradford.” Grey’s voice filtered in through the radio. “We have word of a potential target, Judge Melissa Hamilton. She is not responding, but we are tracking her cell phone and you are the closest unit to her. I’m sending her location to your box.”
Tim reached back down for the radio. “We’re on our way.”
It all went to shit after that.
+
There’s a reason they tell you to follow your gut instinct. Especially when you’re a cop. His gut told him that this whole case was wrong, but when a suspect is armed and holding people hostage, there isn’t any time to do anything other than engage.
That’s how you end up with a judge and a suspect holding a gun to your face.
Tim looked around the jewelry store, trying to find a safe way to either radio for help or free the hostages. Realizing that they had no clear shot or way to approach the suspect without putting their own lives at risk, he signaled for Lucy to lower her weapon. “It’s okay.”
“Put them down on the ground now!” The suspect, Casey, roared. “Melissa, pick them up. Pick up their guns. Toss them!”
The hostage in Casey’s arms, a young woman in her twenties, whimpered as his arm tightened around her neck. “Lock it down! Lock the place down.”
The woman reached over the counter, pressing a button that caused a mental wall to drop down in front of the glass doors, effectively cutting them off from any back-up.
Tim cursed mentally, locking eyes with Lucy as his heart rate picked up in response to their situation. There has to be a way out. There has to be a way to disarm the guy without putting everyone else in danger.
Judge Hamilton cleared her throat, voice trembling as she found it once more. “Please, I did what you wanted. Now, let my daughter go.”
Casey chuckled, “Oh, Melissa. But we haven’t finished playing our game. Secure them.”
Tim stood silent as he was pushed onto the ground into a sitting position beside Lucy, their hands duct-taped. Just as Judge Hamilton was finishing securing him, he looked up at her. “It’s gonna be okay.”
In all honesty, he found that hard to believe, himself. That hope dwindled as the suspect handed the judge a gun and told her to kill the jeweler to save her daughter’s life. The dread that crept up into his bones did nothing to prepare him from the ice cold fear that ran through his body when Lucy spoke up.
“Come on, she’s got nothing to do with this, okay? Just let her go.” She motioned to the blonde woman shaking on the floor as the gun remained trained on the poor girl. “Casey. She’s not a part of this. Okay? You have no reason to hurt her, just let her go.”
For a split second, Tim thought Lucy may have gotten through to Casey. He watched as Casey removed the gun from the girl’s head before crouching down to sit in front of Lucy. Casey tangled his hands in Lucy’s hair and pulled, sending a burning sensation through Tim’s chest as he willed every cell in his body to stay still and not make a sound to avoid provoking the suspect more.
“I wasn’t talking to you.” Casey tugged on her hair one more time before letting go. He grabbed the jeweler by the hair and pushed her into a mirror, shattering it and scattering pieces on the floor.
Tim inched forward, mind automatically telling him to grab one of the shards as a weapon.
“Don’t you dare move.” Casey yelled, training his gun on Tim instead. He turned back to Judge Hamilton and handed her a gun once more. “New deal. Now you kill one of these two.”
Tim’s chest tightened as Judge Hamilton took the firearm in her hand. He needed to get out of his restraints. He had to get Lucy and the hostages to safety.
“Who’s it gonna be?” Casey pushed his gun into the small of Melissa’s back.
The judge sniffled. “Please. I don’t want to do this.”
“Focus, Melissa!”
“Please.”
Casey shook his head. “Judge, you got to decide. That’s what you do, right? Decide life or death with a flick of your gavel.”
“Please.”
When Tim made eye contact with Judge Hamilton again, he did everything he could to keep that gun trained on himself and away from Lucy. Imploring her with his eyes to shoot him instead.
“Shut up! Focus, Melissa. Pull the trigger.” Casey grit out in impatience.
That’s when Lucy sat up straighter. “Casey.”
Tim whipped his head over to Lucy, searching her face for any indication of what she was planning and begging her to sit down and stay quiet. “Luce.”
She ignored him, keeping her attention trained on Casey as she stood to her feet. “Um, if Melissa won’t play, I will. Truth or dare. That’s your game, right? I’ll play.”
Tim wanted to throw up. He couldn’t remember the last time he had puked on the job, but as he sat there frozen on the floor, he knew without a shadow of a doubt that this man could take away everything that matters to him in seconds.
Casey seemed to consider her offer, pacing around looking between Lucy and Judge Hamilton, sizing up his best chance at the game. “Okay. Officer…”
“Chen.”
A sickly smiley appeared on Casey's face. “Officer Chen Truth or dare?”
“Truth,” Lucy replied without hesitation.
Waiting for the suspect to turn his back, Tim scooted over to grab a piece of the broken glass as he tried to free his duct-taped hands.
Casey took a couple steps closer to Lucy. “If I think you're lying or stretching the truth in the slightest, I'll kill him,” he muttered, raising his gun towards Tim, causing Lucy to flinch as she glanced over at him.
Biting her lip, she nodded. Eyes still locked with his own, Tim detected a flash of an apology in hers. The pit in his stomach increased exponentially as he did everything in his power to keep the fear and panic at bay.
“You ever shoot anybody before?”
“Not fatally, but yes, I have.”
“You enjoy it?”
“No.”
“Liar!” Casey growled, firing a shot right next to Tim’s head, narrowly missing him.
Lucy let out a shout, eyes clouding over with fear as she tried to bring Casey’s attention back to her. “No, no, no. I'm not lying. Okay, I'm not lying. The people I shot, I had no choice. But I did not enjoy it. I didn’t. Okay, you asked and I told you the truth. I told you the truth.”
Tim’s heart was hammering in his chest as he continued to work away at the duct-tape with the shard of glass. The only thought in his mind as he did this was to get Lucy as far away from the suspect as possible. He made eye contact with her for a split second, silently signaling her to keep Casey occupied as he tried to free himself.
She took a steadying breath and continued. “So, uh… now it’s my turn. Right? That’s how this game is played. We take turns. Truth or dare?”
“Truth.”
“What’s it gonna take for all of us to walk out of here alive, for this to end peacefully?”
“I ain’t going back to prison,” Casey spat, raising his gun to Lucy’s face. “My turn. Truth.”
“Truth.”
“I want you to say something you’re afraid to say. That you’d never tell anybody. And you better make it good, 'cause if it's not, it's gonna be the last thing you ever say.”
Tim watched as Lucy nodded her head, racking her brain for anything that could appease Casey’s mad request.
“So what's it gonna be, Officer?”
“There are only four people I trust in this world...”
“Boring.” Casey scoffed, shooting a bullet into the judge’s leg, causing Tim to flinch. “Next!”
Tim sat as still as he could waiting for Lucy to distract the suspect so he could continue working away at his restraints. The pit in his stomach had grown deeper, as if his body knew something his mind had not caught up to yet, the dread increasing by the minute.
Lucy swallowed, a soft sound leaving her lips. “Um… when I was kidnapped… mmhm… I sang in the barrel to soothe myself.”
“Wrong!” Casey roared. “Come on, you can do better than that.”
“Casey.” Tim spoke, praying he could shift the attention back on himself.
“Shut up!”
That only seemed to anger the man even more, as he reached forward and grabbed Lucy by the arm, dragging down onto her knees.
“Okay, okay, okay.” Lucy said, trying to reign Casey back in.
“Last chance. Something you would never say aloud, not even to your partner here. Your deepest, darkest secret. Impress me or I kill him. Come on!”
Tim worked even faster to free himself, caring little about the gashes he was surely leaving on his hand as the glass bit into his fingers and palm.
“Tim, um…” Lucy caught his gaze, eyes glassy with genuine tears and what seemed like an apology. Her voice cracked with emotion as she pushed on. “I’ve always loved you. My last day as a rookie when I tricked you in the shop, I wasn’t lying. I panicked after you didn’t react so I took it back. I was just too scared to say it before and let it be real. And now things are just really too complicated to say it now. You’re my Sergeant, I’m your aid. You’re with Ashley… I'm sorry. But you should know.”
The truth hit him like a ton of bricks. It was messy and heartbreaking, but hopeful all at the same time. By now the tears were running down her cheeks and it was taking everything within Tim not to surge forward and wrap her in his arms, telling her that everything was going to be fine. Instead, he focused on the task at hand, knowing that he was seconds away from having his hands free.
“Hot damn.” Casey chuckled, pointing his weapon at Lucy. “That's what I'm talking about. Now those are some last words right there. But not good enough to save your life.”
Casey crumpled to the ground as Tim fired a round from his back-up piece.
When his eyes found Lucy’s he let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. She was safe. He did it. They were safe.
He reached for her, cutting through the duct-tape that bound her wrists, before he pulled her into a crushing hug. They stood there for a minute, her small frame shook against him as he whispered into her hair. “I’ve got you. I’ve got you.”
The moment was interrupted as the calvary burst into the jewelry store. Tim and Lucy jumped away from each other, the air becoming tense around them.
He shook his head and launched into action, trying to put as much distance between the two of them. “We need multiple RA units. We’ve got 3 down, 3 gunshot wounds.”
“Hang in there Melissa, help is on the way,” Lucy crouched down text to the judge, expression unreadable.
By the time they were outside and EMTs were wrapping his hand in gauze, he felt the chasm between them widen even more. She stood beside Grey, giving him her statement. The desire to shove the EMT aside and interrupt them was growing stronger every second. However, he didn’t think assaulting a first responder would look very good on his record. So instead, he resigned himself to catching her gaze. They’d always had this uncanny ability to communicate without words and he was hoping that his face would say it all. But when he made finally eye contact with Lucy, he found himself unable to read her.
And for the second time today, he knew that he was screwed.
+
The ride back to the station was silent and to be frank, uncomfortable. As soon as they arrived, Lucy bolted out of the shop, grabbing their war bags and disappeared.
Word of their hostage situation had made its way around the division, meaning that the walk back to his desk in the bullpen was full of cops attempting to make conversation. With a stern glare, he was able to dodge the majority of questions thrown his way. Sitting down at his desk, he slumped forward, head in his hands as he tried to process all that he’d heard.
Lucy’s confession—whether real or a clever diversion tactic she picked up Nyla while working UC—had brought forward a lot of things he thought he’d buried deep down a long time ago. Now though, they were at the forefront of his mind and it seemed like every nerve in his body was screaming at him to stop being an idiot because he was in love with Lucy.
God, he was in love with Lucy.
Was. Is. Always will be.
Tim wasn’t exactly sure when he started feeling different, but he remembered the day when the thought of no longer having her in his life seemed worse than death. He remembered finding out Caleb had taken her and realizing that there was nothing he wouldn’t do to bring her back home safe. It scared him that day and it still scared him today.
Back then he was in a serious relationship with her friend Rachel, so there was nothing he could do about it in good conscience. Not to mention she was his rookie and fraternizing could have ruined both of their careers. So, that day in the hospital he pushed it down and locked it away, ignoring the voice in his head that seemed hell bent on reminding him that these feelings were different than anything he’d ever felt before.
He rubbed his fingers against his temples, feeling a headache coming on. This day had not turned out like he’d expected and it wasn’t even over yet. There were reports to finish and three hours left on shift.
“Bradford.”
Tim looked up to see Sergeant Grey standing in the doorway of his office, motioning for him to come over. Walking in and closing the door behind him, Tim sat down in front of Grey’s desk. “You wanted to see me, sir?”
“I wanted to check on you, see if you’re okay. You seem… worried, stressed.”
“I’ll be fine, sir. I’ve just got a lot on my mind.”
“Any of it have to do with a certain gofer?” Grey asked, a knowing look on his face.
Tim sighed, “She told me she loved me.”
“Come again?” Grey’s eyes widened.
Tim brought a hand back up to his face, pinching the bridge of his nose to will his headache away. “Casey was playing mind games and waving his gun around. He asked her to share a secret she wouldn’t dare tell anyone, not even me, and she confessed that she’s in love with me.”
“Dammit.”
“Look sir, I know it’s frowned upon and I’m in her chain of command so there’s no way we could ever do anything about it. Besides, I’m with Ashley and I may be a lot of things but I’m not a cheater so–”
“I owe Lopez and Harper twenty bucks each.” Grey crossed his arms over his chest in annoyance. “I really thought you’d be the one to crack first.”
“Wait, what?”
Grey looked back up at Tim in surprise. “What? You think we’re blind or something? Come on Tim, anyone with eyes and half a brain knows that you’re in love with each other. It was only a matter of time.”
“Yeah, except, I only just realized that I’m in love with her a few minutes ago.”
“Seriously?”
“As a heart attack.”
“Listen, son. Your brain might’ve not known, but your heart has known for a while now. It just took you a second to catch up to it.”
“That may be true, but what’s also true is that no matter how we may or may not feel for each other, we can’t be together.”
Grey stared at him in confusion. “Why not?”
“Why not? I don’t know Sarge, maybe because like I mentioned two minutes ago, I’m her superior officer. She might not be my rookie, but she’s my aide and even if she weren’t, she’d still be in my chain of command.”
“And if that wasn’t a problem, would you go for it?”
“That’s not—it doesn’t matter. I’m with Ashley.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
It was a weak excuse. And if he were honest with himself, he knew that choosing to stay with Ashley would only hurt all of them in the long run.
“Today could’ve gone very differently than it did and you know that.” Grey exhaled. “Now, you didn’t hear this from me, but there is some paperwork that could temporarily protect you if you decide to make a go for it with Chen. She couldn’t be your aide anymore, of course, but it would give you some time to figure out if this is serious before making any decision to transfer stations or move to a different department. Word on the street is that Metro’s sergeant has been talking about retirement. And if not, there’s always Court Liaison.”
Tim’s eyebrows shot up to his hairline. “You’re actually okay with this?”
“She’s good for you. Why do you think I paired you together? This may not have been what I meant to do when I connected you and I didn’t know it would go this far, but I’m happy that it did. You’re different when you’re around her.”
“Yeah, she–uh…” Tim cleared his throat, swallowing back some emotion. “She makes me want to be better. Not just for her, but for myself too.”
Grey nodded, a smile on his face.“Well, now knowing all the information, what are you going to do?”
“I’m going to break up with my girlfriend.”
+
Tim didn’t see her again until the end of shift. After his enlightening conversation with Grey, he locked himself in an empty observation room to finish his report and avoid any other questions. He even waited an additional twenty minutes after everyone had left to ensure he wouldn’t run into them on his way out.
Maybe that’s why he was so surprised to find her leaning against his truck.
Crossing the parking garage, he stopped a few feet away from her, stomach churning. “Hey.”
She startled a bit, as if not expecting him. “Hey, um… so I didn’t get a chance to say it back there, but thank you for saving my life… again.”
“Just doing my job.” He felt his stomach settle as a small smile graced her lips. “You okay?”
“Yeah. I will never make fun of you for insisting on having a back-up piece again.”
“Look Tim, what I said back there, I, uh... I needed to say something that would get his attention, and I needed to say something that would get your attention. You know, so, I–uh… just needed to throw him off balance.
“Lucy,” Tim breathed out, taking a step closer. “Truth or dare?”
Lucy narrowed her eyes at him, worrying her lip as she contemplated her reply. “Truth.”
“Did you mean it?”
“I–” her breath caught in her throat. “You’re my best friend, you know that, right? I’m not sure when it happened, but somewhere along the line you’ve become my favorite person. If we do this and it doesn’t work, I’ll have ruined the most important relationship in my life.”
His heart stuttered as took in her words. She was right. There was no more denying what they meant to each other. And a part of him was terrified that he’d screw everything up like he’d done with Isabel. But the louder, more insistent part of him was willing to throw it all to the wind.
He must’ve been quiet for too long because Lucy pushed off of the truck in a move to walk away and started to speak once more.
“So we should just keep going the way we have been, right? It’s not worth the risk.”
“Unless it is.”
“What?”
The next words that came out of his mouth felt effortless. “I’m in love with you, Lucy Chen. And I mean the great big die for you, kill for you kind of love that makes you just a little insane. It’s completely unlike anything I’ve ever felt before and it scares the shit out of me. But you’re worth it, so I’m willing to take any risk as long as I get to do it with you.”
Lucy sucked in a deep breath, eyes shining with vulnerability and disbelief. “You’re telling the truth, right? Because I don’t think I can handle it if you take it back.”
“Lucy,” he said, a smile growing on his face. “I promise you, I’m not gonna take it back. I will never take it back.”
“Okay, okay…” Lucy nodded her head as she paced back and forth.
There was a second where he got worried. Her quick paces felt in sync with the thundering of his heartbeat. Because after all, there was still a chance that even after everything, after they both confessed, she’d still decide to play it safe. It would hurt, sure, but he would understand. And he would never jeopardize their friendship for something as trivial as hurt feelings.
His worries were assuaged with a singular action.
Lucy surging up to kiss him.
If he wasn’t sure before, he was sure now. His heart belonged to the woman before him and he would do anything, give anything, be anything to make sure she knew it.
He didn’t know how long the kiss lasted. It could’ve been seconds or minutes, but it didn’t matter. For the first time in years he was happy and hopeful for the future. When they finally broke for air, Tim couldn’t contain the smile on his face.
“I’m sorry, I–uh, probably shouldn’t have kissed you like that,” Lucy stammered, cheeks flushed.
“Trust me when I tell you that you can kiss me whenever you want.”
He leaned in for another kiss, but was stopped with a hand on his chest.
“Wait! We can’t. You’re with Ashley. If we’re going to do it, we have to do it right.”
“Was.”
“Huh?”
“I was with Ashley,” he said, bringing a hand to cup her face. “I ended it.”
“You ended it?”
“Yes.”
“So… we’re both single.”
He chuckled, “Yes, we’re both single.”
They were both single and on the same page.
“Hey, Luce? Truth or dare?”
She hummed, narrowing her eyes at him. “Dare.”
“Go out on a date with me.”
“Okay.”