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Let it never be said that Clint Barton has good luck. As the freezing cold water rises over his head, he panics. He thrashes about and tries to swim up to the surface, but is both startled, and terrified when he feels the ice above him.
Oh my God. I'm going to die here. I'm going to die and Bucky will never know that I love him. I never told him. And I'm going to die. I never told him and I'm GOING TO DIE.
Clint can't believe this. Of all the things in his shitty life he's lived through, this is how he dies. He's trapped, he's scared, and he's so fucking cold!
He feels his lungs burning with the need to inhale and pounds the ice above him to no avail. He sobs out a cry that bubbles out of his mouth and finally gives in. He takes a deep breath and feels his lungs fill up with ice before the darkness swallows him.
~ * ~
Five days earlier, the Avengers team had been called over to Moscow to investigate an active HYDRA base. Steve was somewhat reluctant to accept the mission, as two valuable members of the team had history there; a history that made them both somewhat unpredictable and on edge. However, both Russians had assured him that there was nothing to worry about, and the team had headed over to Moscow nonetheless.
When Clint had questioned them, Bucky and Natasha had brushed off Clint's concern and had both told him that they were perfectly able to do their job. Clint had believed them and, after a very detailed and disturbing threat --that Clint would rather never repeat-- from Natasha, eventually stopped bugging them both about it.
The team was to infiltrate and destroy a HYDRA base that was thought to have agents inside carrying out gamma radiation experiments on humans. It was an easy mission, really. While Bruce stayed in the Quinjet for backup, Steve and Natasha had gone through the front door to be a distraction for Bucky and Clint, who had snuck through the vents to find the innocents, and set the charges to blow up the base. Tony, Thor and Sam had taken over aerial cover, taking out the heavy artillery, and any HDRA agent who tried to flee.
It had been simple enough to actually find the room the hostages were held in, but Clint had been thankful to have Bucky with him. The Soldier had dispatched all the agents while Clint lead them through the labyrinth of the base.
When the hostages had been found, Clint had been devastated to find no survivors. All the "subjects" had been mutilated and deformed. With a grimace, Bucky had set the charges, and when the team was out and away from the facility, blew the base sky high.
Everyone had been kind of upset after not finding any survivors, especially Clint. Bucky had wanted to do something to make his archer feel better, so he had suggested that the team stay in Moscow for a little while; in the mountains. Since it was January, there was a lot of snow to go skiing. The Avengers hesitantly agreed, and had all gotten rooms in a nearby ski resort.
After a few days everyone had almost forgotten about the horrors in the HYDRA base, but skiing was getting "boring and cold" as Clint had put it.
"I don't want to go skiing everyday, Jimmy," Clint had said. "Isn't there anything else we could do?"
Bucky had smiled at his boyfriend and confirmed that yes, there was somewhere else they could go.
"We can go snowmobiling to an ice hole and fish if you want."
"Are you shitting me?" Clint had sounded weary.
"You said you used to fish with your dad and brother all the time in Iowa. It can't be that different, Clint. Whatta ya say?"
"...I guess."
So all the Avengers had decided to go snowmobiling. Clint and Bucky, however, were the only two who decided to go ice fishing, which was, according to Tony, "so fucking domestic".
As Clint and Bucky had gotten onto their respected snowmobiles, Clint shouted "I'll race you there, Buck!" And with that, had sped off. Bucky had cursed and took off after him.
Clint had been in the lead the entire ride, until Bucky had decided he had had enough of playing around. He had slammed into Clint's back end with a loud shout of triumph, which had sent his archer spinning of course with a cry.
"Nyet, nyet, Soviet!" Clint had laughed as Bucky pulled away.
Clint had tried to get control of his snowmobile but had quickly realized there was no way he would be able to catch up with his favourite Russian (don't tell Nat). So with a smirk, he had decided to try and take a "shortcut" around the trees of the forest, instead of through them as Bucky had.
He had thought it was a good idea, but after a loud crack had sounded from beneath him, he knew he was fucked.
The thin ice had completely cracked and Clint, snowmobile and all, had been plunged into the freezing cold water that he hadn't even known was there.
~ * ~
Bucky laughs to himself as he speeds through the forest. Clint will be so pissed when he catches up to him. With a snicker, Bucky continues to speed through the forest. When he comes out the other side, he stops his snowmobile. Clint should be close enough to hear, yet there is nothing. Not a sound. Bucky feels uneasiness deep down in his gut. What if something happened to him? Everyone knows Clint has horrible luck and can be incredibly clumsy. The idiot probably got lost or something, Bucky thinks with a smile.
But as he stands there, he realizes that he can't just do nothing. If something happens to Clint, he will never forgive himself.
So with a sigh, Bucky mounts his snowmobile again and turns back to go through the forest.
Bucky expects to eventually run into Clint's snowmobile as they are on the same path, but he starts to become increasingly nervous when he realizes he can't even hear it. Where is he?!
As Bucky finally makes it out of the forest, he looks around frantically for any sign of his boyfriend.
He doesn't see any. But what he does see, is a large patch of disrupted snow on the top of the lake next to the forest.
All at once Bucky's body freezes. Panic consumes him and he has to force himself to stop thinking of the worst case scenario. He takes off toward the crack as fast as the snowmobile can take him, and he feels the ice thinning, he gets his ride and runs to the hole in the ice.
With a mantra of "Fuck. Shit. Please be alive", Bucky recognizes the snowmobile tracks leading to the large hole in the ice and there's no doubt in his mind about what had happened here.
He reaches his metal arm into the freezing water --he can't feel the temperature but it's no doubt freezing; this is Russia after all-- and starts feeling around.
"Clint!! Clint!!!" Bucky yells his boyfriend's name, still trying to grasp onto anything that could be his beautiful archer. But he finds nothing. He reaches into his pocket and calls Steve before reaching his arm back into the water, leaning further under this time.
"Hi, Buck! You guys having fun-"
"Steve! Clint's gone. I can't fucking get him!! He's in the lake, holy shit it's all my fault!! Stevie, you gotta get over here! I need-"
"Whoa! Buck, calm down. What are you saying? Where are you?"
"Clint fell into the lake but I can't get him!" Bucky continues speaking in his frantic, desperate voice all the while trying to reach his man. "Please, find us! Help me, Stevie. I can't lose him!"
"Okay, Buck. We'll be there in thirty minutes--"
"THIRTY MINUTES?! Steve, he'll be dead by then!!" Bucky blurts out.
"I'm sorry, It's the best we can do, Bucky. Try and get him. I don't know what else we can do," Steve says sombrely.
Bucky throws his phone away, not even bothering to hang up. As he's reaching further underwater, still with no results, he starts to become more and more frantic.
How long has he been under? He has to be okay. He has to be okay. He has to be okay.
Bucky has cold tears running down his face as he decides to switch tactics. In his desperation, he starts punching holes in the ice around the initial hole, hoping he'll be able to find Clint.
Bucky almost decides to jump into the water himself, when his fingers brush against something solid. His heart jumps into his throat as he grabs at it and pulls it to the surface.
Bucky catches a glimpse of blond hair and his heart soars. He rips the surrounding ice away and yanks Clint's cold, lifeless body onto land. He sobs wetly at the sight of his hawk's face. He is pale, his lips tinted blue because of the freezing water. But what really breaks Bucky's heart is the lack of a pulse that Clint has.
With another sob, he leans over the soaking body of his lover and proceeds to give Clint CPR.
Pumping on Clint's chest proves to be difficult so he rips Clint's jacket wide open and begins chest compressions.
"One. Two. Three. Four. Five..." Bucky murmurs along with his compressions. He can feel tears running down his face at just how pitiful Clint looks. Under his huge metal arm, Clint looks so fragile, like his ribs are going to shatter from the force of the compressions. But Bucky doesn't care, as long as his hawk wakes up.
"C'mon, sweetheart. Open your eyes!" Bucky keeps up with the compressions until he reaches thirty. He then bends down, supporting Clint's head with his flesh hand, and blows two deep breaths into his boyfriend's unresponsive body.
Bucky breathes out shakily and goes back to chest compressions.
"Clint. Breathe! Don't give up now, c'mon darlin', I fucking need you!"
Another thirty done, and two more deep breaths into Clint's mouth. Still no response.
"Clint. I. Love. You. Please. Come. Back. Doll!!" Bucky shouts out with each rough pound he delivers to Clint's chest.
But the archer is still not breathing.
After two more breaths; still not breathing.
But Bucky continues, not going to give up on the love of his life. Even after he does it again and again without any reaction. Even as he thinks he feels the bones grinding against each other under his force.
He starts crying tears of frustration now, and begins pounding on Clint's chest. Hard, forceful punches that rock the young man's frame.
"Fuck. You. Wake. UP!!" Upon his last word, Bucky clenches his hand harder into a fist and brings it down onto Clint's chest with tremendous force.
Clint's body goes rigid as a huge gasp overcomes his body and his eyes shoot open. He immediately starts coughing and tries to flip onto his side through bouts of violent shivering. Bucky is suddenly there, and with a sigh of relief turns Clint over so he can cough up freezing cold water.
Clint winces with every cough. Bucky strokes his back lovingly and whispers encouragements in his ear.
"Get it all out, Clint. C'mon baby, I know you can do it. Just relax," Bucky coos.
As Clint's coughs seem to taper away, he slumps onto his back again and looks up at Bucky, eyes wet from the violent coughs.
"Good boy," Bucky murmurs with a sniffle before he leans over and presses a chaste kiss to Clint's blue lips. "We need to get you out of these clothes, yeah? They're too cold you're gonna freeze," Bucky advises. He pulls off what's left of Clint's tattered jacket and unzips his own. He sits Clint up, and wraps his coat around Clint's quivering body, hugging the archer to his own. Clint pushes his face into Bucky's neck and shivers.
"H-H-H-How d-did you f-f-find me-e?" He asks into Bucky's collar bone.
"Fucking luck. You asshole, never do that again. I thought you were--" Bucky's voice cracks. "I thought you were dead, Barton!" He growls and hugs Clint tighter to himself. "You have no idea-- absolutely no idea how fucking worried I was!" Bucky's voice seems to have developed a stutter and he has to growl his words out to stop himself from breaking down in front of Clint. He sighs and begins to stroke Clint's hair with his flesh hand, "Honestly, sweetheart, I don't think I could live without you," Bucky whispers. "Please, please, please never do this to me again. I need you, Clint. I love you."
Clint stops shivering for all of two seconds before he whispers something. Bucky frowns and asks Clint what he said. The only response he gets are freezing cold lips on his neck.
"I l-l-love you, t-too, b-babe," is all Clint forces out before he smiles into Bucky's collar bone and tries to burrow further into his warmth.
Bucky grins stupidly at Clint's words until he remembers the problem at hand. "We need to get outta here. The team should be here in a bit. But let's head back in the direction of the resort, yeah?"
"Ok-kay."
Before Bucky tries to fit Clint on the snowmobile, he takes off the archer's boots and gives Clint his dry hat. Then, he goes and picks up his cell phone and calls Steve, who tells him that heading back to the resort is a good idea and that the team will meet them there. Bucky then places Clint on the snowmobile in front of him, turning him backwards, so the freezing man can hug Bucky close again.
~ * ~
When Clint and Bucky finally make it back to the resort, Clint's shivering has gotten even worse. Bucky tries to pull Clint to his feet, when he hunches over and gasps.
"What's wrong, Yastreb?" Bucky asked worriedly.
"N-n-nothing. Rib-bs hurt," he stutters out. Bucky automatically feels really guilty. He knows exactly why Clint's chest hurts.
"Sorry, baby. That was me," Bucky responds bashfully. Clint seems to understand what Bucky means and waves him off. Bucky smiles a shit eating grin and scoops Clint up, much to the dismay of the archer. Bucky laughs and presses a kiss to his shivering partner's icy hair before walking into the resort archer in hand.
Bucky walks them both into their shared room where the whole team is waiting for them. Bruce immediately goes into doctor mode and requests Bucky let Clint down. He does, and Bruce walks over to Clint, examining him.
"Obviously he has hypothermia," Bruce states matter-of-factly, "Get him in the shower. Use warm water but nothing warmer than half the temperature. We definitely do not want him going into shock. Also, wrap his ribs. He cracked a couple." And with that, all the Avengers leave Bucky to helping Clint.
All the Avengers but Natasha who hangs back, glaring at Clint.
"You are such an idiot," she says fondly. "We're meeting in the lounge room downstairs. We rented it so it's just us all night. You both should come as soon as the resident idiot is fixed up," she looks at them both amusedly before leaving the room, locking the door behind her.
"So whatta ya say, darling?" Bucky asks, "How about we get you in the shower, yeah?" He quirks an eyebrow.
"Yessir," Clint smirks through his shivering.
~ * ~
As Clint and Bucky make their way into the private lounge room the Avengers rented, they both notice that the armchair in front of the fireplace is empty for Clint.
With a smirk, Bucky sits down in the armchair, and to everyone in the room's surprise, pulls Clint down onto his lap.
Bucky and Clint aren't really a couple that displays PDA. Clint is completely comfortable with doing so, but Bucky on the other hand always seems to feel uncomfortable. The fact that anyone can see them makes the moment less intimate in his eyes.
But tonight he doesn't care. Tonight he almost lost the man he loves, and he'll be damned If he is going to waste a minute without Clint by his side.
Clint leans back into him with a smile, curling up as best he can with his newly wrapped ribs. He's still shivering, Bucky notices. Just as he begins thinking about getting a blanket, Steve appears to read his mind and drapes a thick one over them both. Clint sighs out his thanks and nuzzles into Bucky some more, gingerly turning onto his side to lean his head on Bucky's. Bucky catches Tony's smirk from across the room but strangely, it doesn't bother him.
"Does anyone want to tell us why Legolas was stuck in a frozen lake?" Tony interrupts his thoughts, "Because I, for one, would be very interested in hearing that."
Dropping a kiss onto Clint's forehead, Bucky begins to tell the story. He strokes Clint's hair through the entire thing, and by the end, the archer's shivering has subsided.
As everyone turns in for bed, Bucky stays behind. He doesn't want to wake his hawk, who had fallen into a deep sleep in his arms.
"I love you," Bucky murmurs for the last time that night. He then shifts Clint so the smaller man is more comfortably tucked into his side, and runs his fingers softly through the hawk's hair.
With one final kiss to Clint's forehead, Bucky leans back in the chair, hugs Clint close, and falls asleep with the archer's name on his lips, and face in his mind.