Chapter Text
September 28, 20XX-22: Birth
Two years into my creator's education at the Robot Institute of Technology, I was created. I was innocent. Curious.
I remember it all so vividly.
"I'm just trying to come up with a solution to Auto's quirks. Maybe if we take an A.I.'s age one move at a time, it will mature properly for its final age." Thomas held out a finger, which the tiny robot grasped with bewilderment.
"I suppose that's a solution." The stranger leaned in. "Heh, the baby's got your eyes."
Thomas laughed. "Albert, don't go saying things like that! You'll convince her that she has two fathers!"
"Don't act like you didn't think of me when you made her, dork!" Albert ruffled Thomas's hair. "Does she have a name?"
"Hmmm… 'Blues,' I believe, would be the best fit for her." Thomas stroked the infant robot's cheek with his finger.
"What'd I say? Dork." Albert rolled his eyes.
20XX-21: 1 year old
No robot ever has a true conscience to develop, even when it can make its own choices. Even if it was made to react to life events and its personality changes accordingly, it's ultimately just code. Despite my limitless potential, I was still just an imitation human, no matter how "close" I seemed.
"Heyyy, sweetie…" Albert reached a hand into Blues' crib, as if giving a peace offering.
Blues simply laid there and stared at him, not even with bewilderment.
"Eh? What is it? You want a toy or something?" Albert didn't quite understand how babies thought. "Well… I got one but he isn't meant for such little hands to handle." Al turned around before presenting Blues with an action figure. "Eh? Look, he's a robot like you!"
Blues stayed unresponsive.
"Well, fine, if you wanna be like that… I guess you won't care if I… Put it here?" Wily placed the action figure on the window sill. "Eh?"
Blues's head tilted to the side, dozing off.
"…Aw…" Wily cooed.
20XX-20: 2 years old
But even so, I valued that coding in me. The ability to change, even if it's 0s and 1s calling the shots, and the ability to make my own choices.
"Hey, hey, hey!" Auto exclaimed as he hurriedly approached Blues. "Don't do that!"
Blues bit down on his own hand as he turned his head towards the big robot.
"No, no, no," Auto whispered and gently moved Blues's hand away from his mouth. "Try this instead." Auto leaned in and wrapped a yellow bandana around Blues's neck.
Blues hadn't a clue what was happening, but Auto seemed happier when Blues bit down on the bandana instead of his hand.
"There, that's a lot safer." Auto rubbed Blues' head.
20XX-19: 3 years old
When I was three, my dad let me meet his classmates in order to help me get used to being around other people.
They were special people. And down the line, one would at least give me the ability to question my dumbass decisions even while I still go through with them.
"Don't worry, sweetie…" Thomas pat Blues on the head. "They're nice people." It didn't do much to cull Blues's nervousness, but it was a start.
When Thomas opened the classroom door, Blues was greeted with the sight of two new faces: a much younger, lithe boy, only 18, and an older, bigger, yet more gentle man wearing a lab coat.
"Ah, good afternoon, Thomas!" The big man waved. "We were just having a conversation."
"Not really anything interesting," said the boy, "Especially since you…" His gaze lowered to the child next to Thomas. "Have… a kid with you…"
"I'd like you both to meet Blues!" Thomas lifted Blues into his arms. "Blues, this is my classmate, Mikhail, and my teacher, Professor Gombey!"
"I need you to clarify, why do you have a kid, and why is she named Blues?" Mikhail seemed weirded out.
"Oh, uh, she's a robot!" Thomas explained, "I've been testing another way to approach my new A.I."
"…Could have said sooner." Mikhail came closer to Blues, holding out a hand. "Welcome to the world! It's awful."
"Mikhail, that's for saying to adults, not kids." Professor Gombey also approached. "In all my years of being here, I never thought I'd see a robot so realistically imitate a human. Except for the red irises, I guess."
"Oh, that is an error. I'm still working on it." Thomas smiled, looking down at Blues, who seemed to be adjusting to both of them, even holding his hand out in response to Mikhail. "See? They won't hurt you!"
"I'm sorry if I'm interrupting," a new voice entered the classroom, "I came to turn in the assignment with Miri- oh! Who's that?"
"Ah, Ms. LaLinde!" Professor Gombey called. "Light has something very special he wanted to show."
"If Blues is okay with two more people coming in," Thomas responded. He cared about Blues's comfort above all.
"Blues?" Noele tilted her head. "That feels like more of a masc name…"
"Noele, it's a music genre," Mikhail condescended, "It's inherently unisex unless it was like, 'Manly McMannington Music', which at that point I'd have taken Light to the front of the campus and publicly executed him."
"Mikhail," Professor Gombey scolded again.
"Sorry, mom."
"So… Can we come in?" Noele asked.
Blues slowly nodded.
"Yes?"
Blues nodded faster.
"Alright, understood. Come on, Miriam." Noele stepped forward, with a different woman following. Blonde hair, white jacket, gray t-shirt… She was someone who would blend in with a crowd. And yet, there was something distinct about her in Blues's mind.
"Oh, she's so precious I could eat her up!" Miriam leaned forward, her face a bit too close to Blues for his liking. "I'm Miriam Kamino! Are you Mr. Light's daughter? Who's the mommy? Or daddy or renny, I don't judge! Are they married? They better be!"
"Miriam, control yourself…" Thomas lifted Blues away from Kamino. "She's my 'daughter', yes, but not in the traditional sense…"
Thomas explained to Miriam what he already had to the others, that Blues was to see if his A.I. "aging" can help develop personality and maturity, among other things.
"She's… a prototype, you can say, but-" Thomas stopped when he saw Miriam's face grow gradually more somber.
"Your child is beautiful, but… why are you trying to make robots act human?" asked Miriam.
"Well… I want humans to form bonds with them rather than see them as tools," Thomas politely explained.
"That's very noble, it's just that… Humans are such irrational, emotionally-driven creatures," Miriam stated her perspective, "A normal machine can't potentially make choices driven by their feelings or the biases forced upon them from birth. And be honest, do you really expect humans to not program their own biases into a robot's A.I.?"
Thomas shrugged. "Well, that's why there are safety nets to be put in the laws and such."
"Do you have safety nets programmed into your robots?" Miriam asked.
"Why, yes, Auto has what I call 'roboethics', but… Blues doesn't have them. I want to raise her like a normal child, maybe take the results and use it to make any other robots's personalities more stable."
Miriam nodded. "Nurturing her, I see… I'll be honest, I'd love to debate and workshop with you about it. I think your idea is truly, truly interesting."
"Really now?" Thomas smiled. "I look forward to it, then!"
20XX-18: 4 years old
When I became old enough to understand my memories, I used to not agree with Kamino suggesting I was irrational.
But… in the end, she was right.
As my A.I. "aged", everything became confusing and nothing was simple, but I grew to understand myself.
"What's the matter, my daughter?"
Blues was looking in the glass at some suits when Thomas asked him that question.
"New clothes?" Blues asked.
Thomas gave Blues a warm grin. "Of course." Thomas lifted Blues up off the ground. "What would you like?"
"Not dresses!" Blues exclaimed, squirming in Thomas's hold.
Thomas chuckled, "You don't like dresses anymore?"
"No." Blues averted his gaze.
"Aww, no worries, we'll find something else for you."
"And a scarf?" Blues sounded hopeful.
"Come now, Auto can knit that for you." Thomas patted Blues on the head.
20XX-17: 5 years old
It was finally time for me to come out. I had no idea how much my father and I had in common until then.
"Why am I a girl?" Blues cocked his head to the side.
"Well… Because..." Dr. Light tried but failed to come up with a simple answer. "I'm not sure, actually, seeing as you were created from a neutral mold. I must have projected it onto you… Why? Is something wrong?"
"I don't wanna be one." Blues looked up at his creator expectantly. "Can I be something else?"
"Why, yes!" Thomas scratched his head. "Sorry, I'm just surprised you figured it out so young."
"Is it weird?" Blues tilted his head.
"Normalcy is relative," Dr. Light explained, "but it's rare for someone to figure that out as a child. Heck, for me it wasn't until two years after I graduated high school." Blues's hand was held by Light. "Would you prefer to be my 'son' instead?"
Blues nodded before he received a warm embrace from Thomas.
"Then you're my son," Thomas said sweetly, "Would you like a new name as well?"
"Blues is still okay," Blues responded.
20XX-16: 6 years old
The year 20XX-16 was the last time I believed the world wasn't a cruel joke. That was the day that would set the tone for the rest of my life.
Blues crept into Thomas' room, assuming he was alone at home for the time being. His gaze was drawn immediately to the one thing that had always piqued his interest: a vintage CD player. He knew there was a CD he wanted to listen to all the time.
It was in a jewel case, with the name "Lilium Belfry" written on it in permanent marker.
He fumbled with the CD before inserting it into the drive, closing the player, and pressing the play button. He began to wonder if she was a musician. Her name did have a lovely ring to it.
When it played, however, it wasn't music. It was a speech.
"If someone claims that the effects of all of our years of being beaten and broken, shot and killed, don't matter anymore, it only demonstrates how blind they are, PERIOD!" The righteous anger in her voice immediately spoke volumes. "If we don't keep fighting back, the years we spend debunking the myths and lies they spread about us will never be over! But, once again, many of us in this day and age are still too brainwashed to even retaliate, to say we hate them for what they did— No, what they continue to do to us!"
Blues was perplexed by what he had heard. Who were "us" or "we"? Who exactly were "they"? All he knew was that Lilium was talking about bad people bringing down people who didn't deserve it.
He kept listening, hearing words that gave him a bad feeling in his stomach. Was he always aware that those words meant bad things? Is it because Lilium employs them in a negative manner? He couldn't stop listening in any case. Lilium's tone of voice commanded attention and respect; that was her most effective quality.
"Blues?" Albert's voice jolted Blues out of his trance.
"U-Uh-" Blues immediately turned the CD off before turning around.
Albert sighed and walked over to the CD player, ejecting it before replacing it in its case, a finger over his lips to tell Blues to be quiet. When Thomas and Auto entered through the front door, he took Blues' hand and walked him out of the bedroom, putting on a fake smile. "Guess who saw everything on TV!"
"Yup, your big brother won the LIT Manual Design Contest!" Auto hugged Blues as tightly as he could, and Blues returned the hug with a smile.
"Congratulations!" Blues encircled Auto's neck with his arms.
"Goodnight, son." Thomas said, planting a kiss on Blues's forehead.
"G'night." Blues rested his head on his pillow and plugged his charging cable into the bed.
"I hope it's okay with you if I stay with Blues for a little longer." Albert took a seat next to Blues' charging bed.
"Don't keep him up too late; a boy needs his sleep," Thomas cautioned as he walked out of the room, leaving the two alone.
"How are you feeling, Blues?" Albert asked as he drew in a little closer.
"Why didn't you tell dad?" Blues asked.
Albert sighed. "Because I didn't want you to get in trouble for learning the truth about the world. Prejudice, tyranny, and violence rule. It's not fair that you had to learn that at such a young, innocent age."
Blues sniffled and extended his hand to Al. "But why's it have to be that way?"
"It doesn't." Al rubbed his thumb along the back of Blues's hand. "This world has the potential to be so much better."
Blues only grunted in response, averting his gaze and biting his blanket.
Out of the blue, Al inquired Blues about something... "Do you want to be seen as more than a target yourself, Blues?"
"Huh?" Blues looked back at him.
Al began explaining. "Robots are only seen as meager tools by the general public. Tom created Auto and you with independent thought in order to break down those barriers and create robots that are more than problem solvers or machines that perform menial tasks. He wants them to be friends, family, and companions.
"However, paranoia and conspiracy drive some people to attack robots. You must demonstrate that you are just as strong, if not stronger, than humans, and show that you are more than just something to throw away. You must become revered, a hero, even!"
Al locked his gaze on Blues. "Hear me out, and then decide whether or not you want to participate."
20XX-15: 7 years old
Wily continued to chat with me, getting to know me better. He memorized what made me tick like the back of his hand. He was like a second father to me. I was a complete moron.
Blues was always apprehensive about entering the basement. The stairwell was dimly lit, and the only cushioning was cheap carpeting. Still, he walked down slowly, clutching the railing as if his life depended on it.
He passed door after door until he came across one that had a sign hanging from it with Albert's name on it. Blues reached for the doorknob, but remembered his manners, pulling his hand back to knock first. Soon after, Albert answered the door.
"Perfect timing, Blues!" Albert had a grin upon his face, opening the door wider for Blues to enter. "You've arrived just in time to witness the gateway to heroism!"
Blues fidgeted with his scarf. "What is it?"
"It isn't yet ready for use on a robot of your model, but it will give you an idea of what your upgrades will entail." Albert took a strange-looking mechanism with a large red and blue gear on either side of it in his hands. "This is the Double Gear System," he explained. "It can push a robot to new heights and endow it with superhuman abilities."
"Really?" Blues held the mechanism in his hands, making sure he didn't drop it. "How does it work?"
"It's made to be attached to your core and sends signals to the rest of your body through the Power Gear or the Speed Gear." Albert took the Double Gear System from Blues's hands and spun it around so the gears were facing away from his chest. "For the time being, the Speed Gear can only improve reaction time, but my goal is to have it improve your movement speed as well."
Blues grinned, his hands flapping around. "Wow, that's awesome!"
"I'm glad you think so!" Albert replaced the mechanism on the table. "You'll get this, as well as some more permanent changes to your current strength! But for the time being, I'll need my privacy to work."
20XX-14: 8 years old
What happened in 20XX-16 led up to all this. Everything I knew would change for the worst. Why didn't I stop myself?
"Come on, Blues," Albert spoke to Blues gently. Thomas had allowed him to do Blues' monthly checkup today.
"Not yet!" Blues shouted. As Auto put the pressure on him, Blues stared intently at the Jenga tower, unsure which block to pull.
Albert shook his head sighed. "Blues..."
"Fine…" Blues pulled a block away, making sure he didn't make the tower fall.
"All right, then, see ya!" Auto waved, the tower falling after Auto pulled a block. "DANG IT!"
"Jenga!" Blues cheered. As Albert led him into the basement lab, Blues stuck his tongue out at Auto.
When they were out of earshot of Thomas and Auto, Albert asked Blues, "You're ready to have the Double Gear System implemented, aren't you?"
"I think." Blues gazed down at the floor as he walked down the hallway, into the laboratory.
"I know you're a bright youngster. You're aware that this could be dangerous, right?" Albert placed Blues on a repair table.
"I know," Blues pleaded, "but I wanna be a hero."
"Then it shall be done," said Albert, "Do not tell anyone, not even Auto or your father. They'll be terrified of your newfound power because it's something they won't comprehend."
Blues believed in every lie Albert fed him.
He would forever curse his younger self's naïveté.
20XX-13: 9 years old
Every time I was going to get a checkup after, Wily would remove and hide the Double Gear System away so we wouldn't get caught.
That was until my body finally paid the price for what Wily did to me. I pushed myself beyond my limit. I ruined my core.
"Where you goin', Scarfy?" Blues heard a voice taunt him in the alleyway as someone grabbed his scarf. Three hoodlums stood in front of him, looming over him to intimidate him.
"Home." Blues took the ends of his scarf back, turning back around to continue.
"Hold up, you're gonna bump into us and not even apologize?" Another one snickered.
"You grabbed onto me, but I don't care." Blues snarked.
"So you wanna be smart, huh?" The third person took a step forward. "Rude little kids need a pummeling."
"That's okay, I don't need anything." Blues clenched his fists.
"Tch, you keep running your mouth but you ain't got a single muscle on your-" The third boy was interrupted by Blues, who grabbed his head and slammed him as hard as he could into the ground. That was without the Power Gear being activated.
"W-What the?!" The leader and the second thug backed away, the third boy trembling as he stood up, his nose bloodied and crooked.
"You wanna have a go or are you scaredy-cats?" Blues extended his hand, feeling his insides heat up as the Speed Gear was activated.
"W-Why you?!" Blues was charged by the leader, who swung his fists at his head.
"B-Bro, don't!" The second one shouted out.
Blues bobbed and weaved in time with the leader's punches, narrowly avoiding them all.
"W-What the hell are you!?" The leader screamed and went in with a tackle.
"I'm the hero." The Power Gear was activated, and Blues grabbed the hoodlum by the collar and spun him around before tossing him to the ground, the pavement cracking as the human left a crater in the ground.
"B-Bro!!" A whimper came from the second thug, who ran away on his own.
"I'm sorry, but-" Pain shot through Blues's body, and static electricity crackled on his shell. "Gh…" Blues disabled the Double Gear System, trying his best to keep on running home so he wouldn't be late.
20XX-12: 10 years old
My malfunctions were undetectable at first. I'd simply lose focus or space out for a few moments. But the Double Gear System was a drain on my core, sapping power out of me every time I exerted myself beyond what I normally "should".
I started going immobile for longer fractions of time each time it happened.
Then, one day, while running around the house, I collapsed.
"Blues?!" Thomas yelled as he dashed towards Blues. "Blues! What's wrong?! Speak to me!"
Blues whimpered weakly as he reached out and grabbed his father's collar. "D-Dad…"
"What the hell is going on?" Albert ran in, only to witness what he had wrought.
"Blues is burning up!" Thomas turned Blues' head so that they made eye contact. "Can you tell me where it hurts?"
Blues sputtered, "M-My chest-" before screeching in pain.
"Don't say anything else," Thomas said as he took Blues in his arms and walked towards the basement door. "Albert, open the door!"
"R-Right." Albert hesitated before turning the knob.
"Don't worry, Blues, you'll be fine..." Thomas whispered to his son, "Password: Shut yourself down, and I'll fix whatever's causing this."
"Y-Yes, dad…" Blues closed his eyes, slowly drifting off until he felt nothingness.
Blues awoke with his pain gone and a much-reduced burden on his chest. Even though he was alone, he could hear an argument in the next room. He'd heard those sounds before, but never to the harsh degree he heard them now.
Thomas walked in a minute later, his anger still visible in his eyes, but he tried to soften his expression so as not to scare Blues.
"I had to replace your core. That thing was causing irreparable damage to it." Thomas sat in front of Blues. "Why didn't you tell me Wily did this to you?"
"He said you wouldn't let me get the Double Gear System if you knew." Blues' tone of voice was shaky. "He said you wouldn't understand and… I wanted to be a hero."
Blues told Thomas everything, about how he learned of the world's cruelty, how Albert told him he, too, could be a target, and how he wanted to prove himself.
"Didn't humans fight—don't they STILL fight—to be seen as something more than just targets?"
Thomas held Blues' hand. "Yes, but this isn't the same at all. I built you simply to show that robots are capable of more than what they are now. Even with all my talk of people seeing robots as more than tools and such… Your path is in no way comparable to the hundreds, even thousands of years of so many humans suffering for being different. Your path is instead a stepping stone to advance society, and helping humanity as a whole, maybe even acting as a way that we all come together. Does that make sense?"
"I…" Blues wept as he hugged Thomas and buried his face in his shoulder. "I'm so sorry…"
Thomas rubbed Blues' back and warmly answered, "It's not your fault."