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Dear Markus,

I hope this letter finds you well. It has been some time since I last saw you. I hope that you were able to claim the throne to Kaelstoop successfully. If your future citizens give you any trouble at all, please do let me know–I am certain they would be amenable to giving you your birthright under the threat of the whole country going up in flames and turning the floating capital into an artificial raincloud, one that rains down blood and bodies onto the land below.

Of course, I know of your preference to have something to actually rule over, so I have very little intent of carrying out my threat, though your people do not need to know that. That being said, if they are overly resistant to your no doubt fair rule, there is no shame in writing off the kingdom as a loss and coming to live here, with the rest of us. 

It is strange to me, that you alone are apart from us. Of course, Sokhbarr and J'er'em'ih have returned to their swamp to raise J'er'em'ih’s children, and Efink’s physical world has narrowed down to a little pool of blood in our basement, but to visit them is no great loss, and they have permanent addresses (Efink moreso than most) where I can show up and be more-or-less guaranteed to see or hear word of them. But compared to them, the few days as the crow flies to Kaelstoop seems dreadfully long, and of course, as a lord of the sky, there is always a chance that you are en route, going somewhere or coming somewhere, and so it might be weeks before a letter such as this finally ends up in your hands, if at all.

I suppose that is what is truly strange to me. Distance can be surmounted, of course—I myself have traveled many leagues in my days, by ship, beast, or foot. But for the first time in my life, I have people I wish to write to and hear from, but I cannot trust that my letters will get to you in a timely manner. I choose to believe that we became fast friends, our little group of Lieutenants, and though you are different from the rest of us in many ways, I do not wish for you to be isolated and eventually drift away from our group. I do not wish any of us to drift away, nor for our differences to be a cause for loosening bonds, but it is easier to maintain the notion of friendship when one can trek to their friend’s room or jot off a quick note inviting them over for tea that will be delivered in a timely manner. 

That is all to say that I wish for us to remain friends, Markus St. Vincent. And I will do my utmost to maintain that friendship. Including scrounging up some parchment and a pen and some ink (that was very dried; if my script is splotchy it is because I had to reconstitute the ink, which I did quite inexpertly) and sitting down to write a real, proper letter for the first time in almost two hundred years. If you reply, please mention when you received this letter—I am sending it to the royal residence of Kaelstoop, dearly hoping that you are there to receive it. If you are not, then I hope this letter will be there to receive you home. 

Sincerely yours,

Leiland.

–

Dear Leiland,

I was, in fact, at home to receive your letter. And I did, in fact, take Kaelstoop. You definitely had some luck in the timing. For the past few weeks I’ve been in Kaelstoop Manor, making some changes around here, gathering my fleet, and setting up a series of governors and stewards who I can trust to watch over Kaelstoop when I am absent. As you could probably tell, I have no intention of sitting on my ass ruling over Kaelstoop. I’m much more pirate than king, and I want to be out there, on a ship with a hull full of stolen goods.

While I appreciate the offer, I don’t think I need you to make it rain blood and bodies from my capital city. People seem wary of suddenly being allied with the forces of shadow, but they’re all pirates at heart, and one of the first things I did was declare the contract making the kingdoms of the forces of light immune from marauding null and void. So now instead of taking on mostly mercenary work our people can return to being pirates instead. The mood has been pretty pleased around here as a result, and recruitment for the Forgotten Fleet is higher than ever. I even get the pick of the litter, as many folks are inquiring about working under me specifically on my future flagship. 

I have to admit, a ship the size of The Siren wasn’t exactly my ideal situation. After I was abandoned, the only three crew members I could scrounge up were the ones you met. And while Anne (rest her soul) was plenty competent enough for three, the other two weren’t exactly the freshest fish in the barrel. But now that I’m king again, I’m going to be shopping around for something bigger and more worthy of being a flagship of a pirate king, with enough crew members to staff it comfortably. Unfortunately, this means I need to carefully vet the folks that I bring on board to make sure none of them are harboring ideas of assassination and such, so that’s going to be a long, boring process, one that’s probably going to keep me grounded in Kaelstoop Manor for the time being. If only I had a handful of trusted Lieutenants around me for company and assistance, eh? Hint, hint.

As soon as it looks like I’m gearing up to leave, though, I’ll let you know. That worry you had about it being hard for a letter to catch up to me is a big concern for our people, too, and we have means to deal with it. As soon as I get a flagship, I’ll send you a magnet dove setup. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a magnet dove–they’re these birds that line their nests with metal, and they fly very fast and far. They can be trained to fly between a pair of nests, and even if the nests move, they can miraculously find their way to the nest’s new location. I’ll give you some doves that will home in on my flagship, so no matter where I am in the world, you and the others can send a letter that’ll go straight to me, and I can write back one that’ll go straight to you.

After all, I also want to be friends. I’m allied with Gorgar now, and with that all of you, but also, we’re all brothers and sisters. Even though basically everything that happened all happened in one shitty, shitty day, there’s nothing like dealing with a bunch of crazy shit at once that brings people together, right? 

Anyways, if you want to keep writing to me, you can keep writing to Kaelstoop Manor. I’ll be posted here for at least a month, probably several. It’s slow going, being king. Already I want to be sailing the sky with the wind at my back and sun in my face. 

Maybe you had the right idea after all, burning your old kingdom to the ground. Ruling sucks!

Your friend,

Markus St. Vincent

–

Dear Markus, 

I am terribly happy to hear that Kaelstoop has fallen under your rule. Your letter to Lilith has also arrived, announcing that Gorgar now has an ally in Kaelstoop, which was a grand hit when Lilith announced it to the people—granted, a large contingent of the crowd were Team Spiders, so the reaction was likely somewhat biased. Queen Lilith's approval rate is the highest Gorgar has ever seen, but to be clear, not all of her supporters are spiders! She is a very popular leader and her platform of evil, but loving and supportive evil, has taken the citizens by a storm.

I do apologize—I have politics on the mind. I find myself listening to politics all day, as I spend my days advising Lilith. Leiland Jr. gave me the task of killing that damnable halfling, but we are in no rush to achieve that goal, so I've been taking my time and helping get everything settled around here. I imagine we're in a similar state of flux as you: lots of talking, lots of suspicion and vetting, lots of locating resources and figuring out who should be in charge of what. I am halfway considering taking you up on your offer and abandoning my post here to join you. The other Lieutenants are here to advise Lilith, after all; if you have half of the concerns to deal with as Lilith has, I do not think you and John Feathers (I know he prefers JJ, but the name John Feathers flows off of the pen and the tongue so delightfully; please don't tell him I call him John Feathers behind his back) deserve to deal with them alone. I am certainly open to being convinced to come visit, if you ask nicely. 

I hope you can get yourself a ship and a crew soon. I heartily agree that ruling does suck. I certainly do not regret burning my original home to ash, but I imagine you have more patience than I, from your work as a captain, and will therefore fare far better as a king than I could.

Your friend,

Leiland.

–

Dear Leiland,

I got a ship! Entirely by accident! It's sort of a funny story.

From what I hear, one of our fleet ships attacked a ship from Tiriath. Word must have gone back to Tiriath somehow, and they sent some blowhard politcian/diplomat or whatever to see what's up. He comes racing into the throne room demanding to see my father and froze when he saw me. 

"What happened to the king of Kaelstoop!" he said. Imagine a hunched-over old human man squealing indignantly.

"You stand before him," I said. 

"What's the meaning of this! We had a deal! Where is the old king!" he squealed. 

"I can take you to see him," I offered. 

"Yes, I need an explanation for the looting and burning of our battleship right away!" he said. 

So I took him up to the grand balcony of the palace. 

When I stepped outside, I saw the most beautiful lady I've ever seen. 

She has three masts, and she’s nice and deep, with three stories (and a half, if you count the aftcastle) tucked inside of her. She has plenty of room on her but she's quick on her feet for a lady of her size, and I was in love at first sight. 

I asked the man if that was the ship he came in on.

"Yes, that's my ship," he said.

"Not anymore," I said. 

"You can't just take my ship! We're allies!" he blustered. 

"Take it up with the previous king," I said, and I threw him off the balcony.

Before his screams even faded, I went and gathered some volunteers to help me claim the ship for my own. The ship was docked, completely none the wiser as to the fate of its previous owner, and me and some folks boarded it, killed or captured the various soldiers and sailors on board, and escorted them off the ship. 

So now she's mine! She's not going to be The Divinity anymore, of course. I'm thinking of naming her the Siren II . The last Siren was a feisty little lass, but she and I weren't destined to be partners forever. But I think this one is going to be my lady for life, and I'm gonna deck her out in all the pretty things befitting of the Pirate King's flagship. I've already designed the figurehead that's going to be our titular Siren. I had a design in mind for when I get my ship, and I'm stoked that I get to finally commission it and have it mounted on a good and proper ship. Beyond aesthetic concerns, there's still a lot of shit to do before she's ready for her maiden voyage, but I'm over the moon that such a perfect ship fell into my lap.

Sorry for all the excitement over the new ship, I probably went on far too long about it. I'm glad Lilith is getting the recognition she deserves, but sorry that it comes with having to deal with the same shit that we're going through. I'd love to steal you away from all the politicking over there to enjoy the sights and tastes of my home over here, before I gang-press you into helping me with my politicking over here. Please tell me you have good sense when it comes to people; vetting people is definitely turning out to be the most time-consuming part of all of my duties, and the only thing that can speed it up is having more people on hand that I can fully trust.

I'm not sure if that's the "nice ask" you were thinking of, but I don't want to take you away from the Bloodkeep too long if things are as busy over there as I suspect them to be. If you have time or want to come visit, let me know—I can send John Feathers (his name is very fun to say and write. I won't tell if you won't tell) over to pick you up, since while I am no longer shipless, I am sort of crewless. I suppose I can commandeer any of the Forgotten Fleet ships, but I admit I’m a bit superstitious when it comes to guesting aboard someone else's ship.

I spent a lot of time rambling about ships in this letter. I'm not sure I can guarantee my next letter will be any more riveting—I got ships and politicks on the brain, to borrow your phrase.

Your friend,

Markus St. Vincent

–

Dear Markus,

Allow me to extend a hearty congratulations on your new ship! I must admit, I felt a twinge of jealousy when you were describing her with such love. No one has ever described me with such passion! But I have heard that a ship will always be a pirate's first love, and I definitely felt the truth in the idiom while reading your letter. I was very amused to hear your account of how you claimed her from the Trinithan politician/diplomat/whatever he was. I can so clearly imagine his shrieks as he fell to his death from the floating city, and I so wish I was there to see it. I read that part of the letter out to Lilith, Efink, Maggie, and Leiland over tea, and they all laughed with such merriment, though Leiland has learned the word "blowhard" from you and uses it to describe every person he doesn't approve of now. Lilith has asked me to tell you that a few arcane cannons will be waiting at the Bloodkeep for you to pick up as a christening gift for the new Siren II , though she cautions you that there is a set number we will give you, so you cannot steal more arcane cannons from us, you cheeky pirate.

Please do not apologize for writing about your ship. It brings me much amusement to see you gush over your new ship, and it is a worthy cause for celebration. She does sound like a ship worth bragging about. If those around you tire of hearing about the state of your ship, I will always be a willing ear.

As for the state of politicking over here, Lilith seems to have everything well enough in hand—it certainly helps that she has not only me Efink and Maggie and I as advisors, but also thousands upon thousands of children that are near and dear to her heart and have very little political ambition. You, on the other hand, seem to have just yourself and John Feathers. I assure you, if you wish to have me or any more of the Lieutenants with you, you only need ask. And I would certainly love to see Kaelstoop, as well as your no doubt beautiful new ship. I promise I will sit next to you nicely and listen to you ramble about ships and politics.

Yours,

Leiland.

–

Dear Leiland.

Have you ever noticed that you end all of your letters with a dot? I'm not making fun of you, I just think it's cute—it gives all your signatures an air of finality. "That is all," I imagine that dot saying. Though now I'm worried that because I pointed it out, you're going to stop dotting your signatures. Don't! I like it, I think it's very funny.

With that detour out of the way, let me outright say what we’re both dancing around. Come visit Kaelstoop! Pack your things and settle your affairs in Gorgar. I have gathered enough of a skeleton crew for the Siren II to sail her short distances. She’s all dolled up with a new figurehead and some layout changes. Sailing to Gorgar will give me a chance to know her a little better, it’ll give you and everyone else can meet her, and I can deck her out with the arcane cannons. And afterwards, you and I can sail back to Kaelstoop in style.

Of course, one of the most important things I added to the Siren II was a magnet dove coop. Along with this letter I’m also sending you a handful of doves and their respective nests. All of the doves are trained to fly between wherever you put their nests (I recommend somewhere relatively high up with an openable window) and their other nests onboard the Siren II . Now, you can be certain that your letters will find me, anywhere in the world. Though I imagine that’s going to be less important to you for at least a short while, since you’ll be in Kaelstoop or on the Siren II for—well, as long as I can steal you away for, if I’m honest.

I was thinking that, when the Siren II is ready and fully decked-out, we could go hunting for Galfast together? We could kill two birds with one stone and help each other out with our goals—you and your halfling hunt, me and my pirate business. And it’d be fun, hanging out and fighting together again.

I’m glad that my story about the Trinithan diplomat (found out a bit ago that he was a diplomat who worked closely with my father; most of the no-piracy contract that my father signed was written up by him and was pretty unfavorable to Kaelstoop, to be honest) has spread to the others in our party. And I’d love to see the little guy calling everyone a blowhard. Hopefully he’s still in that phase in a couple of weeks when I go to Gorgar to pick you up.

I just realized that I’ve been writing this letter as if you’ve already said yes to my proposal. You can absolutely say no, or later, if you’re interested but busy at the moment. I didn’t really realize it until now, but I am pretty excited to see you and the others again, and I’m very excited at the prospect of showing you around Kaelstoop and the Siren II . So let me know if you’re able to come visit and for how long as soon as possible. You can send your response by magnet doves—they’ll be just as fast, and any mail that comes to me on the Siren II gets routed to the palace anyways.

Yours,

Markus St. Vincent

P.S. You’ve put yourself in a very vulnerable position by allowing me to ramble on about my ship. That’s the number one thing I can talk about for hours. In the future, when you’re nursing a hangover while I sit next to you and work my jaw off talking about sails, remember that you have no one to blame but yourself.

–

Dear Markus,

Yes, yes, absolutely yes! I would be honored to be the first guest of yours on board the new Siren II . Yes to all of it, in fact—come get me in your fancy new ship, show me around your country, and once we finish sifting through the ocean of people who wish to join up with your crew, I will certainly be overjoyed to join you on the Siren II. I think we'll be very effective when working together. I've never engaged in piracy before; I only hope that I will not hinder your operations. And of course, your assistance in tracking down the halfling will be much appreciated. In practical matters, I don’t have much packing or settling to do here; as soon as you are able to come here, I will be ready to go. And I don't necessarily have any particular obligations here. Besides returning for visits on occasions (such as Leiland's birthday), I will be happy to remain as a guest on your ship for however long you're willing to host me.

Speaking of visits, the others are also overjoyed at the prospect of you coming to visit us in the very near future. We are going to have a tea party with just the six of us Lieutenants in the Tomb of Ultimate Evil, which I am greatly looking forward to. We are all also very excited about these magnet doves. The birds and their nests have been installed in a tower relatively close to my office, close enough that out of one of my windows I can currently see them hopping about inside or sometimes venturing out onto the window to perch. You neglected to mention how cute they are! One of them flew away from its nest and returned with a bloody dagger in its beak, which it proceeded to use to decorate its little nest. I have privately named that one Efink, but do not tell Efink that I did so. Because of how precious and vulnerable they are, a handful of Lilith’s children have been assigned to be their keepers, feeding and watering them but also making sure that no one is tempted to snatch one up as a quick snack. One of the children had the idea of training one of J’er’em’ih’s children to be a guard screambeast for the doves. I personally don’t know what a bird and a screambeast would make of each other, but Sokhbarr seems to think that it’ll work out, and he is the beastmaster and I am not the master of much.

Honestly, I can't imagine that you talking about ships would be anything but riveting. I only recently recalled that one of the many daydreams I had as a child was being a pirate, though I think it had less to do with the idea of piracy and more to do with the prospect of being anywhere other than where I was. And soon, in a matter of weeks, I will be once more on board a pirate ship, but this time with no urgency or destination. Life is funny like that. 

I hope to see you very soon.

Yours,

Leiland.

P.S. I never realized I did that, honestly. I don't think that it was ever taught to me, and I have no idea where else I could have picked up the habit. Perhaps it just feels wrong to end anything without a punctuation mark? My tutors were very strict with me when it came to proper grammar, and I suppose that some wires must have gotten crossed in my brain at some point. Or perhaps I just like tapping my pen against the parchment and I just never noticed. I am a little self-conscious about it now, but you seem to find it amusing, so that strange little hanger-on won't be banished from my habits just yet.

–

Dear Leiland. 

The Siren II is crewed up and ready for her maiden voyage. It will be a short one, just a few day's jaunt over to Gorgar. The weather is fine, the winds are blowing, and there is precious treasure to be found in Gorgar that needs to be snapped up and brought back to Kaelstoop immediately.

By the time you get this letter, I imagine that we'll be a mere day or two out from Gorgar. I hope they'll be enough time for you to pack. Of course, we won't be embarking right away, so you'll have a little more time to get ready if you need to.

I am pretty excited to see y'all again. And very excited to have you on board. 

Shorter letter today. Really just a notice to let you know I'm on my way. I'll save the more exciting things to tell you in person.

Yours,

Markus St. Vincent

–

Dear Maggie,

As you requested, here is a letter to let you know that I've arrived in Kaelstoop. 

That is all. 

Sincerely, 

Leiland.

Just kidding. 

Kaelstoop, both the country and the city, is beautiful. It's not quite the fire and brimstone you and I are used to, but it's peculiar and beautiful in its own way. The land itself is a patchwork of heavy forests and rural grasslands and a section of coastline. Markus was telling me that he used to go camping, hunting, and fishing with his father and brother in the countryside. It is quite lovely, but it is the city of Kaelstoop that truly fascinates me.

Kaelstoop is partially made with a magical landmass that hovers in the air. Markus assures me that it is impossible for it to fall, and they also have magically-inclined folks keeping an eye on it 'round the clock. Much of the old town, including Kaelstoop Manor, Markus' palace, is built on that landmass, but Kaelstoop has expanded over the years with flying ships or other platforms that are permanently docked onto the landmass and each other. It becomes this confusing city where you almost always have wood underfoot and the walkways are reinforced wooden boards taking you from one docked ship to another. Besides being the city itself, these old ships are also shops, homes, restaurants, bars, brothels, guild houses—everything you can imagine in a city exists here, though flying miles above the ground.

The palace itself is beautiful, even in its current state of being redecorated. Markus told me that his father grew paranoid in his old age and fired many of his staff, including staff that had worked for the family for decades. He also took much of the fine decor and either returned them to their original owners as an offering of peace when Kaelstoop allied with the Forces of Light, or donated them to churches in an apparent bid to save his immortal soul. His poor life decisions combined with the forced pivot from piracy to mercenary work made the grand Kaelstoop Manor into a shadow of its former self, a fact which clearly weighed heavily on Markus. I was able to cheer him up by telling him that now that Kaelstoop had returned to its old ways, he and I could go about and reclaim all the fine things his father returned and take a little bit of interest for the "loan" besides. 

His fleet has been working around the clock gleefully now that they have the official backing of the king of Kaelstoop once more, and so my accomodations—both on the Siren II and in Kaelstoop manor—are sumptuous beyond reason. I don't think I've ever slept more comfortably than in the guest suite on board the Siren II . One thing that amuses me is that Markus prefers to put the nicer things on the Siren II. His reasoning is that he spends much more time on his ship than in Kaelstoop manor, so he should use the best things on the ship and his second best things in his nominal home. I found no fault in his logic, and told him so. The ship itself is grand and beautiful, by the way. I can't tell you much about the specifications besides the fact that it is big, the guest suite is large and comfortable (and mine for the foreseeable future), and the treasury is massive. The crew is small for now, but I am going to help Markus recruit more sailors so it can have its full crew before we leave Kaelstoop. Until then he has promised to show me around the city. He seems especially excited to take me out to eat. I reminded him that I hadn't properly tasted food in two hundred years, and so I was impressed even by our simple supper of chicken and tomato salad. His response was to say that he felt an even greater obligation to give me only good things to eat and drink so as not to waste my time—and my lacking ability to tolerate alcohol. Case in point, he fed me some very nice wine along with dinner, and it was so nice I indulged myself with a whole two glasses and then got so dizzy I fell onto him as he led me back to my room. I felt like a fool (and feel like one still, as I am writing to you nursing a killer hangover) but he laughed and told me it was cute.

That more-or-less sums up my time so far out of Gorgar: many impressive sights already, and I have already made a fool of myself though I have been in Kaelstoop less than a day. I do hope the rest of my stay here will go more smoothly.

With love,

Leiland.

–

Dear Maggie,

Being in Kaelstoop with Markus is quite exciting! I haven't received your letter yet (if you have sent one) but so many things have happened that I wanted to write to you before I forget.

First of all, Markus was not being boastful—the food and drink here is varied and delicious beyond compare. They eat a rich and interesting diet, from the bounty of the lower land and the loot from others, and lots of it game meat, fowl, and fish. I have tried many interesting seasonings—not just strictly spicy like in Gorgar, but much of it very fragrant in a different manner. They love fruit here, and sweets, so I have to be careful not to stuff myself during the main meal so I have room for fresh fruit and delicate sweets for dessert. Eating and drinking in general is a newly remembered pleasure in general thanks to Leiland Jr, but it's not until I got here that I realized why some humans have eating as a hobby. There are so many new things to taste, and every meal comes in a different form! I have asked Markus if any of his citizens would be interested in flying their restaurant-ship over to set up shop in Gorgar. He said there was a chance, especially since Lilith's investments in beauty and infrastructure are going to make Gorgar a little less inhospitable. The drink here is also interesting, often designed with the same love of flavorings and fruit and sugar as the food in mind. While Markus does have access to some of the best wine and alcohol in the world, since I am not allowed to have more than half a glass at a time unless we happen to be on the Siren II or inside Kaelstoop Manor (and even then I have to really plead and cajole), Markus has made up for it by always ordering me an interesting juice, soda water, or drink. 

(Markus is the one who has taken it upon himself to impose and enforce that strict limit on me, saying that he feared I would walk off the edge of the city while drunk, and I cannot say the thought did not cross my mind before. In case you are worried, let me assure you—they have a system of nets that catch many a slip of the foot, but landing in them is uncomfortable and the rescue from them is even moreso, partially due to the physical challenge and partially due to the hearty ribbing your rescuers give you as they raise you up from the nets. Yes, I have slipped and fallen twice, though once John Feathers was able to swoop in for a quick rescue.)

Before you ask, I have done other things here besides just eating and drinking. We went to the markets, and the market barges are impossibly confusing to navigate and sell everything you can imagine and things you cannot. Markus and I got separated at one point by the crush of the crowd, and I was completely panicked. It would have been impossible for me to find him again. A woman rescued me from the crowd and tucked me into the corner of her stall and gave me tea and a place to sit away from people, and then braved the crowd to go find Markus and bring him back to me. When he arrived, he and the woman began to jokingly barter over me. I'll try to recount the conversation the best I can recall:

M: Thank you so much for your help. Come on, Leiland.

W: You can't just walk off with him.

M, wary: Why not?

W: Why, you gotta pay. Fifty plat.

M, chuckling: Fifty plat? He was mine in the first place!

W: But he's not anymore, and who's fault is that?

M: I'm not paying fifty plat to buy back something that was stolen from me, that's outrageous! Fifteen plat.

W: We're pirates, sugar. He's in my tent, he's for sale by me. Cough up the fifty.

M: Ten plat.

W: Ten plat? That's an insult! Look at this fine specimen of a man! Look at his lustrous silver hair, his shiny blue eyes, his healthy body! A man like this wouldn't go for less than one hundred on the open market, so you should be grateful for the discount I'm giving you today by selling him for only fifty. 

M: I'm looking, and I'm liking what I'm seeing. I'm not walking out of here without him, but I'm not going to let you trick me in broad daylight. Twenty plat.

W: You are a stingy one. And there isn't any trickery going on here, I'm giving you the honest price. Forty plat. 

M: Having that pretty face out in the open should count as trickery. It's not fair of you to expect me to bargain when he's looking at me all "please take me home." Thirty plat, and that's my final offer. 

W: You have yourself a deal, but I definitely let you skirt by with far too big of a discount. It's only because you're my king, you hear me?

M: I won't tell anyone about the special royal discount I got this one for, then. Come on, Leiland, let's go home.

W: That's a bald-face lie and you and I know it. There's nothing a pirate loves more than bragging about how little he paid for something.

Markus and the shopkeeper laughed, and there was no exchange of platinum (I was honestly afraid there might be.) I ended up buying tea from her—without any bargaining needed, luckily; Markus deemed it a fair enough price. The tea is very good. I've enclosed some along with this letter for you and the others to try. 

On the way home I jokingly asked Markus if he thought I was only worth thirty plat. He gave me a side hug and told me that I was priceless, and that instead of paying the exorbitant price any sane merchant would demand he'd just steal me back instead. I was a little taken aback. I secretly thought thirty plat was overpriced, and said so. Markus squeezed me tighter and repeated, "Priceless." 

That was our outing to the market. I looked at some clothes, but the things Jessa designs and makes exceed anything the Free Races could make in quality and fit and beauty. I also bought some toys for Leiland, and those are enclosed as well.

Besides the market, Markus also took me to the boat docks, and showed me the different workshops where things for ships were built and repaired. He mentioned wanting the spiders that gifted him the spider-silk sails to come to Kaelstoop. He thinks they'll do good business. He's going to try and set aside a workshop space for them and maybe start some sort of talent exchange program between Kaelstoop and Gorgar. I told him again to try and send Kaelstoop chefs to Gorgar, and he laughed and teased me for my newfound obsession for food. I had a lot of trouble following his train of thought when it comes to ships, but it was honestly just nice seeing his face light up and hearing him talk himself hoarse about something that he clearly adores. I thought that he only loves money, but he loves ships, too, and he especially loves the Siren II— he was telling me about how fast it was, how many people and cargo it could hold, about all the improvements he was making to it. I'm happy that he got a ship that he can be proud of.

This letter is already very long, but there is one last outing that we went on that truly impressed me. He took me to another restaurant that was in this big, very old ship. When we go out to eat, we almost always ask for a private room or a private table, so Markus can eat with his mask off. I think the reason why he wears it even in his kingdom is that he likes how mysterious it makes him feel. It was early in the evening, which is much earlier than we typically eat dinner. The room that we were taken to was in the sort of back part of the ship towards the stern, under the raised deck that some ships have in the back. I hope you know what I’m talking about. I’m sure that I can ask Markus for the proper name of that part of the ship, but I don’t think it would be very helpful as I don’t think you know the names for the parts of a ship either. We were escorted to that room, and the walls of the room had been replaced with wooden pillars for support and panes of clear glass, so you can see the ocean and the lands below. Markus and I were seated at our table, and we ate this beautiful fish stew and some amazing bread. Partway through our meal, the room lit up in red light like fire, as the sun set over the ocean. The experience of eating good food with good company as the room around us was lit up in changing colors and the sun set, uninterrupted by any mountain range or trees or buildings was indescribable. And once the sun’s greedy rays had finally faded into darkness, we were able to see the night as a tapestry of stars. I know that our goal as evil forces is to cover the land in darkness, but now I do wonder if we would be able to keep sunsets. 

By the way, I have not just been spending my time in Kaelstoop vacationing. Markus has put me to work helping him out with screening through people who may be of use, either on the Siren II or as workers in government or in the palace. Sometimes we each work on two different people (three, for John Feathers is working his tail off alongside us), but we find it’s just as efficient if we work together. I stand behind him and hold my sword and look scornful and intimidating, Markus acts friendly and open, and we see how they react to our questioning. Afterwards, we can convene and discuss what we thought of that person. Only time will tell how effective our screening is, but so far, we’ve booted out four candidates that I am fairly certain were power-hungry or secretly conspiring against Markus, so that gives me hope. Besides working on personnel, I’ve also been helping out by reading all of the weird laws that Markus’ father had passed so he could strike any unhelpful ones from the record. So you see, I have been working just as hard over here as I was in Gorgar.

I do apologize for how long this letter is. My hand is now quite cramped, so at least you are not the only one suffering from my gregariousness. 

With love,

Leiland.

–

Dear Leiland,

Jeez, I was working on a reply to your first letter and then I got that monster of a second letter in the mail. How did it take you less time to write two letters to me than it did for me to write one to you? I’ll tell you how: it’s cuz I have a baby and you, my chief babysitter, swanned off to go hang out with Markus. Can’t believe you’d betray your queen like that. And you’re doing political work for him, too? That’s so unfair! Markus not only took John Feathers but he took the godfather of my child, too! If he’s not careful about what he steals he’s going to end up a persona non grata in Gorgar.

Kaelstoop sounds nuts, in the best way possible. John was also telling me about Kaelstoop, and I am definitely taking little Leiland Jr. over to visit as soon as Markus and John are free to come get me. I was sort of daydreaming about having John fly us over, but I realized that flying with a fussy baby Lord of the Shadows on the back of an eagle for several day probably wasn’t the brightest idea! So once you and Markus get his ship shit sorted out, come and get us and take us around that supposedly amazing place. And feed us good food. Actually, never mind—you can stay behind in Kaelstoop. I want to stay in this amazing guest suite on board the Siren II . 

The story of Markus and the lady bargaining over you made me laugh a lot, especially the fact that you ended up going for only 30 plat. I’m sure that the 50 plat was just a random number the merchant came up with, but the final price of 30 is just so hilariously specific. I keep laughing when I think of you, with your pouty expression on your face, sitting in a market stall with a price tag that says 30 plat tied to your arm.

Speaking of that story…

Leiland, you aren’t the sharpest sword in the rack. And you also aren’t the wisest guy to walk the earth. But surely even someone as hilariously incompetent as you would have noticed just how much you wrote about Markus in your last letter. Now, I would get it—after all, Markus is one of two people you know in Kaelstoop, and he’s showing you around his home town, and he is our very good friend that we haven’t seen in some time. But. All of that, combined with some weird comments I noticed you making—Markus calling you cute, complimenting your face, and taking you on all sorts of little outings…I mean, come on, taking you out for a sunset dinner? Surely you’ll notice the thing I’m hinting at.

Leiland I-don’t-know-your-middle-name I-don’t-know-your-last-either, are you in love with Markus St. Vincent?

Because it sounds awfully like you are in love with Markus St. Vincent. And it sounds scarily like Markus St. Vincent is in love with you.

You’d tell me if you were dating, right? We’re friends. 

Anyways, thank you for the toys, and the tea. The Lieutenants enjoyed the tea together, minus you two, at our last tea party. It is really good, you were right! Leiland Jr. loves his little barnyard toy set. He likes to pretend to butcher the animals. I told Jessa about your compliment towards her clothing and she absolutely preened. You can definitely leverage that into a free robe the next time you return to Gorgar. 

Your letter you sent is really long, and I was almost pressured to send a letter as long as yours in reply. But you know what? I will not. I don’t have to. So I will finish this letter right here, because I don’t have anything more to say.

Love,

Maggie.

–

Dear Maggie,

It is sort of funny that I left the politics of Gorgar only to show up and help Markus with the politics of Kaelstoop, a place which I am vastly less familiar with. Still, that is the reason why I am here, nominally. So I suppose none of us should be surprised that the excuse I used to go to Kaelstoop turned out to be the thing that I am actually doing.

To answer your question, though, Maggie. 

No, we are not dating. 

But yes, I am in love with Markus. 

I do question the wisdom of your question, Maggie. After all, it is Markus. How can anyone not be in love with him? He is handsome, strong, kind, rich, and powerful. 

Now, you are not allowed to tell him or anyone. Or else I will gift Leiland Jr. a drum.

This letter is a shorter one. I don’t have much new updates for you, but I wanted to write you back because I have some very important information: 

John Feathers has ended his relationship with Samantha Eagles.

The poor eagle is now moping around the palace, sighing heavily. He keeps saying things like, “It could have never worked out,” and, “I knew the end was near,” and, “I don’t know why I’m so torn up about this.” We ended up getting drinks at a bar together, which was a very interesting experience, listening sympathetically to John Feathers talk about eggs and relationships from an eagle’s perspective while watching him gulp beer from a shallow dish. I did not drink much at the bar, but after the bar, we returned to the palace and drank more together, and I drank enough that I fell asleep under the table. I ended up waking in my own bed, fully clothed, though, and later Markus told me with much amusement that he brought me there, and that he had to try and take off my boots while I did my best to kick him. I should really stop trying to drink past my tolerance levels.

Anyways, right now, John Feathers is a little morose. Send him an encouraging letter for now, and get ready to strike while the iron is hot.

With love and affection,

Leiland.

–

Dear Leiland.

LEILAND WHATEVER-YOUR-MIDDLE-NAME-IS WHATEVER-YOUR-LAST-NAME-IS.

YOU CANNOT JUST SAY THAT YOU ARE “IN LOVE” WITH MARKUS WITH NO FOLLOW UP.

Leiland!! He is literally taking you on dates and flirting with you all over his city! Why aren’t you two dating! You’re in love, aren’t you? Hurry up and date that man! He’s a huge catch!

Also, is this like, a crush? Is this like, you checking him out? I knew you were checking him out a little back when Everything Went Down as he revealed how hot he was—did you end up parlaying that into real feelings, or what? Tell me everything! 

Also also, don’t try and interfere with my love life. Right now, we’re trying to deal with yours. 

Also also also, this letter is short because I need to write one to John right away.

Love, 

Maggie

–

Dear Maggie,

There does seem to be a slight misunderstanding here. I am in love with him, but he is not in love with me. 

He’s just taking me out to see the best parts of Kaelstoop. It is nerve-wracking to show someone around a place you feel much affection for, as Sokhbarr demonstrated when we visited his swamp. He simply wants to put this place’s best foot forward. 

While I do admit sometimes our banter does take on a flirtatious edge, that’s just how our conversations go. There is never really any heart in it. I tease him for being a romantic and for being ridiculously handsome, he parries by going out of his way to label everything that I do “cute” even when it is absolutely not cute. And don’t think I haven’t noticed the conspiracy to try and raise my self-esteem. I notice you doing it, and Lilith doing it, and Sokhbarr doing it, and Efink doing it very half-heartedly, and Markus does the same. He compliments me on things that you people seem to think I have a complex about and is doing his best to fluff my ego with subtle compliments.

Finally, yes, I am in love with him. I am deeply in love with him, because apparently I do not know how to love in halves. I did admire how handsome he was at several points during that difficult day, but it’s not just about his appearance or his body. He pays attention to me. He listens to me when I talk, and he smiles at me, and he looks me in the eye, and he does things that make me feel like I’m someone special, like when he takes off his mask casually around me, not just to eat or drink or have a smoke but because we’re alone in a room together just chatting. 

And Maggie, he is so nice to me. No one I’ve ever had feelings for before has been simply nice. Even when he laughs at me, he always assures me that it’s not because I’m doing something laughable but because I’m doing something that makes him feel amused. And when he rambles, he pauses to apologize and ask if I’m bored of him, and when I tell him to continue and that I don’t mind listening to him, his eyes crinkle in the most wonderful way and he looks at me like I hung the moon before he continues talking about ship things that I am not smart enough to understand. He is just so nice. I don’t understand how anyone can choose to be so kind to me.

And that’s the reason we aren’t dating. I know I’m in love with him. I’ve known it for quite some time now, since before I came to Kaelstoop. But I also know that I’m not good enough for him. You know me. You know what an absolute failure I am as a person. You know that I am not important enough to be someone truly special to someone like Markus. But I am just special enough, I did something just right enough that I get to be his friend. And I know I sound so pathetically in love this whole letter, but I promise you, I swear to you on my oath to your son, that that is enough for me. That is more than I could have ever hoped to get. And I am so, so happy that I get to be by his side and not be invisible to him. He doesn’t take me for granted. He looks at me and says nice things to me and thanks me and he likes me. We don’t need to date for me to feel appreciated and loved by him. We get to be friends, so I’m happy.

Rereading this letter, I realized how pathetic I sound. But I’m used to that by now. And I am perfectly happy. And, to be honest, it does feel nice to get all of that off my chest and finally write down all the good things he makes me feel. Again, promise you won’t tell anyone. Especially not him.

Also, did you write to John? What did you say to him? Did he reply yet?

With love,

Leiland.

–

Dear Leiland,

Holy shit, there’s a lot to unpack there. First of all, your feelings for Markus are really, really sweet. I’m happy that you’ve fallen for Markus. Markus is so great, and regardless of what happens, I know he’ll take good care of you. And you deserve to be taken care of.

You also deserve to be loved. You may be a magnificent failure and have a shit taste in men (and I can say that because we have the same taste in men!!) but you deserve someone who’ll pay attention to you and love you and is nice to you. And Markus can definitely be that man. You shouldn’t settle for just being friends with him if you’re in love with him, you should tell him how you feel! I really do think that it’ll end well. Cuz no matter how much you deny it, it really does sound like that man is taking you on dates, and the only reason why you don’t know it because you’re too busy deluding yourself into thinking that you two are “just friends”. Seriously. Tell him how you feel. At the very worst, he’ll let you down gently, and it won’t change anything between you. You know it won’t, and I know it won’t. 

And I did write to John. I said that it sucks that he and Samantha broke up, and told him he should visit us more often, and that I’ll take him shopping next time he comes to visit. Just the usual things that a good friend would say. I’m not going to make a move on him so quickly, he just broke up with his girlfriend.

Love, 

Maggie

–

Dear Markus,

I have very bad news: Leiland Jr. loved the oranges you sent. It looks like you’ll have to send him more, and lots more. Maybe even start sending a steady supply of them every week or so, or at least until he gets off of oranges and moves onto the next favorite food. 

Now, I have a question for you. It’s a very important question, and there is a right answer, so you better think carefully.

Are you in love with Leiland.

You might be thinking that that’s a weird question to spring on you out of the blue. And it is. And you might be wondering if there’s a reason why I asked that question. And there is. But, critically, I cannot tell you the reason why I asked you that question.

Think about it carefully. Veeeery carefully. You’ll get it, I know you will.

Also, for completely unrelated reasons—do NOT tell Leiland that I asked you if you are in love with him or not. 

Do you get it? I can’t spell it out for you more than I already have or else Leiland Jr. is going to have a new drum kit.

Anyways—I’m getting a bit of a warm, I think. I usually get a warm around this time of the year. I’m worried about getting Leiland Jr. sick, so my handmaidens will probably have to take care of him until I get better. You make sure you take care of yourself. Efink told me humans don’t get warms, but they get “colds” instead. It sounds very unpleasant. 

Love,

Maggie

–

Dear Maggie,

I’ll send you guys more oranges. I’ll send plenty for you to eat, too. People say they’re good for colds. I don’t know what they’ll do for a warm, but if it’s the equivalent as it seems it is, then maybe it’ll help you get over your warm faster. I’m doing okay. It’s not cold season yet, but I’ll take care of myself.

And yes. I am in love with Leiland. 

You’re probably going to ask me why, and I’m going to stop you there. He’s cute! And he’s hot. I love the way he’s both a charismatic, confident, cool Vinguri and an adorably pouty kicked puppy of a man. He always makes me laugh, and we can talk about anything and everything for hours, and when I talk he always looks at me with this adoring open look on his face that makes my heart skip a few beats and makes me lose my train of thought. I love the way that he can’t control his expressions because he’s not used to being seen without his helmet, I think he’s so cute when he gets all giggly and drunk from two glasses of strong wine. 

I knew that I was in love with him, really in love with him when I took him down to the palace’s treasury to show off all of our treasures we have. And even though we were in a room with the most wealth that anyone could ever have in one place, I couldn’t stop looking at him, waiting to see if he was impressed.

Sorry for going off about that. The only person around me I can get this off my chest with is John Feathers, and I’ll bet he’s sick and tired of listening to me gush about how cute Leiland is and how much I love him.

And—I think I’m picking up what you’re putting down. Do you really, really think so? If so, that’d be awesome.

Love,

Markus St. Vincent

–

Dear Maggie,

Thank you.

Your letter really meant a lot to me. 

Sometimes that age old feeling of being ignored, disregarded, of being a non-person, that I doubt my right to have anything that I have—good friends, a good lord, a good life. But having you, someone that I really respect and admire and love, tell me that I am worthy of all of it gives me a sense of contentment that has been fleeting in the past. So thank you.

I think you are right, that I am worthy of love. And I will try to believe it, going forward. But I do not believe that I am worthy of loving Markus, or that I am the right person for him, or the person that he deserves to have. But I think I do hope that there is someone for me out there. I don’t think I will love them as much as I love Markus, but I think that me and that person will have a relationship that is fine, and I will be content with that.

I know it sounds sad, but truly. That is all I hope for.

With love,

Leiland.

–

Dear Leiland,

I don’t have much time to write to you, but I just wanted to say that we love you. We all love you. And even though you doubt your ability, or right, or whatever, to pursue your crush. Markus does love you too, I know it. 

You deserve to be happy. You deserve to enjoy your life. And I’m proud of you, for doing your best to escape from that well of isolation and loneliness and finding your own happiness in life. We’ll all be here to support you. We all want to see you be happy.

Love,

Maggie

–

Dear Markus,

That is the cutest letter I’ve ever read. And I have received letters like that, but they were much more pathetic and sad and kicked-puppy-esque. So I’m glad someone I know is happy and confidently in love.

And you know what? I see what you mean. Leiland is cute, in a pathetic, wet-kitten sorta way. The sort of way that makes you want to pick him up and just wrap him in a towel and take him home with you, but it also makes it really funny when he starts yowling as you give him a bath. I don’t know where this metaphor has gone, but you understand what I mean—you’re in love with the guy. And I wouldn’t question anyone who had a crush on Leiland. Even though he’s terrible at basically anything he tries, he does do some cool things, and even though I tease him for his incompetence, I really admire him for always picking himself back up. I mean, you know that—you were there for Leiland Jr’s naming.

It does make me happy that you’re clearly so head-over-heels for Leiland. He’s had a tough lot in life. He deserves to have an uncomplicated, loving relationship that just makes him feel good and wanted. And I really think you two can be happy together.

John knows, then? I’ll be able to commiserate with him over the fact that we have to listen to you mooning over Leiland. I bet he’ll appreciate finally having company in his misery. 

Listen. I can neither confirm nor deny, I’ve been sworn to secrecy. But now you know there’s a secret to be sworn to. 

Love,

Maggie

–

Dear John,

I heard from Markus that you also know his secret. He told me, too, that you’ve borne the brunt of his feelings recently. I don’t think any of us over here have heard about it until I asked him about it, and I want to make sure he has someone to confide in. And you’re a great listener, John—you’ll no doubt do a much better job listening to and dispensing advice to Markus than I could to Leiland. 

This letter is so short it seems almost a shame to send it alone, but I already wrote to you this week so it’ll stay short.

Your friend,

Maggie

–

Dear Mags,

Finally, confirmation that someone other than myself has heard of Markus’ feelings for the Pactwraith! Did he go on and tell you about how cute he finds Leiland? I’ve heard variations of that speech basically anytime Markus and I went drinking. I haven’t heard it much recently, because Leiland is hanging around, but now whenever Markus looks at Leiland I can’t help but think about all the things Markus has said to me about the man(?) (Is he a man? I’m not really clear what Leiland is anymore. I guess he’s a man in the sense that he’s male? Plus Markus refers to him as “my man” which is, to be perfectly honest, adorable.)

Honestly, the whole situation is pretty cute. They’re like eaglets going on their first flights with the opposite sex for the first time—all shy, longing glances when they think the other isn’t looking, touches that linger a little bit too long, blushes after one or both of them says something too revealing. They’re acting like this is their first love, but I know for certain that it’s not either of their first love. Is it too much to hope that this might be their last, though?

Ah, listen to me. I’m getting sentimental. Or maybe I’m in that post-breakup stage where emotions and love just really get to me. I’ve already cried over some romance novel that I got from the market.

Your friend,

John 

–

Dear Maggie,

HELL. YEAH.

Thank you so, so, much for confirming that. I mean, I had my hopes, but you can never really know, and I’ve been nervous about asking—we have such an easygoing friendship, me and Leiland, that it feels difficult to know when it’s okay to take the next step. 

I’m going to ask him to come camping with me. It’s something I used to do with my dad and brother a lot, and it’s something that I really enjoyed. I think it’ll be nice, to get Leiland away from the city, have some more intimate conversations, and maybe make a move while we’re alone. What do you think? John is no help—his only advice for how to make a move on Leiland is very…eagle-specific. He tells me I should impress Leiland with my flying abilities.

Love,

Markus

–

Dear Markus,

I did not confirm anything. I definitely did not betray the trust or break the letter of the promise I made to anyone. And if you knew what was good for you, you wouldn’t breathe a word of this to anyone, especially not any cute Pactwraiths who happen to be nearby.

Aw, it’s cute to know even someone oozing charisma like you is nervous about making a move on a person who is transparently head-over-heels for you. Or. Appears to be. Again, neither confirming nor denying.

I think a camping trip sounds like fun! Confess while enrobed in the comforting darkness. It’d be cute. Let me know how it goes, and I do mean every detail! But I bet it’ll go amazingly.

Love,

Maggie

–

Dear Maggie,

Thank you. And I promise you. I am so very happy. I don’t need much more. I want more, sure, but even if I don’t get it, I don’t need it. I have all that I need. 

And, honestly, even more than I need. Markus is taking me on a camping trip. I’m really excited about it. I know that going camping is a treasured memory from his childhood. I’m so honored that he wanted to show me this part of him and include me in an activity that he enjoyed and hasn’t enjoyed in a while. I’m not sure how well I’ll endure hiking and camping, but I’m certainly going to do my best to keep a cheerful countenance—I don’t want to ruin this experience for him!

With love,

Leiland.

–

Dear Lilith,

This is terribly embarrassing. But I need help. And advice, but mostly help.

I am currently in the town of Kree, and I need a lift home. I am safe, though incredibly uncomfortable and very much sick at heart. 

Before you ask about Markus, he is well, as far as I know—and the reason he can't pick me up is the same matter I need advice on. 

The only reason why I'm writing this in a letter is because it would be marginally less embarrassing than having to tell you in person. And I owe you an explanation at least, if I'm asking you to somehow send someone all the way out here to pick up a wayward Pactwraith. 

That being said, please don't tell anyone else about what I'm going to tell you. In fact, burn this letter afterwards–I don't want anyone but you to know what I'm about to tell you.

Markus and I left the Siren II to go camping. At night, we were sitting together, stargazing and watching the fire burn down, and then he kissed me.

I fully panicked. I got up and I think I said something stupid, because Markus asked "Go where?" and then I ran away into a nearby wood.

I ended up walking until it was morning, then I found a road and followed it to Kree. Markus probably knows that I'm here, so I've just been hiding in this inn room (I'm at the Armored Stallion) all day–I ended up giving my sword up as collateral, so please send some money as well so I can pay for my room and board. You can take it out of my personal funds. I don't know if I want Markus to follow me here or if I don't want to see him.

I feel like I've made a horrible mistake, but I can't tell how. I'm going to stay here until you send someone to pick me up, so please send someone quickly. I have room and board for now, though not the funds I need to get as rip-roaring drunk as I desire, but the longer this takes I think the angrier the innkeeper is going to get. Please send help quickly, and also clarity.

Yours,

Leiland.

P.S I am miserable right now.

–

Dear Leiland,

My dearest, I'm sending you this letter and a sack of gold in the care of one of John's friends. Ideally you'll be reading this letter on his back on your way home. Of course the eagle showing up in Kree asking for you would be indication enough that I received your letter and responded promptly, but I did not want to leave you in suspense on the ride back home, wondering about my reaction to your letter, so I am going to take some time to quickly jot my thoughts down in words.

My dear, let me assure you firstly that you have not made an unfixable blunder. While I cannot say that running away from a kiss was the wisest action, I also cannot say that kissing a friend with whom you have shared naught but friendship is the wisest action either, and unexpected actions often lead to more unexpected actions. 

I am somewhat lacking in context, so you will forgive me if I make some untrue assumptions. You can correct me when you reach home. 

In order to provide clarity, you must first clarify some things for me. On your way home, please spend some time thinking deeply about this: do you have feelings for Markus? Was the kiss unwelcome or merely unexpected? Have you ever suspected that he had feelings for you before? Would you be interested in pursuing a relationship with him going forward? Think about those questions carefully. Think about the best-case scenario, the worst-case scenario, and what you want out of this. Try not to worry so much about what Markus wants—we cannot read his mind, and to make assumptions about his feelings would do more harm than good. Think purely selfishly about yourself, and what you want.

We’ll discuss how you feel after you get home and rest. Until then,

Safe travels,

Lilith

–

Dear Lilith,

I fucked up. I can't tell you how, but I am in deep shit right now. I don't know if Leiland has told you yet, or what he's told you, but I'm not going to tell you what I've done because I don't think he'd want me to. 

But basically, I fucked up big time, and I need to apologize to Leiland. I'm enclosing a letter for you to give to him, if he wants to read it, but if he doesn't, could you please, please, please tell him the following things:

That I'm sorry. I am so, so, so, so sorry. 

There are no hard feelings at all on my end, and if he is willing we can completely forget about what I did and continue on as friends. 

If he doesn't want to or can't forget about it, I completely understand, too.

And if he needs space he can absolutely have it, as much and as long as he needs it for. 

But mostly please tell him that I'm sorry. 

Also, I'm sorry to you for putting you in this awkward position, and for not being able to tell you what this is all about. 

Yours,

MSV

–

Dear Leiland,

I'm sorry. It was stupid for me to spring that on you so suddenly and without any forewarning. I understand why you wanted to get out of there. I hope you were able to make your way somewhere safe after that.

I would love an opportunity to apologize to you in person, but please take care of yourself first–if you need space, take all the time you need. If you want to just forget about it, let me know and we can absolutely forget that it ever happened. If you can't forgive me, I understand.

If you want to ask me about something but don't want to contact me directly, you can ask Lilith to pass on a message. Please let me know if there is anything, absolutely anything, you need. 

Sincerely,

Markus

–

Dear Maggie,

I fucked up. 

It was going well. We took a small ship down to the land, and we went hiking north along the coast. The weather was pretty shit, actually, and I kept apologizing for the weather, but Leiland joked that I must have hired a druid to literally rain on our parade because I seemed so guilty about it. Now I’m wondering if the weather was a sign from the gods that I completely ignored. 

Leiland was not wearing his armor even though we were leaving the city. He said that it was way too bulky for hiking. I definitely was not complaining, especially because when it started raining his robe was sort of clinging to him.

You know what, I should stop there. 

We ended up hiking through a little forest, where it wasn’t so wet, and had our lunch there. It stopped raining at mid-afternoon, and the ground was still a little damp when we stopped to make camp, but we set up our tent and our campfire and we had a hot dinner and some tea. He really liked the tea, he looked so happy when he drank it, it was adorable. It got dark pretty quickly, and the stars came out. We started talking about how Lilith ate some of the stars, and I was flirting with him, and he was really receptive to it, or so I thought. He said that I was handsome and that it was a shame that I wore my mask, but that he was glad because people would start fawning over me and he’d get jealous. By this point I was super nervous, because I was thinking this was my chance, you know? It’s a beautiful night, we’re alone, the armor and the mask are completely gone. I kept getting really tongue-tied every time I looked at him, and I thought that I would never be able to spit it out if he kept looking at me like that.

And then I kissed him.

That turned out to be the biggest mistake of my life. He froze up. As soon as he did I pulled away, and he was staring at me with big eyes. Then, he got up and said, “I need to go.”

We were in the middle of nowhere, and I was confused and nervous, and so I asked him, “Go where?” I had no idea what he was talking about.

And then he ran off. 

Literally, just turned on his heel and ran into the woods. And it only hit me then how badly I fucked up. I wanted to go after him, and keep thinking that I should have. But then what would I have done? Probably apologize. But also, I had already fucked up a lot by kissing him out of nowhere like that. And doing it alone on a camping trip in the middle of nowhere was a dumb idea too. So I decided to just stay where I was. I thought that he might come back in the middle of the night, but he didn’t. Going by the geography, I’m pretty sure that the nearest town, and the only town anywhere nearby, is Kree. I don’t know what he has on him. He doesn’t have his armor, but I’m pretty sure he has his sword. So not only am I really, really regretting it, I’m also worried for him. I know he can take care of himself, but he’s still alone in a country that he barely knows with no armor and not much on him. One of the servants noticed me coming home distraught and offered to scry on him, but I refused—I’m not going to trod on his boundaries more than I already have.

If you can, can you please either go or send someone to go find him? I’m sending my fastest dove, but it’s already been a day and I’m worried and furious with myself. I haven’t been able to sit still and I barely got a wink of sleep. 

Love,

MSV

–

Dearest Markus,

Letter received. I’ll make sure to pass on the message.

Don’t fret, everything will be okay.

XOXO Lilith

–

Dear Maggie, 

I heard from Markus that things went badly with Leiland. I’m looking after Markus, but please write me back and tell me how the other one’s doing. That man worries me sometimes.

Your friend,

John

–

Dear Markus,

To be perfectly honest with you. That sounds really, really bad. I’m en route to Kree right now to see if I can find him.

Love,

M

–

Dear Markus,

In Kree. Leiland’s gone. Going back home to tell everyone. Try not to worry. We’ll find him.

M

–

Dear Markus,

Leiland is already at home. 

I’m super sorry for scaring you. It turns out that Leiland wrote to Lilith while he was in Kree, and she sent an eagle to go pick him up.

I am going to be honest—he’s pretty distraught. But it’s not because he doesn’t like you or doesn’t like what happened, it’s the opposite. I can’t tell you any more than that, I think it’s a conversation you and Leiland need to have. But don’t worry too much. You two will have that conversation, once Leiland sorts his feelings out.

You and I know Leiland. We both know what he’s like. Just, if don’t think you’re capable of taking good care of his heart and being there for him when he’s having his moments. I don’t really know how to put this. Just that, if you think there’s a slim possibility that you might have to walk away later because he gets to be too much for you, then please have that realization now and not later. I don’t want him to get his heart crushed later down the line. So please promise me, that if two are going to date, you’re really, truly committing to being there for him forever. He’s a good man, and he needs to work on himself, but he also needs people who will be there with him while he works on himself.

Love,

Maggie

–

Dear Maggie,

Thank you for letting me know. I was scared shitless when he wasn’t in Kree. But I’m glad to hear that that he contacted Lilith and got picked up. 

Please look after him. I’m hoping for the best but prepared for the worst. 

Yes. I absolutely am. I love him and I want to be there for him. No matter if it’s as a friend or as a lover, I want to be with him forever.

Love,

MSV

–

Dear John,

Leiland is home now. When he got home, he went straight to his room and showered and slept for a really long time.

This morning, I left Leiland Jr. with my handmaidens, and me and Lilith went up to his room and knocked on the door. He called us in, and we found him sitting up on the bed. He looked terrible and miserable, with all of his blankets wrapped around himself like a cocoon. 

He just said, “I need advice. I messed up.”

Lilith immediately said, “No, no, you didn’t mess up, you can fix things still. But you need to be honest with us, with Markus, and most importantly yourself.”

Leiland nodded, and so Lilith said, “Tell me about the circumstances of the kiss.” Lilith is a goddess. She was doing such a good job of keeping Leiland grounded. I just mostly sat there and did my best not to look as worried as I was.

Leiland shrugged and said it was like he wrote in the letter. 

Lilith asked if the kiss was sudden, and Leiland disappeared even deeper into the blankets. And he told her that he had been “sort of flirting with Markus,” but it was “just banter” and he didn’t think anything would come of it. 

Lilith asked him if flirting for him meant friendship, or if he meant it.

Leiland told her that, for her, he always means it. And then he started rambling about how he can’t resist flirting with Markus because he really, really likes him. And that he knows that it was stupid of him, but he simply can’t ever resist. 

Then Lilith said that it wasn’t stupid of him, he was expressing his interest in someone that he liked by flirting. And that a kiss was an indication that the other party noticed the interest and reciprocated.

Leiland got really upset by that. He said that he never thought that Markus would like him back, let alone would be interested in kissing him. And that he was just so overwhelmed by this idea that Markus might actually be interested in him he didn’t know what to do, and just ran away, and now he ruined things again.

Lilith asked him if he didn’t want to kiss Markus. Leiland then took off his blankets so he could glare at her, and said that of course he wanted to kiss Markus. Back then and even now.  And he repeated that he ruined things between them by running away from the kiss. 

Lilith then assured him that he didn’t ruin things permanently. And that, if he liked Markus back and was willing to take things up a notch, he should tell Markus immediately, and not leave Markus in flux.

Leiland dithered for a while. He said that he didn’t know if he’d be good enough to be in a relationship with Markus, and that maybe that they should just forget about it so Markus could find someone better. 

That’s when I got really annoyed at him. I may have yelled at him a little. I told him that Markus loves him, and he loves Markus, and that Markus chose him and wanted him. And that he shouldn’t reject Markus because he thinks Markus can do better, he would just end up breaking Markus’ heart for no reason other than his insecurities. 

Then, Lilith pulled out a letter and gave it to Leiland. I don’t know what that letter said, but I guess it must have been from Markus. 

Leiland read it, and sighed very heavily. He asked Lilith if she thought Markus regretted the kiss. 

Lilith replied, “I think he only regrets the distress it brought you. If you could write to him and tell him that it didn’t distress you at all, I think that it’ll do much to heal his wounded soul.”

Leiland thought about it for even longer. I asked him if he wanted a relationship with Markus. I told him to be selfish, because Markus was selfish, too, and Markus had decided that he wanted Leiland. 

Leiland sighed and said that he did. And that he wished he didn’t run away from the kiss. 

Lilith told him to write to Markus, and then we left his room.

So, yeah. Leiland is really upset, but I think things are going to be okay.

I also told him you were worried about him, and he looked surprised and flattered. Then I told him that we were all worried about him. He kept that surprised and flattered expression on his face, and then he said thank you. Then, Lilith and I hugged him, we told him we loved him, and after that we left.

Love,

Maggie

–

Dear Markus,

I hope that you are well. I read your apology, and I wish to apologize, too, for running away from you afterwards. I am sorry. 

To tell you the truth, I did not expect that to ever happen. I never thought there was any possibility that you might return my feelings, let alone thought that there could be a chance you might want to have something between us that is more than mere friendship.

And, to be clear, it was not unwelcome, just unexpected. It is very good of you to want to apologize, but there is nothing to apologize for. I was the one who made the mistake of running away instead of talking things out with you. I was so surprised and overwhelmed and I didn’t know what to do, so I just ran. And immediately I knew that I had fucked up. But I didn’t know what I wanted (well, I did know what I wanted, I just didn’t know if it was within my rights to want it) so I hid from you like a coward while I tried to figure out what to do.

After much counsel from good friends, I have gathered enough courage to be honest with you. I really, really like you, Markus. Not only within the bounds of friendship, but more, too. I would say that love you, and I’ve been in love with you for quite some time now. But I didn’t think that we would ever be together, and I was and am well and truly content to just be friends. 

But if you are open to being more than friends, then I would be over the moon. I want to be your partner, your lover, whatever you want to call it. If that’s not what you want, or if you are just interested in sex, then that’s okay, too, I can accept that. But if you are okay with having me, the stupid idiot that I am, then I would be the happiest wraith unalive.

But no matter what you write back, I will always be,

Your friend,

Leiland.

–

Dear Leiland,

I appreciate you saying that I have nothing to apologize for, but I do. It was truly unfair of me to spring a kiss onto you unexpectedly without asking for permission. And I am really sorry for surprising you with my feelings without easing you into it. You don’t need to be sorry, either. I know you just needed some space after such a large surprise. 

You are an idiot, if you thought that you never had a chance with me. You are a wonderful guy. I love spending time with you. You make me laugh. You listen to me when I’m talking nonsense about shit you don’t care about. I want to impress you, I want to make you smile, I want to make your eyes light up with happiness or wonder or interest. I am so absolutely stupid over you, it drives me insane. Also, you’re simultaneously adorable and hot as fuck, but we can talk about that part later.

And I am so, insanely happy that you like me back. I reread that part of your letter over and over and over again, though your insecurity and hesitation I can still sense even after everything makes my heart ache. I’ll make my feelings perfectly clear, so that there’s no room for you to wonder.

I love you. 

And I want to be more than just friends, and more than friends-with-benefits or whatever. I want to be with you. I want us to be together. I want you. And whenever you’re ready, I’ll fly the Siren II to Gorgar to meet you, and I can apologize to you and tell you how much I love you in person. 

Yours always,

Markus St. Vincent

–

Dear Markus,

Just like how you don’t think I have anything to apologize for (you are wrong) I don’t think you have anything to apologize for (I am right). But thank you for extending your understanding towards me and my foolish behavior.

I will admit that your letter was rather overwhelming for me to read. But I suppose I must get used to hearing you say such sweet words, since we are to be lovers.

I am so very happy. I don’t think I have been ever so happy in my life and unlife. And it is now one of my grand purposes in unlife to make you even just half as happy as I am in this moment.

Please come to me immediately. I want to see you again.

Yours always, 

Leiland.

P.S. This is the first real, proper love letter I have ever written. And if you are wondering about the improper love letters I have written—go reread my other letters to you.