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It always surprised Kate how gentle America was. Kate had seen her crush so many things with her bare fists, and yet when she used those same hands to touch her it was always soft, always sweet. America knew how strong she was; of course she did. Kate wondered if it was hard for her to be as gentle as she was when they were together. She always meant to ask, but as soon as they started touching the question slipped her mind.
It wasn’t just her hands though, America was gentle with her mouth too. She never left marks. Not unless Kate asked her to, and some times Kate did ask. She was rich with her tongue and light with her teeth and left sticky wet trails with all of her kisses. Afterwards the air on her wet skin always made Kate prickle up with goosebumps in the best way possible.
America loved to kiss. Not usually on the lips but everywhere else. Kate knew the pleasure of lips on her ears, and neck, her breasts, her throat. She’d had a few guys go down on her, but most didn’t bother. America, though, he wanted to taste everything.
America liked to do all kinds of things, really. Once she nuzzled the underside of Kate’s foot and kissed until Kate was in a fit of giggles. She licked between her toes like it actually tasted good. Kate didn’t like that. It made her feet feel squishy afterwards, and weird. America never did it again, even if sometimes it looked like she wanted to, and Kate couldn’t have been more thankful for that. Thankful to have someone who stopped when Kate told them to stop.
Tonight America kissed the inside of Kate’s elbows and the tips of each finger. She kissed Kate’s wrists and the palm of her hand. Kate stroked her cheek and encouraged her to do more. It it didn’t hurt, it made her feel good, so why not continue? For some reason America kissed all the way up her arm, nuzzling her face into Kate’s armpit, kissing and licking there too. It tickled, and it felt weird but good at the same time and Kate was laughing by the time she said ‘stop’. America did, too, she always stopped.
“I like licking there.” America told her.
Kate felt a little self conscious about it. What if she hadn’t shaved well enough and there was still stubble? What if it tasted sour? “Really?”
“Can I try again?”
Kate’s heart swelled up, all warm and fond that America actually asked, and she figured it wouldn’t hurt to try. She nodded her head and America went in for a second pass. Kate even lifted her arm, stretching it up to rest against the pillows behind her head. America made a soft noise of appreciation at the access she’d be given and returned her face to Kate’s underarm. She licked again, with the whole flat of her tongue, like a kid with an ice cream cone and Kate couldn’t help but laugh. It wasn’t so bad. Most importantly, it didn't hurt.
America spent a long time there, enjoying herself. Kate decided it was something she could get used to. America did so much for her, it was just one small thing she could allow in return. When she was done under Kate’s arm America buried her face in Kate’s hair. She murmured that it smelled good, and kissed her scalp. Her breath felt like it was tickling all over Kate’s head.
America asked politely for Kate to turn over, a soft whisper in her ear. She kissed down Kate’s back, stopping to press her lips against each and every vertebrae of her spine. It was kind of sloppy, but it felt good. No one had ever kissed the whole way down her back before. America’s hands were soft and they laid flat across Kate’s shoulder blades, slowly sliding down her pale skin as she trailed her kisses lower and lower. Kate buried her face in the pillows, closing her eyes. Enjoying. She hardly realized that America’s hands were on her ass until her cheeks were being pulled apart.
“No.” Kate sat up, clutching the sheets, trying to clench tight like that would stop someone as strong as America.
“It’s okay, baby.” America told her. She let her hands slide to Kate’s hips instead because she knew Kate didn’t mind that. “I just wanted to taste you.”
“Not there.” Kate told her.
It felt kind of stupid to get so upset about it. She knew America wasn’t going to hurt her, but all of a sudden it was like she could feel the concrete beneath her knees and the bricks that her face had been pushed against. She could feel hands bruising her. She could feel her clothes being ripped off. She could feel the blood. She felt violated, and hurt, and alone all over again.
“Okay,” America murmured, and kissed the small of her back again. “Just relax. Let go of the sheets.”
Kate didn’t feel safe just yet but as soon as she realized how tight her fists were she let go. She tried to relax, but it was so much easier said than done.
“Can you just… Can you hold me?” She asked.
America was already moving to do just that. She crawled up the mattress and settled her head among the pillows, nuzzling gentle into Kate’s neck. Kate could feel America’s body settling in behind her, forming against her own, slotting into place; the big spoon to her little one. America wrapped an arm, casually, around Kate’s middle. Kate reached down to hold on to her hand.
“Do you want to talk about it?” America asked.
She knew the story. Everyone knew the story. Jessica Jones had been polite and delicate with the subject, but the whole thing was in the papers and sometimes it felt like everyone knew.
“Not right now.” Kate decided. She felt like she had just relived it a second ago, she didn’t want to dredge it all up.
“We can try again some other time. Whenever you want to, if you do want to.” America decided. Sometimes she made executive decisions like that. Kate didn’t like anyone else making decisions about her body, but America always knew just how to phrase it. She knew how to make it all still be Kate’s choice.
“I’m sorry.” Kate said, feeling stupid for stopping. America was so sweet to her, so loving, so gentle. She never got to have any fun, she was always just awaiting Kate’s every whim. At least, that’s how it felt.
“Don’t be sorry.” America chided her. “I get to do this all over again another day, so I’m not complaining.” She sounded so genuine. So pleased.
“It’s hard to believe you’re the same person I saw clobbering skrulls with her bare fist.” Kate pointed out, only half teasing.
“Don’t want to clobber you, princess. Just want to make you feel safe.”
She did. She made Kate feel safer than she’d ever felt before. Not because America was fierce and ferocious and could slay a man with her hands. America made her feel safe because she respected Kate’s boundaries; she was kind and understanding and always knew when to stop. There was nothing better.