Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

It was a beautiful day outside on the Surface… birds were singing… flowers were blooming… it was days like these, Skeletons like them… were glad they didn’t have allergies. As it was, Horror happily fed the chickens while trying not to stare too hard at his larger Mate. Crop was unfairly good looking, especially when he had his muscular green ecto body summoned to give him a boost in strength and some added protection to his bones. At the moment he was carrying the broken down tractor out of the fields to get fixed.

Crop tried not to smirk as he carried the old tractor to the repair barn that he kept all his tools and spare parts in. He knew Horror was watching his every move with that big, pretty red eye of his. Even better was the faint blush he could see on the recovering Monster’s cheekbones. Every bit of magic his Sweetpea could manage, especially without trying, meant he was getting healthier. The poor Skeleton Monster was nothing but bones when they met a few years back.

Yes… Skeleton Monsters were supposed to be that way rather than fleshy like most species of Monsters, but they still tended to have an invisible buffer of magic to protect them. That’s why some of his alternates looked like they had a belly when they were covered in clothing even when they didn’t have an ecto body summoned. When he first saw Horror though, his clothing hung off of him much like if someone threw clothes on one of those ‘medical skeletons’ the Humans had. Not to mention how thin, brittle and greyed his bones looked and how watery the magic holding his bones together was.

Between the lack of food, the lack of magic due to that lack of food, and the horrible injury he sustained… what little magic he had left was used to just keep him alive and in one piece. Ever since then Crop worked hard at fattening him up to a much healthier weight with plenty of magic heavy foods to help him get some of it back. His bones were a much healthier color now and nowhere as brittle as they were when they first met. They weren’t completely back to normal, but it was hard to say if they ever would at this point.

It was helpful that all Crop had to do to make Monster food was take a handful of seeds and such and infuse his magic in them before planting to get magic rich fruits and veggies. He was still a ‘Non-Swap Sans’ type so it was quicker and easier than doing it after the fact. Things also grew much faster when he did that and it didn’t go bad anywhere near as fast as ‘normal’ ones did.

Neither of them cared if he would ever get back to ‘normal’ for a Skeleton of his size, but just being able to have a small buffer of magic protecting him and have the most basic of things like summoning a tongue and blushing were a big deal. It took a long time but it was worth the wait… just seeing the look on his Sweetpea’s face when he first fully tasted his home cooking using an ecto tongue. For now he could only summon it for a short period of time but at least he could keep it up long enough to slowly savor a whole meal. Some nice long kisses were also lovely… with or without a tongue.

Once in the barn, he set the old tractor down to tinker with later… mebby he’d even get Red to take a look at it with him sometime after they ate. Speaking of, he checked the time on his old clunker of a phone before heading back to the chicken coop. He could hear the girls clucking and squawking to let everyone know that Horror wasn’t paying enough attention to them. They got very offended if you were in their fenced in area and didn’t give them enough skritches.

Horror ‘s smile grew as he spotted his Lambchop heading back his way from the repair barn. He had to make sure he separated the barns in his head since the one for animals was a different one now. At one point they needed more room in it for the animals after getting more of them, that and it needed better heating… especially in the winter. The old barn just needed too much repair work and modifications so it was easier and less expensive to just build a newer one to fit their needs.

The old one was still useable and worked great for keeping some of the larger equipment out of the elements. Especially when they needed repairs and some of the animals liked trying to ‘help’ or thought screws were something edible. Also they didn’t have to worry about fixing the heating when it was only needed to run enough to keep things from freezing.

Once he got close enough, Crop leaned over to give Horror a quick skele-kiss before pointing at the noisy chickens. “…better give ‘em some ‘ttention ‘fore they get mad atcha, sweetpea…” He wasn’t sure if his love was just distracted by him or if it was one of those days where he had trouble staying focused on what he was doing or about to do. At least those days were fewer and further between… though he had a feeling those days would never go away completely. Didn’t matter one way or the other, he loved him just the way he was.

Looking down at the very vocal chickens at his feet, he blushed again before mumbling out “…s’rry…” while leaning down to ply the plump balls of feathers with skritches. He glanced at the ground and saw that there was plenty of feed out for them. That meant they weren’t hungry, just wanted attention that he didn’t give them fast enough. They were spoiled brats sometimes but he loved them the most out of all the animals on the farm.

The two of them couldn’t help but give the Chickens all fun names like Nuggie, Tendie, Pattie, Noodles, Dumplin’, and Pot-Pie. Most of the animals, much to both of their brothers dismay, had silly or punny names such as Mootilda, Moodonna, and Moozzarella for their dairy cows. Some other examples were the names Hamlet and Hamilton for their two potbellied pigs. It actually helped Horror remember them all better like that than if they all had ‘normal’ names.

“…’m gonna go wash up first, sweetpea… i’ll letcha know when ‘m done so you c’n get yer turn… don’ f’get we have that picnic date thing t’day…” With that, he headed to the farmhouse to get cleaned up… he knew Horror didn’t mind him being a bit dirty or sweaty, but their guests might not have the same opinion. At least he still had plenty of time to finish getting the food ready for their picnic since he made sure the old outdoor grill was clean and ready yesterday.

Crop knew Horror didn’t mind eating veggies… food was food to him… but their friends that were coming to have a double date picnic with them preferred a less healthy meal. Granted there were ways to add some healthy things like adding fresh thick sliced t’maters or other veggies on top of the grilled burgers. The thick cut fries couldn’t be any fresher than making them from ‘taters harvested from the field early this morning. He had them cut and soaking as soon as he got them back to the house so they’d be ready to be dried when he finished his tasks for the day. Then he could season them and get them in the oven when it was almost time for his guests to arrive.

Even the ketchup was made from scratch and plenty of it since three out of four of them would be using it. It was his own special recipe that he’d perfected over the years using only the best ‘maters in his field. He reluctantly bought a bottle of mustard from the store the last time he was in town as backup in case his first attempt at making his own failed. Considering he couldn’t stomach the stuff he had no way of knowing how it came out until his one guest tried it.

He also had a selection of healthy sandwiches and sides that he hoped the other two would at least try. Good thing even leftovers using Crop’s crops… heh… would keep a long time. He knew their two guests would’ve rather gone to his Grillby’s but Horror still had trouble around crowds and loud people. They were fine with it being an outdoor picnic as long as they could stay long enough to do some stargazing. ‘FarmTale’, as his world was called, didn’t have issues with light pollution from big cities or having the view blocked by a lot of tall trees when you did get away from it.

They had big open fields with nothing blocking the stars unless it was cloudy and it wasn’t overly hot or cold out now. He knew it wasn’t gonna be cloudy today or tonight since he’d been on the surface his whole life and knew how to tell what the weather was gonna do. He always had plenty of time to get the animals somewhere safe before anything hit. It was still strange to think most… worlds? AUs? had the Monster race trapped under a mountain and some never saw the sky until they got set free. There were even some worlds that were still trapped and might never get a chance to see it at all.

Crop never had a head for science… unless you counted agricultural science. It seemed most of his alternates… or his bro’s with those Swap versions… were real smart with building complicated machines or figurin’ out fancy science stuff. Because of them, there were more and more AUs that could visit each other and hang out or help each other out. Like in the case of Horror’s where they were trapped Underground and suffering through a famine that kept getting worse.

The ‘HorrorTale’ folks that were safe to bring to FarmTale… as in the ones that wouldn’t attack everything that moved thinking it was food… were relocated to a host family. If they could they matched them up with their alternates who’d personally know how to help make their recovery faster. For example a fleshier Monster wouldn’t have a clue if a Skeleton Monster was eating enough.

For the ones that were too feral to be safely brought here, all the Monster run farms sent food to them since it wasn’t fair to let them starve. There were even a few cases where one of them was brought to FarmTale much later due to the steady food source bringing them back to their senses. Unfortunately there were quite a few that were too far gone to ever be able to be anything but feral beasts looking for their next meal. No matter who or what it was.

It didn’t matter if the… CORE? was fixed or not right away… the soil had gone without magic or nutrients for so long, no amount of magic and farming knowhow would be able to get anything growing there for a very very long time. Definitely not enough to support the Monsters trapped there let alone them living long enough to get the chance to eat it when it did. For the sake of those still there, there would be an attempt to get it running, but they didn’t have high hopes for it helping anytime in the near future.

His Sweetpea and his brother had refused to come with the first group as they worried about if they were actually gonna get the food that was promised or not. It was only after the first month of constant food distribution that they realized it wasn’t a trick or them going delusional with hunger. Crop also understood the need to make sure the Monsters of Snowdin actually got the food without it being stolen and horded by ‘The Empress’ for New Home. There was no reason for that since they all got plenty to last them just in case they were late or something happened.

FarmTale didn’t have such a thing as a Queen or King or Empress… they all worked together and helped each other out if they needed it. It was a hard decision whether it was safer to leave Empress Undyne there or bring her here considering she wasn’t too mentally stable. At one point he thought he heard someone say that she refused to leave or she thought she didn’t deserve to leave. All he cared was that her and her guards stayed as far away from Horror and his bother as possible. Crop too since he didn’t doubt she’d get a chewin’ out by his bovine looking Blasters if they crossed paths.

Once Horror decided the girls got more than enough skritches, he carefully made his way out of the coop without letting any of the chickens sneak out. Once inside the farmhouse, he made his way to the bathroom after seeing Crop doing something in the kitchen. At least they didn’t have to fight for the shower today since both their bros were visiting… someone today. He couldn’t remember who but wasn’t worried about checking his notes to make sure they were safe. He remembered that his bro was happy and excited to visit someone and Crops’ bro was with him so that was good enough for him. His bro was so much happier since getting his teeth fixed and being able to see now with his glasses.

With all his loved ones safe and well fed, he was a lot less overprotective than he used to be… as long as they weren’t near a certain Fish Monster. The one from here was… okay… to be near for a little bit but everyone understood if he got a little twitchy around her sometimes. She didn’t get offended and tried not to get too close just in case he got mixed up for a moment. She was well informed of what her alternate had done to everyone, especially the Skeleton brothers and their hometown. She learned pretty fast not to take any angry looks or comments from HorrorTale Monsters personally.

Once everything was prepped and ready the two of them headed over to where they were planning to have the picnic. While Crop started the grill, Horror spread out the large picnic blanket and double checked the list of what they needed. Seeing half a dozen bottles of homemade ketchup, he chuckled. “…think ‘dere… ‘nough ke’chup… lambchop?” He had a feeling there was more still back at the house just in case they went though it faster than expected.

“…never too much for you, sweetpea~” Crop said with a wink and a blown kiss. Thankfully he didn’t startle easily and wasn’t in the middle of flipping a burger when a different voice piped up behind them. It also helped that he was used to shortcut induced shenanigans at this point after meeting so many other ‘hims’ or Swaps of his bro.

“…gaaaaay… good thing we ain’t that gross wit’ petnames, right sweetheart?” Red chuckled as he saw Sans blow him a kiss with his middle phalange. He flipped him back with a sharky grin before putting quiche, apostrophe dogs and buns next to the rest of the grub. He still didn’t get why Horror went with that name but whatever… not the first Sans to go by the name of their AU. Most Sans’ were pretty lazy when they had to change their names once outside their home AU, himself included. At least the burgs smelled good and knowing these two there’d be plenty of food to choose from.

Sans rolled his eyelights at Red before turning back to their hosts “…thanks for invitin’ us boneheads… m’glad i don’t gotta check up on most of you guys anymore… i can just visit to ketchup…” He picked up a bottle of ketchup and took a hearty swig right after. As much as he loved Grillby’s special blend… granted he got it infused with alcohol if he was drinking it… Crop’s version really hit the spot. There was a running joke at one point that he only visited for the ketchup.

The early days of the HorrorTale Monsters coming to FarmTale were stressful… wanting to hope that things went well, but knowing there was a long road ahead. They really didn’t wanna have to send anyone back to that hellhole for ‘bad repeat behavior’… as in eating and/or attacking what was off limits. People, pets, farm animals that weren’t for eating like dairy cows or egg laying chickens, etc. They all got three chances before they got sent back… unless it resulted in a Monster Dusting or killing a Human… if that happened they were instantly banned and sent back.

Thankfully the ones that got strikes against them only had it happen once or twice and they tended to regret it when they realized what they did and remembered why they didn’t need to do that anymore. Eventually everyone got used to what to watch for and had a better system for who was and wasn’t safe to bring here. There were so many close calls in the early days, but so far none of the HorrorTale Monsters got hit with the insta-ban.

It also helped that they made sure none of the Snowdin residents came anywhere near sushi-face. Sans started calling ‘Empress Undyne’ that after he noticed that when he was talking to Horror, he had a not so subtle twitch whenever anyone said her name. Once he explained and showed pictures of what sushi was to the confused Monster, he couldn’t help but smile at the wheezing laughter that came from the normally scowling Monster. After that they became pals… it was much better than the glaring and mistrust he used to get for being a ‘better version of him before things went bad’.

Once Crop felt he cooked up enough ‘burgs and ‘dogs, he plated them up and set them with the rest of the spread. “…a’right folks, time t’dig in.” As everyone grabbed up big platefuls of food, he remembered the one condiment he had to warn about. “…now i know ya like yer mustard, red, but i tried t’make m’own like i do with th’ ketchup. dunno if it came out decent or not so y’might wanna taste test it b’fore ya cover anything with it… if ya dun like it i got the store kind just in case.” He grinned at the flash of pleasant surprise he saw on Red’s face before he tried to hide it.

While Sansy was enjoying the homemade ketchup, Red took a taste of the attempt at his own favorite condiment. “…eh… not bad fer yer first try, veggie boy… guess ya mustard did somethin’ right…” He decided to use both kinds on his ‘burg and fries to give it a little more punch… the guy went to the trouble of makin’ somethin’ that only he would use so he was gonna use it even if he didn’t like it dammit. Good thing it wasn’t too bad and just needed a little tweaking.

He might have t’save a little for Fellby t’try so he could hopefully give him some ideas to pass along on how to make it better. He wasn’t about t’ask him for his secret recipe or nothin’, stingy bastard would never agree t’somethin’ like that no matter how much G got thrown at ‘im. Hopefully if he made sure to tell him it wouldn’t be made to sell it might help.

Crop shook his head as he watched the sharp toothed Skelly use both his and the store bought mustard. At least the one he made wasn’t going to waste and if there was any left he’d make sure Red took it with him. Though knowing how much of his ketchup they went through he had a feeling there wouldn’t be any leftovers of it. He was surprised that their guests did put some of the grilled veggies on the ‘burgs and not just ate them plain. The thick slices of cheese he melted on them helped too. Sadly it wasn’t made by him but at least it was by one of his neighbors that had a dairy farm and was happy to trade for some of his veggies.

Not that he hated getting store bought foodstuffs, but he and his neighbors prided on being as self-sufficient as they could and traded with each other for what they didn’t have. That and it could take all day to go into town and back which meant an unproductive day. The only day most Monster owned or run farms even did that was the first Saturday of every month when there was a farmer’s market set up in the middle of town for visitors to buy their goods.

Horror tended to stay home with the animals which helped since they needed fed and tended to considering he had to leave extra early to get there in time. He also knew it was due to his Sweetpea not wanting to be around so many noisy people. It varied on if either of their bros came along or stayed with Horror, but usually at least one of them went with him. It made getting set up faster and they could take turns manning the stall and checking out what everyone was selling. The farms were all spread out around the town so some of the farms were too far out on the other side for him to get to. If there was something that someone needed they could also request it to be brought for them next time.

It was a good thing that he focused on produce along with a small amount of milk and eggs… neither he nor his Mate could stand to harm their animals. He’d much rather trade for any meat products that another farmer already processed. Considering how much his guests were enjoying the burgers, they were glad for that too… that and the hearty beef stew that he always made when it got colder out. He liked to joke that most of his fields were nothing but ‘maters and ‘taters… had to keep him and his Sweatpea supplied with ketchup and ‘taters seemed t’have a million uses.

After finishing off his second loaded burger, Red licked the remnants off his phalanges before finally saying something. “…ya outdone yerself again… it ain’t a grillby’s ‘burg, but it’s th’best alternate i ever ate.” He was making sure he didn’t bring up the looks Crop and Horror were giving each other while they ate. His AU had a similar thing with giving food, especially something you made, to someone. He didn’t miss that everyone helped themselves, but Crop made sure to fill up a plate for his Mate. He still remembered the scandalized looks his own bro had the first time Classic Paps offered the two of them some of his ‘friendship spaghetti’.

Sansy was pissed thinkin’ he and his bro were bein’ mean or rude to the creampuff. Red couldn’t help but crack up laughing after eventually realizing that wasn’t a thing in most AUs and more of a Fell type Universe thing. Everyone calmed down about it when they finally got on the same page that it was all a cultural misunderstanding. It was surprising when he found out it wasn’t just Fell types and there were exceptions like with those two lovebirds. At least Sansy was payin’ attention for once and picked up on it too. Good thing he had a thick cut fry loaded with ketchup to shove in his Mate’s mouth for distraction just in case he ran his mouth before thinkin’ again.

Sans thought it was interesting that the food giving thing most Fell types sometimes expanded to some non-Fell Aus too. If he never experienced the debacle of the first time his bro tried to offer food to Red and Edge and eventually found out it was a ‘thing’ in their culture, he prob’ly wouldn’t’ve realized. At least later it ended up hilarious to all of them once they realized what was going on and they weren’t actually being jerks. At least no more than usual at the time.

Now that he was wise on that, he could pick up the little things he normally would’ve missed, like the fact that everyone served themselves and no actual food…condiments and drinks didn’t really count… was handed directly to anyone except Crop to Horror. The cute little blushes on both of their cheekbones helped clue him in too. Those two were perfect together and nobody could tell him otherwise. Now him and Red… it wasn’t unusual for people to question them being together and depending on how they asked, Red tended to intimidate them enough to make them leave.

At least Sans knew not to point out the food thing when he saw it… giving a little hint to Red that he did notice it was fun though. Especially when it made Red feed him something to keep him quiet… sometimes if he was lucky he got a little blush out him from it. Not that he’d say anything anyway, but with Red sometimes things had to be subtle or hidden as something else. Old habits were hard to break, especially from the more edgy or survival based AUs. Red had two modes… being subtle and hiding that Sans was special to him or being loud and bragging about them being Mates.

It depended on who was nearby and how they might take it… whether it was strangers… especially Humans… Fell types, Non-Fells, friends, family or close acquaintances. It was all worth it when no-one else was around and he got to have a cuddle starved, secret softie, romantic Red all to himself. That and Red totally figured Sans wouldn’t tell anyone about that with the reasoning that nobody would believe him. Joke is, half of their friends knew anyway but he wasn’t telling.

Also when it came to their bros, they picked up on that a long time ago but felt it was polite to act like they didn’t have a clue on any of it. Letting a Sans be sneaky… or think they were being sneaky… was more entertaining than a Sans that was sad they were easily and quickly found out.

At least they didn’t have to worry about leftovers or saving room for desert since Red and Sans were staying for a while to do some stargazing. Anything left over could be eaten later if any of them got hungry and dessert would be shortly before they went to do the stargazing so there was plenty of time to ‘make room’ in their non-existent stomachs.

Seeing that no one was going back for thirds and most of the food was gone, Crop stretched his arms and back a moment before starting to clean up. “…lookin’ like y’all are done eatin’ so ’m gonna pack up what’s left so th’ critters don’ get to it.” They didn’t need to find any ants hiding in the food later or some other vermin doin’ a snatch and run.

Sans and Red at least tried to help pick up though they were both about ready to take a food coma nap from eating so much magic heavy food in one shot. Farmtale Monsters tended to make their food that way anyway and when they started feeding those who were severely magic starved, they only upped the amount. It was still kept up even now since though it was slow, there were still noticeable differences and improvements to their magical and physical health.

Once all the food was put away, they decided to hang out on the overly large porch for a bit. He and his Sweetpea took the one porch swing with the other two pretty much curled up together on the other. “…think i’ll lettuce all take a short nap after that meal…” It didn’t take long for his guests to pass out for a short and he didn’t mind one bit if someone leaned against him and did the same.

Next thing Crop knew, he woke up from Horror shifting next to him as he just woke up from his own nap. He didn’t even realize he dozed off, though he did wake up extra early and got his morning chores done ahead of schedule… or as much as he could with a broken down tractor. Speakin’ of… he glanced over and spotted a less familiar looking pair of red eyelights blearily looking around. “…i ferget sometimes what our food does t’those that don’ need the high magic in it like us folks that do a ton a’ physical labor or are recoverin’ like m’sweetpea.”

Carefully getting untangled from Sansy’s koala grip and sitting up, Red rubbed his face and tried to wake up more. “…worth it though… love m’bro’s cookin’ when we visit but he tends t’get a bit fancy… you guys hit the spot with th’comfort food… even if ya think yer tryin’ t’sneak in the healthy stuff like he does.” He grinned at the farmer before getting up to stretch the kink outta his back.

“…if ya feelin’ up to it, m’tractor broke down this mornin’ and was hopin’ y’d help tinker with it… we still got plenty of time b’fore it gets dark out…” He didn’t wanna pressure his guest, but he also knew Red loved to fix up old cars and them fancy loud motorized bikes. Nobody had them things ‘round here but he remembered Red showing him some of the before and after pictures on his phone. Most folks just had old reliable pickup trucks and those with kids might have a car or beat up van. Nothin’ new or shiny lasted ‘round here before getting dents, scrapes and mud all over it.

Some folks didn’t bother with normal vehicles most the time and just used a tractor or riding lawnmower to get somewhere as long as they didn’t need to go t’town or use the few paved roads. Since most th’roads and long driveways were hard packed dirt, sometimes bigger tires with the grip was better… ‘specially after a heavy rain when it got muddy. It wasn’t the rainy season right now and it didn’t get dark too early yet, so even if Red didn’t wanna help at the moment, there was still time to do it later.