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Neville stared at the glowing creature in front of him. "I beg your pardon?"
He sincerely hoped he had misheard what the...whatever it was had said. Because even for Louisiana, with all of their shapeshifters, hedgewitches, and honest-to-god vampires running around in the open with Muggles, the concept of fairy godparents was a little ridiculous.
And crazy. Very crazy. Nearly Voldemort-level crazy.
"I'm your fairy godfather," the fairy repeated, sweeping his long blond hair back from his face. Neville could just make out the elongated pointed tips of what were decidedly not human ears. It wasn't fair that he looked so damn attractive. Shouldn't fairy godfathers look a little more human, or at least have some sort of physical flaws instead of looking like Adonis? "See, I couldn't reveal myself to you before because you weren't in America and I'm sort of limited to working on this side of the world, but you're here now, and so am I, and now I can help you!"
Maybe Neville had hallucinated the ears. He had been around some strange magical plants lately. It was possible. Unlikely, since he respected plants and was always cautious around new ones since he didn't know what they were capable of, but it was possible.
Or maybe he had found a crazy person. Maybe he was a V addict. Did V addicts get pointed ears? He couldn't remember. Hermione had been talking fairly quickly by the time she reached the topic of illicit drugs in Louisiana's supernatural world on the flight over from London.
"I'm not crazy."
And he read minds. Fantastic.
"And I'm not a V addict." The fairy shuddered. "Wouldn't touch that stuff even if my life depended on it."
Right.
"I'm doing this all wrong. Let me try again." The fairy offered his -- still! -- glowing hand. "Hello, Neville. I'm your fairy godfather. My name is Harvey.
Gingerly, Neville accepted Harvey's hand. The man-creature-fairy-thing beamed at him, the golden glow under his skin kicking up a few notches so now he resembled a man-shaped reading lamp.
Maybe this would all be a dream. A really strange dream. One brought on by one of those Snickle-wart Humbingers that Luna had been telling him about a few days ago.
Harvey reached out and pinched him.
With a yell, Neville jerked away. He stared at the fairy, then his arm, and then back at the fairy.
Not a dream. Reality settled in.
He had a fairy godfather named Harvey.
Oh. Crap.
Where were Hermione and Luna when he needed them?