Chapter Text
Deep in the seventh ring of Hell, a very important meeting was taking place.
The seventh ring, known as the Ring of Envy, was cold and lonely, filled with the greatest estates of the Goetia Royal families. Mansions and castles line golden-brick roads as snow falls from the cloudy cavern roof far above. Mighty stalactites hung low through the cloud layer, some of the mightier Goetia having made their homes within them.
But none could compare to the center of the Ring.
The Morningstar Palace was built on the ancient, long frozen shores of the Cocytus, known to all as the wailing river. The opulent structure was a sight to behold: spiraling towers topped with golden domes, beautiful gardens full of plants taken from throughout the universe, fountains that were taller than even the mighty Goliath, and vast keeps with extravagant halls that could hold over ten thousand souls. Everything led to a central, cathedral-like structure that was the beating heart of all of Hell.
It was in this extravagant and exquisite manse that the seven rulers of the rings of Hell talked about their liege lord and master. It was he who they served most dearly and fell from Heaven with. The Sin of Pride himself, and he who ruled the seven rings of Hell with an iron fist: Lucifer Samael Morningstar.
One shudders to imagine what sinister plots were being cooked up. What horrible events were being planned out by the denizens of this horrid hall? What atrocities were being brought to light by the Seven Deadly Sins themselves?
"Maybe if we got him drunk that would cheer him up?" Queen Bee-lzebub, ruler of the ring of Gluttony, asked nervously, ringing her four hands together as the amalgamation of fox, insect, and wolf looked at her comrades.
"It's gotta be better than Ozzie boy's idea," Mammon said, the spider-like jester of Greed picking his razor-like fangs with a claw as he threw a glare at the ever-burning Asmodeus of Lust.
"I said I was sorry, alright?" Asmodeus snarled, angry and not the least bit embarrassed, "It was a stupid idea and I really wish you'd all drop it."
Belphegor, the candle-headed and pale purple goat-like Sin of Sloth, scratched her chin with one of her four arms and looked Ozzie in the eyes, "No. No, we're holding that over your head. Why would you think getting some dancers would cheer up Lucy?"
"I SAID I WAS SORRY! PLEASE MOVE ON!"
"It was a shit idea and we all know it!" Satan, lord of Wrath and the technical largest of the Seven Sins due to never loeavign his draconic true form, yelled as he cracked the armchairs of his throne.
Rather than using the meeting chamber of the Sins to plot the demise of the world, or the birth of the Antichrist, or anything most humans would assume the Seven Deadly Sins would do, the six highest ranking beings in Hell under the Morning Star himself were discussing how best to cheer up their boss.
Lucifer, as they'd known for the last six years, was severely depressed. When Lilith left him suddenly, divorcing the man she'd been married to for almost ten thousand years for reasons unknown and unexplained, the first fallen angel had closed himself off from the world. And so, in his office he remained…for almost seven whole years next month.
Queen Bee had gathered the Sins together because, after so long, she'd been worried he'd killed himself. How that'd even work was unknown to the ruler of Gluttony, but she hadn't been willing to take a chance.
The other Sins had been against it, wanting to spend time in their own rings. None of them had thought the problem to be that bad. But then they saw the mountain of rubber ducks their master had made. They saw the rubber duck he made of his currently estranged daughter…and the one he made of his wife.
Even Mammon felt a twinge of worry in his black and greedy heart after that.
Currently, the Sins were in deep discussion about how to remedy the situation before things got worse. Though since they were immaterial beings who fell from Heaven alongside Lucifer, their knowledge of how to do so was limited.
"...think just getting him some strippers would make him feel better? Are you high!?" Mammon ranted and raved as Asmodeus lost control and turned to his true form: A colossal bonfire of a demon with three burning heads surrounded by blue and purple flames.
"I have had it with you and your DAMN INSULTS, YOU ABSOLUTE PIECE OF-" Asmodeus raged, the Sin of Lust getting right up in Mammon's face as his claws sharpened. Mammon shed his form to show his true self as well: A massive arachnid beast with a dozen burning eyes atop his pale white face and fanged mouth. The two Sins looked ready for blows.
"Enough!" Queen Bee-lzebub shouted, turning into her monstrous True Form as well: A colossal fox like-demon with burning eyes and more arms than most, standing taller than anyone else in the room, "This is getting annoying and it's not helpful!"
"Hate to agree, but…yeah," Belphegor scratched the side of her candle-topped head and looked awkwardly at the others, "If we want to help Lucifer, this isn't going to do it."
Asmodeus and Mammon both glared hatefully at one another, still ready to fight. Eventually, they both released their true selves and powered down, refusing to look at one another.
Satan scratched at his chin and a light went off in his reptilian eyes, "You know, Bee didn't have that bad an idea. Let's get him drunk."
"Just giving him a drink won't cut it though," Bee explained as she tried to convey seriousness to all the other Sins, "If we just get him drunk then he'll get depressed and all, well...sad n' shit." The party queen of Gluttony spread her arms wide, "We gotta give him a party!"
"Preferably one that doesn't remind him of all his problems," Belphegor said helpfully, making Bee wince. All of Hell would remind him of that, it was his eternal imprisonment for the Garden fiasco.
"Where in Hell could we go that wouldn't remind him of her though?" Satan asked to which mischievous chuckling broke out from Asmodeus, the Sin of Lust twirling a crystal between his fingers.
"Nowhere," He said with three grins, "We might have to branch out. Okay, just hear me out on this…" He talked and talked and talked until smiles and grins appeared on every Sin's face.
Even Mammon was smiling.
"Also, Mammon's paying," Asmodeus said with a cocky smirk.
Mammon was no longer smiling.
**********
Lucifer Samael Morningstar tried to smile. He really did. However, he was pretty sure that it came off as an awkward grimace.
The ruler of the Seven Rings of Hell was currently sitting up in the human world, in human disguise, as the other six Sins supplied him with drinks to keep his mind off of his many troubles.
It was some human nightclub. He couldn't remember the name and he didn't know if he cared to find out.
He and the rest of his fellow Fallen Ones were clad in human disguise, though all he'd changed was his chalk-white skin tone to that of a normal human pale. He also left all his snake and apple iconography back at the palace on Asmodeus' orders. Said it was so he didn't "Scare off the locals and draw unwanted attention."
He was currently sitting in a booth as his Sins mingled with the crowd of humans like lifelong friends. Belphegor had remained behind to stay with him while the others went to get drinks, promptly getting distracted in the process.
Queen Bee had basically taken over the bar as she forced the bartender out and started making her own concoctions after taking a single sip of something called "Bud-weiser", declaring it a travesty. Ozzie was currently tearing up the dancefloor to much applause. Mammon had stayed with Bee to steal drinks off of her. Satan was arm-wrestling various people to much applause. Leviathan was…somewhere. Nobody was certain where exactly they'd gone off to after getting a single hit off a joint.
Belphegor was the only one who hadn't left him. Wasn't that a sad thought?
The blonde-haired lord of Hell looked to his eternlly sleepy friend, currently disguised as a tan-skinned woman wearing a wide brimmed hat atop her dark curls, as she continued on, "-really! I mean, who would want to pass up on a guy like you?"
"Lilith, apparently," Lucifer said glumly, holding something called a Long Island Iced Tea in his hands and resting his depressed head down on the hard table before him.
"Well, like I was saying, it's her loss, your majesty."
Lucifer said nothing and just continued to listen to the absolute wall of noise going on around him. The music was giving him a headache if he were honest, and the constant flashing lights were getting annoying.
But his friends had brought him here, so here he would stay.
"Belph…how long have we known each other?" He asked suddenly.
The tanned woman paused, scratching at her chin as she thought about it, "About ten thousand years next month, your majesty."
"Do you ever miss it?"
There was no need to ask what 'it' was.
"...sometimes," Belphegor admitted with a grimace. She looked away and stared into the distance, "I think…I think when the days are quiet with nothing to do, we all think about that place. I know I find myself thinking about it whenever there's only myself and my thoughts for company."
Lucifer said nothing, just stared at his drink, "I think…I think sometimes it would have been better had I never messed with the apple at all."
Silence met his declaration as Belphegor stared at him in shock. She abruptly stood up and said, "Excuse me a moment your majesty!"
And like that, she rushed off.
Oh great, now even Belphegor's abandoned me… he thought miserably.
The club, he decided, was not a fun place to be. There was only one thing left to do.
**********
"Bee! Bee grab your shit and get back to the table! We have an emergency!"
Bee was just done mixing one of her famous Beelzejuice cocktails when Belphegor arrived in a tizzy, her expression alarmed. "Relaaaax, it's fine!" Bee waved off, "Once I get these humans their drinks I'll come ba-"
"He just said he regretted the apple entirely, Bee."
Bee dropped her glass, breaking it as she turned to the sin of Sloth and asked, "He did what?"
"Started asking me if I missed Heaven and then mentioned regretting ever messing with the apple!" She shouted.
Bee blinked and then sent her kegs of Beelzejuice back to the pocket dimension they resided in. Turning to her patrons, she yelled, "Bar's closed everyone! Go home!"
The humans got angry and uppity and some rando who pretended to be a bartender said something about being the real bartender and that no, it wasn't closed. But he served substandard alcohol, so Bee throat-punched him and went off to drag everyone back to the table.
"Sorry about the wait, your majesty! Had to deal with some things but I…just wanted… to…" Bee petered off, the Sins now staring at an empty booth where the King of Hell had been sitting just moments ago.
"Maybe he went home?" Ozzie suggested, rubbing his hands together with pure anxiety.
When they tried to call him only for it to go directly to voicemail, they began to freak out.
**********
The dingy bar he found himself in was quite refreshing, actually. It was lonely and quiet, nobody to bother him and nobody to keep an act up. Some human song played over the speaker as the bartender kept him stocked up with Hard Apple Cider.
He'd taken off once he saw how much fun the Sins were having and didn't want to bring down the mood. The music was loud, the lights were too bright, and he was just sitting awkwardly by himself, staring into his drink.
So he left, wandering aimlessly and teleporting from place to place as he saw the world, eventually ending up in some hole-in-the-wall town in some hole-in-the-wall bar.
Lucifer said nothing, just nursing his drink and continuing to wallow.
Charlie was off on her own, taking up shop in the Ring of Pride doing…something. He remembered her mentioning she'd bought a plot of land and was planning to build something, but he'd still been reeling over Lilith leaving. So when she explained it, he just tuned her out.
Father help him, he was a piece of shit, wasn't he? Drove off the reason he fell in the first place, drove off his daughter, drove off his butlers as they went to go help out said daughter…
And Lucifer was alone.
He'd have continued wallowing had the sound of the door opening not alerted him to the fact that another had joined him in solitude.
He heard, rather than saw, said figure join him at the counter as he just continued staring at his drink.
"I like your suit."
The voice was female, mature and comforting as he finally looked up.
She was pretty, that much he could say: Warm tanned skin, dark chocolate hair with some streaks of gray in it, a pair of glasses over hazel eyes and laugh lines that crinkled up when she smiled. Which she was doing now, staring at him.
He blinked at her and the smile dropped.
"Sorry, you just…you looked so sad that I thought you could use a compliment. I'll just-" She made to leave. Perhaps it was the alcohol from earlier mixing with the alcohol of the now, because what he blurted out to save himself was:
"Thanks, I like your suit too!"
She was not, in fact, wearing a suit. She was, in fact, wearing a comfortable sweater and some jeans.
His face burned and she just stared at him before chuckling, "Ay dios mio, thank you!" She rolled with it, sitting back down and smiling at him, "I'm Camila."
"I'm-" Well, shit, he hadn't planned on talking to any humans while up here, so he didn't have an alias ready. "I'm Luciiiiiius, Lucius. Lucius is my name," He smiled as a trickle of sweat worked its way down his neck. That, he decided, was very close.
The pretty woman, Camila, just kept smiling at him, "I didn't expect to find anyone in this bar, actually. It's sort of old and past its prime."
Lucifer shrugged, "I just found myself in the area and went to the first bar I found so…you know? I guess it's luck or something?"
"Ah, out of towner?"
"Something like that," He really hoped she wouldn't ask any follow up questions. To avoid that, he blurted out, "So what brings you to a place like this?"
The smile dropped off her face, "My husband loved this place." Oh. Oh dear. His stomach fell out of him as she stared sadly down at her drink, "I try to come once a year, just to…to remember him."
And suddenly his crippling depression was back.
"I guess now that they're closing the place down I'll have to find a new place to get drunk and remember," She offered a shaky smile and something in him snapped.
"My wife and I…we had this spot," Lucifer remembered the Garden. Those innocent days before that damn apple ruined everything, "It was a magical place. Peaceful, quiet, and just for us. Well, mostly for us, but the other guy wasn't using it very much so we didn't care."
She listened, she was actually listening to him so he kept talking, "Eventually…eventually, I did something stupid and my father…I deserved the reaction, I think. Got kicked out of H-town, got kicked out of town." He swirled his drink, lost in memories, "Wish I could see it one last time."
"I'm sure your wife appreciates just being with you," She chuckled, a pained noise underneath it, "I know Manny wouldn't care if the bar got torn down, but I understand where you're coming from."
"My wife and I…we're no longer together." He explained to which she nodded and smiled sadly.
"At least she's still alive."
He raised his glass of Apple Cider, "To lost loves, I suppose."
She stared for a moment before she raised her glass as well, "To lost loves."
They downed their drinks and smiled sadly at one another.
"Do you…want to talk about him?" He asked nervously.
**********
They talked of many things, over many drinks, as the night went on.
They talked about their children…
"Oh, my darling girl is the apple of my eye!" He gushed, warmth and love radiating off of his tipsy form from all over, "I remember when she was only up to my knee. She came to me one day - giggling like mad, before jumping out from behind a wall dressed like a duck!"
Camila laughed hard, her cheeks flushed from drink as the two parents bonded over their kids, "Oh my goodness! That sounds adorable!"
"She shouted out 'I'm Charduck, dad!'" He laughed uproariously at that. "It was the cutest thing I'd ever seen and I nearly died of a heart attack! It was too sweet!"
"Que lindo- I remember once, Luz tried sticking her head through the railings of the stairs," Camila said warmly, giggles threatening to break out of her.
"No! She didn't," He laughed.
"She did, she totally did! We had to call the fire department because we couldn't get her out all the while she was just smiling and singing along to the TV," Camila gasped suddenly and reached for her pockets, "I think I still have pictures!"
"Please, I'll show you some of Char-char."
They talked about ducks…
"...bit of a hobby of mine," He was far more drunk now, his voice slurring near the edges every couple of words, "I mean it's not cosplay levels of cool but-"
"No, no," Camila, who had been matching him drink for drink, said, "I'd love to see it."
He awkwardly fished around in one of his coat pockets and produced a simple duck he made: this one dressed similarly to him but with the added top hat he usually wore.
"Aww, he's a cute little guy!" She cooed, reaching out to grab ahold of the simple squeaky toy and turn it over in her hands, "You know, Luz used to make me these tinfoil swans. My heart melted whenever she did it and I tried to keep as many as I could."
"She still make them?" He asked, curious.
"There was this period where I thought she became 'too grown up' to do so, but luckily there was…err, another reason so she still does it sometimes," She awkwardly rubbed the back of her head and chuckled.
Lucifer, however, focused on another part of what she said.
"Urgh, don't get me started on Char-char's 'Emo' phase," He groaned and slumped in his seat, "Always calling me 'Old Man' this and 'stop hugging me, it's lame!' that." He blew a raspberry and rolled his eyes, "As if there's anything less lame than hugging your father."
Camila laughed, "I think I'm lucky Luz avoided that, mostly."
"Yeah, it sucked!" he groaned in embarrassment, "I much preferred when she got into Cosmic Frontier."
Camila began to vibrate in excitement, "She likes Cosmic Frontier?"
Lucifer chuckled awkwardly, "Well, I mean, she doesn't like it-"
"I love Cosmic Frontier!" She laughed and stared at him with happy eyes.
"-that is to say, not as much as I do!" He drew himself up and desperately began trying to remember what he could of the books, if only to keep the smile on her face.
And they talked at length about their lost loves once Camila was ready.
"I remember when he proposed, you know?" She was nearly silent, her eyes glassy as she recounted, "It was in a park outside the convention hall we met at. He pushed me on the swings like we were children and I just…I just felt alive like nothing else."
Lucifer said nothing, just listening with rapt attention. He felt like disrespecting either of them by talking would be…would be evil. So he held his tongue and kept his ears open.
"I remember when I fell out of the swing with a laugh and tackled him. We just rolled around for a bit underneath the stars and…and the ring fell out of his pocket," She laughed, little hiccupy giggles that were marred by tears, "He became so embarrassed that I tried to do it all over again just so he could do it perfectly."
"He sounds like an amazing guy," Lucifer admitted.
She smiled at him and for reasons he couldn't explain, his drunken heart flipped in place.
"He was…he really was."
And now they were talking about Lilith. Drunkenly talking about Lilith.
"And she just left! No call, no sign, no nothing! Just left me and Char-Char alone forever!" Lucifer ranted, his arms waving about as he drunkenly raved, "So who needs her! I don't!"
"Yeah!" Camila called out, her head resting drunkenly on his shoulder, "Yeah, we don't need her!"
"I'm my own demon!"
"Yes you are!" Camila yelled, and then started blinking, "Wait, did you just say-"
"I can do what I want!" Lucifer finished with a drunken yell.
Camila chalked the weirdness up to being absolutely hammered and promptly ignored it…and then immediately forgot it, "Yeah, we don't need her at all!"
"But you wanna know what I need?" A gruff voice asked and the two drunken patrons turned to see the bartender glaring at them, arms crossed, "For you both to pay your tab and get the hell out. It's closing time."
"No it isn't," Lucifer said angrily, turning his head to the clock on the wall, "It's only…two thirty? Yeah, two thirty!"
"And the bar closes at two," The bartender said, "Look, I don't care what you two do, but you can't stay here and you need to pay." He raised an eyebrow and angled himself in front of the door just in case they tried to drunkenly make a run for it, "Preferably, pay now."
Lucifer, not caring about his human disguise, fished around in the pocket dimension sewn into his coat and pulled out a bar of solid gold. He dropped it on the table where it sent the small pyramid of beer glasses falling over onto the side with nobody on it.
The bartender gaped at the sight before marveling over the fact that the gold bar was real. He moved out of the way and let them pass, immediately leaving for the nearest pawn shop.
The night air was cold, that much Lucifer knew. He stood straight up and wobbled only slightly as he looked about. Some human place called a "Denny's" was lit up like a beacon in the night across the street, while another called the "Budget Motel" was right next to it.
Motel…motel…there was something about the word that tickled the back of his head. For some reason, he felt it had to do with Charlie.
"Oh for- my phone died!" Camila swore something in Spanish as she turned to him again, also swaying, "Can I borrow yours? I have to call my daughter to come pick me up and…no wait, she's off at college." She sighed, "And the other is in Michigan."
"Do you- err, do you want some help?" He asked lamely, not quite sure what he could offer but willing to try for his new buddy all the same.
She smiled at him and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, "I think…I think I'm just going to crash at the motel over there until I'm sober enough to drive."
He nodded and there they stood in silence, her looking at him expectantly and him not understanding what to say due to being drunk.
She stared at him and a pinkness filtered into her cheeks, "This has been a fun night. I liked talking to you," She chuckled warmly, "Your daughter is lucky to have you."
He looked up suddenly, staring at her, "Look, this has been…honestly the most fun I've had in six years. Since Lil left me…I don't know, I've been sad?" That was a lame way to put it, but he was trying to be cool for once, "Severely depressed? One or the other. This has been great. You've been great. Really great…" He chuckled and rubbed the back of his head nervously.
Camila, meanwhile, just stared at him with her cheeks flushed.
"I'm going to…err, crash at that motel too," In truth, it would be until he got through the door so he could teleport back to Pride in peace, but she didn't need to know that, "I can offer to pay for a separate room, of course, but once you're sober could I trouble you for your num-"
There were lips on his. His brain suddenly sobered up enough to realize that Camila was kissing him.
She had grabbed the edges of his fancy jacket and was kissing him.
He…hadn't been kissed like this in years. Centuries if he was being honest with himself.
"Maybe…you could pay for a single room?" She smiled shyly.
Lucifer, drunk off happiness…and also alcohol, readily agreed.
**********
Camila woke up alone.
She hadn't planned on waking up alone but that's what happened.
Last night was…fun. More fun than she'd had in years. She went to mourn the closing of one of Manny's favorite spots but found someone who truly got it! Someone who got her, someone who understood the pain of losing one close to them and who had a child they loved…and who was a massive dork.
She thought they truly hit it off…and now she was alone.
She sighed, getting up and collecting her clothes before dressing sadly. Of course she was going to wake up alone: the kind of storybook romance she had dreamt of as a kid was over and done with. Now she was left alone after a one night stand.
Maybe…maybe it was time to just accept that she would be alone till she went off to see Manny again?
He hadn't even had the decency to leave a note.
She was just thinking about what to tell Luz and Vee when she got home when the door to the room opened, slamming into the wall with a loud bang.
"Whoooo wants pancakes?" Lucius, the man from the bar, was standing in his crumpled fine white suit with a tray of Denny's breakfast in his arms, his smile wide and his eyes shone like stars, "Didn't know what kind you wanted so I got ALL kinds!"
Camila stared. She stared until he finally stopped smiling and began to panic, "Oh… do you not want pancakes? I can go back and-"
"You came back?" She asked, holding back a dozen different emotions.
He just blinked and looked at her with what she was willing to admit was quite adorable confusion, "Why wouldn't I come back?"
Camila…Camila laughed with tears in her eyes and sat back down on the bed.
"I'd love some pancakes," She admitted.