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Loveybug met him for their ‘debriefing’ with a bouquet of roses in her hands. Catwalker—trying to assert his boundaries a little—had politely refused.
“It would be too suspicious if my civilian-self had these after Catwalker received a bunch of flowers,” he said. “And this is supposed to be a debriefing, so we should debrief.”
Undeterred, Loveybug started talking about the akuma they’d faced today, all the while pulling off petals one by one from each rose and throwing each one at him. She had remarkable aim with those things, and now every bit of golden detailing on his costume that had enough of an edge to hold anything had been covered in petals.
Catwalker tried to stay on task and focus on things they would both need to know to be good partners. But he wasn’t entirely sure what to say. He and Ladybug had never tried to coordinate like this between battles, they just had a natural rhythm together that didn’t require words. The closest thing had been when Ladybug had given him a slip of paper with the word ‘Half-wit’ written on it, along with a cryptic explanation that had only fallen into place months later.
It was more information than Ladybug had given him now. She’d just… vanished. She hadn’t even left him a message with her bug phone. She hadn’t even communicated with him via the remote cat toy. And yes, she didn’t have to reach out to him, but having no information at all meant that his mind was filling that void with all the horrible possibilities. Illness, injury, death, despair, indifference…
No. Don’t get lost in the things you don’t know. Focus on the here and now, he reminded himself.
“And you don’t have to worry about a thing!” Loveybug was saying. “I’m constantly reading the Ladyblog, so I know all of Ladybug’s tactics! It’s like we share a mind! Except obviously we don’t, we’re completely different people—I’m all ‘Yay love!’ and she’s all ‘Boo love!’ But other than that, it’ll be like she never even left!”
How he wished that were true. But it wasn’t. But... if Loveybug was as plugged in to Ladybug’s mental state as she claimed… maybe she’d have some answers.
“Loveybug,” he interrupted, “do you happen to know why Ladybug gave up the earrings?”
Something inscrutable passed across Loveybug’s face. Before he could figure out what it was, it was gone and Loveybug was all enthusiasm again. “Yep!”
His heart rose. It’s just that simple?
“What was the reason?” he asked.
“Ladybug embarrassed herself enough in front of Chat Noir enough when she confessed to him that she couldn’t possibly show her face ever again!”
Nothing about that explanation made any sense, but one word in particular caught his attention. “Hold on, what do you mean ‘confess’?”
Loveybug started plucking off some of the rose petals that she’d stuck on Catwalker. “That she’s head-over-heels in love with him and wants to kiss his kissable lips and ride off into the sunset to have his babies!”
That sounded far more like one of Chat Noir’s fantasies than Ladybug’s. He definitely would have noticed if Ladybug had ever asked such a thing of him (okay, admittedly Ladybug did mention babies a lot during their last conversation, but that was just her getting flustered about bringing up the shared dream they’d had that one time and how neither of them could remember just how many blue-eyed babies they’d had together by the end. It definitely wasn’t an indication of romantic interest on her part).
“You have it backwards,” Catwalker said. “Chat Noir is the one who’s in love with his partner. Ladybug has made it abundantly clear that they will only ever be platonic.”
“You’re the one who’s got it all backwards!” Loveybug insisted, stomping her little foot. “He’s the one who rejected her this time!”
“Ladybug has never shown any interest in Chat Noir.”
“She pulled out a fancy candlelit table and talked about how great he is and gave him goo-goo eyes!” She said, throwing all the rose petals still in her hand into the air. “How is that not the most obvious flirting ever?”
He could understand how Loveybug might misconstrue things when she put it like that, but she didn’t know Ladybug like he did.
“They flirt platonically all the time,” Catwalker corrected. “It never means anything but a deep and abiding friendship.”
Loveybug groaned. “Why can’t you see it? Chat Noir moved on from loving her right before Ladybug realized how amazing he really is! She was so stupid to have missed seeing how much of a cat -ch he really was!”
Oh. She’s projecting, isn’t she?
“Is that why you flirted with him after inheriting the earrings?” he asked gently. “Because you thought you had a chance when Ladybug didn’t?”
“You know about that?” she asked, face going pale. “Uhh… I mean… what flirting?”
Catwalker folded his arms and arched an eyebrow in reply.
“Okay, fine!” She flung her arms straight up in the air. “Yes, I was hoping he’d kiss me back! I knew it’d probably never happen, but can’t a girl dream? What kind of girl wouldn’t want some kissy kissy meow meow from her superhero partner? But I just had to mess up everything by being so much of a lovesick loon that I scared him away! Because of course I wouldn’t be someone he loved back! It’s like… no matter what I do, I’m doomed to never have anything with any boy I even think about loving.”
The part of him that had been Chat Noir felt like he was looking in a mirror. He had begged for the chance to be loved back, only to be rebuffed at every turn. He had felt the rejection of always having too many inconvenient feelings. He had clung to the person he loved with full knowledge that his dreams would likely only ever be dreams… and then he had lost that person without warning.
Loveybug deserved more than to have been thoughtlessly abandoned by him. And maybe it was too late to do this as Chat Noir, and maybe this might make things worse, but…
“If a kiss from a cat hero is all you want…” he said slowly, “I could… indulge your curiosity. Just this once.”
It would only cost him a moment. One moment, to prove to her that she wasn’t inherently unlovable.
“W-what?” she stammered. “You barely even know me!”
He knew her plenty. She was the same as him.
“I know enough that I want to help you be happy, Loveybug,” he said, picking up the one rose from Loveybug’s bouquet that still had petals and placing it behind her ear. “As Catwalker, my duty is to help my partner with whatever she needs and act as Chat Noir’s substitute for what he cannot do himself. And maybe you’re not even attracted to someone like me, in which case I apologize for assuming, but—”
What followed might be best described as “kissy kissy meow meow.” He was pleasantly surprised to discover he enjoyed it very very much much.