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It was a completely normal day at the infamous Nanba prison, where the inmates were significantly less dangerous than the outside world could ever expect.
Well, morning.
The inmates of cell thirteen rose before wake up call, due to a loud storm raging outside, the ocean battering against the rocky shoreline.
“Man,” Uno groaned as Jyugo shuffled next to him and Rock rose from his comforters straight up like a vampire. “Who shoved a stick up Jesus ass this mornig?”
“Don’t talk about him like that,” Rock defended, already on his knees and rolling the comforter up in a neat ball. He was always the first to get out of bed.
“You religous now?” Uno asked, shaking Jyugo’s shoulder to get him up and out so that Rock could roll their futons up.
“Nope, just scared of him.”
“Ah, makes sense.”
“At least we won’t have to train outside,” Jyugo yawned, eyes half lidded as Uno forced him to braid his giant curtain of hair away from his face. Jyugo was always the best at braiding his hair with nimble lockpicker fingers. Surprising, since he wasn’t good at much of anything.
“You never know, Yamato may throw us into the ocean and have us tread water as his extracurricular.”
Rock and Jyugo cringed at Uno’s prediction because it was very a very possible outcome. Maybe… they should hide from Yamato when he came for wake up call, make a pillow fort to protect them. Barricade the door.
“Hey, it’s really quiet this morning,” Uno murmured, once Jyugo had finished his braid and pulled his hat on. “Where’s Niko?”
There was no familiar head of green hair where his sleeping bag lay.
“Hmm, maybe he went to the infirmary in the middle of the night?” Rock suggested, “it wouldn’t be the first time.”
Suddenly, there was shuffling from the vacant sleeping bag, and that was when the inmates noticed the very small lump, rolling around.
They all sweatdropped.
“H-hey…” Uno shivered like the scaredy cat he was, “you don’t think…”
“A rat?” Rock took the broom from the corner of the cell and used the dull end to lift the edge of the comforter, just as Uno and Jyugo darted behind him to hide from whatever alien lurked underneath the blankets.
It was…
A small…
Familiar head of long green hair.
A small, familiar little child.
Baby… Niko?
The little child opened carmine eyes and they suddenly filled with tears.
“Oh no no no,” Uno, suddenly brave, threw Rock to the side as he lowered himself to a crouch to pick up and cradle the small thing, swathed in the remains of Niko’s prisoner outfit. “It’s okay, don’t cry kid.”
His soothing, apparently worked because baby Niko only sobbed for one small moment before closing his eyes again and cooing.
“Why does this kind of shit always happen to us?” Jyugo deadpanned, unimpressed with the humor of the universe as he took Niko’s comforter and rolled it to the corner of the cell with the rest of theirs.
“I dunno,” Rock shrugged, “Niko must have come down with one of those weird ass illnesses he always gets. It is that time of the year, the pollen count is high and… and, wait. Aren’t all of Niko’s sicknesses contagious?”
Jyugo froze. “Yeah… Uno-”
It was too late.
When the two looked over, Uno was smaller too. Shorter, neater hair, standing next to little Niko and looking down at him with wonder. He was notably older than him, but still young, maybe seven or eight.
Jyugo didn’t know, he wasn’t the best at aging children considering he never hung around any in his entire life.
“Who are you?” Little Uno asked curiously, not to the older ones, but Niko. He booped his nose and little Niko giggled, which in turn, made Uno giggle. It would have been cute if Jyugo and Rock weren’t so focused on getting out of the damn room so that neither of them could be turned into children.
“Get us outta here!” Rock shouted, banging on the bars of the cell door. “Yamato! I know your athletic ass is down this hall, so jog it over here!”
Jyugo felt for the bobby pin kept in the hem of his pants, sneaking past Rock in a last ditch effort to escape.
But it was too late for them, Uno was approaching them, asking questions non stop.
“Who are you?”
“Why are we locked in this cell?”
“Are we prisoners? I’ve heard prisoners are bad, did you kill someone?”
“Why are you so big?”
“And you, why do you look so scrawny? Don’t they feed you here?”
They were backed into a corner.
Then, Jyugo felt a tug at his pant leg, and looked down to see baby Niko slobbering all over it.
Their screams echoed through Nanba’s corridors accompanied by the howling wind and pounding rain.
Yamato was a simple guard on a simple mission. Wake up the prisoners of the building and get them to the indoor gym to run some laps to ease them into their day. Exercise was the best way to better a prisoner's mental state in the mornings, especially a rainy one such as this one.
Most of them had been grumpy to get up, running on little sleep because of the loud nature of the rainstorm, but once Yamato accompanied them to the gym, they seemed to be relieved to see the track. Or get rid of him.
Though it was a peculiar sight when he stopped in front of cell thirteen to see no one occupying it, but heard small cries.
Yamato was used to groans and yelling from cell thirteen, especially in the mornings when he came to pick them up. Crying was certainly a new response, (well, for most of them. Sometimes the scrawny one in stripes still cried.)
“There is nothing to be sad for inmates, it is a good day!” He announced as he made his usual flashy entrance, the cell door hitting the wall with the force he pushed into it.
It swung, and nearly sideswiped… Something.
Upon closer look, it was a little kid.
Upon even closer look, there were four little kids dispersed amongst the cell, red faced and sobbing their little hearts out.
Yamato reached for his walkie talkie. “Sir Hajime, we have an issue.”
“So you’re telling me,” Hajime started, once his subordinate said his piece. “That they woke up this way?”
“I assume so.”
“Hmm,” Hajime eyed the littlest one, inmate number twenty five, cradled in one of the other kids- Uno’s- arms. “This seems like one of twenty five’s crazy sicknesses to me.”
“Sir, I agree.”
Hajime sighed. It was too early for this, and he could already tell that it would be a long day. “Let’s get them to the infirmary.”
Which was easier said than done.
Convincing them was the challenge.
Little Uno seemed curious and agreeable until paired with the bigger and protective Rock, along with Niko, who just sniffled and sniffled in Uno’s arms.
“How do we know you’re not… not…. Kid-kid nappers!” Uno barred his teeth, holding the little ball of Niko close. He had a lisp. A very noticeable one.
“I am a prison guard.”
“Oh yeah? Show us some ID!” Rock growled, pointing an accusatory finger to Hajime. He seemed older than the rest. Old enough to not have clumsy motions when he walked, but young enough to still barely reach Hajime’s waist. Young enough to be chubby with baby fat.
Hajime sighed at the tedious work as he reached into his lapels to protrude his official badge, flashing it for the little scoundrels to see.
They all looked shell shocked, and even inmate number fifteen poked his head out from his hiding spot behind Rock to see it.
“B-but you can’t be a guard!” Rock argued, “You’re bald!”
A tick mark formed on Hajime’s head. His very bald head. “Oh, I can shave your little heads off-”
The kids all reeled back and squeals. He had scared him. He cleared his throat and put his outstretched hands back down.
“Maybe he’s not so bad, even if he’s old,” Uno suggested. “I don’t wanna be stuck in this cell all day.”
Rock dropped his defensive posture, “… okay. But if he’s dangerous, im beating him up.”
Uno smiled, “that’s okay.”
Hajime already had a headache. “Alright then, follow me.”
Behind him, Rock took the lead with the little troublemaker who hadn’t spoken a word thus far trailing behind him, clutching into his sleeve. Number 11 refused to let anyone else Carry Niko, taking the baby with his small arms and was probably tired because of it.
Luckily, they didn’t make much of a fuss through their check ups, though all looked uncomfortable to a varying degree as the doctor poked and prodded. Maybe, it was the shock of waking up in a new, unfamiliar place.
“They look to be varying ages, I can’t tell exactly where along the line they are, but that doesn't matter. They’re healthy and should be back to normal, Niko’s little sicknesses never last for long.” The doctor, so unhelpfully informed him. “I guess I’ll leave them in your hands.”
Hajime halted.
He had duties to perform, he couldn’t just waste time watching kids… but it was his duty to watch after his inmates, afterall. They weren’t injured or sick, so he couldn't dump them on Nanba’s doctor.
“...Fine. See to the rest of the prisoners for the day. Do you have any child leashes?”
Unfortunately, the doctor did not carry any disposable child leashes, so Hajime was forced to bring the four back to the lounge, no matter how much he just wanted to dump them back into their cell and lock them up until they were all better.
Strangely enough, they were more well behaved as kids than grown ups.
“What do you want us to do, Mr…” Rock stumbled, awkward.
“Hajime. You may call me Mr. Hajime.”
“Oh,” he nodded, “then why are we here and what do you want us to do, Mr. Hajime?”
As Hajime looked down at four big pairs of eyes, he realized they were asking him for work. They expected him to put them to work like little child soldiers.
He… could, if he wanted to.
He glanced at them again.
He wouldn’t.
Instead, he dug through the file cabinets and protruded colored construction paper and multiple art supplies. Inmate number 11’s eyes sparkled as he spread them out over the break room table. “You lot can color while I find some food for you. Can you be good while I’m gone for a quick moment?”
They all nodded, minus Niko, who cooed a little from where Uno sat him on the couch, leaning against Rock in a little bundle.
He would need to find some clothes for them too.
Hajime should not have left them alone.
They were children.
He never knew what to expect from children because he had never watched any before, only the man children who resided in cell thirteen.
When he got back, the blueprints to the prison were laid out on the table while next to it, Jyugo was copying it on the wall with a blue crayon to trace the best escape routes. On either side of him, Uno and Rock nodded in giddy unison while Niko made whatever noises babies made from the couch.
Hajime’s eye twitched.
“Boys!”
They all stopped in their tracks.
Inmate number 15 dropped his crayon.
They all slowly turned to him and inmate twenty-five giggled in what felt like a mocking way.
“What are you doing?”
The other two tried to make excuses while Jyugo looked to his bare feet and pouted. “I-I’m sorry Mr. Hajime. We- we just wanted ‘ta know where we are.”
… Cute.
Wait.
Dammit.
“It’s raining outside, so you wouldn’t last out there anyway, since the sea is raging. You could build a raft, but you’d still die.”
In Front of him, the little kid's sweat dropped.
Little number 11 laughed a bit nervously, “I think we’ll stay here then.”
“Yes, smart choice.” He held out clothes for the four, “Here, these should be more comfortable for you.”
Uno’s eyes lit up as he immediately took the heap of small clothes from Hajime’s hands. The smallest prison uniforms he could find on short notice. He didn’t know why they had such small sizes, but he supposed criminals came in all shapes and sizes. Or maybe the doctor had already planned for this specific occasion.
While Hajime had his back turned to wash the crayon away from the wall, the little heathens changed, and by the time he turned back, Uno and Rock were trying to help little Niko into his, while Jyugo shied away in the corner.
“Umm.. Mr. Hajime?” Uno said, biting his lip as the uniform almost slid off of the toddler, “I think it’s too big for him.”
Hajime sighed for the unpteenth time that day, and it wasn’t even lunch yet. “It’s the smallest size we have, it’ll have to do. Jyugo, get over here, I have food for you.”
He set out four capri suns and a large plate of pizza rolls that Shiro had so graciously cooked up on top of the art covered table. It would be a pain in the ass to clean up later.
Number 69, as expected, was all over the pizza rolls while Jyugo picked at it.
“Uhh,” Hajime pointed to little Niko. He was sitting up this time, against Uno. “Can he eat that?”
Number 11 frowned like Hajime was an idiot, “he may be itty bitty, but he has teeth.”
Oh right, he did.
If he had teeth and hair but was just small enough for Uno to carry, how old was he really?
Hajime wouldn’t question it for long, because he would get a headache and inmate number twenty five worked in mysterious ways.
During their next few hours in the lounge, all the way up until dinner, Hajime got some paperwork in while the children chatted and played amongst themselves, even getting a nap in between lunch and dinner where it was silent and peaceful.
In between those times, he noticed small quirks with the children.
His normal trouble inmate, number fifteen, who could pick any lock and didn’t really care what he thought of him, was silent and mousey. Most of the time he stuck to staying in Rock or Uno’s shadow and watching everything the two did with large mismatched eyes
Number 69, Rock, loved food just as ever. He drew it in his crayons, and he talked about his favorite food to the other three. He also had a large protective streak and wouldn’t let any strangers such as Yamato near them when he tried to introduce himself.
Number eleven was outgoing and lustrous, keeping a hold on Niko the whole time to keep the child in check. He was personable and almost as protective as rock was, but less threatening because he was only a little bigger than Jyugo was.
Number twenty five was small and slightly annoying because he ranged from crying one moment to giggling the next. The runt wasn’t anything like the energetic little shit Hajime was expecting.
By the time dinner rolled around, Hajime had a migraine and was about ready to call it quits because the kids had their second wind of energy and were now bugging him. Niko was in his lap, babbling about nonsense and reaching up to his face with small hands. The others were chasing each other around his spinning chair, occasionally bumping into him.
Just as he was about to explode on the kids, Seitarou entered the room, a ray of sunshine through his darkened doom.
“Hello captain-“ he noticed his peril, “uh oh. Is everything okay?”
“Get these children away from me before I skin them alive.”
It was an empty threat, but his blue haired comrade was quick to usher the kids away back to their arts and crafts station on the table.
“I had heard there were inmates turned into children, but I wanted to see them for myself!” He pinched Jyugo’s cheek, who blushed and pulled away in embarrassment. “They’re so precious!”
Hajime huffed, “okay, grandma. Got any caramel candy for them too?”
Seitorou perked up, “I do, actually!”
“No!” Hajime sat up ramrod straight in his chair, “don’t give them any sugar, it was sarcasm.”
His subordinate slumped with a tiny frown, “oh, sorry sir.”
“… would you like to watch them?”
He perked right back up, “oh, oh! Really? Of course I want to!”
If he wanted to all along, why didn’t Hajime just let him watch them the whole damn time?
He stood from his chair, gathering his keys. He had some work to do before sundown. “I’ll be gone for a couple of hours, just make sure no one dies until then.”
By the time Hajime got back, he was worried that Seitarou would have been bullied and tied to a chair by the monster children, but surprisingly, he was holding his own.
He was laughing and playing with the children as if he was one himself, shouting out animals as they played… charades?
Hajime watched from the doorway as number 69 pretended to fly.
“Oh I know that one!” Seitarou raised his hand, “you’re a bird!”
Rock grinned, “how’d you know?”
Uno gave him a high five giddily. From directly next to Seitarou, where Jyugo was sitting, Niko was using his sleeve to attempt to stand, then repeatedly fall on his butt.
He looked to be getting frustrated, but Jyugo always patted his shoulder and helped him back up silently to help him try to walk.
It was a… precious sight. Hajime never got sights like this, working at Nanba prison. They were rare and far between.
Everything was fine until Niko tried to take a step out and fell forward onto his little arms. It didn’t take too long for the waterworks and the shrill whining.
Hajime wished kids had off buttons.
Then again, he had never been a children person.
“Oh no!” Uno looked horrified, but before he could move to help Niko, Seitarou swooped him up and rocked him in his arms.
“Aww, it’s okay little Niko. Walking is hard, but I know you can do it, and so do your friends. Are you hurt?” he looked to his arms that remained unscathed, “I don’t see any hurts, but maybe you just need a hug to make it better.” He held him closer to his chest and Niko stopped crying in turn of clutching onto his lapel with one hand and sucking his thumb with the other.
The room let out a collective sigh of relief.
Finally, night time was upon them.
Hajime had a crick in his neck.
He hadn’t moved from his work for a while, and the four children had gotten suspiciously silent.
He stretched his neck out as he arose to round the couch and see…
Well.
He forgot that kids actually slept at night.
Rock was sprawled out on the couch with Jyugo, curled at his feet in a tight ball. Uno was trapped between Rock and the couch with Niko sleeping on his chest.
Hajime’s headache was gone.
He draped a blanket over the four kids and packed his work away, calling it a night.
The next morning.
“What the fuck? Why am I naked? Why am I on top of Rock?”
“Ew! Get the hell off of me. I don't want it touching me!”
“Wait, we do have clothes, they just tore off because we grew muscle overnight?”
“Have we been reborn? Oh! Are we Superman?”
“No Niko, Superman’s an alien and we’re all just plebeian prisoners.”
“I said GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME THIS IS WAY TOO HOMO EVEN FOR US.”