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It’s nice and hot outside, school’s on break, and Enormeta hasn’t caused any trouble over the past week. This itself is a little suspicious but Kaoruko tries her best to not let this take up too much of her thoughts. Thinking about Enormeta and Baiser takes her mind back though. I have to stop thinking about that day. It won’t happen again.
Her thoughts wander to her friend, her crush. Things have become so strange and she just can’t bring herself to talk about it with her. There has got to be a way to fix her. Hopefully the Shio’s can figure something out soon. She thinks to herself as she sits in the family restaurant waiting for her drink and fries. The door at the entrance jingles its bells and she can see the back of a girl's head talking to the greeter. The prettiest pink she’s ever seen colors the hair of this girl, styled into the shape of drill curls hanging from the sides of her head. Her heart skips a bit and her breath quickens for a moment. Relax… it’s just Haruka and we’re just going to have lunch like we have before. Gosh…. Why did Sayo have to work at the shrine today… she whines to herself. This isn’t like her and it’s driving her crazy.
Haruka comes over to the table waving hello and says “I hope I didn’t keep you waiting long!”
“No, I didn’t get here too long ago myself but I decided to order us some fries to snack on. I… hope you’re fine with that.” And she feels the slightest hints of a blush forming on her face. Haruka hasn’t even done anything and she’s making Kaoruko feel like this. Her stomach is twisting up as her nerves start getting the better of her. She looks at her friend's smiling face as she sits down and notices a soft pink lip gloss coating her lips and how they make them look just a little plumper than usual. Her heart is thumping away in her chest so she bashfully looks away, hoping she wasn’t noticed.
Haruka speaks up and says “It’s been so peaceful hasn’t it? It feels so nice to just be able to relax for a bit and just be normal, right?” With a smile that is just so sincere and full of hope and kindness.
Kaoruko can’t help but stammer when she replies “Y..yeah! It really has been! Not having to deal with the pervert and her goons has been really refreshing. I managed to get some studying done, how about you Haruka?”
This isn’t what she invited her out for and this isn’t what she wants to talk about but her mind is a jumbled mess and the stress makes her mind wander back. Why did it take THAT to trigger her heart. It’s so awful, it’s so painful, and Haruka doesn’t even know what she did. She isn’t at fault for it so Kaoruko doesn’t get mad. No, she doesn’t even get mad at Baiser anymore. Sayo did her best to explain that whatever that was, wasn't their mortal foe. That was something else. Stop thinking about it, this isn’t the time or place she tells herself.
Haruka notices the furrowed brow on her friend's face and reaches out across the table to grab her hand “what’s going on? You’ve been making faces like that a lot more often. You know that you can tell me anything, right?” Kaorukos hands get just a little sweaty and she feels the blush spreading further across her face now along with this burning heat. “Oh it’s nothing, I promise. I think that things have just been so crazy up until last week that it’s worn me out a little. It’s nothing, really!” And to that response, Haruka gets up and comes around the small booth and scoots herself next to Kaoruko.
She trembles a little and tells herself Please Haruka, I can’t focus but of course she doesn’t say it because while she might be panicking her heart is soaring!
These little moments mean the world to her now. She’s terrified of how her heart is getting and how much harder it is to keep these feelings inside. She reminds herself of what Anemo had told her and decides that she’ll open her heart ever so slightly and let her feelings be known just a little at a time. “T-thanks for sitting next to me” and she exhales slowly. “I feel so much better when you’re near me” and she squeezes Harukas hand. She looks at Haruka’s face and lets herself show a gentle smile that anyone who knows her would say was really uncharacteristic of her but love makes you do weird things, doesn’t it?
They sit, eat, talk, and stay together at the booth for an hour. Haruka looks at her phone and says “I’m so sorry but I’ve gotta get home so I can start making food for my sisters. You can come over if you’d like! You’re always welcome” and with that, she’s delivered a one-two punch that Kaoruko can’t defend against. “If you’re sure you’re alright with it, I’d love to come over for a little bit. I can help you cook for your sisters and we can hang in your room afterwards.” She thinks about being in Haruka’s room alone with her and what could happen, then her mind wanders over to it again…
It hurt so much. Being pinned to the ground that way, the way she was kissed. It was like a hungry animal digging in. Those soft lips and the way her tongue moved in her mouth. It was awful because it wasn’t her. It was her but it wasn’t her! The way she started biting her. She thinks about Haruka doing that to her while they are alone in her room and feels her body heating up all over at the thought of it even though she knows it’s wrong. That day it wasn’t her but if it was… if the circumstances were different, she would have been ok with soft gentle Haruka going at her like a monster. All those bites hurt so much and the way she was being grabbed and squeezed was so suffocating and she couldn’t fight back but if they were in her room… and it was the real her…
As they stepped inside and took their shoes off they were greeted by a trio of spirited hellos from the Hanabishi triplets. “Welcome home big sis!” “Hi Kaoruko!” “Hiiiiiiii!” Natsuna ran up and gave Kaoruko a big hug. “It’s good to see you girls. Behaved well while your sister was out?” She was met with enthusiastic head nods and from there things went about how you could expect. They played a bit with the girls and once they were sufficiently tuckered out they began cooking.
Haruka was doing the brunt of the work while Kaoruko was helping with preparing things to be used for the girl’s meals. While she was washing some veggies to get cut up, Haruka shuffled on over and gave her a hug from behind. “Thanks for coming by and helping me. It’s always more fun with help and they love it when you swing by” and Kaoruko fought back this powerful urge building up inside of her to turn around and hug her back and kiss her.
It’s too terrifying to think of such bold behavior being poorly received. Her heart is aching so she settles for just taking one hand and laying it over one of the arms hugging her and replying with “It’ll take a real disaster or my mom really needing my help to stop me from saying yes to you.”
The triplets ate their late lunch and things weren’t any different than how they usually go except now Kaoruko can’t help but notice that she keeps stealing glances at her friend. She looks at her hands and sees how well taken care of they are, takes in how much plumper her lips are looking today, and she can’t help but enjoy the smell of her shampoo.
Not long after Harukas mom came home, babysitting duties were officially over. After saying hello she thought that maybe it’s time for her to go but Anemos words rang in her head again and with a blush she did her best to keep hidden from her friend she asked “is it alright if we hang out in your room for a little? I’m not quite ready to go home yet.”
They head over to Haruka’s room where she’s greeted by the familiar sight of a room adorned with pink paint on the walls, her bed with a few stuffed toys neatly laid out as well as her desk by the window and the large rug in the center of her room. This isn't her first time in the room but now she's conscious of it. That's the bed she sleeps on. That's where she hangs her clothes. That's where she sits and studies. I wonder if she has things hidden away she wouldn't want to show anyone?
They both plop down onto the rug on her floor and lean against her bed just to keep talking about things like they were at the restaurant. Little things like how studies were going for Haruka, where she got the lip balm she was using, and how she’s been feeling over all. This kind of talk is all well and good but there is a really large elephant in the room and no matter what anyone wants, it can't be avoided.
She can’t remember what goes on when she enters her “La Verita” state and nobody has told her what has happened each time she transforms. The talk comes to a standstill and Haruka starts fidgeting a little. She finally breaks the silence “Kaoruko… I hurt you, didn’t I…” it’s a conversation they’ve already had once before and it’s painful to even try to put things into words. Her lips were trembling as she spoke those words. Her eyes are getting a little glossy.
In protest, Kaoruko says “If you hurt me… I wouldn’t be here. We wouldn’t be talking and we probably wouldn’t be friends. You haven’t done anything wrong.”
“But how do I know that this isn't out of obligation to the group? How do I know you're not putting up a front? You're so strong and I… I'm just not. Not like you and Sayo.”
This stabs her right in the gut and she doesn't know what to do so she just acts. She does what her heart says is right and she wraps her arms around Haruka and they just sit there for a bit
If things were different this would lead to some playful kissing and who knows what else after that. Well… Kaoruko knows. She thinks in the moment about how she was bitten and how much it hurt but also about how she would be ok with it if something like that happened tonight. Her heart hurts. She’s thinking about this sort of thing while Haruka is hurting and it makes her feel disgusted. Haruka is trembling, so she hugs her tighter and strokes her head. “You’re ok. Things are ok. Things will get better. I’m here for you. I’ll always be here”
“Then why won't you tell me what I can't remember?” That is the only question that matters right now. Quick, how are you supposed to answer this?
“I promise you that it isn't anything bad. We just don't know why it's happening ourselves but we are trying to find answers.” Not a lie but also not the whole truth. It hurts to do that but this is the situation they are in. Both hearts are hurting right now and she wants to soothe at least Haruka's if not both.
They are both sitting there in this embrace and she can't see Haruka's face but she feels her breath against her shirt and the rhythm as she breathes and she can feel her shirt becoming a little moist as some of the tears Haruka was holding back escape. Then it happens and she doesn’t register what she’s done until after it’s been done.
She’s got her lips pressed against Harukas forehead and the burning feeling is consuming her. She feels herself being squeezed back in return. With a sniffle she hears “Hehehe… that’s a little out of character for you but it really made me feel better. Thank you…” and Haruka stays pressed against her. This isn’t the time to say what she wants. It wouldn’t be fair to Haruka with how vulnerable she is right now. So Kaoruko says nothing and just stays there in the moment, hoping it’ll last til the sun goes cold and the stars go dark.
They are at the door and Kaoruko is slipping her shoes on, getting ready to go while the sun is still over the horizon. Haruka speaks up “Thanks for today. Really…” she looks off to the side with an uncharacteristically bashful expression “I don’t know if Sayo would be able to help me the way you do. Thank you so much for everything.” And the dam starts leaking in Kaoruko’s chest.
She hugs Haruka and tells her “It could only be for you. You’re too important to me” and I love you she thinks but she can’t quite utter those words. Not yet. She wills herself to separate from Haruka and after taking a breath she gives her a smile and waves goodbye as she starts heading home. Was she able to make some of her feelings known? Did she get just a little braver? This is so much harder than she thought it would be but she’s taking small steps.
Right now, in spite of how much thinking about what lead here hurts her, she doesn't regret that it happened because today might not have happened and she might have never even taken this step otherwise. Right now, instead of being brought low, her heart soars.