Chapter Text
He was alone for so long. For a while Eddie thought he might finally learn to live, climb out of his pit and develop a real life for himself again. He still remembers how broken he was the night he become Venom for the very first time, the sorrow that brought him to the church to spew his final garbage apology to whatever deity was willing to put up with him after everything he had done. Sitting between the pews staring at the sagging figure carved into wood, hands bound to the cross behind him. Eddie had stared at that carving for so long he can still picture how the artist captured the twisting tendons from the force of the nails holding the full weight of the man, just as he thought then he still wonders now how the artist knew what that looked like. He had been ready to take his own life, prayers still unanswered, when the creeping black tar overtook him. Instantly even through the fear he had felt every pain, every agonizing memory, every reason he had to blow his own brains out became numb. For once his mind was at ease, a blank canvas feeling much like a child who has yet to experience a true worry. He could barely feel his feet as he was carried out of the building. From that moment onwards everything was better. Statistically and realistically Eddie knows it wasn't as good as it seemed, but for once he wasn't so excruciatingly lonely. His self hatred turned into self confidence, he believed in what they were, he believed in Venom and what that stood for. It's quite surprising how good slowly dying can feel with a little help and a couple lies.
Working together after that moment, even though together they were cast to a life in the shadows, felt like he was finally able to accomplish something meaningful in his life. All he wanted to do was be a hero. They fought a lot but they also taught each other new things every step of the way. Eddie really thought Venom was getting better and that maybe their time together was helping Venom learn where to draw the line in his violence, but this turned out to be an ever rocky battle of broken boundaries and hurtful choices, Every fight between them would end with a lesson learned even if a few bruises were gained along the way. Alien healing made the use of force on each other a bit fruitless but Eddie still felt it all. He made excuses for it all. Every last bit of it. He was poisoned from his mind to his organs and he let it happen. When they finally separated it took Eddie months to be able to collect himself long enough to leave the house, he would become convinced at certain points that he was truly sick just as the symbiote had said and would freak out thinking he was about to die from cancer or organ failure. It was embarrassing how distraught he was despite his claims he no longer wanted to associate with the symbiote. Over and over again he had to remind himself what their bond had done to him, how he'd allowed himself to be used and... abused... in such ways.
This brings us to the present, where Eddie stands across from the symbiote in action. He couldn't tell you why he offered to help collect this "loose symbiote", if he had to he'd probably make up a lie about knowing them well and being best equipped to handle it but in reality he hoped deep down this wild symbiote would maybe be his symbiote. Unfortunately his sick desire came to fruition, judging by the familiar tar like substance wrapped around a man Eddies been informed goes by Lee. They take him down, the military sparing to expenses and Spiderman himself showing up to lend a hand. It's a government operation obviously which means they've taken away the symbiote from Lee as soon as they manage to separate the two long enough to get in there. Eddie sees the choice in his mind. As if it wasn't stupid enough to be here trying this already it seems the universe is practically asking him straight to his face, "Do you really want to do this?". It's terribly unfortunate that he's already decided his answer is yes. He needs this. God he fucking needs him.
There's a guard posted at the entrance to the containment room, already eying up Brock as if he can see directly through his manic eyes and into his rattled soul. "We can't let you in. The specimen is being prepped for transport and you are a liability."
"C'mon, I just want to see it. Trust me, please?" Eddie tries to play it cool but he knows he looks like he's about to crack, which isn't far from how he's feeling inside. All he needs to do is get through the door and he will be safe again. They can be together and life won't feel so fucking painful anymore.
"Trust you? Nobody here in their right mind would trust you, now get out of here before I have to make a call." The guard waved him off, unwilling to entertain this any longer. Not my fault, Eddie says to himself as he wraps his arms around the guards neck and twists. He should have known by the look in my eyes, he tells himself. Not my fault.
He slides the door open and shuffles into the dimly lit room, closing the door behind himself. Up against the back wall of the room sits a large glass tube where the symbiote sits, Eddie would recognize the shape anywhere. Fear strums through his body as he searches frantically for something to break the glass, settling on a metal chair he throws with all the force he can muster, shattering the glass and releasing his partner. Why is he so scared? He wants this.
" Eddie."
He hears the tar hiss at him as it crawls across the floor. Eddie takes a few steps back until he's flush against the opposing wall, his heart beat steadily quickening. Finally, he can be safe again. Maybe this time they can do this right, they can work together. The tar creeps its way up his legs, warm and thick as it wraps and winds around him like a morphing snake all the way to his face. Warmth is all he feels as they come together once again. Almost immediately it is moving around under his skin, fixing and mending and sending off chemicals setting everything just where it needs to be for Eddie to feel complete again.
Before he can come back to himself they are on the move, Venom carrying them through the facility at an alarming pace. Eddie can’t be bothered to worry or care for where they're going or what Venom's plan is, he simply lets himself float in the backseat embracing the feeling of being
surrounded
again. His body and mind are relaxing for the first time in months, no longer in fight or flight needing to constantly be on guard, finally he is allowed to just well and truly rest. Venom may have something to do with Eddie's eyes falling shut within the suit, and the quiet snores that come after.