Work Text:
The school is dead silent, aside from the sound of the air conditioning. Britta could have sworn she heard someone run behind her, but she's locked herself in the study room and there's no way anyone is getting in here.
There's only three of them left. Jeff got out after he tried to attack Abed from behind, Troy shot Jeff in the chest before he could cause any harm. Pierce got Shirley, after distracting her with a crude joke. Troy and Abed went down in a blaze of glory after being attacked by the drama club.
Now it was just Pierce, Annie, and Britta. Britta decided early on that she was going to win this thing. Not just for the eternal glory but also because she was really short on rent this month. She (not so) accidentally blew all her money on spin class groupons that she didn't even use.
Britta opens the blinds, deciding it was better to keep a lookout and giveaway her spot. She had pushed the tables against both doors and now sat in the middle, holding her gun.
She waits there for what feels like an eternity, although it's probably more like twenty minutes.
Britta starts to drift off, she's been awake for almost 24 hours waiting out this game. Just as she's about to close her eyes, a rattling startles her awake.
She jumps out of her chair, aiming her gun at various points in the room.
"Who's there?" She asks, slowly turning in a circle. She can't see anyone in the halls and no ones jumping down from the ceiling (yes that has happened). She's about to sit back down when Annie pushes herself out of the air vent.
"What the hell?" Britta yells, backing up and keeping her gun pointed at Annie. Annie stands up and immediately runs towards the windows while yelling at Britta not to shoot her.
"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't." Britta says, raising her eyebrow and trying to sound tough. She keeps a close eye on Annie hands, making sure they don't start to reach for the gun tucked into the waistband of her skirt.
Annie continues scurrying around closing the blinds.
"Because," She says, pausing to finish her self appointed task. "I have a plan."
She smirks at Britta, who's still pointing the gun at her.
"Oh really? And is that plan to trap me in here with you so you can kill me?"
Annie moves a small shelf in front of the vent, then turns back to Britta, "Well I don't really have it all planned out yet. But I know that's definitely not part of it."
"You can put your gun down now." She says, crossing her arms and pursing her lips.
Britta scowls at her, lowering her gun but keeping both hands on it.
"Ugh, fine." Annie moves her hand slowly towards her waist band and pulls her gun out. Britta's hands shoot back up, her gun tracking Annie's movements as she sets her weapon on the ground.
"Happy?" She asks, taking a few steps away from it.
Britta doesn't reply, just slowly puts her gun on the ground as well, keeping her eyes glued to Annie.
They stand there in silence for a minute, both of them waiting for the other to try something.
Eventually Britta decides can't take the silence anymore.
"Okay, what's your plan?" She asks, crossing her arms.
"I think we should team up against Pierce."
~
After minimal cajoling, Britta agrees to split the prize money and team up with Annie. It'll still be enough to cover her rent, and maybe even another groupon, she's been thinking about getting an oxygen facial lately.
"So, now that I agreed to help you take down Pierce, you ready to share with me how we're actually gonna do for this?" Britta asks, sitting cross legged on the floor next to Annie, their guns pushed to the side of them.
"I'm not sure yet..." Annie answers, dragging out the "I'm" as her voice becomes higher, a tick Britta's learned means she's kind of freaking out.
"I risk my life for you, and you still don't have a freaking plan?"
Annie rolls her eyes, "You realize your life is not actually at stake here, right?"
"Yes, but my rent is!"
"That's your fault for buying shitty groupons! Was the five dollars off soul cycle even worth it?" Annie adds annoyingly aggressive quotation marks around soul cycle, like it's not a legitimate thing.
"It's not just exercise for your body, it's exercise for your mind !"
They've started yelling probably a little too loudly - Britta wouldn't be surprised if Pierce found out where they were. They stand there staring at each other, Britta's pretty sure Annie could kill someone with her eyes if she tried hard enough.
"Okay, let's just calm down and find a way to kick Pierce's ass."
"I don't think it will be that hard, we could probably just find him and kill him."
Britta wants to disagree with her, because that is literally the shittiest plan she's ever heard. It's not even really a plan at all, but she really wants this to be over with so she decides to suck it up and go with it.
"Okay, let's go find Pierce."
The hallways are destroyed, posters are torn down and the walls are barely visible. Britta reminds herself to come back and help the cleaning staff or at least give them a generous tip. Despite what people think she's not just all talk.
"Where do you think he is?" Annie asks, surveying their surroundings with her gun up.
"I feel like he's just taking a nap somewhere, and that's the only reason he's still alive."
Annie considers this for a minute, "That makes sense."
They keep walking, almost back to back.
"Let's check the cafeteria first." Britta says, taking a sharp turn in that direction.
The cafeteria is dead empty, just like the rest of the school. They check in all the corners, behind all of the tables and counters. Pierce is nowhere to be found, which Annie is kind of relieved about. She hasn't really mentally prepared herself for the intense face off that's bound to happen.
"Where next?" Annie asks, kicking a chair aside to see if anyone was behind it.
"No idea." Britta says, turning to leave. Annie follows her, struggling a little to keep up.
They're roaming the halls when they hear a door slam, they both turn in the direction of the sound to find nothing there. Britta starts making random motions with her hands, that Annie's sure have absolutely no meaning.
"What does that mean?" Annie whisper yells, gripping her gun tighter. They're both frozen staring in the direction of the noise.
"Hey guys."
Annie lets out a small scream at the feel of a hand on her shoulder. Britta would deny it but she definitely jumped a little bit.
"Abed!" Britta says when they turn around, "What are you doing here?"
"Troy and I decided this is an optimal time for playing hide and seek." He says, Britta glares at him. Normally, she wouldn't question that but she doesn't trust anyone right now. She doesn't even fully trust Annie yet.
"Oh really?" She asks, crossing her arms. It's better to look tough then be on defense, she decides.
"Yup. I have no idea where he is though."
Britta glances at Annie, who gives her a look that says she believes him. Britta doesn't know when she got so good at reading Annie's expressions. She's an easy person to read, Britta tells herself.
"Okay, well if you're not gonna help us then" Annie makes a shooing motion with her hand.
"See you later." He says, moving past them. Before he turns the corner, he turns back towards them and says, "Helping others when you're dead isn't allowed, so I'm not gonna tell you that Pierce is in Chang's room."
Britta pushes back a smile, "Thank you, Abed for not telling us that." Annie nods along with her.
"It was needed to move the plot along faster." Abed says before leaving.
~
"Are you ready for this?" Britta asks, staring at Annie. They're standing on either side of Chang's door, Annie glances in through the window. She can see Pierce covered in a blanket from god knows where and her and Britta have been quietly fighting over the best plan of attack for at least five minutes. Finally, they had decided on just running in and shooting him, which really should have been an easier conclusion to come to.
"Yes." Annie says, getting the competitive glint in her eyes that Britta has only seen on the rarest occasion, an occasion usually involving grades.
They burst through the door, guns firing at the blob on asleep at a desk. Before they've even gotten five shots in, the figure sits up to reveal that it's Chang.
"Ha!" He yells, "You've been Chang'd!"
Annie and Britta freeze, guns still pointing at Chang. Britta's cursing under her breath, and turns around just in time to see Pierce step out of the dark corner behind the door.
"I told you, we were gonna say they got Pierced. All you did was pretend to be asleep." Pierce says, his gun pointing at the ground.
Annie doesn't waste any time, "Freeze!" She points her gun at him and Britta follows suit.
Pierce finally wakes up and points his gun at both of them.
"You can't shoot both of us at the same time." Britta says, moving so both hands are holding her gun.
"And shouldn't you be disqualified? You're not allowed help from the dead." Annie says, eyeing the bright pink splatter of paint on Chang's shoulder.
"Oh, I wasn't helping him." Chang says, leaning back on the chair and crossing his arms, "I was just having a nice nap in my own classroom."
Annie makes a noise of disapproval and turns her full attention towards Pierce, who starts moving his hand to the trigger.
"You shoot I shoot." Britta says, Annie pretends not to notice the way Britta ever so slightly steps in front of her.
"Well, I guess we're gonna be here for a while then." Pierce says, unfazed.
"Well I guess we are." Annie says, straightening her posture.
They stand there for less than a minute before Chang gets up and leaves, "See you guys later. I'm bored."
None of them look in his direction, stuck in dead stares with each other.
Eventually, Annie whispers, "I have a plan."
"Oh so now you have a plan." Britta says, too focused on her witty response to realize how loud she's being. Pierce raises an eyebrow.
"It's weird. And kind of offensive." She says, her voice taking on that squeaky tone again.
Britta contemplates for a second, she has no idea what Annie's thinking. But how bad can it really be?
"Okay. Go for it." Britta says, then feels Annie's hands on her cheek. And suddenly she's turning towards Annie, whose lips are against her own and oh shit . Okay this is cool, Britta has a lesbian friend so she can deal with kissing girls and ignore the way her heart stops beating for a second.
It's not until she hears Pierce make a gross comment that she realizes what the point of this is. So Britta gets her shit together and pulls away from Annie, shooting Pierce in the chest and leaving a splattering of blue on his ugly old man shirt.
She shoots him a couple more times, "That's for the lesbians!" She says, before putting down her gun and turning back to Annie.
They high five each other, both their hearts racing.
"Nice plan, you're really good at -" Britta pauses glancing down at Annie's lips as her face starts to heat up, "distracting Pierce." She finishes.
"Thanks." Annie says smiling, "You're really good at distracting Pierce too."
~
After the celebration has died down and prize money has been distributed, Annie corners Britta in the hallway.
"So, we make a really good team." She says, gripping the straps of her backpack she had retrieved from the study room.
"Yeah, we do." Britta says, smiling at her. She should stop smiling so much, it's ruining her rep.
"We should maybe, figure out another time to, um distract Pierce." Annie adds in a cheesy wink that makes Britta smile again. Goddammit.
"That would be cool." Britta says, "Although you'd have to let me take you out for drinks first." She congratulates herself on the smoothness of that line.
"I think I could deal with that." Annie says, then continues walking.
Britta stands there stupidly, then Annie doubles back.
"Just to confirm we are talking about like kissing right not actually doing anything involving Pierce?" She asks.
Britta snaps out of the weird trance she had been in for those two Annie-less seconds, "Yes, yeah. No Pierce. At all, ever."
"Okay, cool, good."
Annie actually walks away this time, leaving Britta alone with her thoughts. It only takes three dates for Britta to realize that she, is in fact the lesbian friend.