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Guy Wood is nervous. He's never even been with a girl before Carol and now he's about to meet her parents for the first time over Christmas dinner. He struggles with his tie as Carol enters the bedroom.
"Baby do you need a hand with that?" Carol is looking radiant as ever, her short blonde bob slightly tousled as she's not long out of the shower and wearing a beautiful red dress. She jokes about him being so good with his hands yet he finds trouble doing up a tie. "Aw thanks Carol, nobody wears ties in Procter and also I'm super nervous for today is all. I ain't never made nice with a lady's momma and poppa before, what if they ain't fond of me?" Carol reaches up to hold Guy's face and brings him down to her level so she can look into his beautiful brown eyes, "honey if they don't like you then they're literally crazy, you are the sweetest kindest person I've ever met. I mean you literally built me a car the day we met at the hot cocoa festival." "Yeah I'm sorry it caught on fire on account of the wood and all, the second one was much stronger", Carol chuckles as she plants a kiss on her gentle giant's surprisingly soft lips, "Come on Big Guy, finish getting ready because people will be arriving soon."
Guy smiles at Carol before his face switches to a more concerned expression, "is...is he gonna be there?" Carol knew this might be a touchy issue with Guy, there was still a little one sided tension between him and Scott since they initially competed for Carol's affections, she reassures Guy, "listen I know part of you still thinks Scott is going to steal me away from you but you know he's happy with Charlie now. And even if he wasn't his mom married my dad so nothing would ever happen anyway. My heart is yours alone my big teddy bear" Guy smiles again and she gives him another quick kiss.
Soon there's a knock at the door and Guy suddenly gets even more nervous than before. He puts on his best friendly face as Carol answers the door, "hi daddy hi mom merry Christmas" she welcomes her guests with a big warm hug and turns to introduce them to Guy, "Guy this is my father Christopher and my stepmother Sophia, you guys this is my boyfriend Guy Wood." Guy stumbles a little as he reaches out his large hand to greet Carol's parents, "mighty nice to finally meet you Mr Christopher sir," "Oh please call me Pop all my friends do, and if Carol likes you that makes you a friend of mine young man. Can I ask where you're from?" "Uh Procter sir- uh I mean Pop, it's a very small town with not a lot of people" Pop chuckles "they must build them big in Procter, you're a regular Paul Bunyan" Guy let's out a nervous laugh, "thank you sir, I don't right understand the reference but you said it all friendly like." Pop is slightly perplexed at this response until Carol jumps in "Guy told me there wasn't much reading material growing up in Procter so he doesn't really know the American folk heroes daddy" Pop has an understanding expression on his rosy face. Guy has been self conscious about his large frame ever since moving to Kringletown but now more than ever he was aware of how huge he really is. Pop is a diminutive 5'2 portly fellow and his wife Sophia is even smaller although her large beehive hairdo makes up a lot of the difference. Pop suddenly has a look of recognition, "Wait a second I recognize you, you're the fella that built that lovely gazebo in front of the church. That's some mighty fine work son." Guy blushes a little, "Aw thank you Pop, I'm mighty proud of my woodworking it's one of the only things I'm good at" "Oh now that can't be true, you're clearly a very capable young man you just need to believe in yourself more." Guy isn't used to his work being praised and even less so being told to believe in himself, "thank you sir that's mighty kind of you to say."
Guy suddenly realizes he hadn't greeted Sophia and not wanting to feel rude he quickly shakes her hand too, practically lifting her off the ground with his enthusiastic vigor. "Oh I'm so sorry ma'am I don't right know my own strength and you're so small you see, if I hurt you I do apologize" Sophia laughs with Pop, "Oh don't worry about it young man, I may be old but it'll take more than a quick shake around to take me down," she turns her attention to Carol, "Carol darling would you mind helping me carry the vat from the cab into the kitchen? The man driving the taxi isn't exactly being helpful." Carol chuckles "mom I'm not surprised, I'm surprised he even let you put it in his cab in the first place. I can't run down right now I have to take the food out of the oven before it dries out" Guy speaks up "if it's lifting something heavy I'll grab it for you ma'am, it'll be not a bother for a fella like me." Sophia adjusts her thick coke bottle glasses and smiles, "well that would be lovely Guy thank you, what a sweet young man you are." Carol gives him a hug and thanks him for taking this errand that would've been a labor for Carol and her mother to undertake. Guy heads down to the cab with some money Carol slipped in his pocket to give the poor cab driver a generous tip and returns carrying a large vat of hot cocoa with one arm, not hot enough to burn him but enough to warm him on this very Chilly morning.
Once he gets back in the house he delivers the vat into the kitchen as directed and receives a handful of hard candy from Sophia as thanks. As he goes to eat one the door goes again, Carol opens it to reveal Scott Ornamente and Charlie Penn, recently returned from a trip to New York. "Scott Charlie merry Christmas," she greets the partners with a hug as Guy hangs back a little. Scott notices Guy acting apprehensive and decides to address the elephant in the room with his typical tact "Guy Wood you big old goofball you still think I'm gonna steal your girl? Listen amigo that ship has long since sailed and sank, I know I pursued her for a while after she rejected me but once she made it clear that door was shut I backed off and fell into the well toned arms of my boy Charlie here." All 4 people look awkward at this blunt exposition and Scott swallow his pride, "that was just a joke, I tried to diffuse the tension and only ended up creating more. I'm sorry everyone." Scott's recognition of his error removes the lingering awkwardness from the air and Charlie chimes in, "Scottie you're such a knucklehead, how you ever got me to say yes I'll never know" as he gives Scott a kiss and a playful shove. Guy is still tentative but he approaches Scott with his hand outreached, "you're a real funny guy Scott, real knee slapper," as he squeezes Scott's hand just a little too hard before releasing his grip.
As Scott and Charlie head into the living room Carol checks on Guy in the hall, "Sweetie are you OK? I know Scott has all the charms of a brick but he really has changed. He didn't get to you did he?" Guy looks sheepishly down at the ground, "I know he probably dont mean no harm or nothing but I still can't believe that a girl as great as you chose a big dummy like me over a successful guy like Scott or a sweet guy like Charlie. I don't really feel like I deserve you and part of me always worries that one day you'll realize your mistake and run away before it's too late." Carol is very sympathetic about Guy's insecurities, this is the first relationship he's ever had so it must be scary to feel like it could end at any moment. She kisses him and gives him a nice hug "Come on big Guy, let's get some of mom's hot cocoa before dinner gets underway."
At the dinner table Guy struggles to come up with something to say so he decides to just go for something, "uh Pop if you don't mind my asking Carol introduced your wife as her stepmother and I ain't a particular smart fella but I know what that implies, what happened to Carol's real momma?" This question cuts through the air like a knife, Carol and Pop share a sad expression and Sophia looks hurt by the implication that she can't be Carol's 'real' mother. Scott and Charlie sit stunned too scared to say anything. Guy immediately realizes his mistake and is incredibly apologetic, "I'm so sorry I didn't mean to bring it up like that or hurt y'all I imagine it's a very sore spot so you don't got to tell me if you don't wanna." Pop holds Carol's hand, "it's OK Guy you didn't know, it was the phrasing that hurt not the actual question. Carol's mother Mary was my high school sweetheart and the shining light of my life. We had many great years together before she got sick when Carol was a little girl, she was a heck of a fighter and battled it for years until eventually she was too tired to keep fighting and accepted that her time was up. She went peacefully when Carol was 16." Pop pauses in reflection before continuing, "I never thought I would find love again until I met Sophia, I was initially very resistant to opening myself up again as I felt it was disrespectful to Mary to move on but Sophia understood how I was feeling as she had also lost her husband Bernard, Scott's father, so we moved at a slow pace and eventually we reached a place of healing where we accepted that Mary and Bernard wouldn't want us to wallow around closed off from the world and we found love and kinship that got us out of our darkest days and brought our families together. Take my word Guy, Sophia is as much Carol's 'real' mother as Mary was."
Guy feels terrible for asking such an insensitive question, he has accidentally hurt everyone at the table apart from Charlie who also lost his wife as Guy recalls from the night of the hot cocoa festival. "That's a mighty sad story Pop, I ain't never even knew my momma and poppa so I can't even imagine how hard that was for y'all. Miss Sophia I really didn't mean nothing by what I said, I'm sure you're an incredible mom to Carol. And Carol darlin I am so sorry for being so dang stupid to say somethin like that." Guy pauses for a second, "and Scott I'm sorry you lost your daddy, I'm sure that must've been hard on you." Scott gives a quiet nod and Charlie wraps his arm around him and gently kisses his forehead.
Interrupting the lingering silence in the room is another knock at the door, Carol wipes her tears away and goes to answer it. At the door is Father O'Donnell from the local church, going door to door to personally spread the Christmas spirit, "ah Carol merry Christmas to you and yours" he says in his cheerful Irish accent. "Hello Father merry Christmas to you as well" Carol responds attempting to match his holiday cheer despite what just occurred at the dinner table. The good Father notices that she's been crying, "Oh my child why the tears? Christmas should be a wonderful time of joy and happiness, what's got you so crestfallen?" The Father hands her a tissue for her running makeup, "Oh it's nothing, my boyfriend accidentally hit a sensitive spot about my late mother is all." Father O'Donnell nods and places a comforting hand on her shoulder, "ah yes Mary was such a good woman, she was one of the most enthusiastic volunteers in the church. Well I'm sure your man meant nothing harmful by it. He was probably just nervous of the occasion. How is your father, is he keeping well?" "Yes Father he's very well, incredibly spry for his age." "That's lovely to hear, if he's looking to make some new friends be sure to tell him about the church's football team for ages 60+" "I'll do that Father thank you and bless you." The Father smiles, "bless you my child, now I'll get out of your hair I have a lot more houses to visit this day before the holiday service."
As Carol returns to the dining room the mood seems to have lifted after Guy's slip up. Guy still looks very nervous and ashamed but Pop is smiling again so that's a good sign. Upon seeing Carol Guy's face lightens up and he suggests giving out presents. Carol looks a little confused, "Guy we normally do presents after dinner not during it." Guy looks more nervous than ever, "I'm sorry it's just the way of things in Procter, if you folks would prefer to wait until later may I give mine now? It's just the one and it's for Carol, I promise I won't take long and y'all can get back to your eatin." Guy produces a small hastily wrapped parcel from his coat and presents it to Carol, she unwraps it to reveal a box, "go ahead Carol open it" Guy gestures with his giant hands towards the little box.
Carol opens the box and gasps. A ring, a beautiful shiny ring looks back at her. When she looks up Guy is on one knee, almost at eye level with Carol at full height. Guy pulls out a piece of paper and starts reading.
"I ain't skilled with words or nothing but here goes. Carol my darlin I was stuck on you from the moment I first saw you and made you bleed on accident. That night at the hot cocoa festival changed my life forever. I never had no lady attention in Procter so I thought it was just for the city folk until I met you. You made me realize there was more to life than building gazebos for 20 dollars. I wanna spend as much time with you as you'll give me." He struggles to read the rest due to his own awful handwriting, he ditches the paper and continues," Carol I love you so much it hurts, I originally came to Kringletown to get my momma a faucet, and you opened the faucet in my heart and it's never stopped flowin love ever since. I want to be with you more than anything, will you please be my bride?"
Carol is fully sobbing," yes yes of course I will, I love you so much Guy Wood my big teddy bear, " Guy scoops her up in his arms and she kisses him so deeply as their guests get up from the table to congratulate the couple.
Carol looks at the ring newly crowning her finger and asks, "when did you even get this ring Guy?" Guy smiles, "I asked the old Father at the church to help me pick it out a few weeks back." Carol remembered Father O'Donnell saying Guy was "nervous of the occasion" with a twinkle in his eye and chuckled before kissing Guy again.