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Stede sat on their newly acquired chase, trying not to panic.
Not because he had killed someone, no, he had kind of gotten over that after a few raids and coming to terms with his hand in the death of the Badminton twins. No, he was panicking because of how easy it actually was. It was so easy to be the one to step in front of Ed to protect him for a change. It was easy to channel his absolute hatred of bullies at a single target. It was so easy to send a man to Davy Jones with a little flick and flourish of the wrist to marvelous applause.
It was also too easy to lose Ed. Again.
They had been boarded all too easy. The capture, the torture, the near death, it all was too easy. He didn’t upend his entire life only to lose Ed while on the precipice of the kind of love he had only dared to desire in his deepest dreams. Hearing him screaming around a red hot poker, seeing him stretched on a rack and insisting on defiance til the end…
The end was much closer than he wanted to believe. If it weren’t for his smooth talking and encouraging of “positive work environments”, they would have been goners. At first, he had wanted to be alone to have his little break down in peace but once he had closed the door and sat down he wanted nothing more than the comfort of Ed’s presence.
The sound of knocking at the door shook him from his thoughts.
His feet moved him almost without thought. Then the door was open and Ed was looking at him with concern and he knew Ed was speaking but his words were falling on deaf ears as a sudden rush of pure want coursed through him. Before he could think better of it, he reached out to fist his hands in Ed’s leather lapels and drag him into the room.
Surprise filled Ed’s eyes and he moved with Stede as Stede pushed him towards the nearest wall. With a thunk, they landed with Ed staring back at him with a kaleidoscope of emotion on his face. The question from Stede was silent, a small twitch of an eyebrow and a slight parting of his own lips. Ed’s reply was silent, a tiny twitch of a nod and then they moved towards each other in unison, lips meeting as Stede falling into him as he reached up to cup Ed’s head.
Their breath mingled, coming in pants and gasps as their arms wrapped around each other and hands wandered into uncharted territories. Stede couldn’t help himself, he moaned into their kisses, teasing Ed’s lips apart with his tongue before he dipped it inside to taste him. He tasted of rum and pineapple, the cocktails Roach had made for that evening’s party.The sugar-sweet kisses drew him in like a hummingbird and he drank deeply. Ed’s answering moans and whines were almost enough to live off of, he could swear that this was all his needed in the world.
Their bodies slid together and Stede was suddenly aware that he was painfully hard in his trousers - and so was Ed. That thought alone is what made him pull back, both of them breathing hard, their lips reddened from kissing.
Eyes still closed, Ed’s head fell back and his body slumped heavily into the wall behind him, seeming to savor their activities. This left Ed’s neck was exposed deliciously and never had Stede’s mouth watered so desperately for another human’s skin between his lips and teeth. After a moment, Ed’s eyes opened and found Stede’s in the dim light.
“Not that I’m complaining,” Ed said softly, a smile tugging at his lips, “but what did I do to deserve that kind of welcome?”
Stede reached up to tuck a stray strand of hair behind Ed’s ear and he smile at him fondly. He could tell him everything that was swirling in his head moments before, he could tell him how he felt the acidic rise of panic in his throat when he thought that they were about to die, again, without having truly loved Ed in all the ways he longed to do. He could do that…perhaps in the morning.
For the moment, he simply smiled shyly, pushing all his thoughts down, and asked, “does there need to be one?” Ed’s parted, a soft gasp barely audible escaping him, and he shook his head. As their breathing returned some blood returned to his head and he remembered why he stopped in the first place.
“I know you said to take it slow and I respect that. But whimsy has once again guided me and I find that I am…” he paused, trying to find the appropriate and polite word to describe it.
“Horny?”
Stede blushed and giggled. “Well, I was trying for something more gentlemanly but yes. Yes, that would be the long and short of it.”
“Well, long or short? Which is it?” Ed said, chuckling at his own dick joke.
“Wouldn’t you like to know,” Stede quipped back, laughing before covering his own mouth as if he could shove the words back in. “In your own time, of course. I don’t want to make you feel pressured or rushed and abstaining is nothing new to me-”
“Let me stop you there,” Ed said, reaching out to gently cover Stede’s lips with his hand. Then he leaned in until their noses nearly touched. “If I want you to stop, I’ll say so.” He touched their foreheads together and Stede leaned into it and closed his eyes, relishing the contact. Ed moved his hand away and said, “kiss me again.”
Stede turned his head ever so slightly to slot their lips together in a slow, tender kiss. He melted into Ed again, wrapping his arms around his lower back while Ed threw his own around Stede’s neck. This time their kiss was short as Stede began to trail small kisses across Ed’s face toward his neck. He restrained himself, stopping at one kiss to the underside of Ed’s jaw near his ear. He felt Ed shudder against him and he couldn’t hold back a quiet whine in response. He had never had such a response to his touches and kisses before and he could see how such a thing could become addicting.
He forced himself to pull back once more and catch Ed’s eyes. He had to be sure that Ed wanted this.
“Do you,” Stede asked, suddenly nervous. “Do you want to take this further? Tonight?” His whole body vibrated with need and it yearned for Ed but if the answer was no he would respect it. He would content himself with a quick trip to the ensuite where he would “take care of it” before composing himself.
“Yes, Stede,” he replied.
“Oh, thank heavens,” he Stede said before sinking back into him for another kiss. Ed’s hands came to clutch at his arms, dragging him in as they kissed. The speed ramped up, and soon Ed was tugging at Stede’s shirt.
“Take this off,” he said. “I want to look at you.”
Stede grinned. “You’ve seen me already,” he said, tugging the shirt from his trousers. “I’m not that interesting to look at, nothing like the work of art you are.”
Ed smiled, eyes glazed over with want. “There’s always time to fill you up with tattoos, if that’s what you want.” A little flutter of hope and relief mingled with the arousal in Stede’s body. There was time for tattoos, there was time for teasing, there was time for kissing and everything else they could want from each other. Ed touched Stede’s bare chest with his fingertips, seeming to delight in the quick hitch in Stede’s breath. For a moment, Ed’s eyes flared with anger when they settled on the still raw and throbbing part of Stede’s chest that had been burned that evening. Stede tipped his chin up to draw him away from the ugliness of the wound to another kiss as a balm for his anger.
“You can tattoo over that another time, if you wish. Erase it, take care of me. But for tonight, let me take care of you, Ed. And you deserve so much more than a fumble against the wall.”
He turned them and lead Ed to the bed, gently laying him down on the mattress before he turned to draw the curtain. It wouldn’t do much to hide their bodies but it gave the illusion of deepened privacy. Roach’s fireworks lit up the room, purple and green and gold blooming on Ed’s skin as he looked out the window at the spectacle. The crew cheered above them and Frenchie kept playing his music and for a moment Stede felt a little bad to leave such a good party early.
But the crew deserved their time to let their hair down and so did Ed and Stede.
Stede knelt on the bed, kissing the top of Ed’s head to draw his attention back to him. “What would you like? We can still take things slow, if you like. No need to do the whole shebang tonight.”
Ed snorted, “shebang?”
“You know what I mean,” Stede said, feeling his cheeks heat again. “Would you like me to touch you? Taste you? Do you want me inside you or you in me?”
“You’d be up for that?”
“I’m up for anything you’re comfortable with, anything your heart desires.”
Ed seemed to contemplate that. While he thought, Stede gave him space but maintaining their intimacy by taking Ed’s hand to kiss his knuckles, his fingertips, his wrist, infusing love and warmth into every gesture.
“I think,” Ed said, breaking the silence. Stede looked up at him as he continued, “I’d like to feel you inside me. I want to hold you close and deep.” He chuckled a little, “it’s been a while since I’ve let anyone get that close to me, let them fuck me. Not since I became captain. Ruined the Blackbeard vibe to take it in the ass.”
Stede felt a pang of pity, shrugging it off in favor of pride that Ed trusted him enough to let him give him pleasure in a way he had denied himself for so long.
“I’ve never done this with a man,” he confessed. “I never knew that it was an option.”
Ed’s toothy grin sent a shiver down Stede’s spine. “Best get on it, Bonnet.”
Another extended, heavy kiss and then they parted so Stede could locate something to open Ed up and ease his way. Luckily, they had been able to replace some of his fancy potions and cosmetics and in the process they had acquired some coconut oil. Originally intended for his hair and future use as a lotion, it was finding itself a new use on the tips of Stede’s fingers. They both stripped down until there was nothing but dim, colorful light splashed on their skin. Ed laid back against the pillows and he spread his legs to let Stede settle between. After a moment of situating, Stede dipped two of his fingers into the oil to coat them in the viscous liquid.
Hovering over Ed while bracing on one arm, Stede reached between Ed’s legs and said, “can I touch you, here?”
“Wish you would,” Ed said, canting his hips tantalizingly.
Stede circled Ed’s hole, spreading the oil around. Ed’s contented sigh at the contact put Stede’s mind at ease that he was on the right track there. After a moment, he eased a single finger in slowly until he was fully seated. Ed was hot around his finger, clenching down on him so tightly that Stede marveled at how he could ever manage more than a few pathetic pumps. He knew sliding into this would be nearly enough on its own to send him over the edge.
Chill the fuck out, Bonnet , he scolded himself.
He gently thrust his finger in and out of Ed in an easy rhythm to build him up for more. When Ed’s hips began rising to meet his hand he added a second finger. The second one got a deeper moan from Ed and he reached out to grip onto Stede’s arm. When Stede moved to stop Ed shook his head and thrust his hips into Stede’s hand to keep their previous rhythm. Stede watched in awe as Ed let himself go, fully feeling everything Stede was doing to him.
Keeping his fingers moving he leaned in to suck kisses into Ed’s neck, feeling as Ed clenched around him whenever he hit a particularly sensitive spot.
“Fuck, Stede…”
“In a moment, darling,” Stede joked. When Ed laughed in response, Stede’s cock twitched in sympathy. He tried not to imagine what it might feel like to feel Ed laugh from within. With a groan of his own he added a third finger.
Within moments, Ed was practically begging for Stede to fuck him already.
“Please, Stede,” he panted. “You’re gonna finger my brains out,” he warned.
“Well,” Stede said with a smirk, removing his fingers. “Can’t have that can we?” He applied more oil to his own cock before lining himself up with Ed’s hole. “Ready, love?”
Ed nodded his head against the pillow. “Been ready.”
Without another word, Stede pushed himself into Ed’s pliant body and they both moaned aloud as Stede slid home. Stede curled himself into Ed, simply enjoying the tight heat for a moment while he buried his face in Ed’s neck. Breathing harshly, taking in Ed’s scent and feeling every inch of his skin alight with pleasure, he was hard pressed to come up with anything else that had made him feel so alive.
Ed ground his hips into Stede’s, reminding him of his duty.
He slowly pulled out before sliding back in again, grinding his hips each time they met Ed’s, drawing keens and moans from Ed. Stede couldn’t help himself, he needed to taste those moans for himself. He trailed kisses and licks up Ed’s neck until their lips met and he felt Ed’s fingers slide into his hair, tugging at the roots. While they kissed, Ed’s legs wrapped around Stede’s middle, encouraging him to move faster.
“Fuck off, you’ve never done this before,” Ed said between groans.
“Swear on my life.” He reached down to grab Ed’s leg and throw it over his shoulder to get even deeper. He knew he hit something he had only ever read about in books when Ed’s head flew back and his nails raked down his back.
“Fuck, fuck, Stede,” he cried out, “don’t stop!”
Stede never was able to deny him a thing. Stede kept his pace up, knowing his own end was near but wanted to see Ed reach his end first. He wanted to feel the evidence of Ed’s pleasure around him and splattered on their chests and taste it in the air and on his tongue.
“That’s it, darling,” Stede coaxed, “let me see you. Let me see you come.” When he reached down to take Ed in hand it was only a matter of a few strokes before Ed was keening, clutching, and coming apart beneath Stede. Stede slowed momentarily, wanting Ed to catch his breath but Ed would have none of that.
“Come on, Stede,” he urged. “You too, you too.”
Stede nodded, knowing that he was nearing his own peak. He held Ed close while he lost himself, thrusting quickly until he, too, was filling Ed with his seed. Not wanting to crush his love, Stede braced himself on his knees and forearms, breathing rapidly in the aftermath. Within moments, he had tipped to the side, snuggling along Ed’s body.
The bed was not large but to Stede that was now part of the draw. There was nowhere their bodies weren’t touching and it was incredibly grounding and comforting to Stede. He threw an arm and leg over him, pulling Ed into him tightly and planting lazy kisses along Ed’s shoulder.
When they finally returned to themselves, Ed rolled onto his side to clutch onto Stede. He felt wetness against his neck and was suddenly fearful. “Ed, darling? Are you alright?” A shudder against him told him that Ed was crying but trying desperately not to. Gently, he pushed his head back from his neck to discover Ed’s eyes glassy with tears. “Oh love,” he cooed, “what’s wrong? Did I do something to hurt you?”
Ed swallowed thickly and shook his head. “No, no nothing like that.” He took a deep breath, wiping at his eyes with the back of his hand. “I just…I…that was just nice,” he said with a sniffle.
“Okay,” Stede acknowledged softly. “I can’t say I’ve brought anyone to tears with my lovemaking before.”
“That’s just it,” Ed said, getting himself back under control. He hid his face in Stede’s neck again. “Lovemaking is a new feeling, mate. S’a big feeling.”
“Ah,” Stede replied, stroking Ed’s hair. “Wanna talk it through?”
Ed chuckled wetly, “I think we can leave the crew out of this one.”
Stede laughed softly. “We can definitely leave the crew out of it.” Another pop of gunpowder and glittering of color outside the window told him the party was still in full swing. “Besides, think they’re occupied.”
“Definitely occupied,” Ed agreed.
After several moments of being burrowed in Stede’s neck he finally came up for air and Stede looked at him, pouring as much love as he possibly could into his gaze. He wanted to say the words he had been keeping behind his teeth for far too long and so he did. “I love you, Ed.” He knew he wasn’t going to get an “I love you” back. Ed wasn’t quite there yet. But Stede could feel his love anyway.
Instead, Ed simply kissed him and suggested they turn in for the night. After all, they were headed to the Republic of Pirates and it would be a very long day once they had docked. With a final goodnight kiss, Ed rolled over and “let” Stede be the big spoon. Stede wrapped his arms around him, pulling him into a tight, comforting embrace. His last thoughts before he finally drifted off was how he was never happier to be exactly where he was than right there and then.
For the first time, he had no doubts about where he was supposed to be and that he was wanted.