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To the untrained eye, there is nothing immediately out of the ordinary about the morgue that would suggest it’s haunted. The funeral parlor located on the main floor has chipped paint on the walls and dark, hardwood flooring that creaks more often than it doesn’t, but that alone isn’t an indication of a haunting. Lots of perfectly normal, boring places are in need of a fresh coat of paint or new floors. According to the owner of the morgue, this place has been in his family for at least four generations now, so it’s understandable that it’s looking a little run down.
“Seems fine to me,” Lan Jingyi says.
“There is definitely something very wrong here,” Wei Ying says. Jingyi gives him a skeptical look. Normally, he would be with Lan Zhan doing boring things like official investigations or paperwork or whatever else detectives do when not solving crimes. More paperwork, probably. There always seems to be paperwork. Today, though, Lan Zhan is teaching in Cloud Recesses, something he’s been doing more often now that Lan Huan has officially taken over sect leader duties. When Wei Ying mentioned he’d taken some freelance work checking out a morgue that recently developed a haunting problem, his husband suggested taking Jingyi along.
“I mean, it’s old,” Jingyi says. He’s frowning in that adorable Lan fashion. It’s cute.
“Lots of buildings are old,” Wei Ying dismisses. “Being old doesn’t mean a place is haunted. One of the most serious hauntings I ever dealt with was in a brand new office building. The CEO’s late wife had some kind of grudge against the business. Anyway, the problem isn’t that this place is old, it’s that it’s quiet. Way too quiet.” He would say it’s dead silent but in Wei Ying’s experience the dead in morgue’s are never silent. Most of them are still coming to terms with the fact that they’re dead and won’t shut up about it. A bottle of painkillers is tucked into the pocket of his jacket specifically for the headache he usually gets if he has to spend more than thirty minutes in a morgue. Being able to hear spirits has its uses, sure, but Wei Ying wouldn’t be upset if that particular side effect of having been briefly dead (by legal definitions) ever wears off.
Jingyi’s expression remains skeptical. “It just seems like a normal morgue to me.”
“And just how many morgues have you been in?” Considering that Jingyi is a cultivator, the answer wouldn’t be zero, but he’s also still a junior disciple. Most of his night hunting experience is related to whatever cases land on Lan Zhan’s desk.
"Like, real, actual morgues?"
Wei Ying arches an eyebrow and gestures for Jingyi to follow him down into the basement. "As opposed to fake morgues?" Jingyi is fascinating. No wonder Lan Zhan keeps him around and A-Yuan is making friends with him. "Yes, real, actual morgues."
"Uh, just Dr. Wen's. So one." Jingyi looks around the empty space and Wei Ying can see that he's really trying. "Is this not what morgues usually look like?"
"It's not about how the morgue looks," Wei Ying explains. "It's about the fact that this morgue is empty."
"Well, the owner did say that they're currently doing renovations."
Wei Ying gives Jingyi a flat look. "Yes, I was there when he told us that. When I say empty, I’m not referring to physical bodies. I mean there aren't any spirits here."
"Maybe they left with their bodies?"
"A reasonable guess, but incorrect." Wei Ying starts to walk a slow circle around the room. "In general, ghosts like to stick close to their bodies, but a lot of them are still in denial when their body ends up in a morgue. I knew one ghost who refused to leave the morgue for five years.”
“Five years?” Jingyi exclaims, looking utterly bewildered. Wei Ying laughs.
“I know! He was there so long the morgue owner had to hire me to shoo him along! Ghosts like that convince themselves that if they don’t ever leave the morgue then they don’t have to admit they’re dead. Which is wild! Like, sir! You don’t have a body anymore! It’s rotting in the ground!” Wei Ying shakes his head, smiling. “Anyway, every morgue I’ve ever been in- which is a lot- has been so noisy I end up with a headache within thirty minutes of setting foot inside. The moment they realize I can hear them they all start competing to see who can be the loudest complainer in the room. Very annoying. This morgue, however, is completely silent.”
"Oh." Jingyi scratches the back of his head. "So, can you just... hear ghosts? Like they can just talk to you and you understand them?"
"Basically, yeah." Wei Ying wanders over to the freezer drawers and opens one, finding it empty. Which is exactly how it's supposed to be, since the entire morgue is meant to be undergoing renovations right now, but Wei Ying can't shake the feeling that he and Jingyi aren't alone in here. "Comes with having been briefly dead. By legal definitions, at least."
"What does that mean?"
"It means there's a death certificate with my name on it in the public records." Wei Ying opens another freezer drawer, noting some kind of sticky black spiritual residue inside this one. "Though obviously amended by now to note that I've been resurrected." Behind him, Jingyi is quiet. As he examines the residue, Wei Ying absently puts a calming hand on Chenqing. There’s resentful energy in the residue for sure. Not something you generally want in your morgue. Tendrils so thin they almost can’t be seen spider out from the residue.
"I can't tell if this is supposed to be normal or not," Jingyi finally says. His brow is furrowed in a way that kind of reminds Wei Ying of his husband. Must be genetic. "Is this a standard experience most junior disciples have or are you just really weird?"
"I mean, most people haven't legally died and been resurrected," Wei Ying says. "And I assume most junior disciples aren't hanging around senior cultivators who have had that experience. The rest of it probably seems out of the ordinary to you, but working with supernatural stuff means weird shit happens. You get used to it."
"I'm not sure I believe you, but whatever."
"Regretting having Lan Zhan as your mentor?" Wei Ying teases. The longer they're down here, the more he feels like they're being watched. Or maybe hunted would be more accurate. There's a hesitance to the presence, though, like it knows Wei Ying is a dangerous predator himself. He should probably keep a close eye on Jingyi, though. Lan Zhan would be sad if something happened to him.
"What? No, of course not!" Jingyi exclaims. Wei Ying laughs. He doesn't think he's ever seen a more offended expression on an eighteen-year-old's face. "Detective Lan is a great mentor! The best!" It's adorable. "You're the weird one!"
"Of course Lan Zhan is the best," Wei Ying agrees and decides that yes, he definitely likes Lan Jingyi a lot. Few people truly understand and appreciate what a great person Lan Zhan is, which is their loss. Jingyi gets it though.
Wei Ying picks a tendril and starts carefully tracing its path out of the open freezer drawer and into another. Opening that one reveals the same tacky looking residue smeared on the inside, ripe with resentful energy. He traces another tendril, this one crawling down across the floor until Wei Ying finds himself in front of a door. A sign declares it the incinerator room. He contemplates the door for a moment before opening it and poking his head in.
A pair of luminous eyes blink once at him before disappearing into a dark, viscous puddle growing inside the incinerator.
Wei Ying closes the door.
"Well, that explains everything," he says. "There's a demon in the incinerator."
"Demon?" Jingyi repeats, his voice noticeably higher.
"That’s what I said." Wei Ying waves a dismissive hand in the air and heads towards the stairs leading up to the funeral parlor. "No wonder it's so quiet in here. Also explains why they didn't realize there was an issue until they started renovating."
"How did they not notice an entire demon in their incinerator?" Jingyi asks. He throws anxious looks over his shoulder as they go upstairs, like he's expecting the demon to ambush them any second now.
Rather than answer, Wei Ying asks a question of his own. "What do demons typically like to eat?" Jingyi scrunches his face up as he searches through his mental notes for the answer. Junior disciples are so cute. Maybe Wei Ying should start teaching them again. Lan Qiren probably won't let him near the adorable Lan babies in Cloud Recesses, but Shijie would happily find him a position at Lotus Pier. Sure he has grad students, but it's not the same. Wei Ying's grad students all have the tired, haunted look of someone wondering if their PhD is really worth it.
"They prefer souls, right?"
"Exactly. Morgues are just a giant buffet for demons. That's why it's so important to keep your wards up to date. I’m guessing that’s the main issue here." Wei Ying finds an old faded talisman in the funeral parlor and starts tracing its energy to find the main array. It's a bit difficult with how faint the energy is, but finally they enter a room on the second floor where moving a rug reveals the dying protection array. "Yep, definitely out of date." He sighs. "Of all the things to be lazy about, why do people pick wards? I get that it can be expensive, especially for a morgue, but demon removal is way more expensive!"
"I thought the Gusu Lan sect wasn't charging for this service," Jingyi says.
"Gusu Lan does lots of pro bono work, yes, but I'm doing this investigation independently," Wei Ying says, leading Jingyi back to the main room. The owner of the building should be back soon.
"Oh. How much do you usually charge for something like this?"
"Oh, I don't really charge either." Wei Ying reconsiders. "Well, I charge when the client is an asshole. Especially if they’re a rich asshole. But for something like this I’m not interested in taking people’s money. It’s not like I need it anyway. My husband is very rich.” The front door to the funeral parlor opens and the owner steps in, looking anxious.
"How bad is it?" the morgue owner asks. He tries to refrain from wringing his hands, but loses that battle pretty quickly..
"There's a demon in your incinerator," Wei Ying tells him. The color drains from the morgue owner's face. "Ah, don't worry too much. I'll take care of it tonight. I noticed your wards are really out of date."
"I didn't realize that could happen," the morgue owner says, wincing.
"Wards don't just last forever," Jingyi says, frowning. Wei Ying flicks his ear. "Ow!"
"Don't be rude," Wei Ying chides. "Generally, you want to have your wards checked every five to ten years, depending on your location, the level of supernatural activity, the type of ward used, and all that. The ones I'm going to install can probably go about fifteen years before they need to be updated, but you should have them checked regularly anyway, just to be safe."
"How much does all of this cost?" the morgue owner asks, expression pained. Wei Ying shrugs.
"Depends who's doing it. Me? I don't charge for demon removals and ward installations. And for having them checked, the Gusu Lan sect will send someone out here to do that for free. Lanling Jin, on the other hand, can charge several hundreds of dollars for stuff like this, so I would avoid hiring them. I'm sure the renovations are already eating up enough of your budget. No need to make things harder on yourself."
"I'll remember that," the morgue owner says. He glances uneasily towards the stairs leading down to the morgue. Wei Ying puts on an easy smile.
"Like I said, don't worry too much about the demon. It'll be gone by morning."
-
Lan Jingyi is aware that he is very lucky. When he first asked about apprenticeships in the cultivation division of the police department, he braced himself to be told he wasn’t ready for that or there was no one available or to be paired with the worst detective in the division or any number of things that would inhibit his plans of one day making detective. He had not expected Lan Qiren to frown severely at him for several long, uncomfortable moments before saying, “Lan Zhan is available to take on an apprentice right now. Be aware he has high standards for those he mentors.” It had taken Jingyi a second too long to pick his jaw up off the ground, judging by the way Lan Qiren’s eyes had narrowed, but he managed to stutter out an excited acceptance and not pump his fist in the air until he was well out of Lan Qiren’s line of sight. His grades at Cloud Recesses are excellent, despite his teachers’ exasperation over his admittedly disruptive behavior. Clearly Lan Qiren must have seen this greatness or he wouldn’t have recommended Jingyi apprentice under one of the best cultivators of the modern era. Lan Zhan has taught a few of the classes Jingyi has been in and despite his quiet nature, he’s probably the best teacher Jingyi has ever had.
And then he had almost fucked it up by being five minutes late. Later, Jingyi had learned that he had the misfortune of starting his apprenticeship on one of Lan Zhan’s bad days. His new mentor had already been annoyed because he was only supposed to have worked a half shift that day and instead was stuck at the station because of an unnecessary Inquiry request at six in the morning. Lan Yuan confided in Jingyi several days later that Wei Ying had that entire day off and his parents had intended to spend the morning relaxing at home. Their demanding work schedules mean that’s something they don’t get to do together very often, so it’s understandable that Lan Zhan was upset about it. Fortunately, his valiant (in Lan Yuan’s words) attempt to stay in Wei Ying’s lab without throwing up had smoothed things over with his mentor.
Overall, his apprenticeship has been great so far. It was a little awkward at first. Lan Zhan’s reputation for being cold and aloof didn’t come from nothing, but fortunately Jingyi made quick friends with Lan Yuan, who had graciously offered a few tips for staying on his father’s good side and even getting to know him a little bit. Plus, Jingyi is the only junior in his sect who can say that he’s had the opportunity to observe the infamous Dr. Wei Ying at work (except for Lan Yuan, but that doesn’t count because Wei Ying is literally his dad). Controversial as his methods are, there’s no denying that Wei Ying’s talent in the field of cultivation is on par with Lan Zhan’s. Even before he started experimenting with resentful energy he was inventing talismans that are still used by every sect. Having the opportunity to observe someone like that in the field is a privilege, even if it turns out that Wei Ying is really fucking weird.
It’s hard to focus on that though when Jingyi is aware that there is a demon two floors below them.
“Ah, this brings back memories,” Wei Ying says. Lan Zhan makes a noise of agreement. The two of them are in the middle of updating the wards while Jingyi watches. He’s having a hard time following what they’re doing. Apparently, Wei Ying does not use standard talismans and this is not news to Lan Zhan. “That was what, two years ago? When we investigated that morgue in Yueyang?”
“Two and a half,” Lan Zhan corrects.
“Ah, that’s right! That was a fun one! I still think we should have kept the cat. It was adorable.”
“Unsanitary.”
“Sure, but there are ways to deal with that. If it was a bunny I bet you wouldn’t have argued.” Wei Ying frowns at the corner of the array he’s working on and adds an extra brush stroke to it. “The best part, though, was when we had sex on the embalming table.” Jingyi gags.
“Why do you just say things like that!” he exclaims. Wei Ying glances at him, amused.
“Aiya, Lan Zhan, why is everyone in your sect such a prude? I wonder if it’s because none of them get laid. I bet if Gusu Lan disciples had sex as regularly as you do, they wouldn’t be so afraid of it.”
“I’m not afraid of it!” Jingyi protests, feeling his cheeks heat. “I just don’t want to hear you talk about it all the time!”
“I don’t talk about it all the time,” Wei Ying argues. He tosses a crumbled up talisman at Lan Zhan when his husband makes a small noise that manages to convey a world of doubt. “Don’t bully your husband, Lan Zhan, that’s not proper Lan behavior. I’m gonna have to tell Huan-ge and then he’ll tell me that I have no choice but to divorce you and I’ll cry.”
“I doubt he would suggest that,” Lan Zhan says. Jingyi has learned to read him well enough to tell he’s amused.
“What kind of cat were you talking about earlier?” Jingyi asks in an obvious bid to redirect the conversation somewhere that has nothing to do with the sex life of his mentor and his husband.
“Undead one,” Wei Ying answers. “Probably some amateur necromancy or something like that, we never bothered to figure it out. It found its way into a cupboard. The lady who owned the morgue thought the place was haunted, which was hilarious because I mean, duh? It’s a morgue, there’s ghosts everywhere. But no, it was an undead cat just making cat sounds and knocking things off counters and stuff. You know, cat things. I suggested we keep it, but Lan Zhan was concerned that having a cat with rotting flesh in our home wouldn’t be sanitary so we gave it a nice little grave out back. It would be incredibly funny if its ghost is now haunting the morgue.” He stands up and gives the array another onceover, nodding to himself. “Okay, that’s the array finished. What about the talismans, babe, are those done yet?”
“Mn,” Lan Zhan says as he smooths one last talisman onto the wall.
“Great! That will keep out future demon infestations.” Wei Ying claps his hands together. “Alright, let’s go exorcise a demon!”
“I could stay up here and keep watch,” Jingyi suggests, trying and failing to keep the nervousness out of his voice as he follows Wei Ying and Lan Zhan down to the main floor. Despite what Jin Ling likes to claim, Jingyi is not a coward. He’s just… cautious. And really, he dares any other junior disciple to tell him they’re not worried about being in the same room as an actual real life demon.
“Keep watch for what?” Wei Ying counters. “There’s nothing here but us and the demon.” He comes over and throws an arm around Jingyi’s shoulders. “Relax, little Lan. I promise you, that demon is way more scared of me than you are of it.” He gives Jingyi’s shoulder a squeeze, then lets go of him and heads down into the morgue. Jingyi groans, then turns and meets Lan Zhan’s impassive gaze. After a moment, Lan Zhan quirks an eyebrow and tilts his head towards the stairs.
“If I die, can you say something nice at my funeral?” Jingyi asks.
“You won’t die,” Lan Zhan says. Jingyi relaxes a fraction, turning towards the stairs. “Probably.” He makes a sound Lan Yuan would probably equate to a dying whale, but he’s already two steps down the staircase and Lan Zhan is right behind him, blocking his only means of escape. Resigned, Jingyi descends into the morgue. Wei Ying waits for them by the door to the incinerator room, an amused smile on his face as he taps his flute against his shoulder.
“Should I have made a will before coming here?” Jingyi asks. He’s never thought about making a will before because he’s eighteen, but staring down the prospect of being killed by a demon is making him reconsider.
Wei Ying makes a thoughtful noise. “Probably not. What would you even put in it at this point?” Okay, fair point. Still. “So! Lan Zhan! Strategy. What’s ours?”
“You tell me,” Lan Zhan says. Wei Ying stops tapping his flute against his shoulder and starts twirling it between his fingers.
“I mean, we could-”
“No.”
“Lan Zhan, you didn’t even let me finish!”
“Wei Ying, I do not want a demon in our house.”
Wei Ying sticks his bottom lip out in a pout. “You’re no fun.” He sighs. “Fine, I won’t keep it. Suppose the first step is to get it out of the incinerator and into an array. Getting it to move will probably take both of us, so...” His eyes land on Jingyi. “Ah, perfect!” Jingyi takes an unconscious step back. “What’s with that look? I’m not gonna ask you to do anything hard.”
“I don’t want to be demon bait,” Jingyi blurts.
“Funny as that would be, that’s not what I have in mind.” Wei Ying takes out a blank talisman paper and scribbles the most indecipherable talisman Jingyi has ever seen. It looks like his two year old cousin’s drawings, which is not what you usually want in a talisman. Wei Ying holds it out to him. “Stop looking at me like that, it's a perfectly good talisman. No, hey- Lan Zhan, tell him there’s nothing wrong with the talisman. If you say it, he’ll believe it.”
Lan Zhan glances at the talisman and proclaims, “Messy.” Wei Ying smacks his arm.
“I didn’t ask you to critique my calligraphy!”
“The talisman will work.”
“See?” Wei Ying waves the talisman in Jingyi’s face and Jingyi reluctantly takes it. Like every other talisman he’s seen Wei Ying make tonight, he doesn’t recognize the structure. “So, Lan Zhan and I will do all the hard work of getting the demon to leave the incinerator. Once Lan Zhan tells you, throw the talisman at the demon. It’ll activate an entrapment array. Easy, right?” He doesn’t wait for an answer before opening the incinerator room door.
I'm gonna die, Jingyi thinks as he follows them inside.
There's a definite change in the atmosphere as soon as Jingyi sets foot over the threshold. He shivers, looking nervously at the open door of the incinerator. It looks, at first glance, like a perfectly normal incinerator, but as Jingyi continues to stare at it he notices the way the shadows in the interior keep shifting. The demon hisses.
"Hey."
Jingyi startles and looks at Wei Ying, who has his flute poised to play. Beside him, Lan Zhan sits on the ground, his qin laid out across his lap.
"Ready?" Wei Ying asks.
"No," Jingyi answers.
"Great. Lan Zhan."
The duet is impressive. Being a disciple of the Gusu Lan sect, Jingyi has had a lot of opportunity to observe talented musicians making use of it for cultivation. Wei Ying and Lan Zhan are on a different level. The quick, fluid melody of the flute weaves perfectly with the smooth, steady harmony of the qin, beckoning. The demon hisses again. It writhes inside the incinerator, resisting. The flute's melody hardens into something more commanding. Inch by inch, the demon starts to exit the incinerator, hissing and struggling the whole way. Jingyi has the hysterical thought that it reminds him of an angry cat.
When the demon is a furious thrashing formless mass on the ground, Lan Zhan says, "Jingyi." Jingyi almost drops the talisman. He throws it forward and it shatters into a glowing red array that settles around the demon. Wei Ying and Lan Zhan finally stop playing.
"Perfect," Wei Ying says. He tilts his head as he observes the demon. "Now, what to do with this little guy." He taps his nose a few times, thinking. Jingyi is barely paying attention. His heart is pounding so hard and fast in his chest he thinks he might need to sit down, but doesn't dare. Just in case the array isn't as stable as Wei Ying believes it to be and he needs to run. "Hey, Lan Zhan, want to try Inquiry on a demon?" Lan Zhan makes a considering noise.
"It could not hurt to try," he says after a while. He sets his hands on the strings and plays the opening notes of Inquiry. The demon hisses again. In the end, it takes three total repetitions of the notes to force the demon into compliance. The reply is a series of angry, discordant notes that would probably snap the strings of a normal qin.
"What did it say?" Wei Ying asks. Jingyi can't help but lean in a bit, also eager for the answer. He's been focusing a lot of his study on Inquiry lately, but he doesn't recognize any of the words. Lan Zhan shakes his head. "What? Was it nonsense? What did it say?"
"Several rude things about your ancestors," Lan Zhan says. Jingyi can't quite hold back the hysterical laugh that bubbles up.
"Why just my ancestors?" Wei Ying complains, frowning at the demon. Another series of angry notes crashes through the air.
"It would like you to leave," Lan Zhan translates.
"Just me?"
"Just you."
Wei Ying crosses his arms. "What, so it can eat Jingyi in peace?" Jingyi makes a strangled sound and takes a step back. "Relax, even if I did leave, Lan Zhan wouldn't let you get eaten. I don't suppose it can tell us what it wants. Other than souls, obviously." Lan Zhan obligingly plays the question. The demon shrieks and violently plays an answer.
"Give food back," Lan Zhan translates. "I am not sure this will be productive Wei Ying." Another string of violent notes from the demon. Lan Zhan frowns and plays a chord, putting a large surge of spiritual power into it. The demon shrinks back against the far side of the array.
"Yeah, probably not," Wei Ying agrees. "Was worth a shot."
"What were you hoping it would say?" Jingyi asks. "You can't put a demon to rest."
"Incorrect. It's extremely difficult and relies on being able to gather information that you don't necessarily have the time or ability to gather, but I have cleansed a demon before." Wei Ying taps his flute against his shoulder a few times. "Well, we could put the demon back in its hole and seal it up. With the new wards it won't be able to get back in."
"What if it just finds a new morgue though?" Jingyi asks.
"Exactly right, baby Lan."
"Baby Lan?" Jingyi repeats, making a face. "I know you know my name."
"It's a nickname," Wei Ying says. "But yes, suppressing the problem in this case just means it'll eventually become someone else's problem, which would be very irresponsible of us. And since Lan Zhan has already told me I'm not allowed to keep it I guess that just leaves eradication."
"How do you eradicate a demon?"
Wei Ying looks at Jingyi. "You tell me."
"...Stab it?" It feels like an overly simple solution to a demon living in a morgue, but that is what a cultivator's sword is for. Non cultivators often think swords are just ceremonial in the modern era because surely cultivators just use guns with magic bullets or something. Which would be cool, honestly, but comes with several problems that can be easily solved by just sticking with swords.
"You want to do the honors?" Wei Ying offers. Jingyi takes several steps back until he's standing in the doorway of the room, shaking his head. "Your loss. Guess it's all you, babe." Lan Zhan returns his qin to the qiankun pouch at his waist and stands, drawing his sword. He eyes the demon.
"Wei Ying," he says.
"Yeah, sure," Wei Ying says easily. He lifts his flute and begins to play a fast paced, aggressive song. In the array, the demon writhes. Gradually, its movements become more restricted until it's been forced to remain still. Immediately, Lan Zhan thrusts his sword forward. The demon's shriek is loud and piercing. For a moment it seems like nothing will happen. Jingyi doesn’t dare breathe. Then the demon begins to melt, becoming a bubbling, viscous mess on the floor. Jingyi is just wondering who’s going to be forced to clean up that mess (he just knows it’ll be him) when the melted demon puddle starts evaporating. Wei Ying doesn’t stop playing until the last of it is gone. The silence in the morgue is deafening after the earsplitting shrieks.
"Is that it?" Jingyi asks. "It's gone?"
"Gone," Lan Zhan confirms.
"Now we just have to do all the purification stuff," Wei Ying says. "You two can do that. I'll check the rest of the place, just to make sure there's nothing we missed, and then I'll call the owner." He sashays out of the room, humming as he twirls his flute between his fingers. Lan Zhan sits on the ground and manifests his qin again, gesturing for Jingyi to join him. It takes a moment for Jingyi to unstick his feet from the floor and sit beside his mentor, manifesting his own qin.
It’s not until they’re done purifying the room that Jingyi finally gathers himself enough to say, “I’m not sure I’m cut out to be a cultivator.”
“First demon is always difficult,” Lan Zhan says.
“Were you afraid the first time you saw a demon?”
Lan Zhan gives Jingyi a flat look. “Yes.” He puts his qin away and stands, waiting for Jingyi before leading him back towards the stairs. “If you truly do not feel you are suited to this work, there are other careers a cultivator can pursue. We can discuss it tomorrow.”
“Eh, I think I’ll be okay,” Jingyi decides. “This was just… a lot.”
“Bubble bath.”
“Bubble bath?” Jingyi repeats, almost missing a step. He heard that right, didn’t he?
“Oh, yes!” Wei Ying does an excited half skip as he meets them in the main room. “Lan Zhan, we should have a bubble bath when we get home! Unless you’d rather go to sleep? It’s late. Wait, what are you doing tomorrow? Your schedule has been so weird this week I can’t keep track.”
“I have tomorrow off,” Lan Zhan says. “We will have a bubble bath.”
“Excellent! Do we have wine? Or did I drink the last of it? I love having wine with bubble baths. Wine and my husband! No bubble bath is complete without them!”
“We will buy some on the way home.”
“You really are the best husband, Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying says and kisses Lan Zhan on the cheek. Jingyi almost thinks he’s hallucinating when Lan Zhan smiles. “You should have a bubble bath when you get home, baby Lan. Best thing ever after dealing with demons.” He stretches, then checks the time on his phone. “The morgue owner should be here in a few minutes. Then we can wrap this up and head out of here!” Jingyi just nods and wanders over to an old chintz chair and sits down. Maybe he will take a bubble bath. It couldn’t hurt.
One thing is for sure. The next time anyone suggests he accompany Wei Ying on an investigation Jingyi is going to ask more questions. A lot more questions.