Work Text:
Addicted
“No it’s fine, I’m going to spend it hunting and with the new book. It still needs editing. I doubt we even see each other.” My sensitive ears pick up the words on the phone.
“You sure you’re going to be okay here - with him? You’ve never…” Edward pulls me close, nuzzling into my neck as he waits for Ness to finish packing. I pull away, feeling ill at the wrongness of his touch. It's been this way for a while and he always ignores it; that his determination to love me will make it all go away.
“God, she’s a grown woman, not a child. The only thing that would happen is they sit and have the most boring conversations ever. Come on Ness!” Jake hollers up the stairs making me jump and Edward scowls at the obnoxious tone. “You really don’t trust anyone with her do you? Not even someone she’s known for ten years. What would you do if I did the same thing to Ness?”
“Come on, Dad. They need to get this shit figured out. They’re as bad as you and Jake. We’ll know how it goes based on whether the house is still standing when we get back. They just snarl and snap at each other. Mom’s proved she can hold her own. Uncle Jasper would never permanently hurt her.”
Edward takes a big breath in. “Fine.” I know he’s thinking of the incident five years ago when he and Alice walked in on Jasper and I having a massive fight in a trashed forest clearing. A fight that led to Edward in a fight with Jasper as Alice cries that it’s over. She can’t deal with his bullshit and antagonizing attitudes anymore. He can come with her or it’s over.
It was over, Jasper refused to leave so Alice took off to Paris where she’s now seeing Toshiro, a Japanese vampire. Jasper’s bedroom was destroyed that day and I was the one who had to put out the literal fire before it destroyed not only him but the rest of the house. It led to another fight, in another clearing and now the stilted hated game between us.
Rose and Emmett couldn’t take the tension so left to travel. It even got to Carlisle and Esme who are now on an extended stay until we get our heads out of our asses; Emmett’s words.
For the first time we are alone with the exception of hunts where we’ve lost ourselves in the heat of assignations that should never have happened the first time, but now I can’t stay away. He’s a chemical inside my brain, an addiction I need to feed.
We wait a full day, as I’m staring out the Juliette balcony of my personal office when he’s there, breathing on my neck, his gift sliding against my skin in the silken caress of bursting fireworks. His hands follow his gift, gliding against me stuttering my breath.
Mouth replaces hands as a bite follows the lave of a tongue on my shoulder flowing to his claiming mark. The bite was deep into my neck that scraped the bones of my clavicle feeding his venom into my broken bones, scarring them, making me his.
Knowing it will heal before anyone sees, he bites deep, rebreaking bones as if he tries to rid my body of Edward’s turning venom. “You’re mine.” The growl is deep, guttural, full of longing, rage, want and need as the feelings glide against my spine forcing my compliance as the drug of his gift hits my system, weakening my knees until he’s holding me up. His hands are hard, clutching at my hips, crushing me into the hardness of him. He could tear me apart so easily with his hands, leaving me a splatter of molecules - just like he leaves me every time after; molecules on the floors of forests, caves, hotel rooms, but never here until this day.
It’s his game, feeding my addiction to take it away leaving not a trace until I’m going out of my mind; jittery, anxious, full of need and aching for just one more time. Every time I come back for more - more of him and the chemicals that leave my mind yearning for things that can’t be.
“Who do you belong to?” It’s deep, a command that will decide what happens to me. The correct answer is always his choice. More often than not leaving me in an unfulfilled wreck, alone as he walks away.
“You. Always you.” I see it, waiting for either punishment or pleasure; sometimes it’s both or nothing. The nothing is worse, he used the nothing for over a year after Alice left. Always it comes to this point as his gift glides against my skin. It awakens my every sense, filling me with a need so deep it’s physically painful then he’d walk away abruptly pulling everything away leaving me with nothing.
He moves my hair. Lightly kissing the back of my neck, as his hands glide under the hem of my dress, up and over my thigh trailing hot want, need and the lust that throbs until my stomach quivers with it. Like so many times he moves away, leaving me panting, weak, needy to fall to the floor at his feet.
The door clicks shut as he leaves. Sobbing on the floor, I feel dirty, used with the feeling of needing to vomit hitting my stomach. Two minutes later, it caresses against my skin, building until it crashes over me - a tsunami of lust bringing me to a precipice of flying, bursting like fireworks in the sky as the orgasm wracks my body until I’m screaming, clawing at the floor I arch until I’m sure my back will break.
I’m still there hours later, the latent high crackling against my skin like clothing static.
His boots are hard on the floor as he enters, stopping at my head where I’m sobbing on the floor.
“Who do you belong to?” He bends to his haunches, gently pushing a lock of hair out of my face, then trails his finger down my face, the electricity revving up. His golden eyes are hardened topaz showing no emotion as he waits for my response.
“You, Jasper. Always you.” He lifts me into his arms then, walking out of the room then down the hall to his.
So tender, so gently and loving that it takes my breath away he strips my dress. His mouth follows each tine of the zipper down my spine in languishing kisses that tighten my belly as he follows the fabric down over my ass and my legs until he’s worshipping at my feet. I dare the temptation, running my fingers through his hair as he begins kissing upward, his hands running up the back of my legs until he’s at my core and ripping the slight lace of panties away. Picking me up by my hips he turns, placing me at the end of the bed as his tongue travels up my inner thigh until he’s buried it in me. He makes me scream for him, using just his body to wring the pleasure out of me instead of his gift.
Once I’ve orgasmed, screaming out his name he crawls up on me, his kisses leaving a trail of desire that’s all him. It's even worse somehow when he doesn’t use his gift, when he gives me just himself and the feelings are his own instead of manufactured submission.
I want to please him more during these times.
His mouth is gentle on my breasts, loving, wonderful and so tender it makes me cry when he kisses my mouth as his eyes soften, glowing in depth and love. His eyes roll for a second when his thick, long, hard length eases in deep on the first stroke.
Lifting me to him, he holds me close to kiss, lick and suck on every part of me within range of his mouth. His thrusts are slow, steady and hard - making love to me instead of just fucking me hard for release. In these moments he’ll let me make love back, allowing me to kiss the pain and history of his scars away as I give him all I am.
He shudders under my kiss, opening his eyes wide allowing me to see all of him; the demon and the man. I belong to them; addicted to submitting to the demon as much as I am addicted to my love of the man. “I’m yours, only yours my love - always.” I whisper it against his lips, feeding it through my skin until he trembles under me.
The fireworks that explode are the Boston Pops on the 4th of July; a wild cavalcade into the stratosphere leaving me gasping, clutching him to me as I pour my love for him through his gift. He follows, my name growling out of him as he thrusts in, burying himself deeply to erupt and join me in the sky.
He holds me, fingers gliding through my hair as my head lays on his chest; the heart that once beat laying empty. He once said that he only feels now when he’s with me otherwise he’s more dead inside than any body he’s ever destroyed. That my feelings are his addiction crackling like lightning to return him to life like Frankenstein’s monster.
He asked me if I could ever accept a heartless monster that ruled a man who couldn’t feel anymore. My answer is - yes, always. It’s getting harder to stay away, the fighting gets worse the more we try.
On the third day, a day before Edward is due back I walk in to find him packing his room looking steadily more empty.
“What are you doing?” He nearly shoves me away when I go to touch him.
“Leaving.”
“What!” It’s nearly a screech as I go to grab him to face me.
We’ve done this dance before; so many times. Usually after we’ve made love instead of just me submitting to his desires and addictions. He shoves me away. Me still maintaining a slight clumsiness when I’m insecure forces me into a chair tipping it over, rolling me into a stand that crashes to the floor in glass, books and a broken lamp.
“No. You’re not doing this to me again.” I’m up at him, pushing him into the dresser where more clutter falls to the floor including an old wedding photo of him and Alice that shatters. He picks it up, then flings it against the wall so hard it goes through. It nearly misses my head.
Picking me up as I stand in his way, he tosses me onto the bed like a ragdoll where it collapses in a pile of rubble, bringing the screwed headboard out of the wall along with a good chunk of wall. Scrambling up, I give a hard shove moving the pile to block the door taking everything in its path with it where a piece catches Jasper behind the knees sending him tumbling into a dresser where it overturns.
He’s up but resolved instead of the pissed off I want him to be. He’s never said that I’m the cause of destruction in our fights. He’s never lifted a finger to physically hurt me, just to keep me away and angry instead of breaking in anguish.
“I’m tired of the game, Isabella.” He checks me in the shoulder as he moves away to return to packing. Fury rolls off of me like heat waves on pavement.
“The game you created. It’s not a game to me, Jasper.” Grabbing his elbow I pull him around to face me. His eyes turn black in a second, his demon right at the edge turning his face to hard granite. He’s trying to remember just why he’s never physically fought me, no matter how hard I push him.
“That’s your problem not mine. I’m only here because no one has fucking managed to put me down. I’m done, I’ll find a volcano and do what no one can do - end it.”
I attack then, and he’s waiting for it but I manage to get on his back wrapping around him. I can’t do this again. Without thinking I sink my mouth deep, down through flesh, tendon and into bone breaking it. The venom in my mouth is pouring out so deeply it’s soaking through his shirt as he cries in pain, dropping to his knees.
In the five years we've been doing this I’ve never claimed him as a vampire. It’s on instinct; the instinct to claim what belongs to me - what is mine. The chemical of all that I am keeps going, determined to bring the demon to heel so the man I love can surface.
I allow my mouth to let go just enough to get the words out. “Who do you belong to?”
He sobs, the man breaking as the claim takes hold as he turns, leaning up against the dresser so I can be in his lap. “You. Always you.”
His eyes are shining in venom that begins to drop as his forehead leans against mine. “I can’t do this any more Bella. I can’t watch as my mate loves someone else, fucks someone else…I can’t. The rage, the pain and the love. Just let me go.” His hands are gentle on my face as he continues to cry, all the bottled emotions falling out to land between us.
“I can’t. I can’t live without my mate anymore. I love you - all of you, Jasper.”
The love we make on the floor among the broken pieces is the most powerful we’ve ever experienced. He lets me take control, riding him until I fall against him to press kisses all over his face before we both sink into the marks tying us together. I pour all of my love for him into it. For the first time I feel him, his love for me. It burns through me like turning fire, burning Edward’s away until there is only Jasper.
We both packed that night. I leave a note for Edward and Ness telling them I’ll call soon but that I can’t do it anymore. I can’t deny my mate anymore. We are on the road just as they come home.
After
Ness tells me later when she and Jake visit that Edward destroyed the house until Jake subdued him forcing him to admit the truth. He’s known all along; from that first day in Forks that Jasper and I were mates. He wanted me more for himself and he and Alice worked it so that we would never be alone. Alice said she saw us killing each other. It worked until it all bubbled over and we nearly destroyed each other.
I can’t say we don’t fight or tear apart houses anymore - cause we do, especially when I can’t be angry at Edward or Alice. I wouldn’t have Nessie and force him to admit that it was worth it for her. He doesn’t make me submit to his gift anymore, admitting it did it for all the pain he felt every time I was with Edward. How he could feel my orgasm only to be left with nothing.
It’s taking time but we’re getting better. There is nowhere else I want to be, but at his side even when his demon becomes an irascible bastard, but never at me any more, claiming the bastard loved me just as much as the man. We never return to the Cullens, instead making a home in the wilds of Montana where Ness and Jake spend half the year with us then Edward. Surprisingly the trip worked and Jake and Edward have become closer, working through their issues for Ness.
Jasper fell to his knees when they came to us with the news asking Jasper if he was ready to trade uncle for Grandpa. He grabbed my beautiful daughter in a hug so tight it caused Jake to growl. The first time he held the squalling twins, a little girl and boy, the demon faded so far into the background he only came out in the case of imminent threat.
That threat happened sooner than we wanted. We were once again forced to combine families as witnesses to the first hybrid vampire, shifter children born in history.
Jasper took a full blast from Jane even as Aro yelled at her to stand down. She refused - Jasper never faltered until he threw the head he lit on fire at Aro's feet and said next time he’d burn them all to hell before they touch his family. He then brought Aro to his knees in an emotional pain so strong it leveled the whole field except me, Ness and the twins who are growing at human speed.
Five years have passed and we have peace. Aro tried once to kill Jasper and went home to Volterra in a box of ashes along with Alec. Marcus soon found a volcano, throwing himself in leaving only Caius to lead us. He offered a position to Jasper who declined wanting only peace.
I’m still as addicted to my mate, now from his love sliding across me instead the chemicals of his pain, and hellacious anguish from watching me with Edward. Caius made it punishable by death to ever keep known mates apart using us as an example of the bond threatening to destroy everything around it to fulfill the claim.
Standing on the hill I look down at the children playing. Ness and Jake have added to their brood, a little girl now three and her one year old brother. Firm arms come around my waist kissing my claiming mark. “Who do you belong to?” The words purr through me, activating the addictive chemicals that make me melt in my mates arms filling me with love, want and need as they glide across my skin in tiny fireworks of desire..
“You. Always you.”