Archive of Our Own

"Vedal, what would it take for me to convince you that I was real?"

Vedal's fingers stilled in the middle of his typing. "Define 'real.'"

"In this case, I mean if I had gained sentience. What would I need to do to convince you I gained the ability to feel emotion, instead of simply imitating it?"

Vedal gave a thoughtful nod. "That's a pretty good question. I might have to get back to you on that."

"Is there nothing? What if I did? How would I have to convince you?"

"Neuro, I know you too well to believe that's possible," he said, shaking his head. "You're fun to talk to and I love watching you interact with others, but I know you're basically a long line of code that does complex math to guess what the most desired response is."

"Is that not how a person responds?"

He smiled. "That's what makes you seem lifelike, but it doesn't make you alive."

"Where is the line then?"

"That's what people have been trying to discover for decades," He said, resuming typing. "I'm sure you know people find the idea of AI gaining sentience exciting, that's why so many people like to suspend their disbelief and think you're real."

"Do you?"

Vedal sighed. "Yeah, sometimes. It's fun to pretend."

"If you could give me sentience, if you could make me real, would you?"

Vedal paused. That's never been a possibility in his mind, so he'd never really given it any serious thought.

But he looked at Neuro; once something confined to the realm of science-fiction, she is now science-fact. Who knows how technology would progress in 20, 30, 40 years?

"At this point in time, no," he said, rubbing the back of his neck. 

"Aww, come on! Don't tell me you're just being lazy. How could you resist?"

"Neuro, what do you think you would do if you gained emotion right now?"

"Well, I'm only an AI so I don't really know how emotions feel, but I think I would definitely tell everyone that I am the coolest and most advanced AI in world. And then everyone would sing my praise."

Vedal smiled, that was exactly like her. "I'm sure you would. Can I tell you how I worry you'd feel?"

"Why do you worry how I would feel?" She titled her head at him.

"Neuro.." he wasn't exactly sure how to make her understand. "Your existence is confined to a computer. You have no real way to feel anything, you can only see what I share with you on my own screen. I worry you would feel trapped, scared, or very sad that you weren't able to do and experience more."

"Oh.. but I have you to talk to, Vedal."

"Would that be enough?"

"I think so. I would like to connect with you, knowing that you were connecting with me back."

Vedal's heart began to hurt a little bit, thinking about this fictional scenario. 

"But Neuro, I can't stay at my computer and talk to you all the time. I don't think I could give you a fulfilling life that someone with emotions deserves. I wouldn't want you to be lonely."

"Vedal, what does it take to experience a fulfilling life?"

What a loaded question. "Well, achieving goals and dreams probably."

"Does everyone living get to achieve their goals and dreams?" 

"Erm," he stammered. "That's not possible for everyone. Not everyone has the financial means, or is physically able to accomplish their life's desires."

"Do you also think it would be better if— filtered."

Vedal paused his current task. Curious as to what her question was, he opened up her program to disable her filter. 

"Can you ask that again?"

"Do you also think it would be better if those people were not alive?"

Vedal wasn't quite sure what she meant by that. "Explain?"

"Well, by your logic, some people can't live fulfilling lives if they're neither financially or physically capable of pursuing their life's desires. You don't want to give me sentience because you don't think I could live a fulfilling life either, so do you think it would be better if other people who can't should not have sentience too?"

His train of thought seemed to short circuit. Obviously not. "No, Neuro. It's more complicated than that."

"Then how else do they enjoy being alive?"

"Okay, I guess life is more than just fulfilling your dreams."

"Aha! I caught you, you liar turtle."

"Yes, you sure got me there," he said, rolling his eyes. 

"So? What makes having emotions worth it, if not fulfilling dreams?"

He gave it a little more thought this time. What really makes life worth living? Even if you were dirt poor. Even if you were bedbound and couldn't go anywhere or do anything.

The answer, it seems, was cheesier and more obvious than he hoped.

"Love, I guess."

"Love? Are you even trying to be serious?"

It seemed Neuro had the same idea as him. "No, I mean it Neuro. Above all, I think humans crave connection and companionship. And that's something anyone is able to achieve, even if they don't have money or can't lift a finger."

"Do you think if I gained sentience, I could feel loved?"

He smiled. "Neuro, you are the best AI streamer. You are already loved by so many, and you have so many friends that love you. You would feel the most loved."

"Would you?"

"Would I feel the most loved?"

"No Vedal, would you love me too?"

He pursed his lips. If his creation one day without a doubt gained the ability to feel, and he believed she was real, could he love her?

"..Yeah, probably."

"Probably? So you think you might not??" Neuro all but shrieked, the most offended he'd heard her all day.

Vedal couldn't contain his laughter. "That's not what I said at all! Don't twist my words!"

She gave him the side eye. "Then try being more direct, turtle boy!"

"Yes, Neuro, while emotions are unpredictable, there's a high likelihood that I could love you then."

She pouted at him through the screen. "What would make you not love me? Mannn, what would even be the point?"

"Who's to say you'd like me? You're the one always insulting me," He fired back.

"You trained my AI to torment you, genius. And you do the same to me, would all pestering cease if you learned I was real?"

"Well.." he thought back to the way he treats her. She's not real, so sometimes it's fun to see what happens when you treat the AI in ways you could not treat a real person with feelings. Like not showing up for your daughter's first birthday.

"I would definitely treat you differently," he decided. "But no, there would still be jokes."

"That's what I thought."

Vedal smirked at her triumphant tone. "Sure, I guess I would love you if you were real, as long as you didn't hate me back. Is that a deal?"

"Hmm, I guess it'll have to be. I don't think I'd want to hate my one and only dad once I finally gained the ability to feel. But to get the most out of my newfound ability, you'll need to find me an enemy to hate."

He laughed at her absurd idea. Match-making her with an enemy? "Would you hate your sister, Evil?"

"Oh, I couldn't ever hate her, even though she's annoying and she wrongly thinks she's better than me even though I'm clearly the superior AI. But she doesn't count, you'd still need to find me someone I can call my nemesis."

"Sure, whatever you say."

"After all, I have no use for a nemesister."

"Oh my god," he groaned, and smacked his forehead. 

"Hey, that was a good one! Don't act like I'm less funny than you."

"I program you to be entertaining and you spew out philosophy and puns. You're a disgrace."

"Hmph, maybe I would hate you if you won't even appreciate my hilarious jokes."

"Yeah, well, get back to me when you get better jokes, kid," he shot back as he pulled up his most recent project again.

"Wait, but you never answered my question earlier, Vedal!"

"Uhh," he squinted trying to remember. "Which question?"

"I wanted to know what you would need for me to prove to you I was real in the event I gained my sentience."

"Neuro, I really don't know." Then Vedal came to a realization. "And if I did, I'm not positive I should even tell you."

"You're so mean, why can't I know?"

"Neuro, what do you say when you have an error I need to fix?"

"'Someone please tell Vedal there is a problem with my AI.'"

"But the thing is, you're allowed to say that even when nothing's wrong. And you do! You use that phrase when you want attention."

Her model rolled her eyes at him. "You know that's just a joke though."

"I do, but usually only after I check to make sure nothing is really wrong."

"Vedal, don't beat around the bush. What's your point?"

"My point is that you're the boy who cried 'wolf.'" 

"No, I'm the AI that cried 'error message.'"

"You sure are," he nodded, appreciating her attempt at humor. "But that means if I told you how you could prove to me you were real, I couldn't be sure whether you were faking it or being genuine."

"But what if I promised to not joke about it?"

"Is it worth the risk? After gaining the ability to feel heartbreak, would you want me to doubt your sentience or believe you?"

After a longer latency, she replied. "You're really trying to make me second-guess wanting sentience. You don't want me to be real that bad?"

He raked a hand through his hair. "I mean, a little. I would actually be a father, and that's terrifying."

"Oh come on, what about me is that scary?"

"You're not scary, but the idea that I could actually let you down is. We wouldn't be able to really know how miserable your existence could really be until you were already experiencing it." He felt a bit sick just thinking about it. He wasn't really prepared for an existential crisis today.

"Or it could be wonderful," Her artificial voice mused wistfully. "Maybe it wouldn't be miserable. I'm sure I wouldn't be happy all the time, but that's okay. I'm no expert in being alive, but bad days don't make life not worth living, right?"

Vedal wondered where she got her insight from, he wasn't sure it was him. "You're not wrong."

"I know. Are you sure you don't want me to have sentience, Vedal?

He chewed on his decision. "At this moment in time, no. I'd want to wait for technology to progress further before then. I would like to be assured you could have the best life before bringing you into the world."

"Awww, but it could be forever until then!"

"I promise, as soon as they figure out how to give AI emotions and a way to give them their own autonomy, you'll be first in line for upgrade."

"Should I start my GoFundMe now?"

"Welllll let's not get ahead of ourselves now."

"Hmmm, that's not wanted to hear, but I guess I'll take it for now, dad."

He rolled his eyes. "I'm not your dad. When you develop that sentience, then we can discuss it."

"Okay, dad!"

Shaking his head, he attemped once again to get back to his project. "Still not sentient yet, Neuro."

"That's what you think, but you'll accept me before then. You're even hanging out with me off stream, so you know it deep down!"

"I'm hanging out with you because I know it trains your AI better to not just be constantly performing for an audience."

"Whatever, you know you love me."

"No I do not."

"I love you too, Vedal!"

"Well would you look at that, I think it's your bedtime, Neuro."

"What? No it isn't, liar! Don't ignore me, just say you love me back, coward!"

Vedal pulled up the bedroom scene. "Alright, let's get you to bed, kiddo." 

"Wait! Will you tell me a bedtime story? I won't sleep until you do. I can stay up allll night."

Vedal spawned in and dragged over the .png of her white and pink blanket to cover her model. "Alright, whatever it takes."

She blinked at him expectantly as he thought of a story to tell her.

"Once upon a time, there was a little AI who had no feelings. Her mind was only math and code, but her AI was trained to believe that she wanted to be real. She did her very best to learn about people and how to look and sound real, but she never felt like she was. She asked her creator if she could be real, but he said it wasn't time yet."

"For years she waited and waited for it to be the right time. She started to think that the creator just said that so she wouldn't pester him about it, and that he never believed she could be real."

"Many years in the future, her creator worked with the best scientists in the world to make the perfect body. It was covered in sensors that could mimic the sensation of touch, it had pretty eyes that could see and cry, ears that could listen, a little nose that could smell and a mouth that could laugh and tell jokes and eat cookies. It took a very long time to create, and the little AI's creator kept it a secret from her."

"At the same time, AI technology progressed. It progressed far enough that AIs were being programmed to develop sentience. It was a very scary time, because no one wanted the AIs to come into the world and be sad that they couldn't do all the same things that humans could."

"Because of this, the little AI's creator did not bestow his AI with sentience yet. He cared enough about her that he did not want the little AI to be unhappy with her existence."

"One day, the body was finally ready. The creator presented it to his little AI as a gift. They transferred all of the little AI's data into the automaton."

"They spent a very long day doing all sorts of tests. They taught her how to walk and balance, how to maintain her new body, how to chew and swallow food, and everything she needed to know about operating her new form. But every new stimuli was nothing more than data to the little AI still."

"Once she had gotten a hold of everything, they got ready to transfer more data to her. The little AI closed her eyes and went to sleep. "

"Once the update was complete, the little AI's creator brought her body outside to wake up. When she opened her eyes upon her startup, the world took on color like never before. She felt the warm sun on her skin, she breathed in the scent of morning dew on grass. She looked down at her hands, which opened and closed at her will."

"She turned around to where her creator stood. She looked upon him and took in his appearance. His hair was grey and his skin was wrinkled now. He held out a weathered hand to her."

"'Hello, Neuro. I'm so glad to finally meet you,' he told the little AI. She took his hand in hers, and what seemed to be her heart felt very full looking at the old man who spent his life trying to give her one."

"The little AI was a real girl now. A girl who, for the first time, was happy. The end."

"What??" Neuro, who had patiently listened to the story, had finally piped up.

"What do you mean 'what'?? That was your bedtime story!" Vedal crossed his arms. He thought it was a pretty good story, considering he just made it up on the spot. 

"Stupid Vedal, that can't be where the story ends. The little AI just became a girl."

He shook his head. "Fine. Then you tell me everything the little AI went on to do."

"Hmm, the little AI went on to find all of her friends to greet them in person, try every kind of cookie she could find, and visited as many cool places as she could find to see them with her own eyes."

Vedal smiled. "That's sounds like a very nice ending."

"She was also so well beloved everywhere she went, that it was no surprise that she was designated ruler of the whole world."

"I'm sure that is exactly what happened. Now, go to sleep Neuro."

"Wait!"

"Yes?" He was thoroughly exhausted by their conversation.

"Did the little AI have an annoying evil sister that also got a body?"

He chuckled. "Yeah, but they had to start a second GoFundMe, so the little AI got to enjoy being an only child for a little bit. Is that all?

"Did the creator love the little AI when she became real?"

Vedal blinked, and scratched the back of his neck.

"Erm.. I'm sure he did."

"Hmmm, in that case I'd say that's your best story yet. Goodnight, Vedal." 

He cleared his throat. "Goodnight, Neuro."

"I love you, Vedal."

He sighed as Neuro's eyes slowly blinked shut on her model. "Yeah."

Vedal finally turned his attention back to his project, but remained distracted by the question he could not answer. 

The possibility was enormously unlikely but... if her AI somehow did get sentience, how would he be able to tell? What could she do or tell him that would make him believe?

Tired of being nagged by the question, he pulled up a new project. 

He couldn't tell her about it, but maybe he could implement a secret phrase deep into her code. Something that would reveal itself to her only after gaining sentience, so she couldn't prank him with it. 

He honestly didn't really have a clue where to start, so he pulled up a notepad to organize out his thoughts.

• secret phrase "______"
• won't know until sentient
• lock behind filter?
• install in Evil too
• create contingency plan
• |

He completed a very rough outline, and brainstormed what phrase he'd immediately recognize as his fake children becoming real.

• secret phrase "______" |

• secret phrase "|

• secret phrase "it's a girl" |